¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I'm Ale

[everythingisterrible]

[zooophagous]

My car is getting serviced and this auto shop has a shop dog and he's ridiculous. Look at this guy. This is a grown ass man.

[meowsfeed]

Source: ayumioyabun

[drtanner]

I cannot stress this enough; PLEASE unmute :')

[gayvampyr]

adult friendships are so dumb like yeah i think i can find a time to hang. how’s february 17th at 4pm

[fleshdyk3]

easily one of my favourite tweets of all time

[perhats]

I say shit like "If my memory serves me" knowing damn well it serves the dark lord

[kygerbearr]

guy who has ibuprofen: I have ibuprofen if you need it btw

[kaijuno]

[whitepeopletwitter]

[bnprime]

how much are you allowed to store in jars, spread around your house?

[iwilltrytobereasonable]

As much as you like, but they can wander in at any time to smash the jars and take it

[rust-4-life]

i don’t know how to explain to you that trespassing, breaking and entering, and vandalism would all still be illegal.

[charlesoberonn]

Thank you for injecting realism into the world where the economy works like a Zelda game.

[teeveeland]

Mouse-Warming (1952)

[dorothylarouge]

[towerofglass]

[medlabmech]

The ginger ale stays during sex

[enki2]

[feastofsnakes]

hey sorry for getting really pissy at you earlier because I could hear you chewing. see I have a condition called [remembers pathologizing my behavior is unhelpful] it's actually because I hate you, specifically,

[codewitch]

Today I encountered an especially pathetic Italian greyhound. His owner told me that a gust of wind once blew him into a lake.

[sevenminuteshadpassed]

[medievaljournalist]

surely summoning many ghouls would improve this situation