Protect Lucy Westenra at all costs

[fostersffff]

Can you tell this dub was recorded in South Carolina, and in 1995?

[sigmaufo]

Allegedly, the Japanese producers enjoyed the English dub so much (especially of Natsumi), that when they recorded the TV series, they showed the English OVA dub to the Japanese actors in order to inspire their acting.

Coastal Carolina didn’t make many English dubs, but those they did make are a treat. Besides You’re Under Arrest, I also enjoy Shinesman and Elf Princess Rane. And many of the same personnel later reformed as another company and did the dub of Miami Guns.

[prokopetz]

I can’t believe I never realised before this exact moment that the very specific vocal characterisation that’s indelibly burned into the brains of an entire generation of English-speaking nerds as the 90s Anime Dub Voice™ is literally just a Carolina accent.

[thebrightestwitchofherage]

A brief History of Mizrahi Jews in Arabic countries and Their expulsion

A\N: While I am an Ashkenazi Jew, I have done A LOT of research, and have both Iraqi friends and relatives to corroborate this with. Also, I'm petty - an Iraqi user who comments regularly on my posts seems to forget about his own country's Jewish history... Well, I hope he forgot instead of the more likely reality: It seems like Arabic people nowadays aren't aware of Jewish history in their countries since they either killed to expelled them all. Thus is born the constant argument that all Jews originated in Europe and are merely settlers in the Middle East.

I realized that what may be obvious to me won't be obvious to others since I'm a history nerd who grew up in Israel with plenty of rich archeological evidence and resources surrounding me. I'm happy to make these posts in hopes of educating others and contributing my part to ending antisemitism and prejudice. ___________________

You might have seen the following picture in one of my previous posts:

It is said that a picture is worth a thousand words. Unfortunately, in this case, it concludes hundreds of years of discrimination, violence, and exile for Mizrahi Jews. * It is important to note that numbers are slightly varied between sources, but the meaning is clear.

In a nutshell- all throughout history, the fate of Jewish people in countries where they weren't the religious majority was the same:

Discriminatory laws, blood libels, being blamed for disasters > violence & murder > Pogroms * > and eventually- exile or mass murder AKA ethnic cleansing \ genocide.

Pogrom-  the term refers to violent attacks by local non-Jewish populations on Jews in the Russian Empire and in other countries.

Every Jewish community has its own Pogrom. While my side of the family might immediately think of the Kristallnacht or persecution & pogroms in Hungary, it is different for Jews from different backgrounds. You can read about a few cases of forced conversion to Islam here.

A brief History of the land of Israel

The land of Israel has always been considered a strategic passageway, and so many empires throughout history have conquered it:

* I simply cannot accurately write 3000+ years of Jewish history in the land of Israel. I found that this video summarizes it perfectly.

Exile from the land of Israel

Jews were exiled from the land of Israel numerous times since the Assyrian empire conquered Israel in 732 BCE, to what we call "the diaspora" גולה. It was not by choice and we were persecuted everywhere we went.

Jews were not allowed to legally return to Israel until 1948 when the British mandate over the land of Israel ended and Israel was formed. Yes, even during the Holocaust.

The Jewish answer to exile - Aliyah עליה There have been 5 waves of illegal immigration from all over the world to the land of Israel before 1948, recorded in modern times.

Chart taken from Wikipedia (their chart was the best I could find in English)

Forced Conversion

Whether in conquered Israel or in exile, Jews were often forced to convert to either Christianity or Islam. The choice was between conversion or death.

*You can read more about some of the forced conversion of Jews during history here and here.

First Case study- The last jew of Peki'in, Margalit Zinati

Peki'in is an ancient village in the upper Galilee, Northern Israel. Nowadays, its population is mostly Druze.

