Alternative Counselling

mental health musings from a counsellor's perspective

[alternativecounselling]

Self-Care Sunday

It’s been a rough couple of months as I can see the finish line for practicum. As a student counsellor, it is easy to start feeling burn-out because of long hours, not getting paid for the time spent at placement, and then not having much time to practice self-care.

Activities such as going to the gym regularly have been cut out of my life because of COVID-19. I did not want to risk getting sick during practicum placement and set myself back career wise (as this has already been set back – as I was supposed to graduate in December 2020). I’ve been gaining weight and feel more exhausted than ever.

I ended up signing up for the “Dump Truck Challenge” through Sugifit Saskatoon to help ease myself into taking care of my physical well-being. The dump truck challenge tries to keep you accountable for the time you spend completing some of the activities, including work outs a couple times a week. You are added to a group chat of other like-minded individuals also completing the challenges, and you get to mark off a virtual “bingo card” throughout the 20 days of the program to enter to win a prize.

My first week into it, -- I’m not going to lie -- I felt like a complete failure. I completed only 1/3 of the program recommended. I cried my eyes out that night. When I was physically active I would be going to the gym 3-4 times per week, and I could see the results that were happening over time. I felt strong, capable, and confident. Now, looking at myself in the mirror I have seen the changes that have occurred for my body -- stretch marks, extra weight, and how sickly and exhausted I look (Thank god for masks to hide my feelings of fatigue).

My partner assured me that I had to change my point of view on things and to not be as hard on myself, because often times people will give up on workout programs because they expect to be able to do the whole workout right when they get access to them, and they also hope to have results right away. It also was discouraging to see other people posting about their progress, and then seeing myself struggle so much to do some of the basics.

I started thinking about this more over time, and I realized that I was not using some of the advice that I normally give to clients surrounding goal setting. In counselling -- SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time Sensitive) can be used to help people take the smaller steps necessary to achieve bigger goals.

As I took a step back, I told myself that I had to start doing the things I was doing before being away from the gym. I also had to start somewhere very small… so that I was still picking away at the workout program while achieving goals I was setting out for myself.

Yesterday I told myself that it was easy enough to check off the “3L of water” goal on the bingo map if I focused on it. I focused on consuming water, tea, and sparkling water throughout the day. Normally I drink two cups of coffee in the morning and then throughout the day drink tea between counselling sessions to ensure I keep my voice throughout the day (but not enough liquids to make me want to pee every five minutes).

As I started off this little goal, I started thinking about when I would use pre and post work out supplements to help me with my work out routine. I decided to start somewhere small by getting my shaker cup out, filling it with water, and then adding pre-workout. Why not change it up a bit?! I knew I would need a bit of flavour to get through my day.

This small routine of drinking pre-workout convinced me to get back on my feet again with the work out I had missed during the week. I got my resistance band out (a beautiful, leopard print band courtesy of Sugifit), and started slow with the workout plan. Some techniques were harder than others (and I was having issues with my knees from not exercising for so long), so I tailored the workout to what was achievable for me.

An hour went by and I finished the work out I had missed throughout the week. I couldn’t believe how quickly I had picked up on some of the movements – and how I accomplished a bigger goal of completing the whole work out instead of just 1/3 of it.

This progress made me step back and think to myself, not only did I achieve my goal of completing the workout out and making up the time I had missed focusing on myself throughout the week, but I also made it to drinking 3L of water that day.

Lesson of the day:

Sometimes the small steps are the ones to focus on because they can lead to greater change.

[alternativecounselling]

One Year

November 2019.

It’s been over a year since my last post. Life has taken over and caused a massive whirlwind in my life. This includes a mixture of both the good and the bad. Life can sometimes move you in uncomfortable directions, but it is all about how to handle the storm.

My fiancé has encouraged me to start writing again. But when would I find the time?! Well, it’s all about creating the time to accomplish the things that you want. Writing has been on the back burner. My life has been chaotic. I have been in survival mode over the past year, trying to navigate the system to ensure that I graduate (at all) to pursue this field. Fiancé– yes. Who could ever imagine this?

A lot has changed within a year, hasn’t it?

I thought it was cute that he told me I should be writing still. He was probably one of the only ones who explored some of my older posts. Looking back, some of the topics have helped. I wouldn’t have landed an amazing relationship if it wasn’t for Whitney Cummings and her book. I also wouldn’t have landed the relationship without Matthew Hussey. I still refer clients who are struggling with romantic relationships to pursue these resources. I highly recommend trying out an activity which I call the “Love List” that was discussed in Whitney’s book “I’m fine… and other lies”. This list changed my life. Here’s an image of my own love list… it helped me to figure out what I was looking for in a partner, what I’m willing to put up with, versus what I am not willing to put up with.

I highly recommend this activity for clients who are struggling with relationships and find themselves trapped in the cycle of attracting temporary people. The list shows you your own boundaries and what they look like. It also helps you to question whether you yourself identify as having the good, neutral, or bad characteristics listed. It helps to put things into perspective and show you areas that need some reflection. When I realized that some of the qualities on my own personal list were some of the bad characteristics… it helped me to work on them and realize I needed to be whole before I could pursue any sort of commitment with anyone.

I have two and a half months left of practicum. I have been counting down the hours (I need approx. 50 more direct client counselling hours to graduate). Week by week, I’ve been taking on as many cases as I can to help people who are struggling through the pandemic. I have nothing but appreciation for this experience, even though it has taken a mental toll on me. I have been stuck in the cycle of survival mode and it won’t go away until I am finished my hours and until I hand in my final assignments.

But I am looking forward to feeling a sense of freedom again. It has been a long six-seven years in the making of pursuing these dreams. What comes next? Plans of writing again, pursuing and creating a podcast and then hopefully creating my own business are in the works.

