imagine being a straight

[averymiaou]

I might occasionally flop around on here again to look at stupid meme nonsense tbh

[afterword]

i got the most relatable spam email

[averymiaou]

i havent been on here in 80000000 years

[the-half-elf-disaster]

View this post on Instagram

[tonightweredrinkingfromthebong]

wow, look at this! the overhanging leaves.. on the shoreline are pretTHERES A CRAB

[adrian714-deactivated20200501]

[edgebug]

there’s an angel hogging my blankets

[edgebug]

cheddar biscuit is going to be so proud when i tell her how many notes her pictures have

[dinovia-grant]

Wait.  Wait…

Her name is Cheddar Biscuit????

That is so perfect.  I might have to lie down for a week.

[edgebug]

every day when my dad comes home from work he feeds her pieces of ham. incidentally, she has a weird squeaky gravelly little meow, so it kind of sounds like she’s shouting “ham?! ham?!” whenever he comes home she runs to the door and shouts “haaaaaam?!” and it’s the best thing

[honeyswtfits]

I love her.

[jotun-philosopher]

@spamberguesa

[nightinngales]

somebody: i changed urls–

me, who hasn’t been able to recognize anyone on my dash for years:

[theslightsaber]

@bethanny-esda 👀

[funkyfartmaster]

the best pranks are the super harmless ones

like why would you pull someones pants down in public or like put them in danger or humiliate them when you can just baffle them by leaving tiny plastic camels all over their house or taping bill cosby’s face over every single face in  every picture in their house?

[jaberwockinthesun]

Last year the seniors had a mariachi band follow the principle for 3 hours

[killervanilla]

Confuse, don’t abuse ;)

[amazingbees]

MY NEW MOTTO

[latter-ace-saint]

The best prank I ever pulled was to a college roommate. April 1st was approaching, and I told my roommate that I was going to prank him. He responded that he had classes that morning and afternoon and a gaming group that night and that we wouldn’t even see each other that day. I responded that his room wasn’t going anywhere. He said he would just lock his room and there was nothing I could do about it.

What he didn’t know is that I had a key to his room.

So, on the evening of April 1, I unlocked his door, left it barely ajar, and did absolutely nothing else.

When my roommate got back that night, I heard him go to his door, say “oh no” in a horrified way, and carefully enter his room.

He then spent a good hour searching his room (fruitlessly, obvs) for pranks.

I’ll never do better than that.

[paulsrockinpagoda]

Visit Original Link

so i used something called infinite jukebox to cut out every other beat of this song and

well

here ya go

250 miles

[johnthedragon]

I’m having a fucking stroke

[sjaukes]

*vaguely scottish noises*

[weeniebagel]

[loserwhowatchesanime]

[dutchstore]

These floral boxers are bloomin lovely and now available at dutchstore.me! 

[striikee]

I WAAAANNNTTTT

[peony-pleasure]

If I was a boy I would wear these, these are hella cute

[passionpeachy-deactivated202312]

it just snowed in south texas for the first time since 2004 and everyone’s losing their goddamn minds it wasn’t even an inch deep it was like 0.1 inches but our weather is almost always in the high 80’s year around I’m always sweating my ass off so no one fucking kill my excitement with a “oh haha that’s like summer in chicago” because I DO NOT care some of us have never seen snow in our lives and I’m nuttin rn and I built a shitty fucking snowman

[passionpeachy-deactivated202312]

jsyk…my shitty snowman looks like hello kitty on a pregnant woman’s body… do u want to see

[author-avatar]

As a Chicagoan, I really wanna see this legendary Texas snowman

[passionpeachy-deactivated202312]

hhaeurrrggghhhh….it’s me, howdy kotter…..and I’m 37 months overdue

[sagevibes]

Merry crisis from SE Texas

[passionpeachy-deactivated202312]

Raw South Texas Power

[earthmorgue]

confy

[homunculus-argument]

the universe: okay, you’re a human. I gave you free will and a conscious mind, so you’re free to do whatever you want. So what do you wanna do?

human: GO FAST

the universe: well, you’re a perfect pursuit predator but if that’s the way you want to evolve, go ahead.

human, climbing on a horse: GO FAST

the universe: wait what

human, inventing the carriage, the car and the bullet train: GO FASTER

the universe: I IMPLORE YOU TO STOP

human, trying to figure out lightspeed travel: FAS T ER

[abstractandedgyname]

human: 

THEORETICALLY MAXIMUM FAST

the universe:

[im-just-a-reaction]

How will the people in the ship not get gibbed?

[armedandgayngerous]

Because the warp drive doesn’t actually accelerate the ship, it just makes the space in front of it smaller and the space behind it larger. Or something.

[unlimited-shitpost-works-deacti]

it works like this

Objects cannot accelerate to the speed of light within normal spacetime; instead, the Alcubierre drive shifts space around an object so that the object would arrive at its destination faster than light would in normal space without breaking any physical laws.

[triss19]

A WRINKLE IN TIME IS COMING TRUE 

[fedkaczynski]

We gonna be surfing gravity waves!!

COWABUNGA SPACE DUDES!

[beans345-deactivated20211127]

I love how mankind’s solution to ftl is just to bend to rules of reality a little.

Universe: ok human, with the physical laws as they are you can’t go faster than the speed of light.

Humanity: ok, let me just figure out how to manipulate space time so I can go FASTER!

[ciswhitethin]

That’s literally how the ship in Futurama works lol the professor says the ship doesn’t move at all, it moves all of space around it. Can’t believe Futurama was right

[honorarytenenbaum]

oh my god do people here like toto’s africa ironically? but… i genuinely love it. jt’s so good.

[officialjared19]

Reblog if u genuinely love Africa by toto