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just lazy

[blanklier]

i gave you a two-day break, so now you get another batch of hollanov fic recs! part 14 is here! it's even shorter this time.

all I need in this life of sin (is me and my boyfriend) teen, 2k, complete. there are a lot of tweets about the hollanov relationship. shane decides to start blocking people. ENTIRELY UNSERIOUS but it made me giggle.

ilya rozanov's favorite sex toy explicit, 6k, complete. part of a series. WOOF. this fic has it all. objectification, watersports (piss drinking), pet play, cock warming, and mild scarification. very, very fun, very hot.

spit take explicit, 6k, complete. ilya starts spitting in shane's food; half as a joke, half as a taunt. shane is entirely horny about it, even if it takes a while to get to admitting it. spit kink (obviously), tpe, free use, puppy play. fun fun fun. i just like the idea of corrupting every aspect of shane's life with ilya and vice versa.

just before you go mature, 4k, oneshot. shane gets appendicitis and needs to go to the hospital. this comes up mid-hookup. all around miserable, but really enjoyable for the Longing. tws for vomiting, illness, panic attacks and general hospital stuff.

walls explicit, 22k, complete. other people's looks into hollanov as they are together. i love outsider's pov, and i love the way it's framed here.

i get wet at the thought of you explicit, 5k, oneshot. pwp. shane leaks... kind of a lot of precome. he's insecure about it. ilya, obviously, disagrees. feminization, squirting, come as lube.

a tiny splinter on the tip of your finger teen, 2k, oneshot. troy wants to apologize for the past. shane... doesn't want to just let him. the troy barrett and shane hollander beef agenda never stopped, and this fic delivers so many bittersweet, trapped feelings.

future, in the abstract 5k, mature, oneshot. omegaverse. shane's birth control has been changed- something he had no knowledge of until now. a really interesting fic, with a lot of touching upon the horrors of having your body be controlled by an organization, and the general medical agony of knowing that something was done to it without your consent. very, very good.

nothing makes me feel as good teen, 4k, oneshot. jj's perspective on his captain over the years. (and a crush that he definitely doesn't have.) THE jj feels to me, okay.

breaking your ground explicit, 2k, oneshot. trying to leave the cottage is...harder than expected. GOD the sex in this. the prose. blew my dick clean off. fantastic. rough sex, outdoors sex, and generally a struggle in getting fucking anywhere because they're so attached to each other.

sublineation explicit, 3k, oneshot. ilya tattoos shane at the cottage. SO fun. if you know me you know i like some body mods as love. really fun d/s dynamic, some really fun ideas in here in general.

his sugar baby, his sour coach, his jock bro lady macbeth mature, 28k, complete. the hollander/rozanov rivalry ends before it can even begin, with a crash and a career-ending injury from one side to the other. boston bear ilya rozanov meets uni student shane hollander in a club years afterward. their relationship is full of maybes and could bes, and the memory of hockey and taken chances. OH MY GOD THIS FIC. SO fun, SO good, absolutely SO many delicious moments. the kip/shane dynamic in here has me in hysterics.

you can not see his soul mature, 37k, complete. shane hollander is a straight, undateable NPC the popular hockey-themed dating sim. shane hollander is gay, self-aware of the fact that the world is not working like it should, and has been hooking up with ilya rozanov since before their rookie season. things go wonky. a REALLY interesting au, concept-wise, with a very fun execution especially concerning the horror of living inside a world with pre-determined routes.

raise my heart rate mature, 26k, ongoing. shane hollander is a paramedic. ilya rozanov is a hockey player. it's not so much a meet-cute as a meet-ugly, shane may or may not be a sugar baby, and relationships continue to be complicated and miscommunication-full.

I'm just happy you still call unrated, 16k, oneshot, yuna-centric. yuna plays mahjong, gets fired, and tries to live through the reality of being someone. i love a good yuna fic, and this is incredible.

don't feed me (I will come back) mature, 40k, ongoing. ilya rozanov went to russia one summer and disappeared forever. shane hollander, retired, has turned to writing biographies instead- and he wants to do the man who was once his rival (his something) justice. he goes to irina rozanova's hometown, the last place he was seen. the woods are dark and deep, and a pale-haired dog with green eyes keeps coming to his yard.

mouth all bloody explicit, 9k, ongoing. part of a series. vampire au: shane has been a vampire for years. ilya is both very normal about this and not at all. bloodplay. banging my fists on the table THE VULNERABILITY. THE BLOOD. THE PREY/PREDATOR OF IT. ough.

the only option left explicit, 12k, complete. after the cottage, ilya needs to know that shane is being good, what he's doing, where he is. he turns to private detectives. it's more of a stalking kink than concern. fun fun fun. i love unhinged people.

