The Bi-ace Rose @biacerose - Tumblr Blog

Tbh i find the superiority complex undercurrents in all this asexual discourse so disgusting lol. Also it’s really apparent when gay coded characters mention anything about relationships being non-sexual that the ace community jumps on that character for rep, it’s obvious that they just view gays as hypersexual or w/e. I’m just sayin there’s some rampant homophobia in the asexual discourse stuff and it’s really not cute. Going back to the superiority complex, a lot of adults will preach this retoric that anyone who isn’t asexual is disgusting or sex obsessed, and tbh it’s really concerning for me. If i was younger and i saw an adult saying that people have to be hypersexual to be non-ace or that anyone who’s not ace is disgusting or dirty i would think that i was disgusting and flawed! This isn’t articulated but im just so sick of the blatant homophobia and the superiority complex shit! Like it’s really disgusting that adults think my top priority is sex all because I don’t ID as asexual! Me and a lot of people adults target to ridicule are minors lol! Idk, i’m just thinking out loud here. Sorry im not very articulated on this.

biacerose

you are making some pretty big claims with no sources. can you link to some posts that actually do this?

because I havent seen any and most of the aces I know would call this stuff out.

also a lot of aces who are LGBTQ+ under other axes eg. bi aces like me, lesbian aces etc. exist and your posts is super alienating for aces like me. who 1. like to see our orientations represented and are the most likely to headcanon characters as like bi and ace or gay and ace.. so like a character can be both.

and the stuff you wrote about “If i was younger and i saw an adult saying that people have to be hypersexual to be non-ace” what..are you talking about? because hypersexualility has nothing to do with being ace or non ace. in fact I know some aces talk about being hypersexual and ace.

maybe you don’t understand what asexuality means, or what hypersexuality means.

but also id like sources for all these claims you are making about the ace community. Im not saying that this never happens but you are basically saying the whole community is like that, with no proof and from my experience it isn’t

so from my perspective you are spreading nasty stereotypes about a whole orientation of people based on nothing but your own misunderstandings, which ironically is what you are accusing them of doing.. and its pretty gross.

and it is especially suspect when it seems you do not have enough contact or understanding of the ace community to actually use terms correctly.. so.. im inclined to trust my own experiences of the ace community.. which in general works to call out homophobia, is made up in a large portion of people who also have other LGBTQ+ identities and so are sensitive to that stuff, and also works extreemly hard to educate that asexuality is not about “not wanting sex” its an orientation about attraction, and so says nothing about an asexuals sex life, just like being non-asexual says nothing about a non-sexual’s sex life.

the people who are perpetuating that asexuality is about “not-having sex” and therefore being non-asexual is, are exclusionists who continue to spread misinformation about the definition of asexuality even after being told multiple times by the ace community that that is not what asexuality means or is about.

messynblesbian

inclusionists stop using bi and pan ppl as pawns when ur a big ass homophobe

biacerose

YOU ARE NOT EVEN BI WHAT FUCKING GALL TELLING BI PEOPLE WE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO TALK ABOUT THE SIMILARITIES BETWEEN OUR EXPERIENCES JUST BECAUSE YOU DONT WANT TO HEAR THEM. you are being a big ass biphobe speaking over bi people just because they disagree with you.

MOST of the people making comparisons between bi and ace discourse are bi or pan. MOST of the people talking about the overlap between bi pan and ace experiences are bi/pan and aspec. In fact nearly every instance I have seen of someone talking about bi pan and ace together HAVE been bi or pan, or at least biromantic/panromatic.

And bi/pan/ace experiences for a lot of people are incredably overlapped. A LOT of pan/bi/ace people id as the other identities as well, or along the way to settling in the label they currently fit in.

An inclusionist who is a biromantic asexual has more right to talk about bi experiences then a lesbian who has decided that they “know better”.

