what if i said fuck it

@arthurxmedic

93 posts

there's something i love so much about playing a character who initially seems like a jokey, goof-em-up, too smiley person who hip-fires at every double entendre and euphemism,

a person whose unflappable grin only ever disappears for a moment, even after being murdered, twice,

whose pretty party girl persona is razor-sharp, if inappropriate – an attitude which would border on obnoxious if it didn't smack of genuinely saccharine whimsy – put deftly to disorienting and disarming,

all of it, to those who can watch long enough, melting into something so frivolous, so silly, so scatterbrained that it rings truly alien.

it is delightful playing a character whose predominant goal is to become the greatest thief alive, and whose highest skills are about sneaking and subterfuge, yet has an absolutely unmistakable appearance

something is very wrong with her, and it is delicious

#everybody got that one weird homie #who got possessed by a ghost in high school and it gave them colour blindness

it was literally her birthday! spectral son of a bitch came from beyond the border of the real, restless and untethered by whim or worry but for the desire to drain her (pause) of body heat and brain waves and post-exorcism - which should have been cool! - the other teens were just pissed their team's star athlete missed the most important game of the year, losing them the title and bragging rights

meanwhile her eyes had a new sensitivity to the etheric spectrum. shit was too bright bc of all the extradimensional light and she had to wear sunglasses indoors like a dickhead

the ranger that did the exorcism told them they'd have to come with him for training so they wouldn't continue to be a conduit for the unsettled dead, which did NOT go over well

they jumped down the fire escape and crash landed in a dumpster. they were planning to keep running, but the irony of the visual metaphor hit too close and there was a cute minco already stuck in the dumpster, so they just grabbed the wiggly trash noodle and had a good cry

mountaintop training arc on a moon where tarrasques (yes, multiple monsters with a CR equal to the apocalypse,) wandered the lowlands, learning how to be possessed solely of one's own ghost

almost immediately graduated with flying colors and split to go "attend" college. which mostly amounted to crashing every party, couch surfing and fucking nasty, and auditing classes relevant to her special interest in the hyperdimensional. at one point she stole a one-of-a-kind prototype of a handbag designed by a transmuter

they met a girl who turned out to be an assassin running a secret society in the allied colleges, flirted with sharp objects, and took a dare to go train in an astral monastery

almost bar for bar that post that's like "nvm they wanted to teach me discipline and patience instead of hundred-man slaying fist technique so i don't care anymore" and leaving with some ancient texts. outside of the astral plane it was minutes later

she finally caught a ship home eight years after leaving, six years older. full back tattoo and half sleeves, impossible shapes and blue snakes and diamonds both card suit and jewel. the same minco that was in the dumpster, but now it's completely white with bright pink eyes and wearing a gold bracelet as a collar. so much fucking evidence of some crazy experiences, and it just got more insane immediately

#so a minco is like a ferret with an opossum face and raccoon hands and a velociraptor tail #they are Bral's most entrenched invasive species #and the wiggly little guys are THRIVING #demicore #oc

there's something i love so much about playing a character who initially seems like a jokey, goof-em-up, too smiley person who hip-fires at every double entendre and euphemism,

a person whose unflappable grin only ever disappears for a moment, even after being murdered, twice,

whose pretty party girl persona is razor-sharp, if inappropriate – an attitude which would border on obnoxious if it didn't smack of genuinely saccharine whimsy – put deftly to disorienting and disarming,

all of it, to those who can watch long enough, melting into something so frivolous, so silly, so scatterbrained that it rings truly alien.

it is delightful playing a character whose predominant goal is to become the greatest thief alive, and whose highest skills are about sneaking and subterfuge, yet has an absolutely unmistakable appearance

something is very wrong with her, and it is delicious

#everybody got that one weird homie #who got possessed by a ghost in high school and it gave them colour blindness

it was literally her birthday! spectral son of a bitch came from beyond the border of the real, restless and untethered by whim or worry but for the desire to drain her (pause) of body heat and brain waves and post-exorcism - which should have been cool! - the other teens were just pissed their team's star athlete missed the most important game of the year, losing them the title and bragging rights

meanwhile her eyes had a new sensitivity to the etheric spectrum. shit was too bright bc of all the extradimensional light and she had to wear sunglasses indoors like a dickhead

