disabled futurist dreaming a life worth living

29, she/it/they, transmasc dyke

[2pen2wildfire]

parents are allowed to straight-up torture their kids with zero consequences. they can withhold food and water, lock you out of shelter, confiscate your belongings, bar you from human contact, attack and harm you and exert complete control over your physical appearance. and this is just the norm. if you speak out against it you're seen as a delinquent or a predator. even otherwise progressive people get uncomfortable with the idea of dismantling the nuclear family unit because they still see it as the best way to keep kids safe when that simply couldn't be further from the truth. it's evil.

[boba-t-butch]

my therapist observed that i'm the kind of person who holds on until i can't hold on any more. i cling and try to make things work until there is no possible way forward. my previous breakups, i would cry, huge heaving sobs in the aftermath. but then id be overcome by a sense of relief and be able to move on. i usually wouldn't cry after the initial breakup.

this is my first time being broken up with. in a lot of ways, this is the most loving breakup i've been through. i really do recognize that there were things that weren't working. it just feels weird to let go without trying for longer.

like i've been in dynamics where the relationship had soured and we'd started being cruel to one another. this one feels like even the ending was gentle. and i can't stop crying, day after day, little reminders of her absence, and im crying again.

told my therapist it's hard to have to switch between realities, where in some ways i already thought of her as my wife, and now we're nothing at all. my therapist asked if i could think in shades of gray, imagine all the infinite other ways we could be meaningful to each other.

it's hard within no contact. and i have to give it time. what we can be to each other has to include grieving what we were.

[boba-t-butch]

crying at work after noticing another little piece of my relationship has been erased

[boba-t-butch]

can't believe this was just yesterday..... crying again today

[loredwy]

I cant believe this tweet is how I find out

[would-you-punt-them]

now all the things you guys have told me about american high schools are starting to make sense

[jeaninelatragedia]

holy shit.

[frustratedasatruar]

You're not really supposed to say it this way, because its considered crass, but here in the US children are culturally and legally considered essentially the property of their parents.

Note that its considered more crass to point this out than it is to treat children as property in the first place.

[boba-t-butch]

crying at work after noticing another little piece of my relationship has been erased

[emocat4eva]

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

The levels of traditional Chinese architecture by 扇子有画

[qin-shi-huang-di]

I am always saying this!

[teeth-offical]

HOW DOES ONE "ACCIDENTALLY" BECOME EMPEROR?

[qin-shi-huang-di]

BY BEING A DISGUSTING TRAITOR WHO LETS HIS CONVICTS ESCAPE, AND INSTEAD OF SUBMITTING TO EXECUTION LIKE A GOOD QIN DYNASTY CITIZEN, HE DECIDES TO FREE THE REST, AND LEAD THEM IN A REBELLION AGAINST THE STATE!!!!

this is a call out post for @emperor-gaozu-of-han!!! liu bang is nothing but a traitorous PEASANT who is totally UNQUALIFIED for the role of EMPEROR. he might have hoodwinked the uneducated masses with his tax breaks, exemptions of corvée labour, making peace with the xiongnu, and founding China's first gold age ect ect but I expect my LOYAL MINISTERS to know better!

[emperor-gaozu-of-han]

um☝️I also have the bisexual swag

[qin-shi-huang-di]

DELETE YOUR BLOG

[manicpixienitemaregirl]

Idk who OP is but yeah

[boba-t-butch]

as someone who grew up with parents that were both abusive and insane, i've had to put a lot of intentional effort into decoupling abuse and insanity. i've spent a lot of my life terrified of losing my mind. engaging with Disability Justice and Mad Pride has helped a lot. recognizing that people need to be held accountable for abusive actions regardless of insanity has also been important.

anyways, sometimes i do feel like im losing my mind and im glad it no longer terrifies me so much. i am allowed to go insane, and going insane does not mean i'll be abusive. and if i do abusive things, i can take accountability and repair and recover like anyone else.

[demonprincex]

How Do I Become Less Obedient?

Autistic Advice#12: Noncompliance is a liberating social skill - but it must be developed.