But first, a break. I can’t wait to truly give myself some space to figure out who I am as a person again. I can’t wait to start thinking about travelling again (even if it’s just within Canada). I can’t wait to buy a home, go camping, and do the simple things of cooking again.

To close this personal self-reflection – a poem I wrote about two years ago that has changed in meaning for me since I had my pen on the paper:

“I realized today

That I am only a bump in the road

a pit stop

where people come and go as they please

Maybe I’m meant to be a lesson

To teach others how to love themselves and others whole.

  Don’t follow in my footsteps – I don’t have a map.

  But being a temporary place for people

is exhausting.

and where i am there is always rain

and i hope you know how to swim

because i sure can’t.

  My dreams consist of being a destination

I hope that someone sees this familiar road

and is drawn towards it

because even though there is always rain

that means that there are always flowers”

  G.K.

[alternativecounselling]

Diet/Nutrition

A couple months ago I had stumbled upon two Instagram influencers who have completely changed the game regarding fitness, well-being, and nutrition. The first I have written about briefly is Mikayla Peterson. Mikayla is the daughter of the well-known psychologist Jordan Peterson who has written the book 12 Rules For Life. This book was one of the most influential pieces of work I have read, as it teaches you to take self-responsibility of your own life.

I love storytelling. In Peterson’s book, he discusses his daughter Mikayla and the difficulties they had with her when she was growing up, from having many health issues, her being extremely medicated, having many surgeries as a teen, and being plagued with an autoimmune disorder. I was interested in her journey, so I started looking into her on Instagram, because there was the controversy with her and her father doing the risqué “carnivore diet”. I originally was interested in looking for sources to combat feelings of depression… as for years I would be extremely depressed. I would be tired, groggy, and feel hopeless. Then I stumbled upon their work.

An interview at the beginning of their journey with experimenting with diet and depression is here:

I started becoming more serious about cutting out unnecessary foods from my diet. I did not know for the longest time that I was experiencing chronic pain – because I never knew what “normal” felt like. I would experience pain in lower regions… and I thought for the longest time I was having health problems such as cervical cancer. There would always be a sharp pain, almost like someone stabbing me from the inside out. Even though results would come back seeming normal… I was living in constant fear. I also knew that I could not handle dairy products, and I was assuming that I was lactose intolerant. I started being more strict on my diet. I cut out dairy completely. I started to slowly feel better. But one day I noticed stretch marks on my stomach. Stretch marks?! I’m only 25 and I’ve never had children! I started to worry. On days I would consume bread and other grains, the stretch marks would reoccur the next morning. So I started cutting out grains. I realized I was permanently bloated from being sensitive to grain products as well. I started feeling better. But then I was craving more and more food. After that, I decided there must be a method to this madness.

I challenged myself to try the carnivore for two weeks. I stuck with steak and chicken, and did not give up certain vegetables such as spinach and red peppers. I would garnish the steak with garlic, onions, and mushrooms (these are all my safe foods 😉 ). After the two weeks – I was hooked. My pain went away. My mood started to improve. I started noticing how great I was feeling. My body naturally started craving two meals per day… and usually later in the day.

I began to do more reading on topics such as diet and intermitted fasting. Greg O’Gallagher is another influencer in the fitness industry from Canada who has knocked the fitness game out of the park for many people. The recent fitness program I have joined of his discusses the benefits of fasting on the body. Fasting is something that tribal groups would naturally have to do in a hunter-gatherer society. There was no such thing as always having a guaranteed meal ready to consume.

In the past, Greg explains that we were told that eating more frequent meals throughout the day was better for you. However, the more frequently one eats, the more their insulin spikes, therefore it is more difficult to burn fat. With intermittent fasting, one can have a big lunch and dinner, and a small snack at night. The method is to push your first meal of the day about four to six hours after you wake up, i.e. around lunch time. Intermittent fasting also boosts growth hormones… which is useful in one’s fitness journey because it aids in fat burning. In women, it increased the growth hormone by 1100%!

One of the BEST videos about the benefits of simple intermittent fasting is here:

Combining the carnivore diet with intermitted fasting has changed my life. On my days off, I usually eat around lunchtime anyways as I am usually busy completing homework or work from home that needs to be done, so I tend to forget to eat for the first 4-5 hours that I am awake. I distract myself with coffee (no sugar, just lions mane mushroom for cognition). COFFEE LIVES WITH THE PLAN OF INTERMITTENT FASTING. Coffee can help to suppress your hunger in the mornings, as can water (and one of my friends have recommended lemon water as well for the extra boost).

Greg’s recommended schedule for eating looks like this:

·Wake up (7 a.m.): Black coffee and water throughout the morning

·Lunch (12-1 p.m.): Lean meat, salad, starchy, filling carbs (I opt out of the carbs)

·Dinner (6-7 p.m.): Your favorite meals; lean meat, veggies, filling carbs (I opt out of the carbs)

·Late night (9-10 p.m.): Dessert

My recommendation is to listen to your body. If something is not going right – start experimenting with changing things up. Diet can have a substantial impact on mood and overall health and well-being.

[alternativecounselling]

Airfry/Meal Prepping

Hi all,

I had a lot of questions recently on what an “airfryer” is and why I’ve been talking about it and using one quite a bit lately. An airfryer is essentially a convection oven – you do not need to use oil in it like you would if you were using a deep fryer. This in theory makes the foods a little more healthy as you are not consuming different types of oils which increase calories intake and make foods greasy.

The odd time I will throw in a tiny bit of coconut oil in the air fryer depending on what type of food I am cooking.

I have experimented with the following so far:

· Carrots (taste like sweet potato fries if you season them right)

· Hashbrowns (honestly were better than how I cook them on the stovetop)

· Mixed frozen veggies (from Costco, which included beets, sweet potato, potatoes, and carrots)

· Perogies (it makes them very crispy and almost like a fried dumpling?!)

