Cheers
To you apostates, heretics, and black sheep.
Y’all are stronger than you think.
I remember thinking right in the middle of my deconversion that life was unbearable. I wanted to die. The world was spinning, there was pressure from all sides. It was almost unbearable. I slept so much. And I constantly wondered if I would ever feel normal again.
And honestly? Life is fucking hard. But it is nothing, nothing, like it was during deconversion.
I can look back on my life and see progress in so many areas. And yeah, sometimes the world spins again, but it isn’t perpetual.
It is okay. I can make it. You can make it.
The self doubt is still around but it isn’t screaming.
The wrongful guilt rears it’s head, but it isn’t all consuming.
It’s up and down and messy. But it’s better. That nightmare deconversion isn’t permanent.
Love y’alll. Good luck. 🍀🖤
I wrote this a year or two ago and I stand by it. Things continue getting better.
I am so much happier and healthier now doing the hard work in therapy, letting myself be who I am, and unlearning unhelpful thought patterns. It’s not easy, but it isn’t bad. It’s so worth it.