sobriquet explicit, 3k, oneshot. coach/player roleplay. shane doesn't know what his coach is asking for, but he'll do it. just the tip and a delicious play at innocence that had me gnawing on a table leg.

rut waivers explicit, 9k, ongoing. omegaverse. alpha shane hollander is being traded from the metros- he's too uncontrollable, too wild. omega ilya asks his coach to trade them to him. he'll keep him in line. which might be easier if they hadn't been hooking up for years. so much fun worldbuilding! a really interesting take on a/o dynamics!

a well-organized life mature, 47k, complete. they have to schedule their days together. it's not not a sex calendar. genuinely fantastic character study and plot.

dear penpal, cry everyday until my next letter unrated, 125k, ongoing. a school assignment has ilya (elijah) and shane (his curious cat) sending letters and emails back and forth since they were 12. over the years, it turns from an assignment into a friendship. leaving the longest for last again (is this a habit now?) is this FANTASTIC fic. the way i am obsessed. i adore their exchanges, the growth (IT'S SO FANTASTIC AS A SLOW BURN!), the lovely vulnerability and care they show one another. do not let the wordcount intimidate you, it goes by extremely fast and you will be clutching your chest for half of it.

parts one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine ten eleven twelve thirteen

[mothsartart]

Down On The Ice, pt. 1

[balalaijka]

heated rivalry recs part 2 (part 1, part 3)

Teeth - the story of ilya rozanov as told by dental trauma, incredibly sharp prose that made my jaw ache in sympathy

sympathy fuck - if you ever thought about how quickly ilya went from "my dad's dead" to "hey let's fuck" and went huh, this is for you

nothing makes me feel as good - jj boiziau & his relationship with the terrifying creature that is shane hollander, really hits the sweet spot of shane's characterization as the guy who's so good at one thing that you either love him, hate him, or both

2.0 - people assume ilya is david's son more than shane, with all the heartbreak that comes with it

Decisions, Decisions - the slippery slope to 24/7 total power exchange, or as one comment puts it "Why did this FEEL like 22k of porn without there being ANY smut what so ever that's SKILL"

daisy chain - hanahaki, or the absolutely terrifying realization that if you get the surgery you will live but will you, really? if so much of yourself is caught up in one person?

crossfire - shane/ilya/marleau threesome that's just. so hot in that dripping-in-luxury-and-bad-decision-making way

advice from fools - shane hollander handles being a boyfriend (not ilya's) with uh. a certain amount of grace. which is zero. absolutely fascinating man

that'll leave a mark - i never get tired of "shane & the inherent violence of hockey" fics and this one also has beautiful outsider povs along the different fights

And a Sense of Guilt I Can't Deny - a yuna fic that made me ugly sob

A Longing as for Sin's Beguiling - the love triangle between you, the man you're attracted to and the man you've translated him as onto your desires

the drugs are cursed (and boys will be girls) series - trans man ilya, wonderful outsider pov and part 2 is such a good svetlana character study as well

A Friend of the Family - svetlana/jackie, gorgeously written and bittersweet

and he spoke the bridegroom fair - shane hollander vs the trials and tribulations of thinking about straight weddings

always, sun - magical realism, an eleven year old ilya makes a wish, but ofc nothing is so simple

buona sorte - svetlana and elena meet in italy, lovely prose

ballad of the bisexual terminator - aka “what if there was a love triangle between ilya and shane and sveta?” and the execution is incredible

a new orbit & clouds in my coffee - svetlana and rose respectively and their relationship to hollanov and to their life and careers

blender in a blender - of near-career ending injuries, scott hunter, threesomes and strawberries

In Tooth and Claw - ilya and the intersection of desire and sadism, or as alt-j says “i’ll eat you whole i love you so”

Then It Hits (That I’m Damned) - the yearning: “That gives Ilya pause. His stomach lurches, guilt rolling in his gut, but he quiets it with the promise of I can be good to him. I can make him see.”

bird with a magnet - shane hollander and the saw trap of not being one of rozanov’s girls/wanting to be desired: “A famine tears holes into his membrane of restraint, flirts fiercely with his underbelly and tugs at his wet mouth. He wishes Rozanov had leashed him to a wall instead of arousal. Before him, Shane had been doing so well.”

north american sentimentalities - ilya takes shane to russia

running down hills - situationship era sex and injuries and lovesickness

love sticks, sweat drips - shane throws down his gloves on the ice against ilya

skin still wet, still on my skin - jane and lily are wags. but like actually in this fic. the characterization is absolutely delicious

ptb - this fic gives you the terrifying experience of being stuck in shane's body and mind to a degree that's nearly claustrophobic, good stuff

apple tree, my brightness - moscow and decadent summers and flea markets and jewelry and yearning oh my

the marble leaves the man - a quote for your enjoyment and to pique your interest: "It’s not like Ilya wants to get arrested, or set his house on fire, anyway. So that means no more cops. No more firefighters."

at your service - if anyone remembers the post "shane hollander's anxiety alerts a service dog" this is the fic!!!!

