I write fics and shit

Part time author of South Park fanfiction. Full time Yelp reviewer.

[asteria7fics]

Oh, hey! How’d you get here?!

Welcome to my little corner of the internet!

⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

I’m Asteria, but my friends call me Teri and my pronouns are she/her!

Asks and DM's are always welcome! However…

I’m a grown adult, so please if you’re a minor that wants to interact with me, keep it to my ask box only! ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

Asks concerning when I will be posting fics will go unanswered. I’m sorry goobers, but I don’t have a regular posting schedule at the moment. Consider following me here and on AO3 to be notified when I post!

I write South Park fics and shit! Here’s what you can currently read on my ao3!

The Song of Broflovski (TSOB)

A parody/retelling of the Trojan War through the exploits of some small town fourth graders. Crass and silly and meant to closely mimic the feel of the show. Great for people who don’t like smut, but DO like toilet humor and kids that cuss!

Exactly Where I Left You (EWILY)

My take on a high school au with a little twist, complete with overly-dramatic teenaged angst, love triangles and sexual awakenings. This fic takes place within the same universe as TSOB, though that isn’t required reading to enjoy this story! Be warned though, this one does contain mild smut.

Remplir Sa Bouche (RSB)

A smut-heavy one-shot I cooked up one day, where Stan works as a private chef for Kyle and his wealthy family. This fic exists well outside of my typical universe, and outside of any concept of decency. If you dare take a bite, then I hope you’ll enjoy your meal. Bon appetite!

La Petite Mort (LPM)

The much anticipated (and equally smutty) sequel to RSB. The story of LPM was originally meant to be included in RSB, but was cut for the sake of keeping that story short. Please enjoy RSB as the appetizer, and LPM as the main course.

Momento Mori (MM)

A one-shot exploration of Kenny working as a mortician, working through regrets from his youth as he prepares the body of Butters’ father. No smut, but lots of gory details on the embalming process, if you’re into that sort of thing.

The Rebound (TR)

Another one-shot, this time seeing Stan and Kyle rekindle their friendship after separating for several years as Kyle pursues his dream of playing professional basketball. Pretty heavy smut, very minimal actual basketball. This fic takes place in the same universe as MM!

Other content:

EWILY Extras: Short stories that add to the story/context of EWILY! In chronological order:

The Beach Episode

Fartgate

It Happened in San Diego (PSST! EWILY comes after this one!)

In the Rear View Mirror

The One Where Stan Bottoms

You can listen to music I associate with the EWILY boys and their arcs on my Spotify!

The EWILY boys also got Pinterest boards! Featuring a WIP board for RSB/LPM (˵ ¬ᴗ¬˵)

Current WIPs:

Further explorations of the Private Chef AU

And many more ideas waiting for their turn in the oven!

(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

Since you’re still here, I’ll share some other things about me!

I’m a double Scorpio, Aries rising and INFP!

I primarily ship Style (or Stanky if you prefer) and Bunny, but I also dabble in Bendy and Yentlman. And Creek, of course. Canon kings.

Though South Park is my primary focus, I also like a lot of other cartoons! I’m also a big fan of Bojack Horseman, Moral Orel, Clone High (the first season rip), Futurama, Smiling Friends, ATLA, Castlevania, the list does kinda go on. Feel free to chat with me about other shows!

I am also an anime enjoyer, though I don’t keep up with a lot of the modern popular shows. Hands down my favorite shows have been Ouran High School Host Club, Black Butler (the manga is better hehe), Madoka Magica, Panty & Stocking, Spy Family, Aggretsuko and Clannad!

Very casual video game enjoyer. Some of my favorite games include TFBW (obviously!! A masterpiece!!), The OG Spyro trilogy, Bayonetta, Assassin’s Creed (especially Odyssey, you KNOW I’m a Classical Greece girly), and The Sims.

I listen to just about any kind of music, but I’m especially partial to pop-punk and k-pop. My absolutely faves of all time are BTS, Twice and FOB.

I’m not afraid to block people, or tags for that matter. Won’t yuck your yum (too much) but if I don’t wanna see it, I won’t be seeing it.

Thank you for reading this long-ass post! I hope you have fun here!!

[mtkay13]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

New Monchevy fic wooh! A little jump back in time to get a glimpse of Philippe d'Orléans' POV after the previous fic which was exclusively from the Chevalier's.

I also learned that you can have a nice AO3 embed link! crayzee!

