@awkwardnasa - Tumblr Blog

To the Person Who Asked If I Was OK

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God I miss the days when you could show up to a stranger’s farm and he’d say “What’s your name, boy?” and you’d take off your hat and hold it to your chest to better let him see your face and reply “Why I ain’t got none, sir, on account of my mammy passed on before she could give me one” and he’d tell you he’s real damn sorry to hear that and ask what he can do you for and you’d tell him that you can’t read nor even write neither but you’re mighty good with horses and can mend them fallen fence posts what you saw on your way in and won’t ask for nothing much more than a hot meal and a warm barn to sleep in and he’d keep his wife and daughters inside but send his boy who ain’t got married yet even though his mama tells him he needs a woman out with a lantern and some stew at night and the two of you’d get to talkin and he’d throw you his flask to take a swig from and watch you drinkin from it while he leant against the door frame and when he finally got called back on up to the house again he’d take a sip from it too real slow-like like it weren’t the whiskey what he were tryna savour

argumate

you see you don’t get posts like this on twitter

lastweekseyeliner

every day at least once while on a walk i think to myself “it weren’t the whiskey what he were tryna savour” and sometimes if i am alone i say it out loud

copperbadge

On Saturday I said to my partner, as I have said for months, "A ten thousand dollar a year raise would solve so many of my problems."

As of this morning I was reluctantly looking for jobs because I love my job and don't want to leave it, but see: $10k raise problem solver.

As of noon today this was no longer an issue, because my boss called me with the news that I was getting a $10K merit raise.

I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. This is roughly $200 extra per paycheck. Enough to pay off debt faster, rebuild my savings, and spend a weekend a month in Milwaukee getting obscenely laid. The sex I'm going to have on $200 extra per paycheck. You can't even.

May all of you get the $10K raise your soul has yearned for. And whatever level of sex you can be satisfied with for $200.

vergess

hey bestie i think ur post might be charmed 'cause you aren't gonna fuckin believe what happened today

isawken

getting increasingly confused trying to have sex with my point and click wife but she just keeps saying “you cant use that here”

isawken

i have the ancient sarcophagus and the cuckoo clock. what the fuck else do i need man

novafigura

foeofcolor

Only day you can rb this

foeofcolor

This post is like a fucking rosetta stone I've had the same theme song tagged in at least 6 languages so far

grimeclown

“hi welcome to mcdonalds what can i get for you?”

“yeah can i get a deluxe quarter pounder with cheese?”

“absolutely, do you want the meal or just the sandwich?’

“uuuuuh hold on”

*fishes something out of my pocket*

“mikey what do i do?”

“get the fries. youll need the energy in the coming days”

*stuffs it back in my pocket*

“uhh yes please the meal would be great”

texcritterspizzajamboree

serious question: can anyone else see this post? am I hallucinating?

meme-loving-stuck

this is like Schrodinger’s fucking meme because half the time the pic is deleted and the other half it’s visible

kaban-bang

northirish

Noooooooo dont say that!! im 29 and i keep telling myself i just need to make it to my 30s and everything will be better 😭😭

LIFE ONLY GETS BETTER IF YOU TAKE AGENCY OF YOUR OWN PERSONHOOD AND ACTIVELY TAKE STEPS TO BETTER YOUR OWN STATE OF AFFAIRS. AGE IS IRRELEVANT, ONLY THE WILL TO COMMIT TO A BETTER TOMORROW MATTERS

tawghasa

Living in the wrong timsezone to notice when the hellsite is down - just like old times 🥹

powerbottombrucespringsteen

I can’t believe we’re doing a site-wide retrospective on Dr. Roberta Bobby tweets and nobody’s mentioned the all time greatest one:

gumi-megpoidd

"theyre giving he man pronouns" is one of the funniest things ive heard recently. i cant stop thinking about it. he man. the man with a pronoun in his name. he. theyre giving he man pronouns. incredible

swamp-spirit

My dog's really a study in Buddhism. He can see my muffin wrapper and he's miserable. Crying. He needs to eat my muffin wrapper so bad.

I get up and throw it away. He forgets about it immediately and happily goes to sleep.

