It's Just Me.

Ashley. 31. Christian. Wife. Parent. Nerd. Writer.

[vexheart]

[ashlcymarie]

That's why, even when being nice, one must set clear boundaries. No one has to like those boundaries. Be brave enough to set them for you, for those you love, and not care what anyone else has to say about them.

[lovely-v]

It’s crazy and fucked up that being yourself is actually the solution.

[lovely-v]

It’s like. When I was told to “just be yourself” as a kid I thought it was a passive thing. Like oh easy I just have to sit here and be myself. but the reason so many people think that “being yourself” is bullshit advice is because you actually have to make active choices to do this and it WILL make your life way more fun. You have to wear t-shirts of bands that were popular ten years ago because you like them. You have to do your hair in a way that you find cute or comfortable even if it’s “so nineties”. If your friend says a food you enjoy is gross to them, you can’t be afraid to admit you casually disagree. You have to do hobbies that you’re interested in even if you’re bad at them and you cant feel like you have to get good at something before you tell people it’s an activity you do. You have to read manga and comic books in public and get piercings your relatives think are unattractive. You don’t have to tell people you dislike that you dislike them, but you don’t have to give them your time and attention either. You have to rewatch that kids show you’re nostalgic for even if you’re in your 30s. You have to change your name if you hate it, even if only a few close friends can know. You have to get fun girly drinks at the bar. You have to order hot chocolate when you don’t like coffee and black coffee when you don’t like sweet things. I am still bad at practicing this but it is the only way to make it all tolerable.

[lierdumoa]

First you have to realize that "yourself" is a construct built by the decisions you make. Then it becomes clear that being yourself is a deliberate and intentional practice, not a passive state of existence.

[ashlcymarie]

And one day, you realize that those who encouraged you to "be yourself" only wanted you to be the version of you that fit their ideals. You fit your own ideals now, and you are hated or, at the very least, talked about badly. And you have to be okay with that to move forward.

[elaiawrites]

Tomione recs under 30k

Wanted to post recs on fics that often get overlooked - ones that are under 30k words! While I love a good epic, these days I gravitate towards tightly plotted, shorter fics/one-shots that I can read just before bed or on the bus. These are some of my favorites and are all completed.

Set in Wizarding World:

Hard Worker by charingfae (one-shot, there's a tag of "noncon but he's pretty nice about it" lmaoo)

Delicacy by @obsidianpen (one-shot, noncon but he isn't nice about it lol, locket Tom, soooooo delicious, utter perfection)

A Crown of Dying Stars by @nofootprintsinsand (possibly one of the most beautiful fics i've ever read?)

Frame of Mind by Phantom_Fish (so haunting, author knows how to do psychological horror so well)

Scent of Surrender by @tippilo (one-shot, ABO! and ugh Tom is just so damn manipulative i love him)

antiobscurants by @tomioness (time travel, bamf hermione, so so good)

To Have and To Hold by @jinrosemoon (one-shot, Regency/Bridgerton-esque fic set with ballroom dancing - and a magical duel!)

The Black Veil by @nerysdax (an absolute classic, truly paved the way, centered around Samhain)

Muggle/Modern AUs:

THE VIRGO VS THE C WORD by desirable (a toxic situationship i wouldn't wish on my worst enemy)

you did some bad things, but i'm the worst of them by coffeepolaroid (a poker AU with the sexiest tension and banter!)

Forget Me Not by Shamelessly_Radiant (a serial killer is on the loose and hermione's new roommate is looking plenty suspicious)

R v. Riddle by @devdevlin (poor tom is accused of being a serial killer and lawyer hermione is sure he is innocent)

Hot Lips by @nauticalparamour (one-shot. phone sex. that is all.)

Murky Waters by @katsitting (an erotic horror that is sure to leave your mind spinning)

Scratch the Surface by backbiter (a murder mystery with snake! play!)

Retrograde by @artdepleurer (ok 300 words over but it's too good to not mention, casino worker Hermione with a magical realism twist you don't see coming)

The Eyes Are The Best Part by elaia (self-rec lmao head chef tom and foodie hermione what can i say)

Happy Reading! <3

[creativepromptsforwriting]

Reactions to... seeing their enemy

"I knew you would come. You're so predictable."

"So, it's finally time to officially meet?"