Peki'in has had a Jewish presence since the Second Temple period, until Arab riots in the 1930s*. Meet the remaining member of the Zinatis, the only family who returned. (aish.com)

*Read more on the Arab riots of the 1930s here and here. Margalit is currently the last Jew living in the village of Peki'in . She is the last direct descendent of the Zinati Cohen family. The Zinati family's origins are dated back to the Second Temple era. The former Jewish community of Peki'in maintained a presence there since the Second Temple period (516 BCE – 70 CE). That is when the polytheistic Persian Empire conquered the land of Israel. For reference- that was approximately 500 years before Jesus was even born! "During which the Second Temple stood in the city of Jerusalem. It began with the return to Zion and subsequent reconstruction of the Temple in Jerusalem, and ended with the First Jewish–Roman War and the Roman siege of Jerusalem." (Wikipedia)

As an adult, Margalit chose to not marry so she could stay in Peki'in and continue her family's Jewish legacy in Peki'in. She later became in charge of the ancient synagogue in the village and turned her basement into a visiting center \ museum of Jewish history in Peki'in- "House of Zinati". in 2018, she lit up a torch as part of Israel's 70th Independence Day Torch lighting ceremony (which is considered an honor given to influential and trailblazing people).

-Margalit Zinati pictured in the Peki'in Synagogue yard, 2016 Picture taken from Wikipedia, uploaded by Deror Avi.

Second Case study - Iraqi Jews (Babylonian Jews \ יְהוּדִים בָּבְלִים)

Iraqi Jews are one of the oldest documented Jewish communities living in the Middle East. It is estimated that they originated around 600 BC.ת

The Farhud الفرهود הפרהוד

Unfortunately, Iraqi Jewish history ended in the same pattern I've described earlier. The Farhud was the violent mass dispossession against the Jewish population of Baghdad, Iraq between 1-2 June 1941. was the pogrom or the "violent dispossession" that was carried out against the Jewish population of Baghdad, Iraq, on 1–2 June 1941, It immediately followed the British victory in the Anglo-Iraqi War.

Background for the Farhud:

WW2- At the time, many Arabic countries in the Middle East agreed with Nazi ideology.

History of violence towards Jews.

The Anglo-Iraqi War (2–31 May 1941) - caused rising tension, and as usual, it was turned on the Jews.

personal family ties to the Farhud My relative was born in 1939 in Iraq, to a big upper-class Jewish family. Unfortunately, the mass exile of Jews in the 1950s didn't skip her family: she was stripped of her belongings and exiled to Israel along with her family. In the 1950s there were approximately 140,000 Iraqi Jews. As of 2021, there are only 4 left.

----------------- Please feel free to add anything I missed in the notes. And as usual - remember I am a human being. If you cuss or harass me, I will block and report you.

______________

Online Sources: * https://www.israelhayom.co.il/article/865383 - Hebrew article, Title means "Sad ending to a magnificent history: Only 4 Jews left in Iraq".

What was the Farhud https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Farhud

History of the Jewish community in Baghdad https://cojs.org/the_jewish_community_in_baghdad_in_the_eighteenth_century-_zvi_yehuda-_nehardea-_babylonian_jewry_heritage_center-_2003/

What are Pogroms?https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/pogroms?gclid=Cj0KCQiAkeSsBhDUARIsAK3tiedM7DuwIaSQX-kRxvXTgCDxN6-zqeo_DNNFgyanSYGyGOhwu_0vfrkaAg6REALw_wcB

The last Jew of Peki'in, Margalit Zinati https://aish.com/the-last-jew-of-pekiin/

Arab riots of 1930s- https://www.gov.il/en/Departments/General/ben_zvi_30 https://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/the-1936-arab-riots

Israel's history from ancient times & timeline : https://www.travelingisrael.com/timeline-land-israel/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?app=desktop&v=iiUIWnU-Ofk

Second Temple era - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Second_Temple_period

Forced conversion of Jews across history- https://www.jstor.org/stable/j.ctt18mvnct.7?seq=4

https://academic.oup.com/book/32113/chapter-abstract/268043723?redirectedFrom=fulltext

[psychologeek]

Adding to it the Orphans' Decree in Yemen (aka for CENTURIES, underage orphans were taken from their families and forced to convert to Islam.) The only way out was escaping (for example, to Eretz Yisrael) or getting married (sometimes as young as 3 yo), which meant being considered legally adult.

*to be clear, it does NOT mean having sex. My great-grandma was married at 15 yo, but went to live with her husband at about 17 yo, after she "became a woman" (aka got her period).

And the way jews weren't allowed to own land (which had a HUGE impect, consider 80% of the population lived in small villages.)

[atundratoadstool]

A cool thing about Frankenstein’s nested narrative structure is that the innermost narrative box contains Safie and the outermost box contains Margaret. The giant, sprawling story of so many self-absorbed, dramatic, yearning men is bookended by a woman trying to communicate and a woman who may or may not be trying to listen, and the idea that this whole mess can be read as a game of telephone between two almost entirely voiceless female characters is super compelling.