Stop being actively bi phobic by telling a SEXUALITY YOU ARE NOT EVEN PART OF that because we disagree with you we are somehow wrong about our own identities.

messynblesbian

i never said anything abt bi people talking abt their experience, i was talking about the homophobic/transphobic cishet people that use the bi/pan experience as a debate point while being actively lgbtphobic.

biacerose

no you said inclusionists. you actively ERASED thatA HUGE portion of inclusionists are bi. you cant erase that just because you disagree with them. and nearly ever single inclusionist post i have seen talk about bi and ace similarities as been by a bi person.

if you only met “cishet” then you need to include that because cishet inclusionists make 2% of the inclusionists who post on this site.

If you just assume every inclusionist you meet is cishet, it is 88% certain you are wrong. Most of the inclusionists active in the discourse are not cishet. and a huge portion of them are pan or bi.

so yeah, shut up about things you obviously know nothing about.

messynblesbian

inclusionists stop using bi and pan ppl as pawns when ur a big ass homophobe

biacerose

An inclusionist who is a biromantic asexual has more right to talk about bi experiences then a lesbian who has decided that they “know better”.

Stop being actively bi phobic by telling a SEXUALITY YOU ARE NOT EVEN PART OF that because we disagree with you we are somehow wrong about our own identities.

#ace discourse

vixentea

How to read books and watch movies and TV for free.

the easiest, (and most legitimate) way to have access to free books, tv, and film is through your local library. Checking out from the library is also a way to help your library maintain funding, (because they can show proof people are using them), so not only will you be getting to read and see things for free, you will be helping your local community by doing so.

Some libraries also allow you to check out ebooks, from their websites, so have a look at what your local has to offer.

Another reason to join your local library is if you have a library card you can use it to download books, flims, music etc. from hoopla.

Legitimate sources for things

trail subscriptions for free: (you will need credit card details for some of these so remember to cancel the Subscription before the trail ends (and check “dont auto renew, if it gives you the option).) (some of these are also region specific)

Books

You can get a free audiobook with the free trial of audible.

Movies and tv shows.

Hulu (one month)

Netflix (one month)

Amazon prime (one month)

Crunchyroll (two weeks)

hbo. (one month)

Remember to check out the websites of the channels your show airs on, (like the CW, the BBC) sometimes they stream the shows for a time after it airs or have “box sets” of old shows to watch. However, this method often is region locked. so unless you have a VPN, you will only be able to access channels in your country with this method.)

Other Discounts, cheap stuff and free stuff;

if you are a student be sure to check if they have any discounts, a lot of places do, even if they don’t make them really easy to spot. for example, if you think you would get a lot of use out of amazon prime, they do offer a student discount for the subscription, which is reasonable.

if you are in the uk, “hot uk deals” is a user-sourced website where people post about sales to get things cheaply. this includes foodstuff, and high-end items, (and coupons for restaurants) it takes a bit of sifting through but if you want to make a big purchase and you live in the UK, its an option to save you a bit here and there.

speaking of coupons:

finding coupons easily:

another way to find coupons and sales

Don’t forget hot uk deals

App that automatically searches for coupons when you are shopping online

Watching things through streaming:

Anime

Movies

Movies and television

Television (s just google “couch tuner” as sometimes the url can change)

Live Television

Kdramas (just google “dramafire”if url changes)

If you are anxious about watching streams on sketch sites this tumblr post tells you how to protect yourself.

Finding ebooks.

Lots of PDFs, including some of popular books

Comics

Googling “[insert book name’] pdf” is also a surefire way to find shit, including entire novels.

if you want to convert them to go on your ereader

Calibre library is not only a great way to store your ebooks, but can convert ebooks into different formats.

#free stuff

themintycupcake

I don’t care if you use SGA to describe yourself and your experiences, you do you. The reason why nb people have a problem is when you claim SGA as a “requirement” for queerness. Telling us “you’re nb so you fit under the T so shut up” isn’t addressing the problem.

Whenever you say things like “SGA is a requirement for being bi/pan/ply” you’re tossing us under the bus in more ways than one. First, it makes some really odd implications about our sexualities if SGA is an incoherent concept to us. That’s why we’re not satisfied with just being “under the T.” Our orientations matter to us, too.

