To Black asexuals, this post is very long and very important:
Toni Morrison once said, racism is a distraction. It is not a binary choice of fighting antiblack aspecs and supporting Black asexuals, both matter, but with the increase of antiblackness on here, the microaggressions, the smear campaigns and the leak, I’ve focused more on archiving antiblackness on here and fighting antiblack non Black aspecs than what I originally wanted to do - uplift Black asexuals, share your work, give you advice, talk to you all and build ourselves a Black ace community. The only people at fault here are those white people and non Black people of colour who continue to derail, attack, harass and lie on this page because they hate Blackness that much, not me for paying attention to them. I will never apologise to any of these people and this statement is not and will never be an apology to the white aspecs and the non Black aspecs of colour who created, enabled, and justified the ‘they’re cancelling aces for not liking rap’ smear campaign towards me. Ever. But regardless, there’s a lot of things I planned to do on here that never happened because fighting these antiblack racists came first and that upsets me.
I’m sorry to the Black minors on this page, because no one else will, because white aspec tumblr doesn’t think any of you exist. I know more than one of you were sent the n word in your ask boxes, whether it was random or specifically because you have a connection to this page. Either way, you got called antiblack slurs as Black minors because you spoke about antiblackness in the aspec community. The white teenagers who’ve spread the smear campaign that I harass minors because I screenshotted their antiblackness are the same white minors and teens who share your year groups, who are probably racist to you offline in your schools and youth groups and will grow up to be your racist coworkers in the workplace. You came to this page for Black ace positivity and all you’re seeing is a reminder that you’re hated, even as minors and this will follow you all when you become Black adults.
I’m also sorry to non asexual Black people, because even though you lot aren’t asexual, you have been targeted by the white aspec community on here because you are Black people with open sexual expression. They continue to attack, mock and stigmatise the sexual expression of non asexual Black people, specifically Black American culture such as AAVE and hip hop and weaponise their asexualities, aromanticisms, sex repulsions and other characteristics to justify their hatred of your sexualities as Black people. I’m sorry to those of you who are questioning if you are on the ace spectrum or know you aren’t ace but consider yourself a nonsexual person, because you won’t be able to do it safely or question that on this website and as Black asexuals, we can’t sit here and promise you that you’ll be accepted in the tumblr aspec community or any other aspec community if you are Black, because the truth is, you won’t be.
I’ve come to the conclusion that inevitably, there will always be white asexuals on tumblr who will come to this page to be antiblack to us and there will always be non Black asexuals of colour who will support them. There will always be non asexual white people and non Black POC who will be antiblack to us and justify it because they hate our asexualities as well as our Blackness. I’ve also come to the conclusion that white aromantics and non Black aromantics of colour will always be complicit too, if not defending these antiblack asexuals, then shifting the blame of antiblackness onto them as a part of aromantic separatism, whilst not actually supporting Black asexuals and washing their hands clean of how they treat Black aromantics.
I will always be told that I’m lying about antiblackness in the aspec community, no matter how overwhelming it is. I will always be told I’m cancelling, harassing or bullying aroacesafeplaceforall because I called them out for antiblackness and called them out for lying about what I said to them and their mutuals. I will always be accused of bullying white minors because I got evidence of them defending the smear campaign orchestrated by aroacesafeplaceforall, despite the fact that being a minor will never be a justification for antiblackness and Black minors exist. My followers will always be accused of harassment because they called out aroacesafeplaceforall’s antiblackness and because they’re Black. White aspecs and the non Black POC they tokenise on here will use DARVO, claiming I’m the harasser, the bully and the racist, when they’re the ones who’ve spread the lie, for a year, that I think not liking rap is racist, that I’m cancelling aroacesafeplaceforall because they don’t like rap, that I bully the minors who follow them for shits and giggles and painted me as the angry, aggressive, hostile, uncivil and yelling Black woman for pushing back on these lies and for being an outspoken Black asexual who calls out antiblackness in the aspec community. I’ve shown the screenshots, I’ve shown the links to OG posts, I’ve told my story and I’ve only told the truth, but it’s not enough and outside of Black tumblr, I don’t think I’ll be believed or supported because this ‘cancelled for not liking rap’ narrative has spread across aspec tumblr, which is predoniminantly white.
