utena & anthy doodles
$LAYYYTER

⁂

★
🪼

pixel skylines
YOU ARE THE REASON
almost home
No title available
Sweet Seals For You, Always
h
i don't do bad sauce passes
One Nice Bug Per Day
Monterey Bay Aquarium
hello vonnie
sheepfilms

祝日 / Permanent Vacation

blake kathryn

if i look back, i am lost
Today's Document
2025 on Tumblr: Trends That Defined the Year

seen from United States
seen from Belgium
seen from Malaysia

seen from Hong Kong SAR China

seen from Colombia

seen from Indonesia

seen from Argentina
seen from United States
seen from Brazil

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Brazil

seen from Netherlands

seen from United States
seen from Netherlands

seen from India
seen from United Kingdom
seen from Lithuania

seen from Russia
seen from Germany
@anthycoded
utena & anthy doodles
i laid my head in her lap and she started rubbing and scratching it in gentle rhythmic circles and within minutes i was on the verge of falling asleep. i groggily looked up and said “this feels so nice, i almost fell asleep” and she looked down and said “i did a bunch of research into scalp stimulation and found the most comforting speeds, forces, and patterns, and then i practiced on different girls until i had dialed in an effective technique”
t4t because you just dont get this sort of autistically optimized treatment from cis girls
a rushed Indian anthy piece
those who are cringe… are free
I feel like not enough people realize that people under enormous strain act really really fucking Weird
If someone is doing things that don't make Sense, try to understand that it is entirely possible that their brain is probably under an enormous weight and fracturing under the pressure. People who have been stabbed will sometimes talk a circle around the fact that they've been stabbed because stress and shock prevent you from recognizing the distress you are in and what you need to do to seek help for it. PTSD will do this also. You will find yourself repeatedly jamming a bag of frozen fruit into the same spot in the freezer where it doesn't fit and keeps falling, over and over and over, focused on nothing but that bag. You will decide that a beanbag chair is 10000% necessary to your life. You will lose your entire shit because you stubbed your toe on a table and that means the whole setup of your furniture is wrong. These are largely harmless examples. People under strain will also hurt themselves and others. Cornered animals bite. And it doesn't heal the bite to go "Hey, are you okay?" But it might get you to an animal that stops biting, so you can start to heal. And before you had an animal that bit, you probably had an animal that kept doing shit you didn't understand as stress signals
when s1 Claudia tells Louis that lestat’s love is “a small box he keeps you in” and theb s2 Claudia says that Bruce crammed her under the floorboards and told her he loved her “before during and after” …. brb I have to go to the suicide store
i fear i peaked here
"i've got no qualms about it" meanwhile i'm over here making qualm chowder
Diagram I made to explain the importance of me having a hyperfixation at all times
Many people seem to have the misunderstanding that if one doesn’t have a hyperfixation, they will have more time to think normal thoughts. This however, is incorrect. The amount of normal thoughts thunk by the average neurodivergent stays relatively the same, it’s the amount of bad thoughts thunk that changes depending on the intensity of ones’ hyperfixation. Yes I am a neuroscientist trust me
Nothing quite like the smell of a cramped tent with 3 teens and a cat on a summer morning 🏕️
Absolutely necessary battle stance
(ft hearing loss yusuke)
1st sem to 3rd sem fem akeshu (congrats on your butch glow up akechi)
as a big fan of we have always lived in the castle, do you have any thoughts regarding uncle julian? 👀
oh lots….. he’s essentially a blackwood woman without being a woman. “blackwood woman” is a title reserved for the wives of the men who inherit the blackwood estate; a woman moves in (with her most valuable possessions) and then the house swallows her up and a new blackwood woman eventually moves in to take her place. the system obviously gets taken apart when merricat kills thomas, who was going to inherit the estate (thereby forcing her and constance out of the house), along with the rest of her family. but who unwittingly survives the murders? julian. and julian is very much defined by his status as survivor throughout the story—it contributes to merricat’s insistence on treating him kindly (i spoke a bit about this here)—but it also contributes to his emasculation. julian was never much of a “man”, at least in the book’s terms, he wasn’t well-off, he was living off his brother, and was comparatively meek even before his arsenic-induced dementia. he is both symbolically and physically powerless. merricat tolerates him because she doesn’t perceive him in the way that she perceives her father, or the main target of the poisoning, thomas, and julian’s survival confirms her perception of him (in her mind he survived because he merited survival). when julian finally dies in chapter eight at the hands of the villagers, again indicative of his place among the blackwood women, and the