"Is this your idea of a joke? Because no one is laughing."

"Well, look who decided to show up. I was wondering when you'd finally make your move."

"I really hoped I wouldn't have to look at your face again."

"You? Here? Wouldn't have expected to see you here."

"Couldn't have known you would be here as well, could I?"

"Guess I can't avoid you forever. What's up? Another round?"

"I was starting to think you'd lost your nerve."

"Hmm. This is not good. This is really not good."

"And here you are again, playing the same old game. Pathetic."

"If that isn't my favourite enemy. My nemesis."

"What are you doing here? Did I miss the memo about our next epic fight happening at Starbucks?"

"You're here. Good. That makes it easier for me to finish what I started."

"Are you lost or just trying to get yourself killed?"

"If it's a fight you want, it's a fight you'll get."

"Wow, I didn't think you were capable of showing your face around here."

"You just won't stop, will you? After everything, you still think you've got something to prove?"

"You really can't leave me alone, can't you? Missed me so much?"

"Is this the best you can do? I thought you'd bring something worth my time."

"You're late. I can't work against an unreliable enemy. We all got other appointments after this."

"Look, if you're here to apologize, I'll let you know now, it's too late. But if you're here to fight, I'm all ears."

"I've been waiting for this. Let's see if you can still run your mouth when I'm through with you."

"Didn’t I tell you last time? You're going to regret this. Again."

"No one told me they would here as well. This is so awkward."

"You just don't know when to quit, do you?"

"I was hoping you'd show up. You always make things interesting."

"Back again? I'll admit, I'm impressed. You're either brave... or just plain stupid."

More:

Reactions to… Masterpost

Hero x Villain

Enemies to Lovers Masterpost

[ashlcymarie]

Heavy on the, "I really hoped I wouldn't have to look at your face again."

[writing-prompt-s]

A king who doesn't really want to and isn't able to run the kingdom properly catches wind of a noble woman who wants to kill him to take over and he realizes she is extremely competent so he decides to propose to her to save everyone the hassle and they have a surprisingly healthy relationship.

[l4422l-deactivated20180412]

It’s weird when you realize the person you once told everything to now has no idea what’s going on in your life

[curiousfancy]

After the gallant prince had rescued her from the tallest tower of the forgotten castle, and the city folk danced for seven days and seven nights to celebrate the royal wedding, the princess - now queen - gazed listlessly across the throne room and plotted her escape.

As dawn broke one summer morning she crept softshoed and silent through the ornamental garden, down to the tangle of untamed rhododendrons that hid the ruins of the old castle from prying eyes. Leaving the manicured palace grounds behind, she ran out into a familiar landscape - one that had been her world for seventeen long years. There, in the rocky cliffs studded with brilliant pink flowers, she stretched out her limbs to catch the rays of the rising sun and felt free for the first time that she could remember. No doubt a search would already be underway in the royal palace, and the princess turned queen had little time to waste.

Leaving the jewelled flowers behind her, she scaled the cliffs and looked to the far south under a brooding sky. Raising her arms then, she called to the Garuda, the race of giant birds who ruled the sky in myth and legend, and who were her sole companions during the long years of solitude. And when the answering cry came from afar, the solitary queen breathed a sigh of relief. Finally her real adventure, her fairytale, was about to begin.

If you enjoyed this video and story, support my work with a donation 🌺

[ashlcymarie]

The walls closing in on her are all too familiar. The world is tilting and she doesn’t know how to stop it. What triggered it? She’s still and silent as always when it’s happening. Her mind, though silent, is racing, nothing happened. Nothing happened for her to spiral, everything before was normal. So why does she feel like she’s being chased by a monster so foul the paint from the wall is peeling. 

She stands and the room spins, yet she walks like everything is fine. Everything is not in fact fine. Her hands shake and wrenching them together feels better than letting them be free to do their wildly upsetting dance. The world around her keeps going and she is not deaf to it. But things are muffled like she’s going through a tunnel or something. 

The tunnel isn’t dark as she walks but it isn’t light either. She responds when someone asks her a question, the part that makes her shine for others isn’t there in that moment. She’s pretty sure that no one’s noticed. She isn’t sure if she likes that or not. But it is. 