[walkingshcdow-a]

I’d like to add that when there is a female voice, such as with Elizabeth’s letters and testimony at Justine’s trial and Justine’s profession to Elizabeth and Victor, are also very nested within the narrative. The only time we are given female voices, we are given them so deeply through the lens of the male gaze that their characterization is deeply colored by Victor’s (and then Walton’s) opinions of them. 

As Victor paints his dead wife as a saint, the woman reading of her, Margaret, is left to imagine who Elizabeth Lavenza is when not the object of Victor’s desire. Who is this woman when she isn’t penning letters? Some inferences I’ve made include that Elizabeth, as the woman of the house, was left to raise Ernest and William since she was sixteen. Though Justine was their governess, she was as close to a mother as they had. She ran the Frankenstein household and, until Victor made the Creature and upended his family’s peace, things ran smoothly, even though Elizabeth suffered the same griefs as Victor - perhaps more, depending on which version of the story you’re reading (1818 vs. 1831). 

The same is true of Justine. We see her through not only Victor’s eyes, but Elizabeth’s. Elizabeth’s letter paints Justine as a victim - perhaps even a martyr - long before she truly becomes one. Justine never talks of her past tragedies herself and even if she did, her voice would still be filtered through Victor’s, which is then filtered through Walton’s. When Justine speaks for herself, again, we have the opinions of the male narrators filtering her words.

This says a lot about how Victor (and Walton) see women. If Victor were to report about the flaws of the women he loved, they would not have a tragic, fairytale quality to them, even though Victor surely knows the sins, secrets, and flaws of both Justine and especially Elizabeth. He grew up alongside them. If he knows their damning qualities, his omission of them not only garners the readers’ sympathy, but gives an incomplete and romanticized picture of both women. It’s almost as if Victor doesn’t want to believe that anything either woman did was even mildly reprehensible. Whether that’s to soothe his own soul (likely) that they did not deserve their fates, whether that’s to convince Walton that they did not deserve their fates, whether that’s to condemn himself for bringing tragedy on the undeserving (possible), or whether that’s because he’s genuinely blocked out any negativity surrounding Elizabeth and/or Justine as people in order to cope with the trauma, it’s hard to say. What it does do is place these women so far above reproach that they seem more like angels than people. 

On a meta-textual level, this way of depicting women says a lot about how men view women and what kind of women are considered “good”. If Victor dared to focus on negative aspects of Elizabeth or Justine, they might have been viewed (either by Walton or by the audience) as “bad” women, who perhaps deserved to be killed. It creates a Madonna/whore dichotomy without even depicting any whores. It’s smart writing - of course it is. But I call it “smart writing” because it takes a trope that has dominated Western fiction for centuries (and continued/continues to dominate Western fiction) and upends it. If all the women are Madonnas, regardless of faults, none of them deserve the violence men and monsters commit against them. 

However smart that writing must be to a 21st century reader, one can only imagine what it must have been like to be Margaret Sackville, reading her brother’s letters about these unimpeachable women - Elizabeth, Justine, Safie, Agatha, Caroline - and wondering just how unauthorized Victor Frankenstein is to tell their stories and how incomplete his understanding of them is. 

[luanna801]

This is some fantastic commentary, but I do want to add that Victor pretty much portrays his father, Clerval, William, and even someone like M. Waldman as absolutely flawless angels, too. The only person close to him who’s allowed even the slightest hint of a flaw is Ernest, and that’s only because Elizabeth mentions in a letter that he “never had [Victor’s] powers of application” and she’s afraid he’ll “become an idler”. (Perhaps not coincidentally, Victor barely ever mentions Ernest, so we never actually get to see this supposed flaw in action.) 

The Creature also starts off portraying Felix and De Lacey as absolute paragons of virtue, and even though he ultimately ends up condemning Felix for attacking him (“Why do you not hate Felix, who drove his friend from his door with contumely?”), it’s more in the context of condemning humanity as a whole than really portraying it as a flaw unique to Felix. I’d argue the only characters in the book who are really allowed much in the way of moral complexity at all are Victor and the Creature themselves.

