[hilarioushumorfromouterspace]

[alisonzai]

[popokko-deactivated20210315]

peeling a clementine is so easy. it comes so naturally. its inviting… the clementine WANTS to be peeled. its melancholic, sanguine… but an orange? whats an orange but a nuisance… the orange torments and mocks with its brute strength. it exists only to create chaos. next time you decide to indulge in a citrus delight, heed my word. choose the clementine 

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

No one is supposed to enjoy February. You’re not even supposed to think about it. It’s a practice in stoicism. mind your own business and just let it pass. Lock your doors and windows. Speak in quiet tones

[biggest-gaudiest-poltergeist]

Do Not Look February In The Eye

[softwaring]

look at this google review i saw lmfaooo

[stupidpetface]

[maplebungus-deactivated20221118]

fucking GET you

[lumpyjuice]

[veggiedaddy]

[horhardaho-deactivated20180622]

[zagreus]

this will be my go-to excuse from now on

[memewhore]

[i-smell-ice-cream]

[whatthebec]

[tonyhawksproskaterfour-deactiva]

[accras]

A woodpecker hitched a ride on the side of this man’s car during a rainy day in Chicago.

[uniquely-khaotic-deactivated201]

Cute but I woulda lost it 😂

[lazysundrops]

Lmfaooooo the way the bird closed its eyes when he said “you’re beautiful” had me weak.

[smokingpixie]

I would have felt so blessed if was chilling on my arm

[ororomunroedontpullout]

*in a thick Chicago accent* “Welcome to Chicago”

[mythic-weapon]

people: filled with sin dirt: filled with worms ( a good and righteous thing)

[elchicodelascumbias]