·Steak (I had a thick steak that I thought I cooked all the way on the stove top, but the middle was still too raw for my tastes. I ended up throwing it in the airfryer for about 5 minutes and it turned out perfectly!)

What I like about the airfryer is that I can cook up fast meals and walk away from it without any worries. In the evening when I am cooking dinner, I cook my main course (usually steak) and then throw veggies or my side dish in the air fryer while I am doing the steak. By the time I am done cooking on the stove, the food in the airfryer is done and there is less hassle and clean up to do. It also feels like less of a burden if I want to make my own homemade chips instead of buying them from the grocery store.

In my last video post, I discussed meal prepping briefly. Right now I am attempting to eat only meat and veggies in my diet (usually chicken at lunch time, steak in the evening). I have been having issues with what I suspect is my gut biome (I was in chronic pain again last night and this morning, after a weekend of eating mostly fast food with my family and friends). This morning I did not have the energy to cook breakfast – so I threw some cut up potatoes in the airfryer and it was a life saver.

Right now there is a sale on a 1.5L model from Giant Tiger for about $60 after tax (which is the cheapest that I have seen airfryers go for). I couldn’t find ratings on the Betty Crocker model, however the one I have is fantastic and I have no regrets investing in it. The website for this model is here: https://www.gianttiger.com/product/841737.do

The 1.5L option is perfect for one person – I wish I would have had this thing as a student during my undergrad program.

If anyone has any questions about airfrying, send me a message and I can do my best to share my secrets with meal prepping and planning.

[alternativecounselling]

Elimination Diet

Hello everyone,

This is my first video on the importance of diet and how it can impact mood and well-being, and it’s a little bit of a personal journey on how I got to this point of realizing how diet can affect everything. This video discusses my experiences of how changing my diet has changed my mood in just TWO WEEKS.

I am hoping that over time I can get to a point where I cut out “bad” foods completely. This is a huge goal that will take time and commitment. I realized that when I fall off the healthy eating train is on weekends when I go out with family or friends and enjoy meals.

I’m trying to figure out how to kick certain cravings (and I feel like these cravings creep up just at the threshold point where I am about to succeed in saying “no” completely to junk foods). I think the biggest motivator for me has been watching Mikayla’s journey of well-being and taking notes on what works and what does not work. I may also try fasting at some point to see if this helps to reset my gut biome and to see if my tolerance for certain foods changes.

Here is a portion of my dieting journey and the reasons why I decided to take control of this aspect of my life:

One of the original postings of Mikayla’s journey is below “Don’t Eat That”:

Please send me some feedback on how changing your own diet has affected your physical well-being.

Cheers,

[alternativecounselling]

Gravity/Weighted Blankets

Years ago, I had problems sleeping and would be up with insomnia despite my efforts to sleep. I would make sure to turn all my devices off early, set myself a sleep schedule, would not drink coffee throughout the day, would use essential oils, and tried meditating before bed. I would drink chamomile tea and find myself still laying wide awake for hours, not being able to sleep after all of the effort I would put in.

After going through this process for a long time, I finally had a “talk” with myself about why I needed to shut my brain off and get some rest. Relentlessly I fought with myself questioning why I couldn’t sleep: was it a lack of security? Did I not feel safe in my own home? Why couldn’t I just “let go” of the control I was attempting to have when I struggled to sleep?

Finally after a ton of self-exploration, I discovered that there were a number of reasons I couldn’t sleep, and part of the problem was feeling a lack of security. I couldn’t handle the fact of falling asleep because I was fearful of someone breaking into my home. After many years of convincing myself otherwise, I finally had to “train” my brain that nothing bad would happen to me while I was asleep.

Years later, I ended up having a roommate for a couple of months. This transition actually made me feel much better and have a better sense of security. I slept much easier knowing I wasn’t the only one who was in the household in case of an emergency or in case of an intruder.

After they had moved out, I was back at square one of not having a proper sleep schedule. It was difficult transitioning to the thought of living alone again. I did not have a job, so I was making my own schedule around school.

Now that I’ve been transitioning into starting a new job on Monday, I realized how poor my sleep habits were again. I tried for a couple of days to go to bed early and wake up early. I could wake up early without a problem, but felt burn out because I would spend all night tossing and turning.

Finally, I invested in a weighted blanket. I have read about them as they became “trendy” at the beginning of the year to aid in a lack of sleep from depression and anxiety. Ackerley, Badre, and Olausson (2015) did a study which found that when participants used a weighted blanket for insomnia, sleep time increased, and there was a decrease in movements of the participant.

Weighted blankets aid in a form of therapy called deep pressure therapy. Deep pressure on the body can increase the release of serotonin in the brain “the happy chemical” which makes us feel good. Many researchers believe that this is due to the feeling of “being held” by the blanket – a component of “nurturing” that people get as newborns and as young children. This can increase the sense of security one has. Weighted blankets are also used in some hospitals and care homes for many different disorders such as autism, ADHD, anxiety, and even for chronic pain.

After much research, I managed to find a blanket and duvet cover for $130 after tax on amazon. The weighted blanket itself usually needs a cover because you cannot machine wash it and it is either “spot clean” or “hand wash” only. I needed the cover because of a lack of trust with my companion kitty. I was impressed as it arrived within a day of ordering it. As a consumer, the best type of blanket should be about 10% of your body weight.

I look forward to testing out this product and hopefully get some more zzz’s.

Reference:

Ackerley R, Badre G, Olausson H (2015) Positive Effects of a Weighted Blanket on Insomnia. J Sleep Med Disord 2(3): 1022.

[alternativecounselling]

Healing I

*Was written July 27… many things have changed since then.

