grout white shark
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izzy's playlists!
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Cosmic Funnies
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trying on a metaphor

Love Begins
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@basically
grout white shark
team 7 watching kakashi interacting with a human woman:
they’re the fucking worst god damn imagine being kakashi and trying to have a sex life. imagine buying condoms at 2am and you’re paying at the register and look out the window and there are these 3 tiny ninja faces pressed against the glass wearing the shocked pikachu expression as the store owner slaps the condoms into your palm
Hahaha this post is so hilarious, I LOVE IT
going on a guilt trip do yall want anything
if you really cared about me you wouldn't have to ask
people aren't even exaggerating indeed is literally like that. walmart attendant $13 an hour, target attendant $13 an hour, AI dick sucker $40 an hour, home depot attendant $13 an hour, guy who designs bullets that can only kill children $160k a year plus benefits, gas station manager $18 an hour
>it’s wet
@canadiangold
"But won't children be confused by all the LGBT-"
Yesterday I saw a mother with a baby carriage, being followed by a girl of about 4-6 years old on a bicycle. The kid started ringing her bike bell like RING RING RING RING RING RING RING, and the mother turned to look behind them to see whether they were being followed by a cyclist who desperately needs to pass them for the sake of everyone's safety.
And the little girl - who just rang the goddamn bell herself 5 seconds ago - also turned to look.
Kids are confused by everything at all times. They don't know jack shit. About anything.
i remember being like 8 or 9 and being told that my dad’s ex-wife was no longer diane and we were to address her as daniel now. my reaction: “ok.”
me and my brother later had a small discussion about whether that could happen randomly (conclusion: no, he probably had to file papers or something) and whether daniel should now be referred to as dad’s ex-husband (conclusion: yes but only to see the face he’ll make) but at no point did we find it like... alarming? the world is big and weird. we were used to it.
finding out a sorta-relative could just change genders off camera, as it were, was a whole lot less head-splodey than finding out there were no squirrels in australia!
There’s no what
hi guys
bye guys
throwing a grenade and then immediately throwing myself on top of it to save everyone
i completely miss the grenade and everyone in the room dies including me
American politics
My favorite joke in Metalocalypse is how as the show goes on it becomes increasingly obvious they’re naming characters with the sole purpose of torturing Mark Hamill.
It’s been almost two years since I posted this but here’s a list of the official spelling of every character he introduces here:
Dr. Gibbitz
Dr. Amon Skagerakk Fredrickshaven
Dr. Donald Gorthian
Ronald Von Momnaldberg
Dr. Natasha Nesciantskidovich
Vicenzo de Alimamala Corningston III
Professor Jerry Gustav Mangledink
Horace Marmingblat Wimplestein, Jr.
Dr. Chazz Fazzledopenhoffer
Vater Oorlag
Dr. Milminaman-lanilim-swinwamly
Dr. Gibbitz again (but for some reason it’s spelled “Gibbetz” in the season 2 subtitles)
Melmord Fjordslorn
Dr. Ralphus Galkinsmelter
Dr. Amomolith Chesterfield
Wilmore Unduntingiminen
Dr. Ninmiltrid Fmiltindryden
Dr. Imptnin Pmiltson
Dr. Tormindbind Mickmildididindnin
Dr. Krumpworth Chponglasia IV, Jr.
Dr. Borgermu Barret Swingdworth
Dr. Richard Reinhold Rnawighiwowpj
Captain Slufgyflaysid
Dr. Bartholomew Grahsrihajul
Dr. Alsajahb Fifborgiltk
Dr. Fsmilejera Irlelwoll
Dr. Commander Vernmim Chuntspinkton
Like I just love how you can pinpoint “Ninmiltrid Fmiltindryden” as the exact moment the joke went from making Mark Hamill say funny but still vaguely name-shaped words to forcing that poor man to pronounce straight up keysmashes out loud.
The feared sting-ray
The elusive and mysterious StingRug
SNUG RAY
literally every time I see this on my dash it fills me with Lovecraftian, cosmic dread