Second, it makes odd implications about our partners. If a non-SGA bi person is automatically fetishizing us, how would that magically be OK if they’re SGA? Not to mention it’s pretty weird and creepy when someone tries to claim that someone else is fetishizing you just for being attracted to you. I’ll make my own judgements on that, I don’t need this condescention. Especially if you’re binary or younger than me, get out of here.

In short, when an nb person gets upset with the term SGA, then you should listen to why. If we’re LGBT by means of fitting under the T, as you so claim, then we deserve to have our concerns heard and addressed.

courteousmingler

y’know i typed this up a while ago to be part of a larger post, but i feel like it also deserves a post of its own.

it’s meant to emphasize how acephobe rhetoric is recycled TWERF rhetoric, with the only differences being which oppressed group is being attacked, and which privileged group that oppressed group is accused of being part of. it’s precisely the same tactic. and unfortunately i’ve read enough TWERF and acephobe arguments to type out their talking points nearly from memory. which is kind of depressing, since it kind of illustrates how long i’ve been arguing with these people.

enbies and otherwise, the TWERF/acephobe post:

“These people are invading our safe spaces with no respect for whether we approve of them being here, or even feel safe with them here. The fact that they can not respect the boundaries we’ve set is evidence of their privilege- despite their claims that they’re an oppressed group,

Their unrelenting insistence on invading our spaces is proof of their oppressive intentions. They claim to face discrimination, but all evidence of such is circumstantial and unscientific. Truthfully, the only time in which they face marginalization, is when people mistake them for us. They’re lying about the oppression they face so that they can rob us of the resources that are meant to help us with our struggles- struggles they keep claiming they face, providing heaps and heaps of meaningless, flawed evidence.

They claim that they’re raped for who they are- when the reality is that these rapes are the result of misogyny, and not evidence of some non-existent oppressive force. In the name of keeping each other safe and protecting our history, we need to force these privileged oppressors out by any means necessary.

Their sob stories become meaningless when they refuse to respect the fact that they are not wanted here. To put it frankly, they do not fit any definition of what allows someone to be with us in our community. They do not fit any definition of an oppressed group, no matter how much they whine otherwise.

We can not allow ourselves to be swayed by proper members of our community who sympathize with these privileged individuals. These sympathizers are falling sick to internalized bigotry toward their own community- this is the only reason they would attempt to allow our oppressors into our spaces. They’ve been deceived by the falsified person stories of “discrimination” given by the privileged individuals who are pretending to share in our oppression.

The fact that they would tout flawed studies in an attempt to convince us of their oppression is merely them flexing their privilege over us.

Make no mistake: The privileged group they are part of is incapable of facing the oppression we face. As a matter of fact, they’re RESPONSIBLE for the oppression we face. Their kind have spent centuries persecuting us, and we can’t decide to let them close enough to harm us just because they’ve fabricated a few sob stories. They claim that our definition of who belongs in our community is flawed, when they’re simply enraged about their inability to take advantage of us.

These privileged individuals spit in our faces by claiming to face the oppression we face. Many of them even have the nerve to claim that we are reinforcing their oppression, or that we carry privilege over them. For them to claim that we carry privilege over them is one of the most horrendous acts of bigotry I’ve ever encountered, and can’t be tolerated.

They ignore that we have members of our community who fit the description of their so called “oppressed group”, individuals who fit the definition of both our community and theirs. And as they haven’t been brainwashed by these ahistoric bigots, they also see that it is imperative we keep these people away from us by any means necessary. Those who refuse to respect our wishes do not deserve our sympathy. They do not deserve a place in this community.

Safe spaces must exclude some people, or else the oppressors we’re seeking safety from can find us at any time. The ignorant liberal idea of an all inclusive safe space is not a safe space at all, and the fact you wish to invite our oppressors in proves that.”

exclusionists are the same.

courteousmingler

let’s add to this.