Lately I’ve taken some time to do a social media detox which has been very eye opening for me. It is easy to get caught up in scrolling through fake news, advertisements, and seeing others around you posting about their “happiness”. Some of these values are called “junk values” thanks to the author Johann Hari, who uses the term to explain that it contributes to making us “mentally sick”.

Here is a short clip on “junk values”:

As a student and researcher, I was constantly on my phone scrolling through the unlimited amount of information, which became an addiction. I knew it was getting out of hand when I started being in denial about the amount of time spent on my device. I watched a podcast of Joe Rogan and Whitney Cummings (#1328), and Cummings suggests changing the settings on your devices to black and white because when your phone has the original colour settings on your display, the colours are addictive to look at and it keeps you “hooked”. I attempted this for about four days and noticed a huge decline in the usage of my device.

I became deeply depressed on where I was in life. My job ended in April, and when I attempted to start a new one, I realized it wasn’t the right fit for me. I went to numerous job interviews but nothing was reaching my interest or contributed to a “meaningful” cause.

School became my number one priority, which was not entirely a good thing. I would constantly be ruminating over having lower marks, I could barely type essays (and the ones that I did type, good lord they were horrible), and I was walking around with “brain fog”, I could barely comprehend what was going on.

I met someone and I started living on what I call “autopilot”. I wasn’t myself at all, and I started to become more open to criticism, accepting any type of critique but not putting my foot down and saying “no”. I stopped eating because I wanted to look more “fit” at the gym. I also stopped sleeping consistently because of not eating and being hungry at night, and I would wake up in the middle of the night depressed. I lost who I was entirely, and this was because my core confidence was beaten down so low. I started having suicidal thoughts, contributed to writing my suicide letter (after numerous revisions), and would walk around pondering what the best method was to end everything.

Nobody is perfect, which is a hard concept to grasp as a perfectionist. I constantly strive to do things properly, go above and beyond, and work the hardest that I can. This is in every aspect of my life regarding work, school, and relationships. But once you put all of your energy into everything and everyone else, it leaves you empty. How was I supposed to become a potential counsellor if I could barely take care of myself? How was I supposed to take care of others if I couldn’t take care of myself?

I was very empty. My core confidence was gone, and I wasn’t the woman I once was. I could see it in my face when I looked in the mirror. When other people would tell me I looked great, I would start to tear up because I felt the exact opposite. I even started crying when I would go to the gym because I would ruminate over how much better my body could be.

I started to realize how necessary it is to be selfish with your own time and with what you want to do. I started to realize that when I was more confident and believed in myself, I started getting somewhere and things started happening in a positive way for me. When I was depressed, it seemed like everything would go wrong.

Healing is a very personal journey. Healing for me involves grief – mostly grief over losing the person I once was. I am slowly starting to bounce back. I cried for three days straight. I started forcing myself to eat, even if I did not want to. I started trying out a sleep schedule to get my system back on track. I even ended up deactivating Facebook and Instagram and have felt amazing about this choice. At first it was a difficult decision to make, but after about three days I have never felt better because I don’t have the pressure of comparing myself and my success to others.

I also started to realize my self-worth. The right people find you once you accept and love yourself fully. When I started focusing on “me” again, saying no, and recognizing that I had completely been led around by what I would call a “narcissist”, who would constantly leave me questioning my self worth.

This person would lead me on and then disappear. They would make comments about other women to make me jealous, and once I did become more insecure from this… I was to blame for being jealous. They also did not take any interest in my hobbies, music, writing, or friend groups. They claimed I wouldn’t open up… yet they would not ask any questions that implied that they were interested. They were not there for me as a friend… or when I needed someone the most. To make a long story short… once I was separated from them I realized the control they tried to impede on me to make themselves feel better. Once they left, I started feeling better by not having them around.

The underlying lesson I learned was from one of my favorite life coaches Matthew Hussey. Unrequited love is a turn off. Why do we romanticize when someone treats us like shit?

Build your own castle. Others can help you build this castle too. However, if someone isn’t there building a castle with you... it’s like having a contractor that doesn’t show up for work. They aren’t putting the effort in and it doesn’t lead to a solid foundation.

[alternativecounselling]

Solution-focused therapy

“If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”

“Once you know what works, do more of it”

“If it’s not working, do something different”

- de Shazer and Berg, 1995.

The past little while I’ve become more interested in solution-focused brief therapy, which is a here and now method of therapy which is fairly straightforward and takes around 3-5 sessions (Sperry & Sperry, 2012). Solution-focused therapy focuses on immediate concerns, it emphasizes solutions, and it demonstrates that clients have strengths and resources to help them solve their problems (Sperry & Sperry, 2012). Solution-focused therapy is like the opposite of cognitive behavioural therapy (in my eyes, at least) because CBT therapy focuses on the negative automatic thoughts, beliefs, and schemas, and it focuses on “fixing” the client’s problem cognitions – while solution-focused therapy lets the client choose the goals and become more emotionally resilient by giving them the courage and optimism that they have the power to solve their own problems.

I had the opportunity of accidentally attempting this method of therapy in one of my practical application skills through my MACP program with another student who was playing the role of the client. This person expressed how they were feeling overwhelmed by many things in life including work, moving into a brand new house, and her dog become old and ill. I conversed with her and did not realize I was making much progress by talking with her until one of the other students mentioned that she started smiling near the end of the session, and that I had empowered her by listing off some of the strengths she presented and by helping her to problem-solve ways to cope with her busy life.

I was shocked at how effective this method of treatment is – until I realized I also have a friend who unconsciously uses this whenever we get into our “deep talks” about life. I couldn’t understand why meeting with this person would leave me with an overwhelming sense of mastery in life, until I realized that this person constantly helps me to reflect the things that I have accomplished and reminds me why I am on the path that I am on.

