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@bitxhin
Doctor: Do you want the good news first, or the bad news?
Man: Good news first please, doc!
Doctor: We’re naming a disease after you
Why is this funny
octopus kites [src]
Where can I get one of these?
I don’t remember this scene from the matrix
“Strange tradition from the forgotten rural years.” Bees attend keeper’s funeral, 1956.
always reblog bees
important bee news
@cinensis
Wow. Animals truly are something else.
Wow.
A Twitter bot posted this and I just
lmao people have donated over $3500 to a gofundme to “protect Betty White from 2016”…….like the person who started it must literally just be
it’s now over $5000 i can’t believe……..
Ok, I’ll bite. What’s capitalism?
capitalism is the generally ritualistic practice of eating the flesh of one’s own species
No, that’s cannibalism. Capitalism is the scientific name of the plant you smoke when you want to relax
No, that’s cannabis. Capitalism is an electronic handheld device that’s used for doing math.
No that’s a calculator. Capitalism is the eastern European mountain range mostly in Romania.
No, that’s the Caucasus. Capitalism is a fat worm that becomes a butterfly.
No that’s a caterpillar. Capitalism is when you have your testicles removed.
No that’s castration. Capitalism is when something truly terrible happens and everyone stands around saying that it was probably the will of God and there’s nothing to be done about it since that system works.
No, that’s a catastrophe. Capitalism is a behavioral syndrome marked by an inability to move normally. The word “Capitalistic” is also often used in casual language to refer to a person who doesn’t appear to be responding to any stimuli from the outside world.
No, that’s catatonic. Capitalism is a religion led by a man in a funny hat who trades in souls.
No, that’s Catholicism. Capitalism is another name for the governor of a castle.
That’s a constable. Capitalism is what you feel when someone gets what’s coming to them or falls by their intrinsic character flaws. It’s a kind of emotional release.
No, that’s catharsis. Capitalism is a gradually occurring opacity of the lens of the eye that eventually causes blindness.
VAN EYCK
I lost it at the end.
Okay, I had to check out the Van Eyck thing. I was a bit in denial because, come on, every single person can’t look like President Putin!
There are no words to describe how wrong I was.
Van Eyck also signed his name in ways that loosely translated to “Eyck was here.”
Wilkes-Barre Times Leader, Pennsylvania, October 8, 1942
the fact that lights don’t start flickering ominously and short-circuiting whenever i’m upset is maximally unsexy and not at all excellent if you ask me
Dissolve milk powder with more milk to create Ultra Milk
Dissolve instant coffee with more coffee to create Ultra Coffee
Put Ultra Milk in your Ultra Coffee.
Together they form a complete goatee