Prodigious Skill And No Conscience

Biggest Jily Shipper since James Potter himself/fanfiction writer/maker of headcanons/sometimes I'll post stuff/submit headcanons if you want

[when-in-doubt-be-gay]

Is there anything that makes me happier than the Harry Potter cast basically saying "fuck you JKR" and speaking up against transphobia? The answer is no

[luckys-last-brain-cell]

When people go “omg I can’t believe JK Rowling turned out like this” I like to point them to her depiction of the goblins as a very early example of her bigotry.

[tashaneva]

charlie weasley (age 12) meets newt scamander (age 87)

(on twitter)

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

[courtneygodbey]

“Luna had decorated her bedroom ceiling with five beautifully painted faces: Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny, and Neville. They were not moving as the portraits at Hogwarts moved, but there was a certain magic about them all the same; Harry thought they breathed. What appeared to be fine golden chains wove around the pictures, linking them together, but after examining them for a minute or so, Harry realized that the chains were actually one word, repeated a thousand times in golden ink: friends…friends…friends…friends… Harry felt a great rush of affection for Luna” – Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows

[diarygirls]

i could literally make a giant chart of how every single event in harry potter books 5-7 parallels books 1-3 with book 4 (specifically, cedric’s death) as the turning point but i won’t do that but i could. 

[diarygirls]

turns out i did actually do that. 

please enjoy it’s 2am and this all came from my own fevered brain so apologies for the formatting and any mistakes 

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

The fact that Snape is one of the youngest if not THE youngest professor is fucking hilarious.

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

Like how does he get away with half the shit he does like almost everyone there has taught him since he was 11 and they just see this 21 year old just walk back in like "Sup fuckers I'm a professor now by force better so you better start treating me like one."

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

7th years in the school are like probably "Didn't this fucker graduate 3 years ago?"

[maybeshesnaped]

Imagine being a fourth year who has done /said something to your classmate Snape and then in your 7th year he's your TEACHER

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

THAT'S LOCKHART THAT'S LITERALLY LOCKHART LIKE

1. He Went to School with Snape

2. Got taught by Snape

3. Became part of the Staff like Snape

And the Fact that he's acting like he knew shit about potions is hilarious cause you just got Snape in the corner like

"Listen here you little shit . I taught you. I've seen your test scores. I graded those shits and you coming in here talking about being able to come up with an antidote?...Sit down."

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

The more people reblog this the more shock I am that they didnt know Snape started teaching at like 21 and he's like 30 first book

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

People in the tags for the past week having been confused and going bananas so like we gonna forget about the movies. Because the movies got it all wrong

Snape is 31

Hagrid is 63

Professor Mcgonagall is 56

Lupin and Sirius and Peter (3rd movie/book) 33

Dumbledore is 112

Do what you will with this info fam

[bluthatesfabrikk]

You forgot Burbage. In the books, she's in her twenties.

[the-witches-son]

Bringing this back around, when Snape started teaching in Aug/September 1981, he was 21

In Aug/September 1981, Lockhart was 17 :')

[cokeworthprince]

lockhart, 17, never fucking learned how to read: actually professor ;-)

snape, professorially, as if he hasn’t just had his last growth spurt: on god, i’ll smack the shit out you. put—your hand—down.

[d-cookie-deactivated20210317]

[danse-de-macabre]

@cokeworthcauldrons , your tags are fantastic

[electronicdelusionstarlight]

Harry Potter had a crush on Cho specifically because she was good at Quidditch, and could go toe to toe with him as a seeker. Harry Potter started developing feelings for Ginny after she joined the Quidditch Team, and their first kiss happen as a celebration of winning a important match for the house cup, and she will later become a freaking professional quidditch player.

Harry Potter is into jocks. Harry Potter is into jocks that, specifically, could kick his ass at his favorite sport.

I feel like this is an important thing to know about the guy.

[m4ge-deactivated20210331]

(jk rowling voice) harry gets pegged

[danahatesyou2]

This boy is trying to get a nude from my friend but she’s just acting like she doesn’t know what “a nude” is.

