Thoughts and Shit

Name's Brennan I update here about my transition and life milestones. "Change is slow always has been always will be...." -J. Cole

[basically-bt]

Hey guys!! Exciting news! I just got top surgery. Everything went fine and I cant for the results. I hopefully get my tubes out next tuesday. The pic is before surgery.

UPDATE!

I am doing fan-fucking-tastic!!! I am 2 weeks post op. I want to post some pics. I am afraid I will get flagged but o well. My body confidence has risen even with the scars and scabs (for now). I am still healing of course. Started planning a workout routine with a fitness instructor student at my school, they are doing researching on a transgender fitness "program" to help trans individuals lessen their dysphoria. I making a video on that weight loss & muscle gain later with more updates. If you have any questions feel free to dm or comment.

[basically-bt]

Update

Hey everyone!

I am back after a long unexpected unplanned hiatus lol I want to give more of an online presence and support to the community. I have been on testosterone for about 6 months now and been recording my journey. I am more then happy to edit and share those videos. So, while I create some videos on topics that are apart of my journey, if you have any questions about me or my transition just ask away.

[basically-bt]

3 Month Update

So I officially got 3 months last week and things are going great. I have noticed alot of small changes that will lead to bigger things.

My voice is changing constantly. I really have to practice my voice training exercises and watch how I speak.

Hair has increased on my legs, stomach and slightly on my face. I going to start shaving my face heard it helps alot.

My appetite, I think have ready changed alot. I can eat like a beast but still be hungry. Eating how i use to isnt going to cut it anymore.

Far redistributed slightly it hangs more on my stomach rather then my sides. My legs are shaping out nice too. Makes me want to start going to the gym again.

My next check in I want to talk about increasing my dosage and top surgery.

I want to increase my dosage, because in a weird way I dont think it's enough. I understand changes eont happen faster, etc but idk cant explain the feeling.

For top surgery I want to get a move on making appointments and preparing whoever is going to take care of me. My insurance covers it after I am on T for a year but still wait lists are long especially for a good surgeon. Plus, I am honestly alittle scared.

[basically-bt]

Name Update

Hey yall good news and bad news!!

Good news: I have a name now!

Bad news: My mother doesn't want to talk with me.

Okay, so long story short on how these correlate is I wanted my mom to pick my new name, but she didn't see the sense in changing my name. Thought it was fine. Which hurt alot, because she did even want to talk about my choice or what my grandfather's name was so I can change my middle name. Still from that I spoke to my grandmother (her mother and the person I was most worried about) and she was actually kind and understanding. She loves my name.

Either way I making a whole video on my name and picking a name in general, because this was really important to me and was alot.

My name is...

Brennan Terry...

Nice to meet y'all.

[dysphoriathoughts]

No equipment ftm workout

okay i’ve been getting quite a few asks about this so i thought i’d just make a post about it. i’ll split it into three categories based on experience - easy, medium, and hard. let me know if y’all are interested in a bodybuilding split workout then i’ll post one of those too.

easy - if you’re new to working out or strength training

knee pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

sit ups - 3 sets of 10 reps

mountain climbers - 2 sets of 20 reps

lunges - 3 sets of 10 reps (5 per leg)

alternating arm/leg raises - 4 sets of 10 reps

jumping jacks - 4 sets of 10 reps

medium - a slightly more challenging if you feel like the above one is too easy

pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

sit ups - 3 sets of 15 reps

squats - 3 sets of 10 reps (make sure to go down below parallel)

pike push-ups - 3 sets of 10 reps

plank - 2 sets of 60 second hold

doorway rows - 4 sets of 10 reps (link coz its a little unknown)

burpees - 5 sets of 10 reps

hard - if you’ve been working out before and want something a little challenging

pushups - 5 sets of 10 reps

diamond pushup - 2 sets of 6 reps

squats - 5 sets of 10 reps

pullups - 2 sets of 10 reps

reverse crunches - 3 sets of 10 reps

wall sit - 3 sets of 60 second hold

burpees - 8 sets of 10 reps

[warmbrightedits]

Stills from A Year In Transition, which follows a transgender man throughout one year of his life, including hormone replacement therapy and top surgery.

The documentary was filmed by a gay trans man named Lorne Clarkson, stars Issa Ismail as the protagonist, and features numerous other trans men discussing their experiences with transitioning. I’ve never before seen a documentary that so closely follows the struggles, complications, and nuances of FTM experiences.

[mydysphoriaventblog]

me, in public: *doesn’t pass*

me:

[vndrew-txt-deactivated20200527]

The worst😑

[basically-bt]

Voice

So I know that its early but my voice is already changing. When I got the first shot a couple days after that I got like a sore throat for like 2 days. My voice start cracking and breaking. Then I had my second shot and for the last 2 days my throat has been sore again. My voice getting deeper. But, I thought I was just imagining this you know it's early, the range is usually in 3 months.

But, this morning I said, "hi" to my roommate and she was like "oh wow your voice is getting deeper already". I was like "cool dude thanks". The thing I hated the most was my voice. Because, how I sound in my head is not how I actually sound. Plus on top of that I generally pass, but as soon as I say something that's when I get misgenered.

I am so excited. I am glad this happened so fast. Will post the 1st voice comparison on the 12 for my month.