#she still wears sunglasses indoors but in a cool sexy vampire way #and not in a 'my wife hates how tall my truck is' kinda way #demicore

notjusthespongenextdoor

For a city to be walkable. It must also be sittable.

notjusthespongenextdoor

#every time I read this phrase the same thing happens#I read it as shittable and go wait that can't be right#oh right they were talking about public benches that makes more sense#but public bathrooms available without fees should also be a thing tho#cities should definitely be shittable#it happens EVERY SINGLE TIME

it must also be shittable

there's something i love so much about playing a character who initially seems like a jokey, goof-em-up, too smiley person who hip-fires at every double entendre and euphemism,

a person whose unflappable grin only ever disappears for a moment, even after being murdered, twice,

whose pretty party girl persona is razor-sharp, if inappropriate – an attitude which would border on obnoxious if it didn't smack of genuinely saccharine whimsy – put deftly to disorienting and disarming,

all of it, to those who can watch long enough, melting into something so frivolous, so silly, so scatterbrained that it rings truly alien.

it is delightful playing a character whose predominant goal is to become the greatest thief alive, and whose highest skills are about sneaking and subterfuge, yet has an absolutely unmistakable appearance

something is very wrong with her, and it is delicious

#this bitch is insane #they may be obviously fiend-touched with horns and a tail and eyes like gold baubles but they will not let you forget they are FEY #i love her evil ways #everybody got that one exceptionally weird homie #who got possessed by a ghost in high school and it gave them color blindness #dnd oc #d&d character #Jump Point

catboybiologist

Imagine if a like 8 foot tall guy that looked kinda like an alien species just kinda showed up at the house you rent a room in and crashed on the couch and at first everyone hated him but you kinda just accepted this weird massive kinda-human alien species thing as a part of your group even though he's like twice the size of everyone else there

catboybiologist

Cuz that's literally happening to sea lions in San Francisco right now

catboybiologist

So there's two species of sea lion in North America: the California sea lion, ranging along California (including Baja) but not ranging into the north coast or into oregon

And the Stellar's sea lion, which are WAY bigger and live in Washington, British Columbia, and Alaska

A male Stellars sea lion showed up in SF like a month ago and just kinda. Didn't know what to do, and joined a colony of California sea lions, and is just kinda chilling there now.

catboybiologist

Weird vagrant species happen from time to time, but this is just a particularly funny instance of a highly social species getting very lost, and just trying to blend in with its closest nearby relatives

weirdly, this is how my last dnd character joined the campaign

#strigsstjóri starsgård #enormous goliath in superheavy plate armour #who always seemed to talk like things were life or death in a war for the fate of the world #he was right #absentee prince of the cloud sea #witchknight #he's 8 foot 4

Wait what's a buildings fire evacuation plan if you aren't supposed to use the elevator to get down

You go down the stairwell/fire escape. Is that weird?

But what if you have a walker or a wheelchair??

durpacerangerrogjro

in america at least, in this situation, there isnt one. either your loved ones or the firemen can get you out using the emergency fire escapes or stairs, or you die

That's fucking horrific, thank you

official-lucifers-child

“fun” little story:

last summer my friend who is an amazingly talented artist and i were in this super tall building, and she’s in a wheelchair and i’m pushing her around the room. it’s an art exhibit and some of her art was chosen to be showcased there and so it’s all fine and dandy until suddenly an alarm starts going off

a FIRE ALARM

everyone starts running for the stairs and my friend just looks at me with this forlorn look on her face

“i can’t go down the stairs”

but i’m a stubborn bitch “i’ll carry you”

“what about my chair? it’s too expensive for me to be able to get another one if i can’t get this one back”

“i’ll carry that too”

and i did. we went to the stairs (by then most people from our floor were gone) and i lifted her up in a fireman’s carry over my shoulder and then lifted her chair up and used the ridiculous amount of adrenaline that was coursing through my veins to make it down approximately 20 half-flights of stairs until we met some people exiting lower floors, one of which who kindly took the chair. I changed positions so i was holding my friend bridal-style which was, somehow, easier and the person who took her wheelchair (with her permission to handle it of course) accompanied me to the ground floor and then out the doors

basically there is no real protocol for people who can’t use the stairs in an emergency. it’s up to the people with them, if anyone, to help them or the person to somehow make it down the stairs alone, unassisted

thank fuck that it was just a faulty alarm system, because if i was unable to carry her down those stairs and the building was on fucking fire???? then i don’t know what would have happened to her, but i don’t think it would have been very good.