[flaming-fruitcake-deactivated20]

Lawful chaotic

[wet-monsoon]

target security guard: *sees me enter through the front on their monitor*

target security guard: isn’t that the stupid bitch that always comes in and buys literally any t shirt we have with garfield on it

me: *grabs the nearest garfield crop top and tosses it into my cart*

target security guard: ………….. yeah. that’s the one.

[wet-monsoon]

2d reenactment

[alessiajontrunfio]

Promise

[almooneh]

WOWOWOWOOWOWOWOWIWIW

[cryingblogger]

this is the best shirt I’ve ever seen

[cryingblogger]

this post is so funny to me because it was my first ever post that got this many notes, all off of these shitty quality photos i took of my friends shirt in our hotel in cancun and now i see these two pics everywhere, on people insta stories that have like 20k followers….all of this from my shitty iphone camera

[justsomeantifas]

yeah sure poor people who are also bad with money exist but it’s still not an excuse to justify not paying your employees a livable wage.

like mr. billionaire with the 8th yacht this week is going to preach to poor people buying a new couch they probably didn’t need but wanted because their kids fucked up the other one.

fuck off.

[justsomeantifas]

poor person: i got new clothes for work because i’m expected to look good for work and now i’m kinda worried about if i’ll be able to pay some bills this month. oof.

rich person with an eight-thousand-dollar suit who drives a tesla: you should spend your money less frivolously.

[justsomeantifas]

poor person: i took my kid out to a restaurant for their birthday and now i’m having trouble paying for gas.

rich person who underpays said poor person: you know you can save hundreds of dollars just by not buying all your coffee at cafes.

poor person: i genuinely don’t know what planet you live on but i do not buy coffee at a cafe.

rich person: why does no one appreciate my great financial advice?

[justsomeantifas]

poor person: finally got a food card because i’ve been struggling to afford food

rich person who knows full well all jobs require you have a phone: just sell your phone. you know … something that will get you money once and then you’ll never be able to replace it… effectively losing yourself money.

poor person: hey, quick question, but do you ever listen to yourself talk? like do you ever really think about what you’re saying? just wondering.

[justsomeantifas]

i also just wanna say … poor people will always have more reason to spend their money on things that are socially considered frivolous compared to the wealthy.

rich people don’t need a 7th yacht to make themselves happy but like … a poor person struggling under crushing poverty buying something that makes them happy is always a more justifiable expense.

why are we pretending rich people need 90% of the shit they waste their money on and instead focusing in on poor people in rare instances of buying expensive things for themselves.

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

My sister takes a stand

[frikiskrew]

[dorites-deactivated20241117]

that scene in the second Harry Potter where Harry has no bones in his arm is probably the most disgusting use of cgi

[moscowdiscow-deactivated2017011]

that wasnt cgi they literally removed daniel radcliffes bones for that scene

[dorites-deactivated20241117]

I hope he got them back

[moscowdiscow-deactivated2017011]

they didnt have the budget to put them back in so for the rest of the movies in the franchise they used cgi to make it look like they did

[folkremedies]

harry potter starts a youtube channel and all of his videos are called like:  

“STORY TIME: I WAS A TEENAGE CHOSEN ONE”

 “BABYSITTING MY FRIEND’S WEIRD DEAD HORSE (INVISIBLE)” 

“THERE ARE DARK WIZARDS TRYING TO KILL ME BUT ONLY THREE PEOPLE KNOW ABOUT MY HOUSE”

[folkremedies]

would like to add to this post and say that harry is uploading these videos to standard muggle youtube. people see this kind of scruffy, obviously Fucked Up kid rambling nonsense into his deskptop camera and just think he is really really good at shitposting

[folkremedies]

Harry, *filming himself with one hand, throwing raw meat at a seemingly empty space with the other*: “So anyways, you guys probably can’t see him through the camera lens but this weird fuck belongs to my best friend Luna who can’t actually take care of him right now because she’s out riding drag- er, um she’s on vacation in Romania so I have to do it. Um, the only reason I can see him is because I watched my close friend get murdered by an evil wizard when I was fourteen which, by the way, was around the same time I started to think I might be gay. Anyone else?”

Teens on tumblr who have no idea he’s being completely serious: “This is the only man alive who truly Gets me.”