[swagophile]

important reminder that most people you follow online are significantly lamer than you think they are including me. and if you feel insecure comparing yourself to someone online: DON'T. theyre probably also lame and weird. most people on the internet are

[most-sane-classicist]

reblog if you're also lame and weird.

[bonivers]

going on a guilt trip do yall want anything

[secondbeatsongs]

if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask

[wizardshark]

99% of queer discourse stops right before they define the true difference between bisexual and pansexual!

[saspitite]

FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME

BISEXUALS GROW FROM THE GROUND

PANSEXUALS GROW FROM THE CEILING

[elizapad]

Happy Pride, cave dwellers 🦇

[mentha-vacciniumrainbow]

As a proud bisexual, I'm rebblogging this.

[kira-7]

This is a spot from an italian estate agency (we are governed by the right-wing party)

The woman says "Ridiculous..."

If you want to spread it elsewhere, here's the official link

[arctic-hands]

[Video Description: An ad with piano music over it all, showing an elderly woman in her home, knitting, when two younger men walk by her window, which catches her attention. She stares out her window at them as they kiss each other while walking, the old lady staring in disbelief. Cut to the old woman approaching a residence with a broom in hand, staring up at the second floor window where a small rainbow Pride flag is hanging. The old woman stares up at it and mutters "Ridiculo", before getting up on a ladder with her broom to remove the flag. Focus on the flag fluttering to the ground as church bells chime. The scene then cuts to the couple from before, approaching their home with grocery bags in hand before one stops and stares at the second floor, stopping his partner who then drops the groceries as he too stares up. It's then revealed that the small pride flag had been replaced with a gigantic, hand-knit pride flag. It then cuts back to the old woman's home, where a tin of rainbow-colored yarn sits on her table. The hands of the old woman are holding and fondly touching an old black and white photo of two young smiling women, leaning against each other. Cut to the old woman's face as she stares out with a look of happy pride on her face. At the end of the video, the name "Idealista" appears on screen, followed by "buon pride" along with a rainbow. End VD.]

[spaceofentropy]

One correction:

The old lady is not in her home. She is at work. She's meant to be what in Italian is called "la portinaia", aka a cross between a doorwoman and cleaner of a residential building. She's in her small "office" space, at the entrance of the building, from where she can survey the coming and goings of the inhabitants. It's a job that has mostly disappeared, but is culturally very clear to us as having the connotation of "potentially gossipy, one-million-percent judgmental woman who sees everything that goes on in the apartment complex, knows everyone and their secrets, and has Strong Opinions™️".

In this case, thankfully, the Strong Opinion™️ is that those two men are ridiculous with their teeny tiny flag for ants.

[targetedknowledge]

[mevil]

can zelda get him pregnant already damn

[stupidwiiisdom-deactivated20230]

WHAT

[mevil]

can zelda (the princess of hyrule) get him (link the hero of legend) pregnant (cute 🥰) already damn (profanity)

[eisenkrahe]

[flipocrite]

not she berry or he berry but no berry

and that is berry good

[gallusrostromegalus]

A cat is a machine that turns proteins into violence.

[starathsbunker]

#Helios was declawed by his former owners so he doesn't just slap things he dislikes like most cats#he really only feels confident in hissing at them#Especially because a lot of the thing he doesn't like are bugs and those are sharp sometimes :(#Selene has figured this out and now when she hears him hiss she sprints over the kill the fuck out of the bug#Helios has learned she will do this so he'll hiss at stuff louder and louder until she hears him#A nervous old man and his emotional support homicidal maniac tags by @gallusrostromegalus

I couldn't reblog without the tags because the context is hilarious

[gallusrostromegalus]

A Nervous Old Man (right) and his Emotional Support Violence Machine (Left)

Yes, he is more than twice her size. Yes, he is five times her age. Yes, he cries like a big baby until she kills Unacceptable Scary Things (earwigs) for him.

[teaboot]

Me: Hey, I'm so-and-so, just calling because my brother ate here, and he ordered the clams? And I just wanted to give you a heads up that he's got really, really bad food poisoning.

Worker: We order everything fresh from a reliable source.

