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The evolution of the "She Loves You" story of Paul helping John and Yoko get back together

As anyone who's talked to me about the Beatles knows, I am unhealthily obsessed with the discrepancies and timeline inconsistencies in the story about Paul "bringing a message" to John from Yoko in 1974, which supposedly contributed to them getting back together. To put this obsession to rest (as if, lol) I have put together two timelines: one of how the story has been recounted by Paul and Yoko over the years, and another outlining when exactly Yoko was in England in 1974, and where everyone else was during this period. I'm sharing the timelines in infographics first, then written descriptions with all the relevant quotes and sources. Also some commentary from me at the end. Hideously long post, apologies! You can just look at the infographics at the start to get the jist if you want to skip the text that comes after:)

Timeline 1: Publication history of the story 1981-2025

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Timeline 2: Where everyone was during late 1973-1974

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Part 1 Deep Dive: The evolution of the story.

The story is first mentioned by Paul to Hunter Davies in a private phone call in May 1981, but the account is not published by Davies until 1985. Paul describes it as him and Linda going out to LA and both of them telling him to go back to Yoko. There's no mention of a visit from Yoko first.

“Nobody knows how much I helped John. Me and Linda went to California and talked him out of his so-called lost weekend, when he was full of drugs. We told him to go back to Yoko and not long after he did. I went all the way to LA to see the bastard. He never gave me an inch, but he took so many yards and feet.

Source: The Beatles by Hunter Davies, afterword for 1985 edition.

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The first official interview mentioning it is with Chris Salewicz of Q Magazine in Oct 1986. The elements that will persist are there: Yoko visits Paul and Linda in Cavendish; tells them John has to "work his way back"; Paul and Linda then visit John in the LA house and Paul tells him this privately in a “back room.” (Linda no longer part of the message-relaying delegation). Also, Paul lays out specific conditions for John's "wooing" of Yoko, including taking a separate flat, sending her flowers etc, implying that these methods were his (Paul's) idea, and they worked, but John didn't acknowledge that afterwards.

Yoko came through London and visited us [...] we started talking, and obviously the important subject for us is: ‘What’s happened? You’ve broken up then? I mean, you’re here and he’s there.’ [...] She said, ‘No, he’s got to work his way back.’ I said, ‘Well look, do you still love him?’, and she said, ‘Yes.’ So I said, ‘Well, would you think it was an intrusion if I said to him, “Look, man, she loves you and there’s a way to get back”— sounds like a Beatles’ song — and I said ‘Would that be OK?’ She said she didn’t mind and we went out to visit him in L.A. in that house where all the crazy things went on and I took him into the back room and said, ‘This girl of yours, she really still loves you. Do you love her?’ And he said he did but he didn’t know what to do. So I said, ‘You’re going to have to work your little ass off, man. You have to get back to New York, you have to take a separate flat, you have to send her roses every fucking day, you have to work at it like a bitch! Then you just might get her back.’ And he did. I mean, if you hear it from John’s point of view, it’ll just be that he spoke to Yoko on the phone and she said to him, ‘Come back.’

Source: "Paul McCartney: An Innocent Man?" Interview for Q Magazine by Chris Salewicz, October 1986.

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No further mention (that I could find) until 1997 and Many Years from Now, Paul's quasi-autobiography with Barry Miles. The basic elements are there, with some additions and changes. The methods of 'wooing' - flowers, living separately - are now Yoko's idea rather than Paul's. Also, we get the first instance of "Harry Nilsson offering Paul angel dust" story. It's also the first mention of May. Same “back room” and private conversation.

When they split up, Yoko came to London, looking like a widow, a little diminutive sad figure in black. She came around to Cavendish, and she said, 'John's left, he's off with May Pang.' So, being friendly and seeing her plight, Linda or I said to her, 'Do you still love him? Do you want to get back with him?' She said, 'Yes.' We said, 'Well, what would it take then?' because we were going out L. A. way [...] I said, 'I can take a message. What would I have to tell him?' And she gave me this whole thing: 'He would have to come back to New York. He can't live with me immediately. He'd have to court me, he'd have to ask me out. He'd have to send me flowers, he'll have to do it all again.' Of course, she'd sent him off with May Pang, but that wasn't the point at that time. So I went out there and he was doing Pussy Cats with Nilsson and Keith Moon and Jesse Ed Davis, to name but three total nutters. Three beautiful total alcohol nutters plus John, forget it! Even the location is perfect. We went round to a session and sat there for a bit. It was a little bit strange, John and I, seeing each other at that time. But then we dropped by their house the next day for a cup of tea or something. I remember Harry Nilsson offering me some angel dust. I said, 'What is it?' He said, 'It's elephant tranquilliser.' I said, 'Is it fun?' He thought for about half a minute. 'No,' he said. I said, 'Well, you know what, I won't have any.' He seemed to understand. But that's how it was there. [...] So I was having fun with the guys sitting round the pool, and eventually John got up [...] I took John in the back room of the house, sat down - 'How you doing? Great. Lovely to see you ...' [...] I said, Yoko was through London and she said she wouldn't mind getting back together. How about you? Would you be interested in that?' He said, 'Yeah.' That he still loved her and stuff. So I said, 'Here's the deal. You've got to go back to New York. You've got to go get a flat, court her, so-and-so ...' and that's just what he did. That's how they got back together again.