And now our privileged oppressors see fit to misguide our children! These disgusting predators are influencing the sexual identities of children. If that is not a disturbing warning sign to how depraved they are, nothing will be. By which I mean they are attempting to ‘educate’ children about these identities, in the hopes that they can confuse these children into identifying that way, when otherwise their identities would align with our own.

Insisting that children be taught about the existence of these identities is creepy at best, predatory at worst. They’re asking for intimate knowledge about these children so that they can assign them with one of their nonsensical labels.

and finally…

These infiltrators claim that we are privileged for precisely the same thing that makes us oppressed. How do they expect us to believe that their oppression is legitimate when they claim that we are privileged as a result of our marginalized identity? An identity that has gotten us violently discriminated against, beaten, killed?

Nevermind their claims that the portion of our identity we’re persecuted for is separate from the portion of identity we hold privilege for. Their flawed understanding of oppression is proof that their claims are ridiculous, and that they hold privilege over us.

biphobes who think “bihet” people exist…TWERFs…acephobes.

all exclusionists use exactly the same rhetoric.

acephobe arguments are recycled TWERF arguments. tell your friends

courteousmingler

@evilallolesbian

courteousmingler

to be honest, it felt like talking to a TERF. just on the subject of ace discourse. all the insistence on redefining terms so that you can paint an oppressed group as being a privileged group. just felt eerily familiar. laughing in the face of the words “high suicide rate” also felt familiar. and it made me the same type of angry.

glaschus-deactivated20160306

Calling a trans woman a TERF, fucking yikes, my dude.

courteousmingler

though i can understand where you’re coming from, i’m discussing my personal feelings here, and was comparing how i feel talking to a TERF to how i felt talking to her. every time i talked about the suffering of others, she made a joke out of it, when she wasn’t talking about how the oppressed group i was trying to defend was actually a privileged group that deserved to be demonized. and it all just felt familiar to me, the cruel indifference.

i didn’t mean to call her one in the literal sense, because not only is she a trans woman, but we weren’t even discussing trans issues for the most part. i just typed down the comparison because i was angry and it was a type of anger i’d felt before, and i wanted to take note of that.

and also. i think it’s ironic that you tagged this as transmisogyny when you literally called me a dude just now. i’m not a dude, and even if i was, i certainly wouldn’t be yours.

glaschus-deactivated20160306

LOL, it’s never okay to equate an oppressed person with their oppresors, ever. Also, I think we’re both reading different posts, because all I saw was her saying cishets are not LGBT.

Also, it’s jokes, my guy.

averylargecat

I really REALLY hope the oppressed group the person you’re talking to is on about isn’t asexuals.

glaschus-deactivated20160306

How my money do I owe you for guessing that in one go?

homoelitism-archive-blog

I thought the ace community was about to hit rock bottom but apparently it just keeps sinking deeper and deeper in its own trash

courteousmingler

i know right? how dare they ask for basic respect and inclusion? how dare they ask for their identities to be treated as valid, and not to be painted with the same brush as their oppressor simply because they don’t fit into your acephobic preconceived boxes? what trash, right?

does your asshole get jealous of all the bigoted shit that spews out your mouth?

though, despite ace people facing an oppression that ALSO expresses itself in similar ways- and despite more and more people identifying as SGA/ace, or trans/ace, or all three- we deny them a place in the community by ignoring any and all oppression they face, and equating them to their fucking oppressors?

also. i’m not ace. i’m a lesbian trans woman who is not ace. i just despise the way they’re treated by the rest of the community. and yes, i said the rest of the community, because here’s another “trash” opinion of mine: ace people are going through a pivotal time in the development of their community, and excluding them at a point like this is nothing less than an act of violence. straight trans people have a place in the community on the grounds of being trans, and straight ace people have a place in the community on the grounds of being ace.

whatever you refer to the community as- the LGBT(etc) community, the MOGAI community, the q*eer community, it’s a community for those who face oppression based on their sexual, romantic, or gender identity- a definition that only faced backlash in the face of people realizing that it applied to aces.

you’ll mince whatever words and bend whatever definitions, and do whatever mental fucking gymnastics you have to to invalidate their oppression, invalidate their identities, and demonize them by equating them with their oppressors- all so you can mock them and deny them a safe space.

