Hi my username used to be sarablq. It’s autisticbowuigi now. Hope this helps!

Kiana Khansmith
Jules of Nature

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Cosimo Galluzzi
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Cosmic Funnies

if i look back, i am lost
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izzy's playlists!
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@autisticbowuigi
Hi my username used to be sarablq. It’s autisticbowuigi now. Hope this helps!
They were right, I didn’t expect that.
@autisticbowuigi
avg book club session btw
I couldn’t stop on Yata and turned the other two into birds as well 🥴
Species names and explanations under the cut!
If you misuse the term "purity culture" to be about your ship wars instead of about the abuse and sexualization of teen girls then imagine me doing this to you
on autism and isolation
My FireRed team :) Wigglied
get buggyd
i have got to get my father to sit down and focus and actually watch some portion of HLVRAI before he dies. im constantly haunted by the knowledge that all this incredibly innovative, completely grassroots improvisational theater--which is frankly some of the most cutting edge "new media" that currently exists and gets zero credit from academia or the larger art world for it because you have to be an exact 50/50 hybrid of annoying shakespeare college guy and annoying extremely online guy to understand what's even going on--is happening ON TWITCH for an audience of people who, while appreciative, are only experiencing it in the context of it being a "[a joke about a] video game stream". there should be regular columns in the New Yorker about stuff like Jerma's Dollhouse stream, one of the most well-known pieces of performance art in the classical sense that currently exists. it just bugs me. i dont know what to do about it. i used to be able to get paid to write really long articles about stuff like this in Kotaku and Wired etc but there's no readership for that either, and there wasn't then. no matter who im trying to explain how groundbreaking this stuff is to, they will need like a 30 minute preamble about either the world history of live theater traditions, or why the joke a gnome just said originated on the Something Awful forums in 2004 and why it matters.
of the two types of annoying guy you have to be to get this particular angle on this medium, the theater people are the ones who are going to get more out of it with much less explanation, but when you spec out of academia you lose touch with that peer group except for the other dilettantes, who are extremely few and far between. there's nothing anyone can do about this except vaguely plan on writing a book someday
for the first time ever in human history we are experiencing as an audience an improvised, live, ensemble theater production from the first person perspective of one of the actors. there should be a new paper about this on Academia.edu every week!!! its a big deal!!
me trying to explain to a theater person why someone is trying to distract Gordon and keep his field of view pointed a certain way while they delete the Lanky Kong prop they just spawned behind him by accident: its like that scene in A Night At The Opera where Harpo climbs the matte paintings during Il trovatore and drops the Potemkin(?) backdrop behind the Anvil Chorus
them: ohhh i get it. lmao
me trying to explain to the average twitch viewer why they keep calling the Vortigaunts "Vonneguts": so first up have you ever read "a book"?
them: no
To be honest, if your knee-jerk response to a general critique of how incest, pedophilia, and rape culture can be perpetuated even through play, like fiction and kink is, "SO YOU’RE SAYING EVERYONE WHO READS XYZ IS A PEDOPHILE AND ENJOYING CNC MAKES ME A RAPIST AND I SHOULD BURN IN HELL?!?!?!?!? PURITAN!!!!!! OP IS AN ANTISHIPPING PURITAN WHO IS CENSORING US!!!!!!" You gotta unpack that.
No, I'm not saying that having that reaction means you are inherently evil. Nor am I saying that consuming a text or engaging with a fantasy automatically equates to real-world desire or intent. What I am saying is that leaping to "you're accusing me personally of being a monster" screams insecurity. It seems like you're afraid of being morally condemned, so you're projecting that onto anything that triggers a feeling of shame.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that a lot of the people fearmongering about "puriteens" this are frequently people who grew up in specifically American Christian communities or households, especially with the way they assume this is the norm for everyone else. If you were raised in an environment where "this is bad" basically meant "YOU are bad, repent" then hearing any kind of discussion seemingly condemning the things that you enjoy, even coming from a different place entirely, can feel familiar. Especially if it asks you to reflect on yourself in any way.
But since this hasn't been fully unpacked, people can end up recreating the same puritan moral structure on a different axis. Instead of "moral purity" being achieved through restriction and repetents, it becomes achieved through a performative posturing of "letting people do what they want." Criticism itself is basically impure contamination, because it's "telling us what to do," which becomes "impure," which becomes "evil."
That’s the same black-and-white, no-nuance moral reasoning. Just inverted to be countercultural to the harmful Puritanical beliefs, without actually taking away what makes them harmful to begin with. But counterculture isn't automatically progressive- shutting down discussion of rape culture and its normalization, just because thinking about it makes you feel bad, is, in fact, quite regressive.
It's a mentality based on "anything that makes me feel icky is evil."