Source: Many Years From Now by Barry Miles, 1997.

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On a BBC TV show in 1998, Yoko responds to MYFN in general and that story in particular (also the context of the infamous Mozart-Salieri comment). Note that she doesn't seem to be denying that the message-relaying happened, she's more making the point that it had no impact on John and her reuniting, and is annoyed that Paul is "taking credit" for it, in her view:

Let him [Paul] say whatever he wants to say. I feel that he has to say all of those things. But if he wants to get credit about it, why not? That's fine. I know it wasn't true. I know that he didn't come back because Paul said a few words or something like that. He's put in a position of being Salieri to Mozart. And it's sad.

Source: O Zone Special: The Ballad of Yoko and John, BBC 2, 6 January 1998, reported in The Beatles Diary Volume 2: After the Break-Up 1970–2001 by Keith Badman, published 2001

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No further comment (that I could find) from either till 2010, when Yoko confirms the story in an interview with BBC Radio, but with different details - this time it's Paul and Linda visiting her in the Dakota in early 1974. In this version, the "courting" is Yoko's idea, Paul merely relays the message.

Paul and Linda visited me earlier in the year in New York, and Paul told me he was going to see John in LA. He asked what it would take for me to go back to John, and I said, ‘Well, maybe if he courted me. [...] the whole building [the Dakota] was in a kind of flurry because it was Paul coming, it was the first time he had visited. And we had a talk in the kitchen, which went on so long it started getting dark. I had a strange kind of fridge, one that had a glass door so you could see inside, the kind you see in a professional kitchen, and that was the only light by then. Paul said they were going to go to LA, and just when they were leaving, the door was open already, and he just did a kind of double- take, and came back and said, ‘By the way, what will make you come back to John?’ John told me later he’d said, ‘You want to know how to get Yoko back?’ Obviously that’s not just how we came back, because we are two individuals who had our own feelings, and it wasn’t like, ‘Oh, if Paul says . . .’ But the fact that John immediately tried to court me, and came back to New York, had some meaning.”

Source: "Can’t buy me love: Yoko tells how Paul saved her marriage to John", The Times UK, 9 October 2010.

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In Joe Hagan’s 2015 interview, Paul tells the story again, with some changes - this time they’re in Sussex, not Cavendish, and Yoko is specifically asking Paul to do this as a favour to her, one reason being she is worried about John in LA. The same beats occur: Paul goes to LA, Nilsson angel dust, back room, the message, the "courting" methods.

Well, the story behind that was that Yoko came to see Linda and me at our farmhouse [...] She sat at our kitchen table and said, “I’d like you to do me a favor. I’d like you to be the go-between for me and John. John’s out in LA going crazy, and I will have him back. And I want you to tell him—I’m not going to tell him. Could you send a message? Tell him I’ve come to see you. Give him this message: ‘Yoko will have you back on certain conditions.’” [...] So I went out there. John wasn’t up yet, so I sat in the garden. Keith [Moon] came out. Harry Nilsson came out. Jesse Ed Davis came out. They said, “John’s just getting up.” Harry Nilsson, opposite me on this table in the sunshine, says, “Do you want the angel dust?” I said, “I don’t know. What is it?” He said, “Well, it’s an elephant tranquilizer.” I said, “Is it fun?” And he goes, “No.” I said, “Okay, I won’t do it. Thanks for the offer.” That’s how logical it was [...] Shortly after, John came out—very lovely and very friendly. I said, “I’ve got a message for you from Yoko.” He said, “Okay.” So we went into a back room, and I said, “Okay. She came to our home in England and said, ‘Could [you] be the go-between?’ She said she is willing to have you back if you want to go back. She’s willing to take you back, but you’ve got to go to New York. You’ve got to get your own place. You’ve got to court her. You’ve got to send flowers. You’ve got to do it all right. And then she’ll take you back.”

Source: ‘Paul McCartney Unfiltered’ Part 1 | Part 2. Vanity Fair, 28 February 2026 (interview done in 2015)

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The story described more or less the same in Philip Norman’s 2016 Paul bio, but it also notes that when Yoko supposedly visited Paul, his visa situation for entering the USA was still unsure, and says the visit from Yoko took place "the year before" the LA visit, which places it in 1973 (!)

