Fight Me IRL

you'll probably win

[spnyuri]

the past tense of blink should be blunk discuss

[katesofheaven]

no

think➡️thought

blink➡️blought

[spnyuri]

holy fucking shit you’re on a galaxy brain level of thinking and i respect you

[memecage]

[ashleybuttons]

So I just had the shit creeped out of me.

I’m not someone who believes in ghosts, but I was sitting in my room, alone and in the dark, and I heard the strings of my violin being softly plucked. 

My violin is hanging on the wall several feet away. 

So I gathered my courage, grabbed my phone, and used the camera light to investigate. 

And found this.

A goddamn spider was playing my violin. Not even joking. The little shit.

[rae-rose]

I think I’d have preferred a ghost….

[cosplay-in-the-usa-deactivated2]

So anyway…. *tiny incoherent cough exhumes from spider* Here’s Wonderwall.

[enscenic]

bwa ha ha ha

[lily-ackerman]

[jenniferrpovey]

I hesitated before posting, but I bet I know what’s going on here. The plucking was pretty rhythmic, right?

Male spiders pluck the webs of female spiders in a pattern to determine if the female is interested.

That spider was trying to mate with your violin…

[helen007900]

Ahh so it’s a boy(I just assume every insect I see is a girl) that’s such a cute mating ritual!

He just wants love!

[jenniferrpovey]

The behavior would indicate that it is a male. Only females weave webs. Male spiders have to be careful not to be mistaken for prey and eaten, so they pluck the web. Poor thing didn’t exactly get any this time!

[the-rain-monster]

Poor spider thinking “Damn this web was made by a strong spider, a real awesome spider, can I possibly get with this boss ass spider??”

[jumpingjacktrash]

poor little hyperion, dreaming of the moon

[i-draws-dinosaurs]

I love and support him in his musical endeavours

[whitepeopletwitter]

[text-mode]

The Morris worm or Internet worm of November 2, 1988 was one of the first computer worms distributed via the Internet. It was written by a student at Cornell University, Robert Tappan Morris, and launched on November 2, 1988 from MIT.

[pyronoid-d-deactivated20181217]

It’s trapped on a floppy tho this is some dark shit it has been denied its purpose forever bound to this obsolete storage

[smolmzd-deactivated20150612]

am i glad it’s in there and we’re out here

[undergroundmonorail]

people reading fantasy novels ask “why did the ancient ones seal the evil away for ten thousand years instead of just killing it” but then we go ahead and do this shit

[thefingerfuckingfemalefury]

We have learned nothing from every fantasy novel ever O.O

[ayellowbirds]

The best part, from the wiki article: “According to its creator, the Morris worm was not written to cause damage, but to gauge the size of the Internet.”

It was intended to do good, but the programmer made a mistake and it got out of hand, becoming viral.

[dr-archeville]

R̴͓̮͈̞̿͐͛̏̒͂͊̾ͅE͉̝͍̹̣̺̿͗͟͝L̶͖̫͇͙̬ͬ͗͌͘E̻͔̳ͪͭ̑̔̉̉̑ͣ͝͝ͅẢ̲̳̝̗̮ͩS̼̮̠̦͍͈̳̝ͮ̌ͯͯ̌͆͗͠ͅEͦ̎̊͏̪͙̤̦͈̯̱͞͠ ̱̃ͥ̆̄M̛̝̘̺̥̙̱͚ͣ̋͊̚E̪̮͍̘̟̟͚͖͐

[hotcommunist-deactivated2019032]

the year is 28AW (after worm) and still we suffer

[superfluousspork]

Oh, w o r m

[princeofmints]

[b1rd1e]

What r u guys gonan b for halloween

[signalwave]

sad

[kitthecowboy-deactivated2020030]

gay

[rosegardnz]

sexy

[anarchohellenism]

goblin

[musicalhell]

[cutelittleanimalsthings]

How daring

[airyairyquitecontrary-deactivat]

Don’t worry, comrades, I’ll bust you outta there. To sustain you in the meantime, here is the tail off a lizard that I didn’t quite catch.

[pukicho]

If you were to vacuum up jello through a metal tube, well I think that’d be a neat noise 

[luteyandthemermaid]

i beg to differ 

[pukicho]

Then Beg

[demilypyro]

I never learned how to swim and at this point I’m too embarrassed to

[demilypyro]

We have dams dude this isnt fucking atlantis

[joey-wheeler-official]

yeah but they wont hold forever…

[demilypyro]

Underestimate the power of Dutch engineering again and I’ll obliterate you

[animedads-deactivated20210108]

In gonna replace every bone in my body with a knife, if someone punches me they’re in for a surprise (the knife)

[peachvers]

imagine if the oceans were replaced by forests and if you went into the forest the trees would get taller the deeper you went and there’d be thousands of undiscovered species and you could effectively walk across the ocean but the deeper you went, the darker it would be and the animals would get progressively scarier and more dangerous and instead of whales there’d be giant deer and just wow

[chandrar-nalaar]

you have a beautiful imagination

[iguanamouth]

[cultofplush]

this gave me chills

[peachy-faery]

you are my peach, you are my plum

[sarriane]

youre angle or youre devil

[icameas-roman]

Sun & Moon

[bettedavisgf]

me when a girl refers to her “partner”: 👀 me when i find out she was talking about her boyfriend with a beard: 😴

[hacash]

bi women when the lesbian you were talking to suddenly devalues you for dating a guy: 

[whirlibirdy]

woman finding out the lesbian shes talking to assumes her nb partner is a man:

[normalregularguy-deactivated201]

tony hawk landing the 1st ever 900 seen at the x games in 1999:

[weirdosrus42702]

Me when a straight person doesn’t understand the concept of the post but tries to be included

[normalregularguy-deactivated201]

tony hawk :

[crooked-antler-man]

An Asexual who’s pretty pumped about Tony Hawk gif

[avvocarlo]

[weather]

Odd flex but ok

[oncelerfucker69-deactivated2019]

where’s the pic of that guy’s tinder bio where he says something along the lines of “well i’m a fat fuck with a big truck. welcome to the shitshow.”

[targuzzler-deactivated20180224]

[oncelerfucker69-deactivated2019]

thanks. this is literally the best tinder bio ever

[incendavery]

no moment like the present moment

[twee-lil-paws]

This is the emotional polar opposite of this image:

[incendavery]

holy shit

[foxy-mulder-deactivated20190929]

this is the most powerful image on the internet.. reblog to join the circle

[yourbrothershotfriend]

Reblog to destroy all evil energies in your life