Kim and Franklin (2015) also discuss how positive language that is used in therapy is a vehicle used for change. The more emphasis used on positive and optimistic views, the more hopeful clients become and the more self-confidence and self-mastery occurs. This reminds me of how positive thinking shapes the neuroplasticity of the brain. When individuals are depressed, the brain’s functioning changes, and mood, memory and decision making can shrink with depression. But, one can combat this by thinking more positively.

Here is some homework for the week: view this short self-help video to practice positive thinking and document your thoughts every night/morning and see how you feel after a week!

Positive Thinking Neuroplasticity Brain Chemistry

References:

Kim, J. S., & Franklin, C. (2015).  Understanding emotional change in solution-focused brief therapy: Facilitating positive emotions. Best Practices in Mental Health: An International Journal, 11(1), 25–41. Retrieved from https://search.ebscohost.com/login.aspx?direct=true&AuthType=url,cookie,ip,uid&db=a9h&AN=103534839

Sperry, L., & Sperry, J. (2012). Case conceptualization. New York, NY: Taylor & Francis.

[alternativecounselling]

Bee Propolis/CBD

Hello all!

The past couple of days I have been trying to fight a flu that came on which resulted in my whole body aching, having ongoing fever, a slight sore throat, and major migraines.

One problem with my own body growing up was developing tonsillitis or strep throat regularly because of still having my tonsils in. My family doctor was more of a naturopathic doctor, and I had to fight to finally go for a surgery when I was in university to have my tonsils removed. Usually they do this at a young age because the body heals faster compared to when one is an adult. However, I waited until I finally got brave enough to insist on seeing a specialist. It took me a week or two to recover, however I do not get sick as often because of the surgery.

However, one downside to this has been the fact that my body has developed an immunity to certain antibiotics. When I develop a virus, it takes my body much longer to heal and doctors are hesitant on prescribing antibiotics as it is hard on the gut and liver.

Last night, I noticed the signs of the virus occurring. I immediately decided to take action and try to prevent my symptoms from getting worse. I wanted to share with you two amazing products which have helped me this far to cope.

The first, which has made a drastic difference in the migraines and body aches is a product called Bee Propolis. Bee propolis is made from the sap on needle-leaved trees or evergreens. When the bees combine the sap with their own discharges and beeswax, they create a sticky, greenish-brown product used as a coating to build their hives. When I started taking this product, I would put it in tea. However, the product is so sticky, it would actually coat and stain any surfaces it was on. I now just directly ingest it without mixing it, even though the taste is pretty disgusting.

Pasupuleti, Sammugam, Remsh, and Gan (2017) explain that bee propolis has been reported to have various health benefits related to gastrointestinal disorders, allergies, and gynecological, oral, and dermatological problems. They also explain that propolis and its extracts have numerous applications in treating various diseases due to its antiseptic, anti-inflammatory, antioxidant, antibacterial, antimycotic, antifungal, antiulcer, anticancer, and immunomodulatory properties. Since I started taking this product, my throat has not been as sore, I do not have a runny nose, and my migraines have been minimal.

The second product I started taking has been CBD oil for pain management. Reiss (2010) found that cannabinoids are profoundly anti-inflammatory and impair many Ca2+-dependent enzyme systems which are central to inflammatory and cell-autonomous antiviral responses. Usually this product is the one that I regularly take with tea, however lately I use it under the tongue for a faster response.

I highly recommend checking into both these products to have in your medicine cabinet to help with healing and inflammation.

References:

Pasupuleti, V. R., Sammugam, L., Ramesh, N., & Gan, S. H. (2017). Honey, Propolis, and Royal Jelly: A Comprehensive Review of Their Biological Actions and Health Benefits. Oxidative medicine and cellular longevity, 2017, 1259510. doi:10.1155/2017/1259510

Reiss CS. Cannabinoids and Viral Infections. Pharmaceuticals (Basel). 2010 Jun 9;3(6):1873-1886. doi: 10.3390/ph3061873. PubMed PMID: 20634917; PubMed Central PMCID: PMC2903762.

[alternativecounselling]

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy – What is it?

CBT therapy is a method of attempting to change dysfunctional emotions, behaviors, and thoughts. It helps to change automatic negative thoughts into more reasonable ones and can help to build emotional resilience.

I did not know how important this type of therapy was until I underwent an experiment on myself. This experiment is on-going, and I hope to change some of the patterns that I have contributed to unknowingly. Sometimes we outwardly display behaviours that are linked to our inner thoughts, but they may be unconscious to us until someone points them out.

There is a wonderful woman who works at the gym I go to. We see each other almost everyday and we stop and chat and catch up on whatever is new. But she noticed something that I didn’t when we would carry on a conversation.

When greeting each other, we would do the routine “How are you today?” and I would always be stuck in the rut of saying “I’m not too bad”.

Not too bad? What’s going on to make it bad?

I stopped and realized from this woman that my responses are always semi-negative. I didn’t even realize how important the language I was using is to set your own mood, appearance, and outlook in life. I didn’t realize I was using this type of language either.

I also realized that I took on this line from listening to others around me who say the exact same line.

So now, I’m holding myself accountable to try and change this behaviour. The woman at the gym and I talk about it almost every time we see each other now. I always pause and change the line to “Things are going good” or “Today has been busy, but in a good way!”.

I have mentioned this to one of my family members as well and we try to hold each other accountable because we realized we both say this line consistently. Once it happens, we both laugh and point it out so that hopefully next time it will change.

Why are these little words so important?

It sets the tone for your core thoughts and patterns in life. It determines how you see yourself, the people around you, and the world. If you are using negative language (even if it’s accidental!) it shapes how you are interacting with others.