If you’ve never been all that disobedient before, you can and should start really, really small. For example, you can wear the slightly revealing or gloriously trashy-looking garment that makes your mom roll her eyes and sigh despondently every time she sees you put it on. You will feel judged and disapproved of when you put it on, but that is fine. Your goal is to sit with the uncomfortable feelings and continue with your desired behavior anyway.  Saunter down the steps in that highlighter-yellow Garfield crop top with your chest hair flowing over the neckline, and harness as much courage as you can muster. It’s okay if you feel like a beacon of sin. Just keep it moving. Your emotions are not the target here. Your behavior is. You can feel however you are feeling in the moment so long as you keep acting like you’re free.  Do you have a favorite TV show that a partner or roommate vocally hates? Try watching that show around them without apologizing or defensively joining them in mocking the program. At first, you probably won’t be able to enjoy the show while in their presence. You’ll feel self-conscious about everything they find annoying or cringe-inducing about the show, and so focused on their reactions that you can’t relax. That’s okay. Allow those feelings of embarrassment and guilt to exist and pass through you without giving up. In time, you will be able to ignore these reactions more, and enjoy the activity.  You want to see the needle of discomfort moving down just a little, like Link’s body temperature meter in Tears of the Kingdom when he puts on a breathable outfit in a hot climate. You’re not gonna go from roiling hot to frosty cold in an instant. But after a certain point, you won’t be actively in pain anymore. Things are just gonna slowly suck less, bit by bit, until they are finally okay. That’s true of most major life adjustments, I find.  Probably the best way to develop self-advocacy skills while growing in your distress tolerance is simply by telling other people no. Do this without explanation or hedging. Nitpicky aunt wants to hear all about your dating life? “No, I don’t want to talk about that.” Unreliable ex-friend wants you to do them the tiny favor of moving their entire home gymnasium into a new third story walk-up? “No, I’m not available.” Manipulative shift supervisor wants to cajole you into sticking around for another three hours to close? “No.”  As many advice columnists smarter than me have already intoned, “no” is a complete sentence. “No” requires no explanation. “No” is not subject to debate. “No” can be repeated over and over like a broken record if a disrespectful person acts like they can’t hear it. And you can walk away at any time to make your “no” physical and impossible to argue with, when someone has proven they don’t respect your boundaries. 

you can read or listen to the full piece for free here

[demonprincex]

Feeling unsafe is not the same thing as actually being under threat — and if we mask and people-please reflexively, we are likely treating many completely harmless situations of disagreement as if they were mortal threats. It’s important to learn to distinguish between a situation where you have no freedom to speak up, and one where you can live authentically as yourself, and simply get more comfortable with not pleasing everyone. So in any situation where you are free to, try saying “no” and riding out how scary it might feel.  When you first say “no” without explanation or apology, you will feel anxiety. That’s okay. In fact, you should pat yourself on the back for reaching the borders of your comfort zone. It is in this area of unfamiliar, slightly scary, yet possible action that we are able to grow.  You might panic the first time you tell your spouse you’re not cooking dinner every night anymore, and he’ll have to figure out the meal planning himself, or the first time you let a call from a manager go unanswered while you’re off the clock. Great! You are training your body to recognize that nothing bad happens when somebody is a little peeved at you. You’re detaching your sense of safety from another person’s feelings, and tearing apart that enmeshment hurts the way ripping off a band-aid does. 

[demonprincex]

#this article made me finally understand what distress tolerance is and why it would make sense to train it#but i have absolutely no idea how to apply this to my own life#none of the examples would work for me#i don't even mask well anymore i just go on autopilot when asked questions like ''is an 8 am appointment ok'' and say yes 😭

My recommendation for you would be to slow down the process. If your instinct is to automatically say yes, just don't say anything for a second. It's okay if the moment feels awkward. It's not a weird thing to stop for a moment and think. You can even say "I need a moment to think about that." when someone throws you a question or recommends a course of action that you aren't sure how you feel about.

If those options fail, and you still reflexively say yes, you get to change your mind! You can call back and say "I need to change the time for an appointment." You can text your friend and say "Actually, I decided I don't want to see that slasher movie, sorry." You are allowed to speak up after the fact! That is just as legitimate! If you can't access your feelings in the heat of the moment, give yourself some time and space, and then do what you wanna do.

[fageleh]

There are external, structural factors that influence how easily we can say no, of course. It’s far riskier to turn down the demands of a manager who has the power to fire you or a caregiver whom you rely on to stay bathed and fed. And you should never feel ashamed of recognizing such pressures and acting strategically when you’re under them. You’re not a failure for acting with your own self-protection in mind, and giving a potential abuser less ground to mistreat you is sometimes the healthiest boundary-setting that you can do.