The idea was that Yoko should be as sexually liberated as John. Instead, she returned to London and, surprisingly, turned up at Paul's door, as he later recalled: "a little diminutive, sad figure in black'. She had never confided in him before, still less in Linda, but now told them she already missed John and wanted a reconciliation. Paul, by rights, should have felt little concern for the relationship which had started the Beatles on the downward slope. Still, he offered to play Cupid and deliver a message from Yoko the next time he saw John, although with his present visa situation there was no telling when that might be. Yoko then set out the conditions John had to observe if they were to start over: 'He would have to come back to New York. He can't live with me immediately. He'd have to court me, he'd have to ask me out again. He'd have to send me flowers.' [...] [On] 31 March [1974], Paul and Linda were invited to the beach house in Santa Monica [...] While the visitors waited, they were offered something called elephant tranquilliser' by Nilsson [...] When John finally surfaced he seemed to be 'in a mellow mood', so at a suitable moment Paul took him to one side and relayed Yoko's message from the year before, which was essentially 'She loves you'.

Source: Paul McCartney: The Life by Philip Norman, 2016.

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The story is described in much the same way in The McCartney Legacy Vol. 2, 2024, mostly using the Q interview and MYFN as sources. Yoko is described as visiting Paul and Linda just before they travelled to LA, but there isn't a separate source for that. Paul and Linda are also described as travelling back to NYC on 1 April, straight after the meeting with John, even though they were due back in LA again on 2 April for the Oscars. It's speculated that they may have visited Yoko to debrief.

The McCartneys also had an unexpected visitor in late March. Yoko Ono turned up shortly before they left for America [...] Strangely, given Linda’s lifelong fear of flying, and the fact that they still intended to go to the Academy Awards ceremony on April 2, the McCartneys flew back to New York immediately after the visit. It is possible that Paul visited Yoko at the Dakota to brief her on his meeting with John, or that he had business with the Eastmans.

Source: The McCartney Legacy Vol. 2: 1974-80 by Allan Kozinn and Adrian Sinclair, 2024.

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In Elliot Mintz’s memoir (2024), Paul brings the message to LA, and “spoke” to Yoko beforehand, offering to talk to John on her behalf. Also, in this version Yoko speaks to Mintz in advance of Paul's visit and seems to know that it's happening. Yoko said OK but as long as it was clear that it was Paul’s idea, and she definitely hadn’t asked him to do it. In this version the "courting" methods seem to be Paul's idea.

What John didn't know about that surprise encounter [the March 1974 LA studio drop-in], though, was that, according to Yoko, Paul had an ulterior motive for the visit. A few days earlier, she had called me to explain the machinations behind the visit. Yoko told me she spoke with Paul, who offered to speak with John. "That's very generous," I responded. "How did you react to his offer?" "I thought it was very kind," she said. "I was very appreciative. But I made it very clear to Paul that it wasn't something I was asking him to do. It would have to be Paul's idea, not mine, something Paul was doing on his own." [...] Sometime after popping into the studio in Burbank, [Paul] sat down with John and laid out, step by step, what he would need to do to win Yoko back. He told John he'd have to court her the way he had when they first met, to ask her on dates and bring her flowers and gifts. He'd need to clean up his act and demonstrate to Yoko that he was a complete man, whole again, capable of rebuilding their marriage. In short, he'd need to convince Yoko he was worth taking back. It's impossible to say if Paul's presentation was what did it, or if John experienced some other epiphany around that time, but over the ensuing months he did indeed begin to clean up his act.

Source: We All Shine On: John, Yoko and Me by Elliot Mintz, 2024.

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The story is described briefly in David Sheff's Yoko bio (2025) as Paul "pleading with Yoko on John's behalf", no dates given.

Even as Yoko was thriving alone alone, she heard from John, who, though living with May, continued to beg to come home. She also heard from mutual friends, including Paul McCartney, who pleaded with Yoko on his behalf. But in addition to feeling that John wasn't ready to come home, Yoko hadn't yet answered her own questions about the relationship.

Yoko: A Biography by David Sheff, 2025.

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Story is described by Paul in the Wings book (2025) in roughly the same terms as before - again, its Yoko asking Paul to be the "go-between" rather than him offering first, and he goes to LA, back room, "courting" methods etc. May is mentioned and it's implied that Yoko had "set up" something in NY with May and John, but they'd gone rogue by going to LA (Only implied though). Dates are different - Paul visits on 1 April rather than 31 March (It's possible he visited on both days, although as noted above, the McCartney Legacy has a record of them travelling to NY for one day on 1 April.)

On 28 March, Paul came over to see John, and they played together in a shambolic jam session, joined by too many people, which was later bootlegged. Four days later, on 1 April, Paul came back to the house to speak to John. Ringo was there, along with Harry Nilsson, who offered Paul a hit of elephant tranquillizer (wisely, he declined). When Paul finally could speak to John in private, he transmitted Yoko's message.