Now my lovely readers, I challenge you to try to find one of these negative patterns and recognize them whenever you contribute to it. Get in the mindset of changing that pattern. The first step is just to recognize it and think about it before changing it.

[alternativecounselling]

Dream Interpretation

Over the past week, I’ve been discussing Gestalt therapy with colleagues in my M.A. program and the importance of dream interpretation in therapy. Gestalt therapy focuses on the here-and-now and has major roots in the concept of awareness. It is the belief that individuals have the right to be different or unique, which is highly valued. Dreams help with conflict resolution, memory consolidation, and mood regulation.

Ginger (2018) discusses biological findings of dreams such as:

-Cold-blooded animals never dream, but their nervous system self-regenerates throughout their life (permanent neurogenesis).

-Other animals are temporarily deaf and paralyzed during dreams. Cows dream three times as much in stables compared to in fields because of the security they feel.

- Humans spend 20% of their sleep in dreams. The fetus dreams in utero from the 7th month after conception. The pregnant mother has twice the dreams she normally would to accompany the child in neurogenesis.

Also discussed by Ginger (2018) are some techniques counsellors can help the client to use in dream therapy such as:

- Do nothing (the dream itself can have natural therapeutic function)

-Recount the dream (this can bring it to consciousness)

-Interpret the dream (with the use of symbols, interpretation through association of symbols)

-Amplify key sentences from the dream, the most meaningful parts of it

-Ask the dreamer to finish the dream, showing the client they have control over the outcome of the dream (bringing thoughts in the unconscious to the conscious).

There is also a cultural dimension to dream therapy.

One of my colleagues mentioned that in the belief system in West Africa, they believe in juju (physical objects, amulets, good and bad luck) and curses.

Another mentioned that in Arab-Muslim culture, dreams are a way of knowing the past, present and predicting the future. They are a type of prophecy that can help in decision making. Dreams are the supernatural gifts that are handed down from one generation to the next.

Finally, I was pondering the origins of dreamcatchers. The Native American Ojibwe tribe created them to be a talisman which would catch the bad dreams and protect the dreamer. The dreamcatcher is a circle because it represents the circle of life. The spider-web-like structure is traditionally made from red willow branches and wrapped with leather and sinew. Once sunlight hit the catcher, it would destroy the bad dreams.

Happy Sunday!

References:

Ginger, S. (2018). Gestalt Therapy: The Art of Contact. Retrieved from https://books.google.ca/books?id=ZnlTDwAAQBAJ&pg=PT58&lpg=PT58&dq=gestalt dream therapy&source=bl&ots=9IJqzEDexV&sig=ACfU3U0oxrk8VHCQHrsHmiEw0TLSaiY2kw&hl=en&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjspOS_ouDhAhUBnOAKHYaDD1s4FBDoATAHegQICRAB#v=onepage&q=gestalt dream therapy&f=false

[alternativecounselling]

Colour Psychology

The use of colour psychology is important for everyday life. It is used all around us in marketing, when you are doing home renovations, buying a new car and picking out new furniture. It’s even apparent when you are getting dressed in the morning.

I have talked briefly about colour before, however it is something that has popped into my mind once again because we can use colour to create joy in our lives.

Ingrid Fetell Lee discusses in her TED talk the importance of colour and how it can create joy which leads to happiness here:

Each colour can symbolize a different mood or feeling. Here are some common “feelings” associated with different colours:

·         White: purity, innocence, cleanliness, neutrality, can signify mourning

·         Black: authority, power, strength, intelligence, death or mourning

·         Gray: neutral, timeless

·         Red: love, romance, warmth, energetic, intense

·         Orange: happy, energetic, warm, change

·         Yellow: happiness, laughter, warmth, intense

·         Green: natural, cool, health, harmony, fertility

·         Blue: calm, serene, focused

·         Purple: royal, wisdom, spiritual, respect, mysterious

·         Brown: stability, security, natural, organic

·         Pink: romance, love, gentle

As Lee discusses, we can create joy in our community with the use of colour. I know that during the spring time I have witnessed “pops” of colour in the community that make me feel a little brighter and happier.

Some examples from my community are:

The new children’s wing of RUH hospital in Saskatoon (I’m loving this!!!)

Last year one of the statues on Broadway had some knitted colour that was added:

The painted rocks near Broadway and the river (One of my favorite go-to spots):

Ceiling tiles at RUH are creative and add some joy to the different rooms:

Someone recently knitted this dream catcher art near my place and it’s added some colour to the bland overpass:

University of Saskatchewan Pride sidewalk art:

How can you add joy to your community?

[alternativecounselling]

Self- Responsibility

It’s been a couple months since I have posted material, primarily because I’ve been working towards obtaining some certificates in ASIST (Applies Suicide Intervention Skills Training), and MHFA (Mental Health First Aid), and also because the material I have been covering in course work hasn’t been very relevant to a “human” experience.

One topic that keeps reoccurring in my mind has been the term “self responsibility” regarding mental health and creating meaning and purpose in life. Jordan Peterson is a wonderful clinical psychologist who has posted lectures which are relevant to the human experience.

Why is this important?

I believe a lot of people are unhappy – and in turn they turn towards different coping mechanisms to deal with the issues they experience. They don’t directly face whatever they are experiencing and embrace the experience for what it is at face value. Peterson holds the view that much of mental illness can be avoided and these types of disorders stem from the experience of stress and conflict.

When conflict is not dealt with internally, physical symptoms start to manifest externally which creates the mental illness or health issues that arise. Counselling is very useful to help individuals externalize their feelings, which in turn is why it is so successful.

Sure – there is the biological aspect of disorder which we can measure and treat – and sure there are people who benefit from the use of SRIs to improve mood and functioning. There is no denying this. This can be due to genetics and the familial line.