A lot of you relied on me to deliver a safe space, a form of happiness for Black asexuals and a community for us all, but instead all all of us have gotten is the very same antiblackness that we came here to avoid; called the n word and other slurs, told we’re bullies, told we’re harassers, told we’re aphobes, told we’re gatekeepers, told we’re anti-white anti-non Black racists, told we’re mentally lesser than white asexuals because we’re outspoken about their antiblackness, told we’re not even asexual and more methods used to actively supress Black people in aspec spaces to maintain the dominance of white aspecs.
I ask you all to join my new Discord specifically for Black and mixed Black aces. I can’t guarantee that no white asexual or non Black ace of colour will try to invade and destroy this space like they’ve tried on here, but I can say that tumblr is a white queer echo chamber, that will only value white asexuals and white aromantics in the aspec community and this set up will always be at Black asexuals’ and Black aromantics’ espense. I don’t think it will ever be a place that’s good for building Black ace or Black aro community online.
I really hope I can see you all in this new discord, but for those of you who aren’t on discord or don’t get an invite, this is goodbye. I won’t expect any of you to join a new platform if you don’t want to, especially if any of you had bad experiences on discord. Black ace culture will always exist because that’s what we’re all doing right now and what we’ll always be doing. We’ll always have Black asexual art, Black asexual representation, Black asexual activism, SoulAce Day and Black asexual spaces. There’s already a face-to-face Black ace and aro meetup in America and there’s a Black aspec community that’s thriving on TikTok. But for aspec tumblr, I have lost all hope that we’ll ever be accepted here, let alone be able to build a space for us to thrive. I have to put the well-being, safety and freedom of Black asexuals above all else because we have no physical spaces and our online spaces are only just being made. Meanwhile, popular white aroace bloggers will maintain their clout no matter how antiblack they are to us because antiblackness in aspec tumblr is acceptable, white ace teens who’ve cried ‘harassment’ will be fine because they’re growing up in a world that rewards their whiteness and essentially, nothing will really ‘happen’ to them. But Black asexuals will lose out because we’re losing our only spaces whilst rejected from the main ones. That’s why, I will only apologise to Black asexuals in that situation 3 weeks ago.
I’ve been vindicated in something I’ve known for a long time and that is that tumblr white aspecs need me, but I don’t need them. Multiple white people on here have told me straight up that I’m too aggressive but they still like my Black ace content. They hate my Blackness, they think I’m one of the ‘bad’ Blacks who does anti-racism the wrong way and but they still need me and want me and other Black aces on here to create these posts about being Black and asexual and post Yasmin Benoit’s pictures so they can tokenise us, make themselves look morally superior to the white people they personally dislike, to clapback at aphobes who claim all asexuals are white and to educate them about Blackness, asexuality and how they intersect. I have never signed up to be the educator or activist for white asexuals or frankly any white person at all, especially when numerous Black ace activists have given their time and resources for educating these white people, ace and non ace and they are never listened to or genuinely supported. Inevitably, anything I do for Black asexuality on tumblr will end up benefitting antiblack white asexuals and antiblack non Black asexuals of colour, but I have a choice in whether or not I feed the machine that’s the white queer echo chamber of tumblr. I refuse to allow my work, my thoughts and my art for Black asexuality to be used, sanitised and derailed for the greed, entitlement and ego antiblack racists in the white aspec community of tumblr, who never supported us and will never help us in this current rise of fascism.
Whilst I’m sad this is the end of the blog, we had a good run and it will keep going, just not on tumblr. Without the work of Black ace and Black aros in this community, our activists, writers and artists, white aspec tumblr will never evolve outside of validity politics, garlic bread memes and vapid liberal individualism. Meanwhile, in our new space, we’ll keep Black ace culture alive by continuing to create for ourselves, developing our spaces, developing an actual politic and praxis and building community and white aspec tumblr will not access it this time. And in a way, that will be poetic justice in motion.
Thank you, Black asexuals, for everything. 🖤🤎🤍💜