it’s fucking ridiculous and ableist to the absolute max.

girlfriendsofthegalaxy

I use a cane. When I did a day-long fire safety training at my northeast American university (UMass Amherst), I asked that exact same question: “what am I supposed to do if the fire alarm goes off and I’m in my lab on the twelfth floor?”

the fire marshal hemmed and hawed for a while and then said to take the elevator- you’re supposed to leave it free for the fire department to use and they want able-bodied people out fast not waiting for elevators. if the fire alarm has just gone off the building probably hasn’t suffered enough structural damage to make using the elevator dangerous, and modern elevator wells are heavily reinforced. many large and high-trafficked buildings on my campus have fire rated elevators that link in with the fire alarm system so they won’t let you off on a floor with a possible fire.

if the elevator isn’t working, wait in the stairwell and call the fire department to let them know where you are. modern stairwells are also heavily reinforced- it might not be pleasant but modern building code usually requires fire-resistant stairwell doors in office and big residential buildings, also to help firefighters get in and out safely. older buildings’ stairwells may or may not be retrofitted with fire-resistant doors but a stairwell is generally the safest place to wait if you can’t get out.

what happened to your friend was horrible, and i’m very glad you were there to help her out, but you can absolutely use the elevator to evacuate if it’s not shut down. those don’t-use-the-elevator rules are for abled people.

This is GOOD TO KNOW. why do they not tell people this??

Okay, firefighter here. If you are not physically able to use the stairs, and the elevator is NOT compromised, use the elevator. But you MUST be ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN that the elevator is NOT compromised before you get into it, because there is always the chance that once you get into it, you may not exit it. Power could go out. The elevator may actually BE compromised and you just couldn’t tell from where you were until you were in there, and it suddenly shuts down on you. Something else could happen.

Understand that once you enter the elevator, you could POTENTIALLY be taking your life into your hands there.

It is NOT LIKELY, to be perfectly honest. It’s only in a pretty catastrophic scenario - think the Twin Towers, USA, on September 11th - that the elevators will be compromised and out of service. But there is a NOT ZERO PERCENT CHANCE and you need to understand that and accept it.

As for leaving the elevators free for the firefighters, okay, here’s the deal. Unless your nearest fire station is literally right next door? Your first on scene fire truck is NOT likely to be there on scene and needing that elevator before you get to the ground. It takes us TIME to find the address, gear up, and drive to the building. Then we need to hoof it into where the elevators even ARE, so YOU HAVE TIME to use the elevator to get down to the ground floor... BUT ONLY IF THERE’S NOT A RUSH ON THE ELEVATOR! And THAT is WHY we don’t tell people this shit. That’s WHY we tell people to NEVER USE THE ELEVATOR... because every self-entitled asshole will use it because they don’t feel like walking, and then put YOU in danger by delaying the elevator’s arrival to you.

IF, however, the elevator IS compromised, or you just can’t get it to come for you, or whatever, and you either don’t have anyone with you who has the adrenaline fueled BALLS to be able to toss you over their shoulder and hoof it down the stairs with you - because, let’s face it, that is RARE AS FUCK, then HERE IS WHAT YOU DO:

You call 911 and tell the call taker that you are in the building that has a fire alarm going off, and you are not able to evacuate because of a physical disability, and you tell them what floor you are on, and EXACTLY what stairwell you are waiting at. And the very FIRST thing that the firefighters are going to do once they arrive, if it is, indeed, a REAL emergency, and not a false alarm, is come get your ass and bring you down. Whether that means carrying you down the stairs, or whether that means locking out the elevators so that no one else can override them and coming to get you themselves, they WILL come get you FIRST THING if it is a real event. And if it is a false alarm? You will probably be the first person who is not involved with the building to know, because the call-taker is going to stay on the line with you until you are under someone’s care and out of danger, or until the scene has been sorted out as real or false, and you are out of danger that way.