Staring at the Sun - messy medical trauma and splintered remembering of trauma following a game that went horribly wrong for ilya

I'm Just Happy You Still Call - this is another beautiful yuna study that made me fall in love with her character all over again

ringtrue - a razor-sharp ilya character study built around violence and sexuality

The Blue Shore of Silence (Зов Пустоты) - the selkie irina fic

i looked over it and i ached - from the description: “I don’t really think about stuff like that,” Shane replies in interviews, his lips wooden at the words./Shane and being haafu, 2nd gen, and Asian.”, just. absolute gem of a character study

A Beginner's Guide to Light Weight Travel - "Svetlana is in love. This is nothing new. She is in love often." love love this, very sharp svetlana characterization

[lavenderprose]

For the consideration of the forum:

Rose and Shane (who are both closet cinephiles; Shane because he thinks it's embarrassing to have hobbies and Rose because being a cinephile as an actor just seems cringe to her) are working their way through one of those "100 movies to watch before you die" lists and finally get to Dirty Dancing.

"I can't believe you haven't seen this," Rose says, and Shane grumbles something about not really being a fan of the genre and well, their rule is that if they think the movie is stupid they can turn it off after an hour so Rose finds it on one of the 6000 streaming platforms Ilya pays for (the Fast and the Furious movies keep jumping around) and starts the stream fully expecting for Shane to exert his veto power in an hour.

And then he just doesn't. He sits there and watches the whole thing, mouth slightly open. Usually they talk at least a little bit about the plot or the cinematography (Shane has developed some opinions in that regard, mostly adopted from Rose whose opinions he takes as gospel by consequence of knowing next to nothing about the industry) but Shane is just. Rapt.

Then Ilya comes stalking into the living room towards the end of the movie and by pure coincidence he's wearing a black shirt and pants and Shane looks away from the TV for the first time in 90 minutes.

"Shane," he says, and puts two fingers on Shane's jaw, entirely chaste but extremely proprietary. "Have you seen my iPad?"

"Den," Shane says softly. "It's in the den."

Rose darts a look between Ilya, Patrick Swayze on the screen, and Shane's open-mouthed expression. Laughs for about four straight minutes.

[leaveamessage]

au where Ilya is a contestant on Love Island or some raunchy dating show where Shane is a producer. Gorgeous sun-god hockey-star Ilya is quite popular (duh) and loves to go all-out on every challenge, like fully committing to diving into foam pits and getting slimed and making out with everyone, meanwhile Shane is planning all these events with the goal of just seeing Ilya take off his shirt again. It obviously gets super competitive between them, Shane concocting more audience-approved twists and Ilya taking it like a champ while becoming increasingly obsessed with Shane, despite also being a favorite to win the show with a (very lovely) woman. They’re also definitely almost-fucking off-set during breaks, and predictably feel guilty about it but not enough to stop. Big dramatic finish to the show when Ilya very publicly goes after Shane, maybe taking second place just to declare his love

[aslongasitsblack]

Ilya voice while planning summer vacation and shane asks where he wants to go As long as you wear those little shorts…I will be happy

shane voice Obviously I’m going to wear the little shorts. can you please contribute to the discussion

[aslongasitsblack]

(@loontattoo)

[bearthewhipsandscornsoftime]

Couldn’t stop thinking about that poor travel agent

[hollanovbiter]

pov shane and ilya decide to be boyfriends at the cottage, but then shane is such a bad texter and caller afterwards that ilya thinks he changed his mind. because ilya is texting asking how his day went <3 and shane’s just like fine. had practice.

ilya is calling him just to hear his voice and shane is like ??? why are you calling me?? is everything okay? are you sad about your brother again?

ilya is sending nudes and shane is immediately deleting them and not acknowledging them because he’s scared of his phone getting hacked

finally when ilya comes to visit for the first time he’s like my shane ?? do you want to break up? and shane’s like no!!! never!!! tears are in his eyes. ‘why would i want to break up?!!!’ and ilya’s like well you never return my bids for attention….

shane feels awful and starts to learn the social norms around Boyfriending <3

[lexicanons]

Omegaverse AU where Shane doesn’t get a chance to run away during tuna melt-gate because Beta Shane and Alpha Ilya accidentally bond on Ilya’s couch. Ilya can no longer play hockey because bonded Alphas can be aggressive and endanger the other players. Shane is worried Ilya will hate him for taking him away from hockey but Ilya isn’t that broken up about it because 1) he gets Shane, 2) he moves to Canada and gets citizenship, 3) he doesn’t have to go back to Russia, and 4) when his family ask him for money, he can rightfully say that he no longer has a job and can’t support them. When they ask about Shane’s money, he tells them he’s beta runs a strict program and he doesn’t have access to any of his money. That’s not true, Shane lets Ilya get whatever he wants because he still feels guilty over the bonding and him being forced out of hockey, but they don’t have to know that.

