Barista Blues

Your local barista is sick of your shit. (A place to vent about mostly barista/coffee shop work but general customer and food service too!)

[barista-blues]

Introduction and General Explanation

Who runs this blog?

My name is Alex, and I’ve been a barista for 3 (almost 4) years now and I’ve worked in general customer service for a bit longer. I’ve made the coffees, taken the orders, cashed people out, made sandwiches, everything in your average coffee place, I’ve done.

What’s this blog for?

To vent, honestly. There’s a lot of bullshit in the service industry in general, but there’s a special kind when it comes to coffee places. This is for me to vent and give advice on how to function better as both a barista or customer.

Why?

Because it helps me to write this stuff down, and who knows? Maybe it’ll help other people too.

[barista-blues]

NEVER work for Starbucks.

This is objectively the worst job I’ve ever had.

I had placed a notice of resignation, but I’m done.

I quit today.

[robertreich]

Starbucks Workers United baristas are escalating their fight for a fair contract. I urge you to keep boycotting Starbucks — and delete its app from your phone. Workers are fed up with low pay, chaotic scheduling, understaffing, and illegal union busting. Let's keep fighting corporate greed.

[barista-blues]

You’re a loser if you’re so desperate for shitty, overpriced drinks, you’ll happily sit in a line out to the road and push the baristas just a little closer to taking the leap.

[barista-blues]

Starbucks sucks and everyone should stop going there.

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At the my coffee establishment, if you order certain frozen coffees/fraps, but change one of the integral ingredients, I have to type it out in a way that charges you for all the special toppings.

That’s the correct way we’re supposed to do it because our corporation is cheap as hell. There’s a famous one where we’ve had to explain to people that while it’s not on the menu, we can still make it but it’ll cost more due to being typed in manually.

Some people either don’t know or they’re being nice when they type it the cheaper way, and that’s the only reason that happens.

I just had a guy with his girlfriend throw a little fit at me about this fact, because the other stores don’t do this! I could barely pay attention to his bullshit because on the window of his car was a VoreDash sticker.

Brother, you cannot be driving around with that and getting annoyed at a barista just doing their job.

[barista-blues]

“I don’t know what you want me to do about it.”

- a customer today after she knowingly drove up without enough money and her purse unreachable in the backseat.

The system wouldn’t let me save it because it was partially paid, and wouldn’t let me cancel if after trying to back out of that 🙃

Bitch, what do you want ME to do about this???? Your bitchass shouldn’t have joined the long as fuck drive thru line WHEN YOU KNEW YOU COULDN’T PAY FOR YOUR SHIT.

[barista-blues]

A customer tipped us 50 cents on her card today. She really selected custom and typed out 50 cents.

Reminder that y’all don’t have to tip baristas, it’s totally fine, we’re at least making minimum wage. But if it’s that low? Just don’t tip, you just wasting time at that point, and you might need those fifty cents more than me.

[barista-blues]

There’s a special place in hell for the coworkers who do nothing but watch you struggle to clean up after the shit they didn’t do in the HOURS they had to do it, make a bigger mess of several places, and have the nuts to be a corporate shill in the case of one of them.

[barista-blues]

I forgot that Starbucks customers are a straight up cult for those overpriced cups.

Like y’all, it’s weird to camp outside a Starbucks at 3 AM to ask for a cup and then get mad you chose a store that doesn’t sell them to begin with.

When I left work around 10 AM yesterday, we’d gotten over 50 people who had called or driven up to ask if we had it.

I cannot stress enough that it’s a cup. It’s not worth it. You can definitely find one just like it online. Do not buy a scalped one either. It’s just a cup.

[barista-blues]

I quit my barista job after 3 years and by god it feels so GOOD.

[barista-blues]

I’m a barista again :(

[barista-blues]

Customer Tip: Free For All Menu

Y’all, do not pull up to a coffee shop of any kinda and try to order something that isn’t on the menu.

Too many people see a trendy Internet drink that was named by people online and somehow think that baristas know what it is and how to make it.

If it’s not on the menu, it doesn’t exist.

If they have the ingredients to make it, you need to order it by stating what the parts of the drink are!

[fuck-customers]

This is more of a “fuck anyone who does this”. Idk about anyone else but nothing is more disrespectful and unprofessional to me than being called a pet name by a customer or coworker/manager. I’m not your “hon”, I’m not your “sweetie”, I’m not “sweetheart”. I’m a 30 something year old employee and we’re currently making a business transaction. Act accordingly. It’s not cute and it makes me want to go feral every single time a stranger does it, especially when they’re around the same age as me or younger. And before anyone says it, I truly don’t give a flying fuck that it’s a “southern thing” in some places. It’s a power play and it’s condescending as shit. Stop doing it.

Posted by admin Rodney.

[barista-blues]

Customer Tip: Pointing at the Menu

Don’t. Just don’t.

Even more so if you’re in the drive thru.

It’s so important to use your words when you’re ordering. Be clear and specific when you order! Nothing is less clear and specific than pointing vaguely at a menu that’s almost always above the person taking your order.

Remember that they’re not required to memorize what that menu looks like. Even if they did, there is no way to guess what part of the menu that you’re specifically pointing at!

And once again, same for the drive thru! No one memorized what the menu outside the building looks like, most if not all of the employees don’t even know what the drive thru menu looks like on the average day because they don’t interact with it.

Saying “I want that” or “I want the one that’s $3” doesn’t help anyone. Pretty please use your words like and adult so that the interaction can go as fast and smoothly as possible and no one has to play a guessing game in order to get you a coffee.

[fuck-customers]

If you go into a store and ask a random ass employee if [employee name] is here today, any employee worth half a shit will lie to you. We do not know if you're a family member/friend (but we can assume you're not, since you would simply contact said employee directly) or a customer who has a meeting with the employee or someone dangerous: a stalker, abusive ex, etc. Stop asking for personal information from retail employees. If you see the employee in the store, they're there. If not, they're not. Simple as that.

Posted by admin Rodney.

[fuck-customers]

[barista-blues]

I quit my barista job after 3 years and by god it feels so GOOD.