These are pretty standard operations in the fire service throughout the United States. There may be some minor variations based on specific municipalities, but, for the most part, this is pretty typical: LIFE BEFORE PROPERTY. So, as long as SOMEONE knows where you are - hence why you call 911 - Firefighters will come get you. You are NOT alone, and you have NOT been abandoned. I PROMISE. It’s like, our whole reason for doing the shit we do: to save lives and to break shit. Sometimes, we get lucky enough to do both at the same time.

High rise fires suck ass, and I always hated them. But the very FIRST thing I asked anytime we got one was if we had “any entrapments” - which is what we call anyone who could not self-evacuate for ANY reason. We ain’t leaving you behind. And yes, your friend who doesn’t have the stamina to carry you down can stay with you, too. Because I would never ask that of someone, honestly.

Also, just a little FYI... MOST fire alarms are false alarms. Not to make anyone complacent or anything, but, yeah. Most of them are either system malfunctions, someone accidentally hit a pull station, or someone burned popcorn in a break room. So don’t let a fire alarm freak you out until you need it to - by smelling or seeing smoke or flames.

i have had multiple nightmares about this very thing because NOBODY BOTHERS TO ACTUALLY TELL WHEELCHAIR USERS THIS STUFF

I am loving these additions!

If you're disabled, this is worth the time and focusing energy to read through!!!

Short version:

If disabled and the fire alarm is just happened, you're allowed to take the elevators down but there's a small possibility you could get stuck if the elevators are compromised.

If you can't use the elevators or don't want that risk, go to the stairwell which is reinforced against fire, close the doors, and call 911 to let them know you are in that particular stairwell and can't get down.

Fire will strongly prioritize finding and rescuing people who might be still in the building during any actual structure fire. This is a major component of their job.

Fire people won't arrive in the course of one elevator run and actually half the deal with "don't use elevators" is supposed to be "leave it for people who need it in the emergency" which is both fire AND disabled people.

identittykrisis

a fire is my worst nightmare as a disabled person, thank you to everyone who helped put this post together

specialagentartemis

Aro and ace activism is housing reform, is well-funded public housing, is an expansion of affordable housing, is allowing single people to get affordable and public housing, is rent controls to make it possible for single people to be able to afford to live alone on a single salary.

Aro and ace activism is healthcare reform, so that no one needs to rely on a spouse for health insurance, so that healthcare is available to everybody regardless of income, so that no one’s lived experiences or basic dignity are dismissed or overridden by doctors

Aro and ace activism is well-funded and expansive public transit, so that you don’t need to have someone on hand to drive you places if you are incapacitated, so that you don’t have to pay for an ambulance if you need to get to the hospital quickly

Aro and ace activism is disability and elder care services, so that no one needs a spouse to care for them, so that no one needs children to care for them, so that marriage is not a bind for disabled people, so that people on disability who want to and can live alone can

Aro and ace activism is community-building, it’s public events, it’s free social activities, it’s mutual aid, it’s activities that bring community members together without socializing relying on just a romantic partner

Aro and ace activism is developing a culture of believing when people tell you who they are and what they want rather than assuming you know them better than they know themselves

Aro and ace activism means a better world for people without “normative” desires or “normative” social support, which means a better world for everybody

sunny-draws-things

GUYS PIRATING IS BAD.

DO NOT PIRATE ANYTHING. NOT SHOWS/MOVIES. NOT GAMES OR SAFER GAMES. AND CERTAINLY NOT BOOKS. AND DO NOT DOWNLOAD YOUTUBE VIDEOS. AND NEVER EVER EVER WATCH MUSICALS WITHOUT GOING TO THEM AND DONT USE ADBLOCKERS/OTHER ADBLOCKER TO AVOID ADS AND VIRUSES PIRATING IS VERY HARMFUL TO THE CORPORATIONS WHO WORKS VERY HARD TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF PEOPLE AND THEIR MONEY. ANYONE WHO PIRATES IS BAD. BAD PIRATING. EVIL. OH AND THIS

dude honestly shout out to my guards i told them to seize this guy and before i could even finish my sentence they soze him. My goats

god DAMN there's no drug like a really good d&d session

our characters are just doing small errands after coming home off a long adventure, and there's huge lore drops, hints that the conses might soon quence, wholesome rp wherein we discuss becoming the robin hood of mafia families

we're out at a bar at 10:30 AM, and theres a cop down in the street clocking my character, and my artificer just knowingly hands me a wand of magic missiles like i'm going to need it