[jihadibarbie]

genuinely me

[mtkmsp]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KYAHL PHEW RIGHT ON TIME THIS WAS TOTALLY PLANNED FOR 🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂🙂

[mtkay13]

I posted a fic! and it's the first of a long list most likely! (there's already another one in the process of being edited so yay!) here's the ao3 summary and link for anyone interested 👉👉

👉find it here 👈

happy reading 🙌

[asteria7fics]

Hey not my usual reblog but my brother from another motherland is deep in a fresh hyperfixation and is honestly absolutely cooking and has lowkey (highkey) converted me to a monchevy shipper as well so scope his shit because it's fun and I told you to ♡( ◡‿◡ )

[asteria7fics]

I often wonder if the fact that the au I pour the most time into is also my least canon compliant says something about my ability to write these people in character, and then I reread lines like "Kyle had a strong opinion" and I'm reminded that no, actually, I think I'm good.

[asteria7fics]

Hi Teri! Wishing you well my friend! How's the writing life treating you?

Hey, dude!

I have to tell you, writing has still been pretty slow. It’s been difficult to keep myself motivated, for a number of reasons, but I’m hoping I’ll come out of this funk soon enough and rediscover my love for it.

And you know, this is a fairly typical cycle for me. Not just with writing, with all of the hobbies I’ve picked up over my life. Most I’ve abandoned for years, then come back to when I’ve needed them, and it sort of sucks but I also think its good for me to exercise different parts of my brain from time to time.

Part of why I find myself moving away from certain hobbies is because I can get caught up in not feeling “good enough” at a given thing for pursuing it to be worth my time, which I know is silly but it can be difficult to pull myself out of that kind of rut. Thankfully, as it currently stands, I still feel pretty good about my writing, so I’m optimistic that my self doubt won’t get the better of me in the end.

I appreciate the check-in and well wishes, and I wish I had more exciting news to share! I hope all is well in your world!

[qulfij]

Wendy 🤗💓💓💓

[undying-princess]

knowing how it tends to go with male authors and their wives it was probably marge who wrote the odyssey

[stankys]

what people outside the sphere dont understand is that when south park is funny its fucking FUNNY. like you think i WANT to be here? theres an episode where cartman raps about wanting to kill himself

[southparkzine27]

🌲 CONTRIBUTOR SPOTLIGHT 🌲

You thought you'd seen the last of the mod team, did you? Think again! Let us re-introduce @asteria7fics into the contributor lineup—a true Kyle enjoyer!

🚸 Who's your favorite South Park character and why?

“Kyle! I relate to him on several levels, and I also find him to be one of the most compelling characters to explore.”

—Asteria

[boywithfish]

tagged by @faeriepollen :o) <3 i love you

rules: answer these questions & tag 9 people you'd like to know better

reading: nothing rn i'm doopit :( but the last book i read was I Who Have Never Known Men and i still think about it a lot!

last series: rewatching arcane >:)

last movie: The Truman Show (there are a lot of really "movieish" movies i haven't seen so i'm trying to catch up)

last song: probably You Lose by Magdalena Bay?? i bought a Mercurial World cd at the cutie music store today and we were listening to it in da car

working on: a diy music benefit show thingy for a local family impacted by ICE, my muscles, i was also working on a lil collage zine that i am hoping to scan and post here Soon

sweet or salty: i am a savory boy through and through

coffee or tea: i need coffee to function but i drink tea just for the love of the game

tagging: i have a lot of new mutuals!! here goes 🌀

@veggiescum @crow-dyke @whiplashtechnician @dirtring @teagan1205 @yeehawfemme @dykeyearning @slovelytoknowu @primetimedyke

[whiplashtechnician]

How cute ! Also hiiiiii I’ll add under this

rules: answer these questions & tag 9 people you'd like to know better

reading: geek feminist revolution, the wild edge of sorrow, and the new lesbian pulp!

last series: I’m rewatching euphoria and I am so bad at watching new things I mostly watch smosh Reddit stories 😭

last movie: twinless! I watched with my lavender boyfriend <3

last song: I listen to the radio a lot but on qobuz it was Bring Wet Cunt (my butch bait playlist)

working on: a self portrait I’m redoing from college! , some bag charms I just like giving to people, trying to sell my art also for people effected by ICE 😭

sweet or salty: I have a huge sweet tooth but I’m also crazy for anything pickled like in a. What im known for way

coffee or tea: i loveeeee tea i have so many teas (my fave is raspberry vanilla mint) but i also have a strange love for banana bread mochas

tagging: @seethersalt <3 @itaintfreeitslike1099 @lesbianismluvr @xo-tragician-xo @moofinjoji @delawarensis @efflaurescence @n0turg1rlfr1end @urvampirebutchboyfriend @violexnce