You are not sad because you do not have a muffin wrapper, my beautiful boy, you are sad because you want the muffin wrapper.

irreparableinnocence

I always refer to one of my cats as my Lacanian kitty. She will meow incredibly insistently for something, and once it is given to her, she will look at it briefly, decide she dgaf, and continue to demand something. Nothing existing could ever satisfy her desire because it is a metonymic manifestation of a lack that is inherent to the structure of her being, she is not asking for my sandwich, she is asking for something else via sandwich, and once proven that the sandwich isn't that something else she will desire another thing in the same vain hope.

wizardpotions

Advice I think transmasc people and especially people questioning if they might be transmasc really need but is so difficult to talk about is when thinking that you might not be a cis woman it is so important to do a quick misogyny check before moving forward.

i am by no means saying this to invalidate anyones transness or claim that transmascs are self hating women, there is just a really worrying trend i see in the way a lot of transmasc people talk about women

i am begging you to make sure that you do not allow yourself to project your dysphoria onto women, make sure that you are transitioning because you *want* to realise yourself in a gender that brings you joy, and not because you hate something about womanhood.

wizardpotions

and ESPECIALLY do not allow yourself to pit yourself agains trans women, they are your sisters, they are part of your community never ever let anyone make you think or act otherwise

wizardpotions

this is ok to reblog infact i encourage you to do so

st-just

I mean I don't even really think soullmates are an especially compelling idea in fiction, either (I have written about this at length). But like, opinions clearly differ. The important thing is that they ARE NOT REAL.

no-sharks-on-the-sun

soulmates ARE real but the algorithm's a bit messy - my soulmate was a 17th century chinese scribe and we've actually managed to recover a fragment of a really beautiful poem she wrote about the me-shaped hole in her heart. that's a lot more than most people get - we're still narrowing it down a bit but my buddy's soulmate was a hunter-gatherer from around 60,000 years ago, which is a rough draw.

frankly, the handful of destined couples who do get born around the same time are setting unrealistic expectations for the rest of us - we can't all be as lucky as Bill and Hillary.

describingcolours

"well youve had it 6 years that's a good amount of time for that kind of thing to work"

"you should be grateful you got 3 years of use out of that thing, I'm lucky if mine last a year haha"

listen, in 1977 nasa launched the voyager spacecrafts to take advantage of a planetary alignment that takes place every 175 years. These 2 crafts were planned to flyby the outer planets of our solar system and gather data on them to send back to us. Voyager 2 launched first on the 20th of August despite its name because it was planned to reach our gas giants after its counterpart voyager 1, which launched a little later on the 5th of September.

The voyager mission was planned to end 12 years later in 1989. In that time, voyager 1 and 2 passed by Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, and Neptune. They discovered new moons, confirmed theories about Saturn's rings, found the first active volcanoes found outside the earth, and they take close-up images of planets only seen at that point from telescopes.

On the 25th of August 1989, voyager 2 encounters Neptune, the last planet in our solar system the voyagers will meet. And that was that. End of mission. Now obsolete.

Less than 1 year later on valentine's day in 1990 voyager 1 looked back on the planet that had built it and sent with it a world's worth of hopes and dreams and took a picture. We called it the solar system family portrait and in it, we see ourselves. The pale blue dot nestled in the darkness of space

And then commands were sent to shut down their cameras. Preserve fuel.

35 years after launch, in 2012 voyager 1 sent back to us data about interstellar space. The very first manmade object to enter it.

41 years after launch voyager 2 did the same. Still operational, still going. Still sending back to us invaluable data, teaching us about our own solar system and the suns influence in our local bubble of space.

They are expected to continue to operate until the year 2025 - almost 50 whole years after they were launched and 36 years after their mission was supposed to have ended.

48 years of harsh space travel, battered by solar winds, pulled by gravity but fast enough just to escape, pelted by who knows how much space dust and radiation.

And even after that, they still have a purpose. Each craft was given a golden record. A disc filled with human knowledge and knowledge of humans and the planet they live on. Greetings and well-wishes to any prospective extraterrestrial life that could potentially pick it up. Co-ordinates, an invite. Samples of our music, the things we love, sounds of the earth, a story of our world. The surf, the wind, birds and whales, images of a mother, our moon, a sunset. Long after the voyager spacecrafts go dark, probably long after we are gone, they will still be doing their job; educating a species about our very tiny corner of the galaxy.

They are nasa's longest-running operation.

And it was all done using 70s technology.

So excuse me if I want a phone that lasts more than 2 years or a vacuum cleaner that doesn't break down after 6, or god fucking forbid, a refrigerator that will keep my food cold my entire fucking lifetime.