right, so,

quencing the conses, yeah? yours truly the clowngyaru gets utterly shitfaced bc i managed to roll a nat 1 with advantage, the warlock aide (whom my cleric - himself basically a warlock - got as a prize from the museum/library/prison in his deity's stomach) is being weird about my fighter, my mama's boyfriend's little shit seagull familiar is sitting at the bar stalking me, half the dockworkers union (read: the yakuza) come in for a drink and seem like they extra need it

we settle the tab and all home, except, wouldn't you know it! i took a wrong turn and end up in the semipermanent pop-up bazaar just in time for a grown-ass robot to get thrown clear through three stalls into me. all the muscle memory of being a star pitz player in high school hits at once, and i expertly thigh trap a 6'1" android like they're a ball.

this one actually isn't the consequences of my actions, bc it seems like my new friend in the duster is trying to non-lethally bounty hunt a fuckin red wizard of thay or whoever this dumbass mage is. the nerd super doesn't want us to kill him (which wasn't the plan to begin with, past tense intended) so he FIREBALLS THE ALLEY, CONE OF COLD'S US WHEN MY PAL DROPS A FOG CLOUD, THEN FIREBALLS AGAIN.

i knew i should have glocked him in round 1, but i was more focused on blocking for the mythril-plastic person to my left. two death saves successful, and then three utterly dogwater failures means

i'm fuckign dead again

and just like the first time i chose to just Not go stand before final judgment, i'm raised from the dead for the low, low price of do a little heist and bring them something nice

#im going to take the wrong lesson from this #you can come back to life as many times as you want to steal shit for someone #d&d campaign #d&d #dnd oc #vore #demicore #clowngyaru #angelboy #tinkerboy #stargirl #ghost thief

I liked this post, scrolled for like another minute before I went “SHIT FUCK SHIT” and scrolled back to reblog it

I always reblog this one when I see it on my dash. When someone posts their own art, writing, or music here they are really hoping you will share it.

god DAMN there's no drug like a really good d&d session

our characters are just doing small errands after coming home off a long adventure, and there's huge lore drops, hints that the conses might soon quence, wholesome rp wherein we discuss becoming the robin hood of mafia families

we're out at a bar at 10:30 AM, and theres a cop down in the street clocking my character, and my artificer just knowingly hands me a wand of magic missiles like i'm going to need it

#the cop is in the mob btw #the leader of the illithid gang wants to have a chat with me #the cleric's old character definitely killed a god's children and is in hell about it #and our current nemesis keeps showing up to steal parts of their gravestones basically #we know his name but he will always be Black Circleman to us like a kojima character #d&d #dnd oc #demicore #ttrpg character #ttrpg drabble

when i cooked up this silly little fortune telling spirit board minigame for my d&d group years ago, i did NOT think it was going to give me accurate readings every fuckin time

ok no so like,

when we ask "can the sphinx who watches over fate see us in the witch cottage" and the stone and bone that represent /indication and divination/ fALL OFF THE FUCKING BOARD!!?!

oh i guess i should post the game Sylvan Spirit Board

#d&d minigame #homebrew #ttrpg #indie ttrpg

when i cooked up this silly little fortune telling spirit board minigame for my d&d group years ago, i did NOT think it was going to give me accurate readings every fuckin time

ok no so like,

when we ask "can the sphinx who watches over fate see us in the witch cottage" and the stone and bone that represent /indication and divination/ fALL OFF THE FUCKING BOARD!!?!

#what do you mean spirit guide is on higher truth?#you're telling me that there's a passive energy of aversion in spring right after my spring eladrin pissed off the lady of the house

when i cooked up this silly little fortune telling spirit board minigame for my d&d group years ago, i did NOT think it was going to give me accurate readings every fuckin time

#dnd #d&d #like i wasn't expecting it to clock so hard #fortune teller #demicore #the spirit at large is a spirit medium sometimes #homebrew

everybody transgenderize their worldview right now

im so serious you have to kill the part of your brain that still equates bodies to gender until its gone on even a subconscious level. any body can belong to anyone it is actually so fucking crucial that you internalize this it is genuinely like. the base level.

paranormal-taters

hang on i need to review my entire post history from all time and make sure i haven't said anything embarrassing

paranormal-taters

awful news guys

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