However, much of mental illness all comes down to self-responsibility. If we are feeling depressed, unhappy, unfulfilled in life, we must hold ourselves accountable for our mood. It is only us that can change that feeling. Nobody else can hold that responsibility for you.

Now, the question is how do we dig ourselves out of a negative loop of depression, sadness, anxiety, worry, and even trauma?

Creating purpose and meaning in life is a large factor in well-being. Jordan Peterson discusses how creating a routine can help in stabilizing your mood and life. If you do not have purpose or meaning, this is when individuals tend to go downhill. Self responsibility and taking on responsibility is also a method of creating meaning in life.

I think this second video is applicable to both men and women for responsibility and meaning, even though Peterson focuses on men.

Create your own luck

--G

[alternativecounselling]

Inlight Therapy

A couple months ago I had met a customer of mine who oddly enough was a counsellor and came into the store I work for to browse around. We started conversing and it turns out that he opened up a men's shelter and owned a couple different homes to help support individuals who suffered from mental illness/disorder. We were discussing different new techniques that are used to aid in biological healing of disorder. He told me about a new tool used for treatment which is called "Inlight therapy", which involves using polychromatic LED light technology. Inlight therapy involves using polychromatic wavelengths of light with varied pulsed rates. Different light pads are placed on the head for example, and they promote circulation and movement of blood throughout the body. This therapy reduces pain and promotes cell movement which increases oxygenation in the blood.

He explained to me that it is very expensive to get the equipment but it can be useful, especially in a men's shelter -- where aggressive traits in individuals tend to affect men in the shelter, and they therefore "act out" by destroying things in the home and causing damage to the residence. He was hopeful that the government would assist in funding for it. I find this type of therapy to be very interesting to learn about because of the relation to brain plasticity. Different light therapy can promote movement of cells in the brain, which therefore can affect brain plasticity and "smoothen" out problem areas that have a lack of blood flow.

The Inlight Medical website lists the following benefits of using inlight therapy: Many people with symptoms of pain or impaired circulation associated with the following conditions experience positive results from using polychromatic light therapy:

Joint pain: neck, back, knuckles, elbow, knee, wrist

Inflammation and swelling

Bone fractures

Bruises

Burns

Non-healing wounds

Peripheral neuropathy

Tight muscles

Mood Disorders

Skin conditions

Hopefully in the future more research will be done for this tool in aiding for treatment options.

References:

https://www.inlightmedical.com/

[alternativecounselling]

New Year Resolutions

In previous years, I was never the type of person to buy into writing and setting goals or New Year resolutions. In my eyes, it seemed like a burden to take into consideration or plan out what I wanted in life. However, setting goals is important to help to promote well-being, satisfaction in life, and to help challenge yourself to become a better person.

I find that writing out lists of goals, grocery lists, and to-do lists daily helps to prioritize the important tasks that need to be accomplished, and there is a sense of pride and satisfaction when you get to strike off that goal off of the list.

I was given a day planner as a gift this past summer and it had a section on “goals for this year” which included the following categories:

·         Personal growth

·         Health and fitness

·         Work/School

·         Relationships

·         Fun and adventure

Setting a goal (even if it was a small one) made me have a sense of pride at the end of this year. Seeing the goals that I thought were too large to accomplish and being able to reflect on the challenges and setbacks made me more grateful for everything I experienced this year. It also helped to see what I feel like I am currently lacking in life (the big two for me are fun and adventure, and relationships), but I know that this is something I can work on next year. It has also demonstrated the level of growth I have gone through despite the setbacks that have occurred.

It is important to recognize that it takes about four months to change a behavior to make it a routine.

Below is a photo of my day planner which has a section in it for 2019 which helps to frame the smaller goals to accomplish.

 Finally, the following TED talk discusses how it is important to keep your goals private instead of sharing them with others:

[alternativecounselling]

Health Benefits of Exercise

One topic I haven’t covered on my blog has been exercise and its effects on well-being. The past two months have been excruciatingly busy for me in my personal life: I have had family members who have been extremely sick, I’ve been crunching to meet deadlines in my masters program, and I’ve been picking up extra shifts at work to help pay for my lifestyle. I would originally go to the gym a minimum of three days a week – however I took a hiatus because of the amount of stress I was under. The optimal time is right in the morning, EARLY, because it sets the mood for your day.

I started noticing negative effects immediately. First, my moods shifted and I would procrastinate more on things that had to be done. Then, over a course of a week or two, my mood went from being on top of the world to wanting to give up on everything in life. Woah. I started eating ungodly amounts of bad food – where as on a usual day my diet would be steady and I would drink more water. My confidence level took a huge plummet, which was the most painful side effect I noticed in myself.

So now, with this self-experiment I’ve realized how important it is to maintain physical activity.

A lot of people are scared of starting something new such as going to the gym. When I first started going, I went with one of my family members which kept me motivated to go, because it was a way to look forward to being at the gym. Then over time, I started going more often and going by myself once I was more comfortable with using the different machines. It takes time to develop a habit (I believe I read an article which stated 90 days, so three months of routine). Once you are done working through this grace period, it becomes something to look forward to every day. It takes three seconds of bravery to try something new.

Warburton, Nicol, and Bredin (2006) explain that a lack of physical activity is correlated with chronic disease and morbidity. Regular physical activity can help to prevent many chronic diseases such as cardiovascular disease, diabetes, cancer, hypertension, obesity, depression and osteoporosis. Physical activity also helps to promote healthy psychological functioning in individuals.

I am no expert WHATSOEVER with going to the gym. But this is my personal routine that I use to get a full body work out. I do this for a minimum of three times per week.