I get the feeling that’s partly because Victor is a rather black-and-white person - he seems to see people as either wholly good or wholly bad, which is why I think he struggles to sympathize with the Creature and acknowledge his own part in making him what he became. I also think in the cases of his parents, Justine, Elizabeth, William and Clerval, he’s very likely turned them into martyrs in his mind to deal with the grief of losing them.

That isn’t to say I’m arguing that his perspective is sexist, because it definitely is and I think that affects how he sees all of the women in his life. But I also think he has a strong tendency towards putting people in black-and-white moral categories and idealizing the people he loves, which isn’t limited to the women in the novel.

[theseerasures]

I would like to hear the story of how you slept under the christmas tree

so i immigrated to the US at age 9, right, and one of the first things my family did was join the local Chinese church. as far as the whole “figuring out how to do things so we no longer have to live in the back shed of Uncle Joe’s* Magic Emporium” thing goes, it’s a pretty sound strategy! now we had people to teach my dad how to drive and give us old furniture and say “hey, Seattle is pretty rainy maybe you should rent an apartment-like space before either a) the shed roof caves in b) your daughter with the famously delicate constitution falls dramatically ill from a strain of black mold or possibly herpes”

*is not my uncle, that’s what his store was called. he sold magic gadgets and my dad knew him because???? possibly in a past life they ran a meth empire in Albuquerque, who knows

ANYWAY. thanks to the church i did not fall dramatically ill from black mold or possibly herpes, but there was an unforeseen factor in joining a Christian church, which was that they? were pretty hardcore? about Jesus?**

**in a nice “we build houses for the homeless” way, not in…the other way

given that we’d just immigrated and that China’s religious policy is worshiping Mao’s preserved corpse ehhhhh…let’s call it “freedom of atheism,” my family was decidedly not hardcore about Jesus. my parents mostly took the bemused “i guess Jesus is okay since he indirectly led to us living in a place suited for human habitation” route, but i

was

DISGUSTED.

i was the first kid in my class to get her red scarf, okay, and when we sang the national anthem and saluted the flag every morning i fucking meant what i was singing. we almost didn’t come to America; my dad had more lucrative job offers in Germany and Belgium, but i put my foot down because everyone knows Europe is full of gross imperialists Dad, GOSH, and the Americans helped us fight off the Japanese.

so seeing all these fellow Chinese believing in THE CAPITALIST GOD was basically the worst thing to ever happen to my delicate psyche. my parents’ tacit approval was even worse: DID PATRIOTISM AND COMMUNISM MEAN NOTHING TO THEM? DIDN’T THEY KNOW THAT DOING NOTHING AGAINST OPPRESSION MADE THEM OPPRESSORS THEMSELVES??

clearly something needed to be done.

so because the church was pretty hardcore about Jesus, it was understandably also hardcore about Christmas. big party, massive intricately decorated REAL TREE, sleepover for the kids with presents in the morning—you name it. everyone was going to be there.

WHAT A GREAT OPPORTUNITY TO PROVE TO EVERYONE HOW WRONG THEY ARE ABOUT JESUS.

my plan:

sleep UNDER the giant real Christmas tree: y’know, the one with real pointy needles reaching all the way down to the base? that sheds? with lots of pokey tinsel?

catch Jesus in the act of depositing presents***: look. i’d seen like, ALL of Scooby Doo by this point. i knew Jesus was probably a real person, just not the Son of God.

subdue Jesus so he’s still around when everyone else wakes up: CLEARLY VERY FEASIBLE, given that Jesus was a heavyset white dude who used superhuman agility and strength to deliver presents around the world overnight and possibly had reindeer minions and i weighed 70 pounds at most while sopping wet.

(who is Santa Claus?? who cares)

????

EVERYONE MAGICALLY BECOMES AN ATHEIST AGAIN, AMERICA BECOMES A COMMUNIST STATE

***even if i didn’t believe in him, why was i slavishly devoted stopping a highly altruistic man who gave? people? presents? did i hate joy????

sure enough, at around 3 in the morning i heard soft boots approaching the tree. i reached out and snatched one of the Ankles of Jesus

—whereupon Youth Pastor Liao screamed “OH MY LORD” and kicked me in the face.

and THAT, dear friends, is how i spent my first Christmas in America with a concussion.

[waffleguppies]

I think this is the greatest Christmas story ever told

[pilgrimkitty]

This is the most beautiful story I’ve ever read.