PAUL McCARTNEY: This was two old friends, reunited. But the back story to all of this is that Yoko had come to visit us in London while John was out in LA, drinking and having a crazy time [...] We're talking, and of course the subject of John came up, and we asked, 'What's happened? You're here, he's there - you've broken up?' Yoko confided in us that she'd set up this agreement with May Pang and - long story short - John had left Yoko for May Pang and they were now living over in Santa Monica. Yoko was being strong about it, and I asked, 'Are you still in love with him?' She said, 'Yes. But he's got to work his way back to me. He's got to work at it' She asked if I'd be the go-between, so I said, 'If I see him, should I tell him, "Look, John, Yoko loves you. There's a way to get her back." Would that be OK?' And she said, 'I don't mind.' [...] I said to John, 'Look, come here. Let's go talk some-where, get some privacy.' So we went out to this room in the back of the house, and I sat him down and said, 'I feel like a matchmaker here, but Yoko still loves you. Do you still love her?' And his guard came down and said, 'Yes. But I don't know what to do' So I said, 'Well, Yoko came to see us in London. So, we've talked to her and she does still love you, but you're going to have to work your arse off to win her back' It's a little funny thinking about it now, because it really was like the two young lads who wrote 'She Loves You' all those years earlier were now living out the lyrics line by line. I said, 'You have to get back to New York. Get yourself a separate flat and send her roses every fucking day. And if you work hard enough, you might just get her back. John did just that, and not long after, Sean was born.

Source: Wings: The Story of a Band on the Run by Paul McCartney and Ted Widmer, 2025

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Part 2 Deep Dive: Yoko's locations and travels in 1974

Yoko's concert tour of Japan took place in August 1974 - confirmed in Lennonology and the Sheff bio. Exact dates are given in Lennonology: 10 - 19 August.

Yoko travelling back to the US via London is confirmed in Lennonology, May Pang's book and the Sheff bio. The Sheff bio has her visiting Paul and Linda, and George (!); Lennonology has her visiting them plus meeting with Mimi. May’s book only mentions her meeting with Mimi. But all agree it was after her Japanese tour, so it can’t have been before late August at the earliest. Lennonology places the visits around 20 August.

There's no record of Yoko travelling to England (or anywhere outside the USA) between John leaving for LA in September 1973 and her going to Japan in August 1974. Her ability to travel outside the USA was restricted anyway before c.May 1972, when one of John and Yoko's endless deportation hearings found that she had in fact been granted legal alien status back in 1964 (it's not clear if that finding immediately led to her being able to leave the country if she wanted, but by 1974 it's clear she could).

Sources for above: Lennonology: A Scrapbook of Madness Volume 1 by Chip Madinger and Scott Raile, 2015; Yoko: A Biography by David Sheff, 2025 and Loving John: The Untold Story May Pang and Henry Edwards, 1983.

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Part 3 Deep Dive: The discrepancies!!

The core of the issue, for me, is that, early on, Paul maintained he brought the "message" to John in LA while he (John) was living with Harry Nilsson, May et.al. in the house in Santa Monica. There's ample evidence of Paul and Linda visiting said house on 31 March 1974 (and possibly 1 April too) so the visit isn't in doubt. The spanner in the works is that, since 1986, Paul has also insisted that the visit was preceded by a visit from Yoko to him and Linda in England, asking for his help in effecting a reconciliation. Except there is no record of Yoko visiting England (or anywhere outside the USA) from the period of John moving to LA in September 1973 to end of March 1974. What there is a record of is a visit by Yoko to England on her way back from her tour in Japan in late August 1974. Multiple sources record her seeing Paul and Linda, George, and Mimi while she was there.

John is recorded as having left LA and moved back to NY with May in July 1974. Even if he did go back and forth to LA sometimes, he didn't live in that Santa Monica party house again. So the timeline of Yoko visiting Paul -> Paul delivering message to John in LA is simply not possible with the information we currently have. Yoko, for her part, spoke once about a meeting followed by a message-delivery, but places the meeting as Paul and Linda visiting her in the Dakota on their way to LA in March 1974. Yoko's version actually makes the most sense with the information we have.

Other options include:

Yoko phoned Paul before March 1974 rather than visiting him, and Paul conflated this with the England visit in August.

Paul actually delivered the message in NYC or another location in LA (John was briefly in California in September 1974 to do promotion for Walls and Bridges; Paul was in NYC in December 1974 for the ill-fated Beatles dissolution meeting, and he and Linda are recorded as visiting John and May in January 1975 on their way to New Orleans. They also visited in July 1974 but that's too early for the timeline as it exists).

Yoko made a secret, very short trip to London in late 1973 or early 1974.

None of this happened as described and there is a more convoluted real story underneath the narrative (what, I have no idea).

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