[apxptosis]

yeah compartmentalising one's thoughts is all nice and fun but have you ever compartmentalised your entire personality

[apxptosis]

is it stupidity or blatant ignorance, which basically is the same i guess, but how and why are people unable to learn from past experiences? instead of complaining about my lack of empathy yet again, you could've just gone to all of these other emotional people and they all would've given you more of what you needed. but no, you had to choose me, the least empathic person you know, only to be disappointed again.

why is it so hard for people to take a mental note or tick a box with "low empathy" next to my name and the next time they need some empathy to read that note, check, move onto the next person. case closed

[spectralhwa]

stop trying to contact me I don’t exist

[apxptosis]

my funeral better be a private function with just my own name on the guest list. you can be next though

[nopointinname]

Rule of thumb: the closer you are to me the further away you are from me.

[girlzoid]

i hate when people "interaction bait" like: "omg! no way!" and dont tell you what theyre talking about, so that you ask them

[olfpoststoomuch]

i dont get celebrations and there probably isnt a single one i dont think is stupid. 'oh you gotta celebrate something' no i dont tf. im not religious so why would i celebrate religious holidays, im not particularly happy about being here and time is just something we made up so why would i celebrate birthdays, new years just means a new calender and noise. accomplishments are just things i planned. like, i went to university so that i could graduate, no reason to celebrate that i didnt fucking fail. if i wasnt going to graduate then why would i go? if it wasnt my plan then its luck. and why would i celebrate luck?

[baketamon]

“The majority of schizoids are not either over sensitive or cold but they are over sensitive and cold at the same time in quite different relative proportions.”

— E. Kretschmer

[threedollarsdotcom]

thinking about getting surgery to remove everything

[hiamakx]

selective cause i want peace, not attention

[apxptosis]

I do carry a lot of trauma around. The fact that I have developed a disorder that simply unhooks my self from everything ever so that experience turns into recognition makes it rather hard to work with any of it.

My trauma is a zoo animal, safely held inside a private and isolated cage, waiting for whenever I'll come around to visit. I rarely do though. After so many years, there's nothing interesting about it anymore, I've studied all there is to know. It's become stale and old but no less feral.

Occasionally, there are days when I can hear the trauma roar and rage inside its prison, and I'll have to check for damages to the enclosure and patch up a few holes as best as I can. Sometimes I look at the trauma, too. Sometimes I let myself pity its pathetic existence. But mostly, it disgusts me. It's a wretched creature, desperate and wounded yet unable to die.

Alas, time to go, the zoo is closing. Don't forget to wash your hands before you leave.

[exhaled-spirals]

“I have always believed it my right to have a locked door between me and the world, and to hold the key myself.”

— Mihail Sebastian, For Two Thousand Years

[probuccalfat]

nobody gets me. not because i’m really complicated or anything but because i won’t tell anyone anything real about me

[blackvelvetmimosa]

my idea of a good time is [white noise fills the room, i melt into the æther]

[hungryfictions]

Ruth Madievsky, All-Night Pharmacy

[ryebreadgf]

next week has drained me…

[apxptosis]

are you really an empath if you can only empathise with other empaths though