[beehivedemocracy]

Ilya coming home to Shane being overstimulated and agitated and he thinks it's best to leave him alone mostly so he goes off and does his own thing and eventually ends up on the couch playing a video game and Shane comes out of nowhere, noise canceling headphones on and hobby of the day in hand (book, knitting, switch, coloring, could be basically anything) and sits next to him which Ilya thinks is really sweet and then Shane very softly asks "are you avoiding me because I'm being weird and quiet again" and Ilya sees his whole life flash before his eyes, every mistake he's ever made, mostly this specific one, and rapidly starts explaining himself and Shane ultimately finds it sweet just nods and stays were he is, doing his thing now with a little smile on his face

[shilyas]

And suddenly Ilya looked very blurry through Shane’s eyes. Shane swallowed down the urge to cry, and said, “Me too. Just one.” — Heated Rivalry (Chapter 26)

while Ilya is saying this matter-of-factly, it's also to reassure the Hollanders that he's serious about their son. but Shane is hearing this for the first time, too. he's now learned that he has been & is the only one for Ilya. his reaction is so precious. ♡

[snail-mail-33]

dumb questions the Boston Raiders would (want to) ask Ilya about gay (sex) if they knew about Hollanov

Does it still count for the playoffs sex ban if it's with a dude? You know, like the poophole loophole. No I'm not asking for me! Wait that's not why you picked a man right?

Can I bring my girlfriend when we go to Boston Pride? Or is that not allowed?

Do you guys just get to leave the toilet seat up at home?

Are men better at sucking dicks?

Wait so were you lying about liking Dunkin too because I thought gay people prefer Starbucks?

Aren't you sad you'll never be able to do to it raw? And the follow-ups: doesn't it make your dick smell like ass? Wait but you never have to worry about getting pregnant that's awesome bro.

Are you going to make me vote now?

How can you tell you're like actually into dudes? Because like I can look at a dude and go “yeah he's hot” but I don't want to bang him

Aww man you must miss pizza. Because of the gluten. I thought gay people can't have it?

If you got married who would be the groom?

If you could suck your own dick, do you think you'd be more turned on by having your dick sucked or by doing the sucking?

Does this mean they'll let us in the gay clubs now? Because we've got a gay.

So who nags you to put your socks in the hamper? Dude you guys must have socks everywhere.

Did you just bang all those chicks so people wouldn't think you're gay? Because I think you might have overdone it bro.

Is that why Hollander randomly started dressing well? Because he turned gay?

Who sends you the flags? Have you got yours yet?

How the fuck did you know he was gay before you hit on him? Or have you just been trying to pull half the league and Hollander's the only one that took the bait. Wait did you hit on Scott Hunter?

(drunk and emotional) please don't have Hollander’s babies until after you've retired. We need your body for hockey

I just can't get my head around what you guys do together. Like do you just hang out doing dude shit and then fuck? Like do you play Xbox and then suck each other off? Because that sounds awesome.

Have you ever got turned on by your own dick?

I thought you had to go to college to be gay?

[hollanovshome]

drew this in a fugue state last night @aslongasitsblack

starting to realize my art can be best described as crack taken seriously

[medrawawi]

🤲

[rocketpunchhh]

she knows she's the only one who can get away with that

[shane-bug]

👨‍❤️‍👨

[dictearchive]

[grabmyboner]

shut up im gonna puke at the idea the twin hollanders think that their papa’s name is baby and their dada’s name is actually a long whining sound of shane (shaaaaaaane) alsjdjsksksdk like they go to kindergarten and do those lil kid questionnaires that the teacher actually fills out from their verbal responses and their answers are almost identical: what’s your name? (insert whatever nickname they get called regularly and then their actual name). what is your favourite colour? red (for both twins). what is your favourite sport? hockey (obviously). what are your parents names? papa’s name is baby and dada’s name is shaaaaane. and then it comes home in their backpacks the day that yuna and david pick them up from kindie and david opens the door when he sees ilya and shane pull up after practice and says “howdy baby and shaaaaane” and they’re both like “haha what?” and then he hands them the twins questionnaires and they both go a little rosy cheeked and yuna walks down the stairs and is like “oh is that baby and shaaaaaane?” and it’s a joke for the rest of their lives. it makes its way to the cens players eventually and oh boy do they have fun with that.