I'm too aro for this

ashe I it/its I genderless I aplatonic I loveless I aspec focused queer blog

[aliteralchicken]

sexualizing your fav characters? Nah mate you got me wrong, I’m asexualizing them, that one’s demi now

[aliteralchicken]

aromanticizing the hell out of this one

[arodabi]

Me writing my ocs: u can have problematic aspec traits :) as a treat :)

[thewardenisonthecase]

storytelling wise. we need more marriage as horror

[our-aplatonic-experience]

my rather specific aplatonic experience is regularly guiding random new players around in videogames so they get a good experience and because its fun :D and then they ask to be friends D: and i just gotta smile and nod and accept the friend request and log off until theyre gone and hope they forget i exist.

.

[the-indigo-symphony]

This sort of thing is why I don't think we will be able to have the communities (especially local communities) that people (especially activists) shout about everyone "needing" unless people learn to divorce kindness from friendship. I just don't. If you equate the two then you break the whole idea of community, of being kind to people just because they are people, of being there for each other even if you don't really like each other. If you equate the two, then you can't be kind to someone unless you care about them personally. You can't accept or show kindness without expecting more from the other person. You can't just help someone out, you have to be ready to dedicate yourself to a relationship you might not want or have the energy/headspace for. You can't stand up for someone who is experiencing injustice without apparently being besties with them and supporting everything they do (looking at you, Tumblr). It fucking sucks and discourages people from common courtesy or even upholding fairness. Equating friendship and kindness is possibly my least favorite form of platonormativity.

Kindness ≠ friendship, and being kind ≠ expressing platonic attraction. The day people understand that, I will dance in the streets.

[a-flaming-triple-a]

Yasmin Benoit, a prominent Black aroace activist, stepping down from ace advocacy for a while after experiencing so much racism from white members of those communities is the ultimate proof that our communities need to change. There is a serious racism problem within the ace and aro communities and we cannot just ignore it. All of us need to do a better job of uplifting and listening to BIPOC voices; that's including me. When you're white, in a primarily white space, you often don't notice that some people aren't having as good of a time as you. Or maybe you do hear about it, but you don't want to believe it because you personally were helped so much by the community that you believe it could do no wrong. But it is time that us white aros and aces stop being ignorant of this problem and start listening, learning, and standing against racism in our communities so that they can truly be open to anyone.

I will reblog this soon with a list of BIPOC a-specs who are speaking on this issue (or just existing and making good content). Anyone is encouraged to add to the list. Also, please call me out if I have said or done anything racist, intentionally or not, so I may correct my behavior for the future. I really want the aro and ace communities, including this blog, to feel safe for everyone.

[a-flaming-triple-a]

Links (most thanks to @asexyfaeriefate 's amazing research into this issue! I'd highly suggest looking through their tag #black asexuals for more!):

Realizing you’re aseuxal is super confusing with these myths floating around. Let’s debunk them to build a healthier view of sex for everyon

When you’re a black asexual, you always get this feeling that you don’t “look” like other asexual. The gay aesthetic just doesn’t fit you an

The Asexual Community is Predominately White. Why?

According to a recent survey conducted in 2014 by the Asexual Visibility and Education Network of over 10,000 asexual people, 77.3% of the…

The Hardships Of Being An Asexual Woman Of Color

The personal, racial, spiritual, and societal clashes of being asexual. "I feel like growing up as a black cisfemale, I wasn't given many ch

#ThisIsWhat Asexual Looks Like: Black Aces Edition

Representation for a minority among a minority Yasmin Benoit made a cool instagram post recently and I couldn’t find anyone mentioning it he

Book:

Let's Talk About Love - Claire Kann

YouTube:

Marshall John Blount

Just an Ace guy trying to make it through life...This vlog will be about my everyday life and Asexual awareness.....I hope y'all will tag al

Ahsante the Artist

✨Move Consciously & Creatively Through Life✨ 🌱For people who want to learn, grow, do better, and be better. These creative videos are here

Asexuality Asia

www.AsexualityAsia.org

black protagonist

Introverted, multi-faced queer black novelist living in Chicago. Aspiring to travel the world and tell you all about it through media. Watch

Yasmin Benoit

I'm Yasmin Benoit, a British alternative model and asexuality activist. I'm not a serious YouTuber but I do post on here from time to time.