[bluepeachllamazonk]

Can't finish this book still can't stop thinking about it

[lxgentlefolkcomic]

What's everyone's weapon of choice?

[bluepeachllamazonk]

It got worse

[bluepeachllamazonk]

Good heavens! The yeomanry troops who brutally murder everyone of the people at Mowbray Castle, including Morley probably, but also a lot of other striking workers, are Charles' troops

[bluepeachllamazonk]

In case anyone who who intends to read Sybil (you should) comes across this it's very spoilery.

I'm not usually into love stories and Morley's unrequited love absolutely isn't healthy but damn does it make him interesting.

Morley is this calm, serious man who feels deeply the plight of the working class and who is utterly morally upstanding: a temperance man and through the entire book a man who is of an absolute conviction of nonviolence, preferring "moral force".

But the way he loves Sybil destroys him. His only two moments of despair and emotional outbreaks are caused by that; the first one in a situation where he has come prepared to use her father's hour of exigency to force an answer to his love from her, which he's kept to himself for years, and with him reacting to her plight and tears but in the worst possible ways, always by pressing her even more. The moment he establishes himself as pretty terrible and has you swaying from oh that's inconsiderate to that's pretty terrible to aw what a good lad still helping her to absolutely horrified.

And now, after the reader worried for what he may use the knowledge he has of the papers her family needs so much, because his initial reaction was very sus, he does it, he follows Hatton's plan, gets the striking workers to break into the De Mowbray's castle, bears all the destruction he's always hated, and when he's surrounded only gives Mik the papers to flee with them and draws his pistol, intending to try and make it but most likely dying. In that situation he's also so desperate to find those papers, and so elated when he does, but this time, instead of being horribly selfish, his love for her makes him unhealthily selfless, causing him to forsake absolutely everything for her, his morals and life

[bluepeachllamazonk]

Not me crying over an almost 200 year old book

[see-arcane]

I feel like..jonathan begged jack to keep a record of that day instead of himself partially because he kept tearing and erasing the drafts that said way too much, like "i have read how much poor lucy writhed in pain and not all the powers of heaven or hell shall make me raise my hand on her nor will i let anyone, oh how heroic of you all to kneel o noble men damn your duty and damn you too" to shreds and at this rate they'd run out of ink and paper. probably scratched out curses and dropped tears made the entries illegible.

If he ever did try to put pen to paper, I imagine he'd never manage to scribble anything, angry or otherwise. Remember, even at his worst moments in Castle Dracula, he was very careful with his pages, never writing anything unless he could trust himself to muster something. He had some pretty lengthy writing droughts. Sometimes his mind just couldn't wrap around the act.

That said, I'm sure he tapped Jack to do the diary-keeping explicitly because if he did get himself into writing mode, the only coherent thing on the page would be rage at himself, plus a dozen pages of wrath at Dracula. Yes, Mina was left vulnerable because he followed their lead--but he agreed to it. He helped Dracula make his move from the castle in the first place. He can no more bring himself to blame the others for the October 3rd situation than he can blame them for the dead Demeter crew or Lucy herself.

The only point I think he'd turn venomous on is the notion of the mercy-killing...but as we saw, any of that was kept carefully silent on paper and in-person. For the obvious reasons.

[faithful-grigori]

”#remember Jonathan is in a hell of a state when it comes to self-loathing/self-blaming in this situation, #he's the one who allowed Dracula to get to England in the first place, #he knows the others are good guys, #he likely sees himself as far more 'blasphemous' in his vampiric worst case scenario thoughts with Mina than anything, #they are the Classic Heroes (c) while he is--to his mind--a pariah on the edge of redemption or else a man already damned, #for what far greater sins he's willing to do for love”

[bluepeachllamazonk]

George "a family can live very well on 7 shillings a-week" Egremont

[bluepeachllamazonk]

I only have 7 chapters of Sybil left and that means I'm unable to continue reading this book because i dont want it to end

[animate-mush]

So obviously Jack and Art married each other

But for the sake of fun, let's say their wives are real and blurred out for copyright reasons. Can we matchmake them adequately out of other contemporary sources?

Anyway I gotta re-read but right now I think maybe Jack might have married Irene Adler.

[neofooturism]

this shit fucked me up

[sunspotpony]

This is why I hate the like, casual ha ha aren’t men awful jokes that people like to casually throw around.