stress caused by the fire, merricat wraps constance in his old shawl and constance even starts speaking like him in her daze. when she and constance return to the ruins of their house, they find everything burnt and blackened, except the kitchen, the cellar, their mother’s drawing room, and julian’s bedroom—i.e., the feminine domains are left untouched by the fire. constance also decides to wear julian’s suits and sleep in his old bed, and finds a place for his box of papers: the cellar, beside the rows upon rows of the blackwood women’s jams and preserves. merricat resolves to bury something of his; none of their other family members is buried on the estate, but burial is important in many ways in the story and merricat wants to honour julian, and in that way he becomes part of the blackwood women and their property weighting the house. constance planting a yellow flower for him is also decidedly not a masculine representation of julian, but an accurate one all the same
Who do you think is really behind the murders? I always thought that Constance might be the spark from which Merricat caught fire.
i am a constance murderess truther through and through. an interesting way to look at the murders is through the lens that everything was set up so that she and merricat would be the sole survivors; julian survived by accident, not by design. constance had already taken the role of blackwood woman/wife/mother from lucy by being a better gardener, cook and homemaker. maybe merricat wanted it to be just them forever, maybe constance did too, and for that to happen merricat had to take the role of her father for herself, and prevent thomas from taking it too. it’s worth also noting that merricat’s hatred of charles is rooted in her fear of him taking on their father’s role, and not just because he reminds her of her father - the role which she covets, makes available, and then adopts. charles’ arrival means poor merricat can’t play husband and wife with constance anymore, and it means she might be subject to neglect again.
merricat was often neglected by her parents, something that julian corroborates, and thomas was instead favoured. she resents thomas so much that she hardly mentions him, he appears only in her fantasy at the summerhouse, in which she dominates him via the means of food. as for her other family members, there doesn’t seem to be that same resentment towards them. she thinks of dorothy positively, she’s indignant on her mother’s behalf because of the rochester house, she’s neutral about her father - so why murder them all? with how little merricat seems to hate her dead family members, aside from thomas, it’s evident that constance must have had a significant role to play in her getting rid of them. constance, twenty-two at the time, was probably going to be married off soon, thomas was going to get her house (by rights the blackwood house should have belonged to her) and she and merricat were to be separated. now that just wouldn’t do for either of them.
it all comes back to roles, and the fact that merricat and constance were each other’s world in a house that didn’t care about them. how was merricat to keep hold of constance? by adopting her father’s position in the house and getting rid of everyone else.
revisiting this because merricat really does end the narrative in her father’s position, with one of the last things she says being “perhaps [the child] had a good whipping to teach him manners”, she successfully goes from being punished to doling out punishment. with merricat no longer at risk of neglect or discipline, whalitc serves as the completion of her original goal; it ends with just her and constance. “i wonder if i could eat a child if i had the chance.” “i doubt if i could cook one.” it all comes back to roles.
there’s also a scene towards the end where a mother warns her son, tommy, against approaching the blackwood house. when he asks why, she says that the ladies inside will hold him down and make him eat candy full of poison. more weight to the thomas theory, perhaps.
Merricat/Heathcliff parallels
Constance and Catherine couldn't be less alike as characters, but they are the only ones in Merricat and Heathcliff's lives to make them feel seen, and not only seen, but loved. Of course the latter two unleash violence when they feel that bond threatened.
And we can point out incestuous overtones in Merricat and Constance's relationship and call Catherine and Heathcliff the best doomed romance of all time, but all romantic/sexual feelings are secondary to the feeling of being seen and loved unconditionally in a household where everyone hates and punishes you. That is the mainspring of both obsessions and desires to control the loved ones. They are the only ones to see and love me; everyone else is the enemy and wants to keep us apart. They want to punish me and deprive me of my place at the table with my loved one. So I will take away their place. I will punish them.
Merricat by the end of the novel saying children should be punished, like her father. Merricat taking on the role of her father in the household by consuming what he ate on the day she killed him. Merricat as a husband to Constance promising to remove her from the family despite mirroring their father.