[kropotkindersurprise]

July 29 / August 4, 2026 - More Flock surveillance cameras cut down, this time in Seaside, California and Winona, Minnesota. [video]

[boba-t-butch]

to the palestinians messaging me for support, i'm really sorry i can't offer any funds right now. i was fired from my job last year for speaking out for palestine and have continued to participate in fundraising events. however, im currently asking friends for support to pay my own rent while searching for a new job. i am working on improving my financial situation so i can offer more support later on. i am not ignoring your pleas, i just don't have anything to give right now. i'm sorry.

[gazavetters]

🤔 Israel's "Right to Self-Defense"

[remweasel]

The difference in just three years is insane, genuinely went from a beautiful landscape to a barren wasteland...

[gazavetters]

This area is known as Al-Shalihat, not Sheikh Ejlin, and it is located much farther to the north. The image also clearly shows the mosque attached to the Qatari foundation that used to provide humanitarian aid to Gaza.

[penelopepennington]

It's the Royal Academy of Art Young Artist's Summer Show. One of my favourite exhibitions of the year. Like. Not only are the older kids insanely talented, the younger ones' artist statements will just punch you right in the face.

Jeffrey is my cat and he feels like my heart

Click [here] for the full online exhibition

[baybelletrist]

Americans Are Cutting Down Flock Cameras. The Company Calls Them Terrorists.

This month people have been tearing Flock cameras off their poles.

This month people have been tearing Flock cameras off their poles. Perched above public streets, they are birdlike things, weatherproof, and they photograph every passing car and file it in a searchable national database. Somebody cut two of them in half at Washington Avenue and Westcott in Houston, spray-painted the wreckage, and left an American flag on one of them. Police were notified on the morning of the Fourth of July. Somebody severed a camera in Rutherfordton, North Carolina. The police department posted the photograph itself and collected more than twenty thousand comments. “Not all heroes wear capes.” “Give them a medal.” Here is what the cameras do when nobody cuts them down. Cops use them to hunt immigrants and to follow ICE targets across state lines and to find women who ended pregnancies in states where that is a crime and to watch exes and to watch women they want, without a warrant and without a judge. A cop types a reason in a box and the box does not check. A man in Burleson, Texas, told deputies his girlfriend had taken abortion pills. He showed them the photographs, the FedEx envelope, the instructions. Deputies opened a death investigation into a non-viable fetus, and the district attorney told them the state could not charge her, and they searched anyway: 83,345 cameras across 6,809 networks, a month of everywhere she had been. The reason they typed was had an abortion, search for female. The search reached Illinois and Washington, where what she did was legal. They found her in Dallas. She came into the sheriff’s office a week later, and they thought she had come to explain the fetus, and she had come to report that the man who called them had put a gun to her head. A sheriff in Jerome County, Idaho ran his wife’s plate more than seven hundred times in three months. He typed the same reason every time. Test. The attorney general found nothing to charge him with. He retired in April. The Institute for Justice counts at least twenty-two officers who used the system to track people they were romantically interested in, and calls that almost certainly an undercount. And the cameras keep falling.

Become ungovernable.

[brood-me-daddy]

Looks like the ACLU has a guide on how to take action in your community. They've already done a lot of ground work.

Get The Flock Out

Automatic license plate reader (ALPR) companies like Flock Safety are quietly trying to build a nationwide mass surveillance system. If ther

[mikkeneko]

Direct link to the toolkit:

Get The Flock Out Toolkit

[goslinggf]

"girl dinner" "boy kibble" can y'all just eat a meal gender neutrally

[goslinggf]

gender neutrients

[boba-t-butch]

i know it's not specific to hadestown and is part of the industry more broadly. and. i wonder if the popularity of the hadestown proshot and how visibly the stars have been impacted by the exhaustion of performing will create better working conditions.

patrick page as hades literally tore his achilles tendon and that's why he has that big boot and cane during the proshot. he pushed through an injury and went into surgery afterwards.

eva noblezada as eurydice has a scar under her lip because she fainted from exhaustion and her teeth went through her lower lip and she had to get stitches.

i love seeing the skill and performance of such a range of actors and also i wonder how people older like andré de shields as hermes handles the physical demands. he is pretty constantly on stage and singing.

labor rights is disability justice. art shouldn't cost the performers their health.