Me: That's great, I just wanted to let you know just in case.

Worker: Well it couldn't have been us, we follow a very strict procedure.

Me: ....Okay, yeah, I'm not looking for compensation or anything. It could have been something else. I just wanted to give you guys a heads up in case, I don't know, something happened in transit, or someone has the flu or something.

Worker: They don't. We don't do that.

Me: ......

Me: Okay well like I said, I'm not calling to complain, we're just covering our bases. Thanks though.

Worker: Okay. Have a good one.

Me: You too

*click*

Me to my brother: They say it wasn't them

My brother, still hunched over on his porcelain throne five hours deep into solo level grinding a toilet+bucket X2 combo breaker marathon for the title of King Shits, Lord and Ruler of the Bon Bon Von Püpenshittën Empire: it's fine

[animentality]

[beardedmrbean]

[beardedmrbean]

[byjove]

For my 12th birthday, my parents took me to Washington DC because I was a huge nerd and I wanted to see the elephant shrews at the national zoo and I wanted to visit the Smithsonian. It was a terrible trip. Unbeknownst to me, my mother had recently found out my father was cheating on her, my (now lifelong) depression was beginning to kick in, my mom and I came down with a terrible cold at the beginning of the week and the vibes in the hotel room were miserable. I was so unhappy I cried. Walking around museums is a lot less fun when your nose is running like a faucet and you’re so tired and you want to go to bed but that means you’ll be trapped in a room with your parents who hate each other. To top it all off, the small mammal house at the national museum was CLOSED. All suffering, no shrews. Still haven’t seen an elephant shrew in person and I’m 25.

There was a group of 5 or 6 middle aged Japanese men staying in the same hotel as us. I don’t know if this was a boy’s trip or if they were there on business and working hard while they were playing hard but they were having a GREAT time. We kept bumping into them because we were staying in the same hotel and doing a lot of the same touristy activities and they seemed to be having the time of their lives every time we saw them. They had a visible lust for life I cannot put into words. I had traveled one state over and I was so miserable and just wanted to go home and they had come from across the globe and seemed to be on the trip of a lifetime and it occurred to me that yes, DC is beautiful, America is a vast and interesting place and if I got out of my own head, I could enjoy it in the way they were enjoying it.

[byjove]

This is what the footage of people from abroad exploring America during the World Cup has made me think of, I need to get out of my depressed 12 year old boy incapable of experiencing joy mindset, you have to love the place and people around you to want to help.

[byjove]

YOU have got to get in that Scottish guy experiencing Boston for the first time mindset, you have got to summon that 50 year old Japanese man in DC with 5 of his closest friends type of love for the world.

[libraford]

Googled something about quick hydration and it suggested big jug of water, couple tbsp pickle juice, dash of lime juice.

Its surprisingly tasty????

[libraford]

Pleased to report that after a day of this i am not longer craving caper brine and my mouth is not dry as usual. There's some good suggestions in the notes too that I want to try.

-ancient roman posca: water, red or white wine vinegar, honey, salt, herbs (coriander, mint, thyme)

-switchel: water, ginger, vinegar, sweetener, lemon, salt

-ayran: yogurt, water, salt, mint

-Agua pepino: water, cucumbers, lime, sugar, optional mint.

[libraford]

I have been reminded of:

-shrub: vinegar, sida water, elderberry (or other berry), sugar.

[libraford]

I have now been informed of

-sekanjabin: honey, vinegar, mint, water.

[libraford]

"Wow, I wonder why this post was popular this week."

-sees the reports of the heatwave in Europe-

"... ah."

[swan2swan]

Where's that tweet about how American chants are "let's go [team name] and some other country (Irish?) fans are "I've made up a song about the other team's drinking problem to the tune of London Bridge Is Falling Down one two three"?

[luimnigh]

[ladydevoir]

[megamindsupremacy]

Beautiful dash pull

[smalllfieldmouse]

my ex used to get pissed off every time i showed them this video they would be like "that's not how a train works" really angrily and storm out of the room

[smalllfieldmouse]

everyones gotta stop reblogging this bro they're gonna find it and get so mad they try to strangle me again