[efflaurescence]

tagged by the incredible @whiplashtechnician 🖤🛼 (& shoutout to OP for making this🩵)

rules: answer these questions & tag 9 people you'd like to know better

reading: about to start tender is the flesh by agustina bazterrica and/or bury our bones in the midnight soil!

last series: FTWD, trying to get into the pitt!

last movie: interstellar!! finally saw it after meaning to for many years

last song: Did I Say Too Much? by The Beaches

working on: my new coloring books, organizing my house & minecraft lmaooo

sweet or salty: always always always a salty girl, unless there’s an option to have lime flavored anything & then i’m there 🍋‍🟩

coffee or tea: coffee for sure, always icy as heck & a lil bit sweet, just had a cookies n cream cold brew today

tagging:@impertinent-starlight @juliuli @iffoundreturntoabbyanderson @saphicangel @janepinscher @lichenmoose @supersonic-scientist @natiisstillasecretagent @sapphire-to-the-rain (if you’re interested! if not, that’s ok!)

[impertinent-starlight]

tagged by: @efflaurescence (ty bff ❤️❤️)

rules: answer these questions & tag 9 people you'd like to know better

reading: catching fire (for the first time!!!), the death note manga, & this coven won’t burn by isabel sterling

last series: the amazing digital circus (ep 8 crushed me) & i’m currently rewatching euphoria to mentally prepare for season 3

last movie: us directed by jordan peele !! i watched it for the first time recently and i really fucked with it

last song: all my life by the foo fighters, love me my pop punk ❤️

working on: my janka college au & my jackieshauna texting fic (which i promise i will get back to working on college & taking care of my mental health is a pain in the ass)

sweet or salty: sweet 100%!! i love me some ice cream or candy fr

coffee or tea: coffee! i also love me some iced french vanilla half decaf from dunkin (the east coast in me is never leaving)

tagging: @cannibalzsasz @awesomewithoutme @forfearoftrying @austaylian @knightfaetality @essiebitssie @deathofabutch @blackbirdtrills

[blackbirdtrills]

Tagged by @impertinent-starlight (I appreciate it! 😁)

Reading:

Animorphs: The Reckoning (again) and also The Way Of Kings (I've heard enough good stuff about Stormlight Archive that I've gotta check it out

Last series:

Community, which me and my pal rewatch every year

And also

The Amazing Digital Circus, I've watched episode 8 four times now haha

Last movie:

Fight Club! My first watch. It was really interesting. I loved how twisty the plot was and I didn't even go in spoiled :)

Last song:

Warning Shot! Though honestly I listened to all of Lace Up before work

Working on:

Aacts 36! It's coming along nicely! Mostly an Eric and Heidi chapter with an important Liane scene in there too that was fun to write.

Sweet or salty:

Sweet!

Coffee or tea:

Sweet tea! One sip of unsweetened tea and I'm down for the count.

Tagging: @kikiomori @zoot-marimba @butters-flower-mom @asteria7fics @k-broflovski @silver--scar @weedle-testaburger @boxwinebaddie @meatgrinderboy

[boxwinebaddie]

Tagged by: @blackbirdtrills ( thank u mon ange :* )

Reading: happy to report that while my ocd still has writing ensnared in its cruel clunches, i have *slowly* dipping my toe back into the wonderful and healing tide pool that is reading. i actually just finished the folk of air series by holly black! ( the main character, jude, is such a badass – epic female lead, and cardan is just…pretty and useless, which is my fave thing for men to be. )

i downloaded the libby app and after crawling up from….thir…tee…nth place…i finally have the stolen heir ( the first book in holly’s second elfhame series ) and how the king of elfhame learned to hate stories ( you have no idea how hype i am for cardan pov ).

atm, a large part of my work in therapy hinges on trying to heal my inner child, so i am also looking forward to picking up some super girly coming of age romancey ya novels. so if you have any recommendations, please let me know! xx

Last series: last series i watched was actually hunterxhunter with my girlfriend! ( i know, i am also surprised that a tall beautiful scary goth girl chose a pint sized epic fail loser girl who writes south park fanfiction on the internet and dresses like a 14 year old boy! in your face MEN! ) my favorite comfort tv show is also masterchef and we watched season 14 together…and i am currently watching season 15 on my own. ( yes, she got mad at me. yes, i wanted to fall on my sword and die immediately for upsetting her. *stas vc* off to lie in the streets, boys! )

i want to re/watch more shoju anime though. i think i’m going to start with ohshc and fruits basket. i am also in the midst of finally watching nana. hachi asf.

Last movie: i actually just finished rewatching kiki’s delivery service, which is my FAVORITE hayao miyazaki movie. i think i am going to make it a personal mission to watch all of them.