Ever so often she grabs the nearest surface and leans over until her head touches the cool surface, it is always cool. Somewhere in the back of her mind she chooses moments when people aren’t around her. Most often this works and no one notices. And when they do, she waves them away, and thankfully, they let her. 

Sometimes the medication she’s prescribed actually works because she finds the brain power required to take it. Other times, she lives in this moment for much longer than a person ever should. And in the moments where time isn’t slowed down, and her breathing is normal, she realizes that she needs help. She realizes that all of this is from trauma and that she’s not doing herself any favors when she’s lost in the tunnel. But she also realizes she doesn’t control the fact that she ends up in that tunnel. And the realization is the only thing that keeps her okay in between these moments.

[mionepls]

some might think i just have a bad boy/rebellion complex for shipping hermione w mostly slytherins & being an absolute sucker for gray/dark hermione...... but here’s the real reason!!!!!

(saw this on Strictly Dramione facebook group)

[of-stars-and-moon]

Me: *trying to sleep*

New fanfic idea that I’ll probably never write:

[ashlcymarie]

I’m being called out

[angelsaxis]

don’t blame states that go red on people not voting and blame it on literal generations of gerrymandering and voter suppression and the whole ass electoral college that y’all barely have a grasp on.

black people in the south vote blue and get shadowed out by white people that vote red. and then the state turns red. and then people yell at black people and nonvoters, all while ignoring radicals/leftists/progressives in southern states working harder than your average Blue state citizen to flip senate/house/local seats in any way they can. and then those blue state citizens will make jokes about innocent people dying in hurricanes and natural disasters and dying at the hands of the very structures they claim to be against. im so damn tired.

[today-only-happens-once]

To Tired Writers. To the people out there whose hearts very, very much want to write and work on WIPs, but who are just mentally and physically exhausted right now. It’s okay. It is okay to rest sometimes. Allow yourself time to rest. 

[ashlcymarie]

Little moments

All the moments mean something to her

But those little ones mean the most

Some of them seem to happen in a blur

And she’ll only remember when they’re immersed in a little moment that’s similar.

The moments leave Whispers on her skin like a ghost.

Yet they stick and stay so profoundly.

No matter where either of them goes.

They’re home.

These little moments are not like any fairy tail she’s read nor any movie she’s watched.

These little moments aren’t even like those she hears of from friends or sees mention of online. But they’re theirs. They’re unwatched, unmentioned, and she feels that’s a shame. Not that anyone’s to blame.

How does one Mention these moments? They’re so personal. She can’t really find the right words to give anyone that will do them justice. With each thought of it there’s a piece of her that unravels.

Little moments

Looks that only she understands

Words that seem brash to others

But she knows this man

Little moments

Talk that offends

Only she really knows where he’s been

Little moments

And all her love

Like never before

And never again

Little moments

She is his

He is hers

She is her own

And he is his own

And they’re one

Little moments that make this all possible

A leg thrown over hers

A kiss to her forehead

A back rub or head rub for him

These little moments that she lives for, cherishes again and again.

[love-me-a-good-prompt]

How do your character(s) sleep?

Do they go to bed early or stay up late?

When they say they’re “going to bed” do they actually mean they’re going to sleep or do they mean they’re going to read/play on their phone/etc in bed for a while?

What do they wear when they sleep? (if anything at all)

Do they watch/listen to anything to help them fall asleep?

Do they sleep with a night light on or prefer total darkness?

What position do they sleep in?

Do they cuddle/snuggle with anything while they sleep?

Do they have insomnia or do they fall asleep easily?

How many hours of sleep do they get?

Are they a heavy sleeper or a light sleeper?

[ashlcymarie]

She’s used to saying “I don’t sleep. I haven’t in years.”

But that’s not what she means

Sleep does not actually evade her

But it’s not a comfort to her either

The dreams

She wakes silently screaming, begging you not to leave her.

She says she doesn’t fear the dark

But the truth is she’s too afraid to see herself in the light, any light.

So they go off

And she lays down

Laying there, no sight, she can pretend her soul is unmarked.

Late to bed

Early to rise

The dreams still roaring regardless in her head

Why are you tired? The hallmark question of her life.

[whimsipop]

fuck it, seal fursona

[fluohrine]

[positivelockscreens]

Quote by Ditte Mia 💕💕