[metanarrates]

tbh if i was really into a het relationship with a fun unique dynamic and i logged online to tumblr and saw that the fans were going "alright we have 4 flavors of misogyny available to portray women with so we're gonna pick one" id become the joker. hetjoshis im so sorry you have to deal with fanon

[pannoli]

this is so accurate holy shit

[drill-teeth]

Something I really struggle to get people to understand is that like. Sometimes there was no intentional homoerotic subtext, the author was just extremely misogynistic. Sometimes the author wasn't "secretly shipping" those two men, the author literally just hates women so much that they see them as being literally incapable of relationships with depth. Like this is kind of a big thing with misogyny actually. A lot of extremely misogynistic people truly believe that a man can only have meaningful and complex relationships with other men because they literally just think women are so inferior they only exist to birth children and clean the house. It's like when people say along the lines of "no one worships exclusively men quite like straight men do". It's just that phenomenon actually. That happens to be manifesting in a raging misogynist's writing. Writing a man character who literally only puts effort into his friendships with other men while completely ignoring his literal girlfriend or wife is actually an extremely straight thing to write. And that doesn't mean you can't ship those men or that there are no stories with actual intentional homoerotic subtext. I just think it's important to be able to recognize extreme misogyny in writing and acknowledge it without brushing it off and assuming good intentions when literally all evidence is screaming that this was a misogynistic writing choice and not a representing gay men choice.

[berensreverie]

idk pride flags are always just stripes so I made a non-binary flag with my favorite dinosaur archaeopteryx. Two heads to symbolize balance between two genders!

[certifieddragonenjoyer]

I'm not even gonna bring out the asexual beam I'm just gonna start saying popular ships are celibate and when people are like tf are you on im gonna say "being allosexual doesn't mean they have to want sex!"

[servaltherium]

you literally can't make any posts on this goddamn site about platonic relationships. you just can't talk about liking things platonically there will always be that one motherfucker who goes up to you and says "wait... but what if... i made everything about romantic love instead" as if its a revolutionary concept and we need to be able to kill these kinds of people and im serious

[archive-deactivated20260501]

it/its and neopronoun users should be allowed to destroy people with mind powers

[threedollarsdotcom]

looks like a pronoun storm im gonna open up an umbrella term

[tastylemonbread]

i appreciate asexual perverts but they get enough attention tbh. shoutout my asexuals with no hoes boring as hell no kinks no dirty magazines no riske drawings just completely winning the idgaf war

[ukefledgling]

ik this is a joke post but i have noticed that while yes being sex-repulsed asexual is the only type of asexual a lot of people know about people equate visibility with positivity and sort of forget that a lot of people have a problem with asexuals not liking or wanting sex and so they try to over correct by talking a lot about sex favorable asexuals but it just turns into “guys don’t worry!! asexual people can still be normal ^^” and even spreading ideas like suggesting asexuals should have sex with their partners if they really love them

[queerasfact]

Today, 25 February, in 1971, New York newspaper The Village Voice published an article, titled Asexuals Have Problems Too. The article satirised earlier debates in the paper, which had argued over whether straight or gay people had things harder, positing that being asexual in a sex-obsessed world was the hardest of all. You can read the whole thing here.

Although the article was not intended to be taken seriously, it resonated with readers – some wrote in thanking the author for increasing the visibility of asexuality, others wrote in solidarity, hoping to learn more about how to support the ace community.

If you’d like to hear more about this moment in ace history, check out our podcast!

[annabelle--cane]

what I mean: "sexual intercourse" is as much a social construct as "romantic courtship," and you discover this very quickly as a queer person if you try to talk to able bodied straight cis people who literally think the only thing that counts as Actual Sex is penis-in-vagina penetration, like they call oral "foreplay" it's so dire. various people have a lot of vested interest in cleanly defining "sex" vs "not sex" for a whole slew of reasons (ex. censorship dodging and enforcing, conferring the social clout of virginity and prowess, finding and closing loopholes about premarital sex, deciding what relationships "count" as serious partnerships, ligating what is general assault vs sexual assault vs Something That's Definitely Probably Fine And Not Sexual At All, Actually, etc.), and it's really not something you can just fall back on as obvious common sense that people are dumb for questioning.

what I say: sex isn't real and you can't have it

[narcpolar]

Any character can be aromantic if you try hard enough. Be the change you want to see in the world.

[virgoboy]

Everyone stop getting married now