I’ve seen so many posts that basically boil down to ilya was being so open and vulnerable this episode :) and like. Maybe you can sorta kind of come to this conclusion as a viewer that is privy to more of ilya’s inner turmoil but there is no way that someone who has not watched things through his pov (like shane) would take his behavior as open and vulnerable which is exactly the problem! These mf just won’t talk to each other!
people can interpret things however they want lol but i suspect these people are bookpilled and are watching the show with the book's internal monologue in their heads. and i simply am not! because i find reid's perspective on these characters boring! and also because jacob tierney and the actors have clearly made different choices in adapting the book to a new medium! like let's look at it from shane's perspective. this is LITERALLY what he's experienced:
guy comes onto you in the showers. you fool around him a couple times your rookie year
guy sexts you relentlessly for TWO YEARS telling you how much he neeeeds to be the first person to fuck your ass
you have tender horny first-time anal with him and snuggle his coat in the stairwell after
couple weeks later same guy tells you you bore him and that you guys aren't anything when you try to express concern for him
guy ghosts you for MONTHS
guy rolls up late to the league awards ceremony after six months of radio silence acting like he's fresh off fucking someone who isn't you then feels you up on stage then chases you into the bathroom where you went to cry about it in private then engages in the most tender horny banter imaginable with you, kisses you like it's all he's been thinking about for months, and tells you he's going to give you everything you want later
you guys have super hot emotionally charged sex but he won't kiss you and then IMMEDIATELY after while you are literally still naked in bed together he stonewalls you SO hard and kicks you out
back to a couple more years of sexting and banter and illicit hookups
guy invites you over to his house for the first time. in the daytime instead of under cover of night. you have emotionally significant cowgirl (lol) and he asks you to stay over. he makes food for you. and then while you're sitting around on his couch relaxing and enjoying each other's company he delivers a five-minute monologue TOTALLY UNPROMPTED about how hot women are and how much he loves fucking them and how perfect this one particular woman is for him but also how easy it is for him to get any woman he wants anytime he wants and yeah he'll probably find another woman soon. he likes women. and sure he likes you but not as a person... tbh he finds you pretty boring but keeps you around because he's taught you how to suck his cock the way he likes it. also the entire time he's delivering this speech he's got his hand down the front of his pants. and do you think he washes his hands before bringing you your tuna melt? i doubt it
then he calls you by your first name during sex
then when you freak out and tell him you can't do this anymore because THIS IS JUST STRAIGHT-UP EMOTIONAL TERRORISM he calls you by your last name again but doesn't try to stop you from leaving and doesn't follow up afterwards
you start dating a nice person who actually likes you
your nightmare not-ex-because-we-were-never-anything turns up at the same club you're at with your girlfriend like he's got location tracking on or something and proceeds to make out with and grope a hot girl on the dance floor while making unblinking eye contact with you as you stand there looking just, like, completely emotionally eviscerated.
and THEN you have to go have sex with your nice girlfriend which SUCKS because you are GAY!!!! that's what your nightmare not-ex has driven you to!!!!
i'm sorry i know the book readers love their soft teddy bear dom ilya who is just overflowing with earnest big feelings but jacob tierney is in MY camp and that camp is: this man has SERIOUS ISSUES WITH INTIMACY caused by DEEPLY ROOTED CHILDHOOD TRAUMAS and he is making it SHANE'S PROBLEM.
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