Like, men are victims of the patriarchy too, and loneliness and isolation is what brings out the worst in people.

I’m not saying you have to be nice to or defend wretched men, but don’t treat them as wretched just because they are men. Treat them as wretched because they are wretched.

[argonauticae]

im putting together a couple of scottish folk mixes bc that’s what i do and im honestly curious if anyone in my country has ever been unequivocally happy about anything ever

[argonauticae]

scottish trad music genres:

Everyone I Love Is Dead

The English Have Stolen All My Sheep

You Want To Be My Boyfriend? First You Must Answer These Riddles Three

The Protestants Have Stolen All My Sheep

I Love You A Lot But You’ve Left Me And It’s Raining [fiddle solo]

The Sea Is Treacherous, Just Like The English

One Time Bonnie Prince Charlie Punched Me In The Face And It Was Awesome

The Fairies Have Stolen All My Sheep

[plaidadder]

We have of course the traditional Irish music genres to go with them:

* Everyone I Love Is An Allegorical Representation of Ireland

* The English Stole My Farm And Put Sheep On It

* You Were My Boyfriend But Now You Won’t Even Come To The Window To Look Upon Me And Our Dead Infant Child (In The Rain)

* Whack Fol Too La Roo Umptytiddly Good They’ve Stopped Listening Now Let’s Talk About Revolution

* Something In Irish, I Think It’s About Fairies, Or Maybe A Cow

[jean-paul-fartre]

oooo can I add to this? don’t forget Appalachian folk balladry, the American cousin of Scottish and Irish traditional music and just as uplifting as its Anglo-Saxon highland forbears!!!

genres include:

I Left Everyone I Love Back Home In The Holler To Be With This Guy Who Doesn’t Wear Shoes Or Have Teeth But He Plays A Mean Jug

The English Told Us Not To Move West Yet, We Ignored Them, My Entire Family Was Killed

You Were My Boyfriend But You Tied A Sack Of Rocks To My Petticoats And Threw Me In The Creek (And My Baby Too)

Mama Loves All 14 Of Us A Lot But She’s Weary Of Our Shit And Now She’s Dyin’ (Gather Round)

The McCleans Stole A Firewood Log From Our Pile So We Won’t Rest Until The Last Of Their Male Kin Is Laid In The Cold Ground

We Knew The River Would Rise But We Still Didn’t Fix The Levee 

The River Rose, The Levee Broke, Everyone Died, It Was Just As We Reckoned (dulcimer twang-a-lang) 

When The Rebels Come A-Marchin’ I’m A Southern Man And I Feed Their Horses My Best, When The Yankees Come A-Marchin’ I’m A Northern Man And I Feed Their Horses What The Rebels Left

The Tennessee Valley Authority Killed All My Sheep Somehow

[shredsandpatches]

Don’t forget that old standby “The Mine Collapsed and Everyone Died”!

I think someone needs to put in a word for the English folk tradition though:

I Met a Girl and We Went Hunting (It Was a Metaphor for Sex)

I Met a Girl and We Caught Some Birds (It Was a Metaphor for Sex)

I Met a Girl and We Found Her Lost Pet (It Was a Metaphor for Sex)

I Met a Girl By Staying At Her Parents’ House and She Made My Bed (It Was an Especially Thinly-Veiled Metaphor for Sex)

I Am a Girl and I Regret Engaging In Metaphors for Sex Because Now I’m Pregnant

I Met a Girl and Bribed Her Into Sex But She Stole My Horse and Ran Away With It

I Met a Girl At an Inn and We Had Non-Metaphorical Sex But She Stole My Stuff The Next Morning and Now I Have Syphilis

Your Fiance Died Either at Trafalgar or Waterloo, Let’s Get Married, I’m Glad You Said No Because I’m Really Him In Disguise

Lord Nelson Sure Was Awesome

The Press-Gang Dragged Off All the Important Men in My Life (And Now They Are Dead)

Farm Laborers Are The Salt of the Earth And Are Never Grindingly Poor

Begging Is a Completely Viable Career Option With Flexible Hours and Unlimited Access to Alcohol

[infinite-magical-recipes]

behold mongolian folk music genres

I Went Out Riding and Noticed Mongolia

We Fought a Bunch of Guys (On Horseback)

Witness My Many Ungulates

(While On a Horse) I Met a Hot Girl Who Reminded Me of a Plant

On Three, Say What That Terrain Feature Looks Like to You (One, Two, Three, A Horse)

Witness My Many Ancestors’ Many Ungulates

I Also Enjoy Heavy Metal, Especially If It’s Made of Horseshoes

Oooorrrrweeeeuuurrrreeeeuuuuwwwwwrrrrrrrr (Is Tuvan for “Horse”)

You Might Not Know This About Me, But I Own a Horse

[scarlettohairdye]

THE MONGOLIAN FOLK SONGS MADE IT BETTER.