and you’ll do anything you need to to deny them the language that will allow them to separate themselves and form safe spaces of their own, so you can keep them alienated and keep that suicide rate skyrocketing.

the “trash” that the ace community apparently puts forward is them acting out against the social violence you’re enacting against them.

aro/aces are incapable of being cishet. a person who experiences no attraction whatsoever cannot be put into a box of people who experience attraction exclusively to one other gender, because they don’t fit that definition in any way whatsoever, and do not carry its privileges. ace people don’t experience homophobia, but they experience a similar form of oppression in the centuries of corrective rape, marital rape, and abusive therapies designed to “fix” them.

the only real reason for trans and SGA people to share a community is that they A. face similar forms of oppression and feel stronger standing in solidarity as one community, and B. the high rate of people that are both trans and SGA.

i don’t care if i eventually have every filthy grimey acephobe on this damn website arguing with me on this. i can handle your condescending dismissiveness of ace lives coupled with your pretty pink blogs. and you can attack me for daring to discuss how, in my personal experience as a trans woman, your cruelty and dismissiveness on the subject of ace lives reminded me of my interactions with TERFs and their mocking dismissiveness of trans lives.

this is the part where you equate ace people with their oppressors in order to explain why you think we should exclude them from our safe space as their suicide rate rises. or you can make a hilarious joke trivializing all this and driving home the point that you care literally nothing about rising teen suicides, as long as those teens are ace, and as long as you get to keep mocking them and denying them their place in a community that could give them solace.

courteousmingler

also @glaschus i don’t care if you’re joking please stop blatantly misgendering me in a mocking tone?? like i made it clear to you i was uncomfortable with being called “dude” and you obviously made the informed decision to then call me “guy”?? like you’re blatantly misgendering me in a mocking attempt to upset me and it’s REALLY FUCKING TRANSPHOBIC?’

i’m going to say it in no unclear terms: i’m not comfortable being called “dude” or “guy”, no matter the context. it triggers feelings of gender dysphoria for me and it’s really upsetting and transphobic to have you misgender me like this.

winterywitch

discoursers tend to define “straight” as anything from “actually heterosexual” to “assumed heterosexual/has the wonderful privileged privilege of being locked in the closet against their will” and “whatever the fuck we want it to mean so we don’t have to acknowledge how fucked up, biphobic, transphobic, aphobic and ableist we’ve been this whole time”

cryptidandrew

queerascat

one of many reasons why “QUEER” means so much to me.

[ IMAGE: a long, white image with “QUEER” faded in rainbow gradient in the background behind text written using various fonts in various sizes, colors and line-weight reading “sometimes identity is a journey. so far mine has gone something like this – queerascat.tumblr.com – HOLY SHIT, i’m BISEXU– wait, no, i’m PANSEXUAL! oh, but demisexuality? i’m DEMI-PANSEXUAL! but wait, what if i’m a LESBIAN??? no, WAIT! i’m NOT EVEN FEMALE!!! (no shit sherlock! plus you like who you like of any gender!) oh god, not even demi, TOTALLY ACE after all… shiiiiittt… panromantic ace! biromantic ace? PANro and BIro ACE! lolol wtf was i ever even thinking??? OF COURSE i’m a BI (sans ‘romantic’) & PAN (sans ‘romantic’) ACE. but grayro? quoiro? BI-PAN-GRAY-QUOIRO?? ugh, what the fuck ever. i’ll use whichever word(s) whenever it feels right to do so, but QUEER is the one word that has ALWAYS felt right. - Vesper 09/23/2016" ]

#this is me #i mean this is exactly what my thought process was like

queerlection

[Image description - Image of the purple queer chevrons with the text: QUEER AS IN FUCK YOU. End description.]

vaspider

*SCREAMS IN UNFETTERED JOY* I love itttt I love it I love ittttt

thisisntgoodbi-deactivated20160

The only way to rationalize that gay people and trans people share a common oppressor is to conceptualize their oppression (homophobia and transphobia) as having a common root: cisheterosexism.