Kinda like Puritanism.
Sorry, there's something I actually want to clarify/expand on. I may have worded this poorly so I want to clarify:
Pedophilia itself is not counter culture. It's already part of rape culture, which IS the culture. When I refereed to it as such here, I meant under very specific conditions where people are using the concept to be edgy/shocking to the people who clutch their pearls at the notion.
Please make no mistake, this contradiction is the point. Most of the ultra religious American Christian "Puritans" who are, on paper, very anti-pedophile (When creating a characterized villain out of the notion of The Pedophile who lurks in the shadows and prays on children, often based on transphobic, specifically transmisogynistic, stereotypes) are actually very pro-pedophilia and rape culture, because both this and an idealized childhood "purity" are used as tools for the patriarchy and fascism. (And of course this notion of childhood purity has pedophilic connotations as well) and this works together with the regressive ideas presented above.
We live in a patriarchal world where youth is treated as the ideal of desirability, where adults are socially permitted to feel entitled to children's bodies, where children can be adultified as an excuse to avoid responsibility in sexualizing them, where "choice" feminism gets applied without serious age-and-power analysis, where girls in particular are trapped in a double bind, where they're either whores or madonnas, where women are seen as unfuckable and worthless once they stop looking "barely legal," where status and authority protect abusers and pedophiles, where families use privacy as a tool for isolation and incestuous abuse, where children are treated more as property of their parents than as people with rights, where youth is commodified as an eroticized aesthetic to consume, where sex education gaps leave young people without language and tools to recognize or report ongoing harm, where coming forward about abuse is punished through social shaming and accusations of defamation, where "purity politics" (sexual purity, national purity, traditional family purity) overlap with these dynamics by casting women and children's bodies are something to display and regulate as symbols of purity, where the law enforces patriarchal hierarchy and obedience through surveillance and brutality, where children are abused at every level of society from the household to Hollywood to the church to a private island, where a children book's author can dedicate her life to creating laws to harm trans women by painting them as predators while at the same time being in cahoots with powerful pedophiles, where domination is seen as strength, where this is rewarded and protected by powerful men, where even men without power are taught to emulate these dynamics in their day-to-day life because that's how masculinity and power has been taught to them, where men and boys are raped in order to emasculate them, where people- men, women, and children, in wartorn countries are being tortured and raped for the sake of humiliation and degradation, where the "leader of the free world" gets to be an unabashed rapist pedophile with no consequences, where rape is about power, where rape is the tool of fascism.
And that's why it's frustrating when you log into Tumblr and people are like "actually pedophilia and rape and incest are Progressive (which makes it Pure) because uhhh I write fanfiction and censorship is bad and uhhh... it's bad to be mean to me so this is social murder and ummm... This is kinkshaming so you're a puritan basically. And also it's transphobic because trans people are pedos right? No that doesn't reflect any transphobic propaganda, and I'm not just using you as a scapegoat!"
Rape culture is not counterculture. It feels rebellious because it's edgy but that's where it ends. No matter how hard you try to dress it up it as something progressive, it's just not.
We should be able to talk about how these are things that heavily permeate our society, and the way that they will leak into the way that we deal with such subjects in fiction and fantasy as well. If you're an adult you should be able to understand this much without getting defensive.
Stop shutting down these conversations just because it makes you feel bad about your fetish. You can do that on your own time. The rape culture continuum shouldn't be perpetuated just because you have a guilt complex. It's an issue not because of the fictional scenarios you enjoy, but because of your insistence that it can never mean anything, and actively, loudly advocating for any further discussion to be shut down. You are a willing cog in the machine.
Friendly reminder that you should
Write that fic
Draw your OC
Redesign that blorbo
Plan that comic how you want
Create the content you want to see
Be cringe
Be free
The only thing that matters is you having fun! Not what others think!
i was thinking tonight about ferdinand, the kid’s picture book, and i think it was one of the first stories ever where i read it and was able to recognize myself in it. like, where a character clicked with me in a way beyond just thinking they were cool or nice or something. on a reread, it made me feel very soft.
i, too, would like to just go home and sit under my shaded little spot under a tree even though folks seem to find it fun to try to get a rise out of me.
I have been thinking about the muppets a lot and i like to think Walter is very very happy watching them on the stage again
flowey sketchpage i drew powered by pure pettiness and spite.
Magma doodles again
it can’t have been 10 years already. (isn’t it scary, to think there’s a highest number?)
i’m late to the party as always but hey that anniversary stream huh
best friends