[churakaagii]

now with more okinawan!

We Must Plant the Crops, Let’s Get Drunk! 

We Must Harvest the Crops, Let’s Get Drunk!

There’s No Crops Right Now, Let’s Get Drunk!

Sex On the Beach Is Awesome, War Is Bad

There Are Ghosts in the Trees

The Japanese Exploit Us (And the Americans Do Too)

I Love the Sea, This Island Is Beautiful, War Is Still Bad

Hey, There’s an Old Man, Let’s Get Drunk!

Respect Your Parents Or You Will Be Lost at Sea Forever

[damaskrosechicago]

As the daughter of a folksinger and spouse of a folklorist, I love this SO MUCH.  Here’s some from the sub-sub-genre of French folk songs of the Midwest…

I Am A Brawny-Armed Lumberjack Who Loves a Town Girl, Oh No!

Oh Fuck, I Slept With a Fur Trapper, What Shall I Tell Maman?

Hauling Logs, Rolling Logs, Driving Logs, All Day, What Ho!

Like Hell You’re Marrying That Good for Nothing Bambocheur!

Fetch My Gold Ring That Fell Into the Sea!  Now!

I Met A Sailor While A-Strolling, And Now We Are In Love!

I Want to Kiss the Sailor I Met A-Strolling, But I’m Afraid My Father Will Find Out!

Oh Fuck, I Kissed the Sailor I Met A-Strolling And Now We Are Doomed!

[johnnygreyart]

Some Italian Folk Music Genres

A Spider Has Bitten Me And If I Do Not Dance I Will Die, Alas

I Am A Very Fancy Man With A Very Fancy Hat

The Cable Car Is A Thinly-Veiled Metaphor For Your Feminine Torture, O Woman

Rome Is The Very Best Place And Every Other Place Is Just Awful

I Love You, But You Are Married

I Love You, But You Are Fickle (Why Did You Dance With The Baker’s Son, Thou Vixen?)

I Love You, But You Left Me All Alone On This Romantic Wind-Swept Hillside, Which Is Actually Very Pretty, But Not As Pretty As You, Foul Temptress

Rome Is Still The Best Place And Every Other Place Can Go Right To Hell

Seriously Once You Have Been To Rome You Will Just Be Sick At The Thought Of Being Anywhere Else, You Will Pine Away And Die

I Love You, But You Are Dead (Or Maybe You Just Went To Live In A Slightly Prettier Place)

Rome, Rome, O Rome, Ah Rome, Rome Rome Rome, Have I Mentioned That I Love Rome?

Venetian Special Genres:

Women Are Like The Ocean: Salty And Full Of Drowned Sailors

Women Are Like The Ocean: I Cannot Figure Them Out At All

I Saw You One Time At A Party And I Have Designs Upon Your Feminine Virtue

I Love You, But You Are Married To The Ocean (For Some Reason)

[snackonomics]

I thought I would add some Dutch ones, because I saw no one had added any: - That Girl Is A Prostitute (But At Least She Goes To Church)

- That Incompetent Sailor Is Actually A Girl, But She Will Have Sex With You If You Don’t Kick Her Off The Boat

- Someone Of Any Occupation Is Doing Something, But Unfortunately They Are Now Dead

- Fuck You Spain (Haha, We Sunk Your Boat And Stole Your Silver)

- Fuck You England

- We Might Be Small, But We Will Fight You

- Life Isn’t So Bad, If You Just Go Outside

- Fuck You Winter

- Look At That Guy (Wild Racism)

- We Like Going To Other Countries (More Wild Racism)

- Drinking Is Fun

- Drinking Makes Me Long For Sea

- God Is My Dad

- My Province Is Great And Full Of Nature

[bluepeachllamazonk]

TIL that Sir Robert Peel got the nickname "Orange Peel" because of his stance on catholic emancipation