Call Me Mack!!!

I’m definitely not a fish trying to live amongst humans She/her-Aromantic-18 Ask box is always open If you want me to tag something please don’t be afraid to ask Goblin blog: @goblinmack DNI: terfs/exclus/nsfw/kink/ddlg/maps/pedos/supporters/etc

[aro-mackerel]

Tbh I love journaling now, not like aesthetic bullet journaling but like just scrawling all my thoughts onto a page

[aro-mackerel]

So when I leave him on read for hours it’s perfectly fine but when he doesn’t open my message for two minutes I wanna fucking kill myself? That sounds logical

I fucking hate everything about me

[aro-mackerel]

Welp I think I’m definitely not ace

[aro-mackerel]

Tbh r/lactoseintolerant is one of the most hilarious subreddits

[aro-mackerel]

For example:

[aro-mackerel]

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

when i was in grade 5 some kid told me the song “wake me up when september ends” was about 9/11 and i believed him until like three years ago

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

i cried so hard when we watched the lion king in first grade that my teacher called my parents and sent me home early

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

in high school i was questioned by the principal over drug use because i accidentally left my notebook in the bathroom and a teacher opened it to a drawing of an anime character saying “all i want for christmas is weed” but really i was a repressed nerd and never smoked a weed in my life

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

i made a joke about anal fissures in front of my extremely religious roommate and i thought she was gonna yell at me but instead she asked what an anal fissure was

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

i thought hatsune miku was a real person 

[buzzlightyearhugecock]

in grade 8 i got in trouble for saying vagina in science class so the teacher made me fill out this stupid discipline worksheet and one of the questions was “how do i feel about what i did” 

i answered “good”

[clubpenguinkiller]

[jillyyfish]

“again, weird, but also technically not a sin”

[itshardtoactnormal-blog]

You’re COMING OUT of your losing season. UNIVERSE is about to restore all that was lost.

[glassia]

Bitch I fucking hope so

[aro-mackerel]

We're fish buddies! :0

🐠💚🐟 FISH FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AQUATIC AQUAINTANCES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!🐟💚🐠

[aro-mackerel]

I know I’ve talked about this before but the reason I dont use the SAM is because I’m not ace but I’m definitely not allo. I find people attractive but I can’t tell whether it’s sexual attraction or if they’re just really cute and I wanna stare at them. It’s confusing but since I started not bothering with my sexual orientation I’ve been a lot less confused and much more happier

[jayzpenney]

*likes your answered ask but not in an “I sent that” way*

[aro-mackerel]

Poem I (as a character, Bob) wrote (about his wife, Emilia) for a story I’m working on

You hurt me

Destroyed me with one word

Healed me with one look

You were angry,

not at me but directed to me

Fear, Terror, Distress

Overwhelming my senses

I felt like Arachne caught in Athena’s wrath

Soon to be doomed.

Yet, the second your eyes met mine

You smiled

Your anger vanished

And with it my Fear,

For you said “I love you”

By gently brushing the solitary tear from my cheek.

Constructive criticism is welcome however I may not ever actually change it

[aro-mackerel]

Tbh r/lactoseintolerant is one of the most hilarious subreddits

[aro-mackerel]

For example:

[scoutsmoocrew]

interesting how when ppl mention they tricked ppl into eating v*gan food under the assumption it was normal food people are fine with it/happy but if you trick a v*gan into eating meat you’re a terrible person and it starts WW3

[such-justice-wow]

Both are awful, don't fuck with people's diets.

[da-boy-o-kultur]

Honestly “tricking” a regular person into eating a vegan meal isn’t even tricking, it’s food, regular people don’t give a shit whether it has meat in it or not.

[scoutsmoocrew]

if you tell someone it’s meat but it’s actually a soy-based meat alternative it’s tricking. You better hope they don’t have a soy allergy 🙄

[l0dge49]

yeah i gotta chime in: i’m super allergic to multiple common vegan alternatives in recipes, like coconuts and bananas, so. yeah. i do care if it’s a vegan alternative because I Don’t Know What’s In That. if you serve me, hell, let’s say brownies, i’ll assume that they’re just regular everyday brownies.

and then you tell me they’re vegan and were made with bananas, and i’ve already figured that out because my throat is swelling and i feel like vomiting. and as the op said: some of the most common allergies are to soy and nuts. what if you ‘trick’ someone into eating tofu and it turns out they have an extreme soy allergy?  

the issue has not at all been ‘people want animal products in their food’, the issue was clearly stated to be ‘don’t trick people into eating things they professed to not like, because it can put them in the goddamn hospital’.

[coyotesmokebreak]

Any kind of tricking people with foods is playing with a person’s life.

You can’t know everyone’s allergies, medical conditions, etc

So thats a real asshole move especially when the common alternatives to animal products are also very common allergens.Same thing with tricking people about whether something was made with animal products—dairy is a common allergen and lactose intolerance is rly common.

You can call it a joke all you want but when someone ends up in the hospital following anaphylaxis (if they’re lucky) do you really think it’ll be sufficient or acceptable to look them in the face and say “it was a joke”

[autijacen]

Seitan is a common meat substitute, that is similar in texture (when properly prepared) to ground Italian sausage.

It's made entirely out of vital wheat gluten. Pure gluten.

It could KILL my parents.

[lynati]

NEVER LIE ABOUT WHAT IS IN FOOD. IT COULD *KILL* SOMEONE. And if it doesn’t kill them, but just put them into severe pain for several hours, or days? They’re never going to fucking trust you again. You’d be lucky if they’ll still speak to you, if you deliberately lied about the contents of something in order to trick them into eating it.

[lake-hysterial]

^^^^

[aro-mackerel]

Tbh r/lactoseintolerant is one of the most hilarious subreddits

[utopians]

when I become an eccentric billionaire I'm going to buy every house in 10 square blocks of unremarkable suburb. I will have them all furnished and decorated except for (and this is key) one house in the dead center. this house I will put up for sale at a ridiculously reasonable price for the area. once it sells, and the new owner/couple/family moves in, the plan will spring into action.

every single house besides the one in the center within my 10 square blocks will remain uninhabited. I will put all the lights inside on timers so that it appears that people are living in there, I will have lawns mowed when I'm sure everyone in my victim house is at work/school, I will have decorations put up during the holidays and cars moved there and parked in driveways when I'm sure that the owner/couple/family in the house at the center is not there to witness it happening. I will produce all the superficial trappings of life without a single person actually being there.

who knows how long it'll take them to realize that something is wrong? when their kids are playing in the yard, and they notice they've never seen another child around here even once, despite the four-bedroom family homes all down the street? after a few weeks, when they realize the lights in the house across the way click off at exactly 9:45, on the second, every single night? when they've been living there for a month and a half and they realize they've never seen a single car park in front of another house? when they want to greet their neighbors and not a single house in the whole neighborhood opens its door?

when they do realize that they're completely alone here, what would they do with that fact? what would you do if all at once, as you stood in a crowd, you realized that every single person around you was a mannequin? it's unnerving, sure, but enough to warrant a move? how long will they live in this idyllic ghost town before it gets to them? can a person survive in a dollhouse? Thank you. *I wave to the crowd as I walk offstage at my ted talk. one person gives a halfhearted round of applause from the back. a talk about sustainable ecosystem management was scheduled for right now and no one knows how I got up here.*

[aro-mackerel]

I just got bangs

[aro-mackerel]

[aro-mackerel]

I just got bangs