[legbet]

some #relatable trans guy things

putting pressure against ur chest when u arent binding bc its comforting

the Thing™ with ur shirt where u pull it away from ur chest and shake it a bunch

doing that like every two seconds when ur dysphoria is particularly bad

[waiter/waitress comes by] [voice drops an octave] “yeah i’d like the…”

baby face

every male adult stranger calling u “bud” bc they think ur a prepubescent boy

insecurities manifesting in unconventional places (lack of body hair or feet size for example)

“be honest with me…. do i look flat in this shirt?”

pre-op, owning exactly 1 (one) bra bc ur only ever wearing a binder or nothing otherwise

getting unnecessarily excited to buy super boring stuff (cologne, mens underwear, etc)

feeling like a stereotypical 13 y/o boy when, post-starting t, u get ur First Facial Hair 

the moment of intense fear when u hear someone say “ma’am” or “she” and the immense amount of relief when u realize theyre talking to someone else

getting mistaken for ur cis friends baby brother bc u look so much younger than them

other trans dudes, feel free to add stuff!

[basically-bt]

I got my first T shot yesterday!!

This happy mf

[basically-bt]

Life Update

I had an appointment a the other day for my blood test. If everything goes great I can start T within the week.

I real close to choosing a name I have 3 options left. 🤦🏽‍♂️ I am just so indecisive.

I still go to group therapy instead of individual. Trying to get more support and friends in the community.

I cut back on my "substance" I take trying to sober up alittle

I am still at the gym not as regularly as I want but hopefully with T to "inspire"me I will go more frequently

I dont know what kind of relationship I have with my parents right now....I hope it will get better, but idk

I get to graduate at the end of this year. Earlier then i thought tbh and I have a good support team right now helping figure out what direction I want to take my degree.

Lastly, the girl I like really fucked me up....we are still really good friends but man if I hadn't fucked up...... (I could write a whole post about it tbh)

Overall I am in a really good place right now. I, honestly am I am going through alot and it's all very reassuring to be this happy and okay with all the changes. Makes me feel like I am finally doing something right.

I might move these updates all to a vlog format too.

[zanestransition]

Summer swimming tip for trans guys and Non binary folks!

I almost didnt go swimming or to the beach all summer because of how anxious and uncomfortable just thinking about being in a wet t shirt and sports bra would make me.

But this company saved me. They’re called Outplay and seem to be mainly advertised towards females but not to the point where navigating the website is unbearable. The flatsea compression shirt is the most comfortable binder I’ve ever worn. Its thicker than a bathing suit but doesnt make you overheat and you dont stay wet longer than normal after getting out of the water either.

I got a size small and with high compression and couldnt be more happy with the results. Its comfortable enough to wear all day at the beach and is more comfortable to wear as a regular binder. My weight has also fluctuated while I’ve owned this binder and when my stomach was bigger the material didnt roll at all. It will run you about $65 (shipping included)for a great transitional binder and it seemed worth it to me.

[mothertimestwo]

There is also another company called Heroine Binders that have a complete swimming line that’s AWESOME

They are in fact having a giveaway now that you can check out here

[scream-me-to-sleep]

I hope it’s okay for cis people to reblog this in support. I just want to spread this for those who need it.

[romansleftshoulderpad]

@accidentally-logince !!!!!!! SWIM BINDERS!!!!!!!!!

[glumshoe]

I do strongly caution against wearing a binder of any kind while swimming - the combined pressure of the water and the binder around your ribs can make it very difficult to breathe and be extra taxing on your lungs and the sensitive musculature of your back. This is probably a lot better to swim in than a standard GC2B binder, but be careful and mindful of your lung capacity.

[journeyintomanhood]

Fashion Resources for Trans Men

I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to dress. I don’t mean to pass but to dress and look and fee good. The truth is I used to know nothing about fashion. I grew up wearing my brothers hand-me-downs because we were didn’t have money for much else, moved to wearing clothes I hated, and then moved into wearing clothes to pass (read oversized hoodies and jeans). So here is a list of things I’ve found helpful and you might too: 

General Fashion Tips:  

15 Quick Fashion Tips for Men

Men’s Fashion Basics - Formal

Men’s Fashion Basics - Casual 

Upgrade Your Style: 25 Easy Tips for Men 

How to Dress Sharp: 9 Style Steps for Young Men 

A Man’s Belt Guide 

28 Fashion Items Every Guy Needs for Spring and Summer Under $100 

The Ten Commandments of Summer Style 

10 Tips for Better Men’s Fall Outfits 

Dos and Don’ts of Winter Fashion

Tips for Dressing when You’re Short: 

Dressing Taller: 10 Tips for Short Men 

The Modest Man 

5 Dressing Tips for Short Men 

Fashion Tips for Short(er) Men

Tips to Look Older: 

14 Style Tips to Dress Older 

10 Easy Ways to Look Older as a Man 

How to Look Older: Ways Baby Faced Guys Can Look Older Than Their Age 

Haircut and Style Tips: 

How to Get a Better Haircut 

How to Find the Right Hairstyle for your Face 

Grooming Style Product Guide 

Shaving & Facial Hair Tips:  

12 Easy Beard Care Tips 

How to Get the Best Shave 

Shaving 101 

[basically-bt]

T-Update

I just spoke with my gender specialist and discussing what my goals are for.

I am lucky enough that if start my paper work now I can probably start T in the beginning of 2019. I excited, like I am literally counting down the days now. I am going to make a vlog (that will be person for now) to record everything or a picture a day type thing. 

Top surgery is covered by my insurance (is what I have been told) I have to be on T for a year, which is fine. Still within a year time things change, so i will make any surgery updates when things come up.

We also discussed me continuing individual therapy and joining group therapy as well. The additional support of other LGBT+ people would be just nice. It was nice for her to be supportive of also getting my mental health together.

GROWTH

[jasonthegr8]

[vampyrxmortis]

please,,,,,,,, tell me,,,,,,,,,, i’m not the only one who does this,,,,,,,,,

[transstudent]

@all our trans masc/enby afab friends