Here’s the thing: it’s impossible to examine cisheterosexism with any kind of intellectual honesty without recognizing that it has more than two arms.

As soon as you propose a model wherein a single oppressor class holds privilege in different ways over different groups with little in common, it’s your moral obligation to look for other groups, who may be harmed in different ways than you, but who are harmed by your shared oppressor.

If you want to marry homophobia and transphobia under a shared model, then you must also adopt intersexism, binarism, biphobia, ace- and arophobia, and even toxic monogamy into your concept of cisheterosexism. This is what shared oppression looks like: not identical experiences, but diverse experiences under an identical oppressor.

And now it’s your responsibility to recognize that we’re all in this together; that fighting only to uplift yourself will keep the oppressor class in power, because it has other systems in place; that it is our obligation to justice and to ourselves to fight united and for each other, to dismantle the class that oppresses us all.

microwavetimemachine

This is what I’ve been saying! Except we need to include the necessary intersections that class and race play in cisheterosexism.

bizexuals

alright, so thanks to the suggestions of @istudyhumanhope i’ve updated the single-chevron version to include an off-white color. i don’t know if i’m super happy with the ace version, but i’m working on it & the classic rainbow flag in versions more similar to the bi/pan flags.

tagging @vaspider @wetwareproblem @theangrybi @queerflag @vergess because i’ve seen them hopping around these posts

if you have a request for me, shoot me a message & i’ll see what i can do

**these are free to use/modify as you see fit. including the color combinations, weights & number of chevrons. they may be used as icons/headers**

istudyhumanhope

Because I liked @officialqueer s idea with queer + other pride flag combos, I tried some (yay insomnia!! also, these are only drafts)

1. Queer Pride - explanation here

2. Bi Queer - Took the bi flag and the pink and the blue, made it pastelish to fit the theme, the middle purples are the lavender from the queer flag 3. Pan Queer - First stripe is from the Queer Flag, the other ones from the pan flag, again pastelish

4. Trans Queer - The stripes are from the flag, made pastelish 5. Non Binary Queer - The middletwo stripes are from the Queer Flag, the uter once from a Non Binary Flag - pastelish

6. Ace Queer - Besides the second one, wich is from the Queer Flag, the stripes are pastlish versions of the ace flag, the last one is still…uagh…i need to make that better 7. Aro Queer - Took the colors of my fav aro flag (I am aro myself) besides the black and made them pastelish

8. Lesbian Queer - These colors are original from the Lesbian Flag, the middle four 9. Gay Queer - This is an expirement (I mean, they all are but like…this one even more)…Rainbowflag in the background, pastelish + Strieps from the Queer flag, as when we combine all the colors we would get white so we don’t need it again

I also thought about an intersex flag, just a yellow brackgound maybe, as the ring on it is also purple? and the darker stripe maybe fixed closer to the actual color? besides that I did not put more thoughts in there - but I’ll do it if requested! I mean, its still just an idea, but putting some colors on is a quick thing (:

- Luca

istudyhumanhope

Hey people, Luca does have a twitter if you are interested to like contact them somewhere?

Also, we are both so thankful for all theses likes and reblogs, seriously! It makes us so happy to see you like the designs Luca made out of the idea of officialqueer !! You are free to use them already if you want to or create your own personal one, please @ us if you do bc we want to know and want to seeee

goodpositivitylgbt

Listen up!

Heterosexual aromantics are LGBTQIA+ if they choose to identify that way

Heteroromantic asexuals are LGBTQIA+ if they choose to identify that way

Cis aroaces are LGBTQIA+ if they choose to identify that way

Thanks.

ace-and-proud

Just a lovely reminder that demisexuals and demiromantics are a part of this community too and deserve to be respected.

andthenweloved

i honestly can’t believe that the aphobic discourse is still going on on this blue site of hell, so here is some positivity ✌

Trending Blogs

Recently Viewed Blogs

The Bi-ace Rose