Pre-work out powder: Revolution Nutrition Whey Dessert (Matcha, and I’m currently trying out S’mores)

My routine:

To warm up:

15-30 minutes of cardio (I use the elliptical because I find it less intimidating compared to treadmills)

Stretching:

I use a mat and stretch my legs, arms, hips, and then delve into doing 50 sit ups to keep my heart pumping.

Rest of the work out:

50 squats

Row machine for 1-2 songs on my playlist, depending on how I feel or how sore I am that day

Leg press – 10-15 reps (I work my way up in weight by 10 lbs until I reach my limit)

Assisted Pull up/Chin dip Machine:

I pick the amount of weight I know I won’t hurt myself with There are three different hand bars to use on the machines at my gym, so I do 10 pull ups for each hand bar, for a total of 30 pull ups. I also do 30 “dips”. I split it up though and do 10 pull ups, then 10 dips, then 10 pull ups on the new hand bars, then 10 dips..

Finally, I do leg extensions, 10-15 per amount of weight going up.

Post work out powder: Vega Sport Protein (Mocha flavour)

Like I said, I am not expert at “going to the gym” or working out. Sometimes you will feel silly or awkward when starting out at the gym. However, over time your confidence will build and you will overall feel happier, more grateful, and more satisfied in life. Plus, sometimes you will make new friends along the way which helps motivate you to keep going and building on your social life and becoming more involved with “community”.

Cheers,

References:

Warburton, D. E., Nicol, C. W., & Bredin, S. S. (2006). Health benefits of physical activity: the evidence. CMAJ : Canadian Medical Association journal = journal de l'Association medicale canadienne, 174(6), 801-9.

[alternativecounselling]

Backsliding

It has been awhile since my last posting because of being busy in life and having a series of events pop up that has made me ignore my own introspection. I’ve been taking care of everyone around me lately, except one of the most important ones: myself.

This is a personal note that I hope others can learn from.

The past few weeks I have decided to hide myself away from the “outside world”. I became severely depressed, not wanting to burden anyone else with the feelings that I’ve conjured up inside of myself. I distanced myself away from others, not hanging out with others, barely talking to people, and finalizing this by taking a social media break off certain platforms.

What happened?

Well, first of all my emotions have been lingering over me because I haven’t had the proper outlet to externalize them. One thing I’ll never forget is how one of my professors explained that if individuals do not externalize their feelings – they bubble up in negative ways internally, or externally with breakdowns and disorder.

Nobody is perfect.

I stopped going to the gym because I haven’t had the time to commit to going because it is harder for me to get places during the winter time since I do not plate my car. I bought a boxing bag to practice on at home, however I kept re-injuring myself constantly from “over doing” it. I also quit writing because of not having enough time to work on homework. I wasn’t “externalizing” my feelings at all.

Reading and writing about self-injurious behaviour for one of my projects started to bother me. I was procrastinating for over a week about one article in particular – because I unconsciously knew there were feelings I haven’t dealt with in this subject. In the past, to cope with stress, anxiety, and depression, I would cut my arms to externalize my feelings. Self injurious behaviour can occur as a reinforcement or punishment to prevent the individual from making mistakes. Reading about it made me feel guilty. I couldn’t understand why. But then I realized – wait a second… I’m contributing to self-injurious behaviours right now without even realizing it.

To cope with my feelings, I’ve been avoiding important self-care tips. I tend to put off eating without even realizing that I’m doing it, to be more “productive”. I also drink more coffee than I do water which also is self-sabotage on a biological level. But then at night, I binge eat and sit in front of the TV feeling guilty for my behaviour. Huh.

I was watching an episode of New Girl and it was an episode where the main character and one of her roommates come up with the term “backsliding”, which is going back to old habits or behaviours even if they know that they are going to get hurt from it. Self sabotage. It didn’t occur to me that I was currently backsliding in my own life.

I was also backsliding on the social relationships aspect of my life. I deeply feel as if I have codependency issues that I still need to work through. I live by myself and spend a lot of time alone, but deep down I know that I enjoy being around others and feeling love. My problem is, I get attached to individuals too fast, too deep, and too passionately which is also a form of self-sabotage. I never had the opportunity to learn what a “healthy” relationship was. Domestic violence can deeply fragment what “healthy” should look like to someone who has gone through it.

I ended up backsliding once again, giving my attention to individuals who do not necessarily deserve the attention. I ended up getting hurt, and have been experiencing feelings of grief over how badly I ended up hurting myself through this process. Actions speak louder than words do: and that’s something that I forgot along the way. Disinterest from others = closure.

I was obsessively watching American Horror Story Apocalypse every night. The show fascinates me on a psychological level. I couldn’t understand why I had this deep obsession, or empathy for the main antagonist in the show which is the anti-christ. I even started dreaming about the show. I realized that I saw part of myself in the character of the show. The part that was seeking nurturing myself.

Spoiler alert:

The development of “Michael” was a mixture of biopsychosocial factors: biologically, psychologically, and socially he became the anti-christ because of traumas he had experienced over time. He grew up without a father or mother. He had tendencies to destroy or kill things, which wasn’t reinforced early on. He grew from a child to a young man over night, which I suspect would mess with his hormones and biology. His grandmother raised him, but was cruel to him and eventually ended up committing suicide. He found her body, and was told by a ghost that she did it because of him. Throughout the show he goes through a lack of social support or nurturing, which in the end only makes him more bitter and focus on destroying the world to “recreate” something better.

I realized that the antichrist in the show could have been prevented early on if he had the right amount of nurturing. He turned bitter because he was lost and misunderstood by everyone around him.

The moral of this story is that self-care is extremely important to practice on a daily basis in order to prevent backsliding. I will be going back to the gym as soon as I can, eating more consistently, meditating, and spending quality time with friends who are positive influences in my life in order to take responsibility of myself and nurture myself back to having a good sense of confidence and well-being.