Last song: right now, its actually this male punkrock/metal cover of birds of a feather by our last night which i have been looking for FOREVER. holyshit, birds of a feather is so remember core and that cover is just so crimson dawn core. as a personal form of comfort i have also been listening to lot of taylor swift, new, old, and actually i love sabrina carpenter! despite being a lesbian, short and sweet and man’s best friend are SO good to me. OBSESSED.

Working on: ooooougffh. so much. i keep wanting to work on completely refacing remember and fleshing out the plot from start to finish, filling in all plot holes, trying to give myself the whole enchilada instead of just obsessing over fragments

but…ocd is a sick bitch.

the way mine works is it creates certain conditions ( usually impossible ones ) that i must complete to be able to write or properly enjoy a past time, otherwise i can’t do it. if you have seen hxh, my fanfictions/the concept of writing/my fanfiction characters feel like they are behind a terrifyingly large curtain or barrier of evil nen, that i cannot cross. i am working on currently learning something like nen in exposure and response therapy for ocd, and hoping to one day be able to pass that barrier.

i also want to work on fleshing out the plot and world building for tkak and possibly that cars au just for fun. maybe…even peppermint. MAYBE. MAAAAYBE. but for now, i am just organizing the remember playlist and hoping to work up the nerve to answer your questions again. i miss you. hyh. <3

Sweet or salty: you know what!!! i am BOTH. i really like sweet-salty food combinations. like i really like sweet heat jams, hot honeys, berry hot sauces, seasalt caramel. i am not very picky with food, i am basically a garbage disposal like stan or kenny. my ocd flares up every once and a while and i feel like can’t eat the things i enjoy, but i fight it as often and as vigilantly as i can.

Coffee or tea: i really only drank coffee during my student teaching arc. black coffee too. purely as rocklet fuel, zero pleasure. i don’t really like the taste of coffee…but i LOVE tea! specifically chai tea and matcha!! my coffee order is often a matcha-chai hybrid. i also recently have been very into rose milk tea and it is my go to boba order!

Tagging: @pastorcraigenjoyer, @alwaysinstyle, @asteria7fics, tagging rant park and because the thing i loathed the most student teaching was popcorn styles of calling on students ( i feel like it forces children who do not feel comfortable or did not consent to speak, to speak, completely obliterating any kind of healthy boundary you set with them ) i am leaving the floor open to ANYONE! who wants to do this. if that’s you, go ahead and reblog it from me. <333

[asteria7fics]

I’ve been double tagged by @blackbirdtrills and @boxwinebaddie! I guess that means I have to put twice the effort in, huh?

Reading: Truthfully, absolutely nothing. Unless you count neurotically rereading my current WIP… but in all seriousness I’m actually not much of a reader. I enjoy it occasionally but it’s not my media of choice.

Last Series: I’m currently watching The Apothecary Diaries, but the last shows I got caught up on were The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives (yummy I love trash) and The Bear, which the latter was recommended to me a million times and for good reason! I’m very excited for the next season!

Last Movie: Yikes, uh… Does the new BTS documentary on Netflix count? Otherwise, probably a corny Christmas movie. I don’t watch a ton of movies, either.

Last Song: King for a Day by Pierce the Veil, because I needed a pop punk energy boost to get my chores done but otherwise I’ve been listening to a ton of different stuff. Lots of K-pop, American pop and some goodies from the 80’s.

Working On: The same WIP that I’ve been chipping away at for… holy shit, according to document details I started this thing all the way back in July of 2024?? Okay, well… there’s that, and I’ve also been working with some really cool people on this zine: @southparkzine27, which you should absolutely consider supporting once preorders open in a few months!

Sweet or Salty: Both, together if possible!

Coffee or Tea: Tea, but I really only enjoy chai and a few herbal teas.

Tagging: Well, since it took a double tag to get me here I have to make sure @alwaysinstyle has the same pressure hehehe, and I think @mantequillamcwhoremick and @beatlefreakfour should give it a go as well!

[sosoubrette]

and yes they still smoke weed 𓁹‿𓁹

[mtkmsp]

And My final submission for Kenny's birthday! 🎈🎈🎈🎉🎉🎉

HBD Kenny and yay for a really fun Kenny week!

[mtkmsp]

My second entry for Kenny Week!

The theme was kindness and of course I immediately think of Kenny and Karen's relationship hehe. I think about how much Kenny wanted to be a princess and I think it's sweet to imagine him letting Karen be the queen.

[lowqualitysouthparkpics]

[mtkmsp]

Made this for Kenny Week 2026 that's hosted over on twitter! I didn't see anything about it here but here we go nonetheless ✨✨✨✨