Hi! I'm an ace, overly rambly, blind nineteen-year-old (WistfulWhimsy on ao3) who's passionate about representation in media, obsesses over Broadway musicals, and reads books constantly! I also enjoy writing and getting wrapped up in my lil Fantasy worlds. she/her, INFP, fandoms include Grishaverse, Shadowhunters, Cosmere Carry On, and Riordanverse.
HAPPY DISABILITY PRIDE all!! Someday it will be a huge event with ao3 tags, parades every day, and celebrations of weirdness and inclusivity and disabled joy! But for now, I hope you all know how gorgeous and worthy and incredible you are. Don't let people tell you you need to do more, be better, try harder. They will never understand, but there are people out there who do! Also, give yourself permission to fantasize about roasting the people who won't stop ask you invasive questions lol! Even if the world does not accept us yet, let's have a virtual outpouring of love and pride for all that the disabled community has been through and all that we have contributed to the world! Love y'all <3
Prompt: Simon is smitten with Baz and decides to finally shoot his shot! Unfortunately, he has terrible game.
Ao3 tag: idiots to lovers
@bookishbroadwayandblind thank you for this one!!! I took your prompt so, so literally, and I loved writing it. We didn't EXACTLY make it to lovers, but please imagine that's the very-soon-to-come epilogue. Yes I did write a tiny epilogue in the tags at the end.
Love & Basketball: A Microfic
I can tell something is bothering Basil when he gets in the car.
"Hi mum," he says glumly, sliding down in the front seat as low as he can go. He glances back at the crowd of boys waiting a few times as we drive away.
"How was practice?" I say carefully. It's a mixed basketball league with boys from all over the city; I hope he's not being bullied. Not that posh boys from his fancy prviate school can't bully an openly gay teammate just as easily as anyone else. Daphne, I chide myself, stop being classist. Maybe it's nothing.
"Fine," he says. Glumly again.
"You don't seem fine," I say.
"Well..." long, long pause. I wait it out; I may only have been his mum a few years, but I've learned a few tricks. "There's this boy."
Not nothing then. I press my lips together to keep myself from launching into question mode. "Tell me more."
"He just..." Basil breathes out through his mouth in a long huff; I don't think I've ever seen him this much at a loss for words. "I don't know how to explain it."
"Is he hurting you?"
"No!" he says quickly.
"Has he said something mean to you?"
"No, mum. It's not like that."
I take a deep breath of relief. "Okay. Can you tell me a bit about what it is like? I promise I won't interrupt again."
He watches the road in front of us for a while while I wait, mentally running through what I could make for dinner that's on his list of favorites.
"He's just...he's loud," Basil says finally. "He's really loud, and he always plays really hard, even though he's terrible at it. It's so awful watching him play. He might be the worst person I've ever seen at basketball. But like, he doesn't foul people or anything, he's really fair. Annoyingly fair. He's really intense, and he's always looking at me, but then he pretends like he wasn't. And he's always talking about me, too. I can hear him. He talks to everyone about me but he never talks to me."
"What kinds of things does he say? Are they mean?"
Basil thinks about it. "I don't know if they're mean or not."
"Give me an example."
"I heard him telling Gareth that my hair was too perfect to be real. I don't even know how that would work. Does he think I'm secretly bald?"
Odd insult...
"And he told Rhys he thinks I smell too good at the end of practice. But I work harder than everyone else! I can't help it."
I mentally pat myself on the back for the body wash I got him last Christmas. No teenage boy smell in my house, I vowed.
"And today he hit me in the back of the head with the basketball! Really hard!"
"What! I thought you said he hadn't hurt you! Did he do it on purpose?" I asked, already mentally composing a sternly-worded text message to the coach.
"Well...I was really angry about it, and I might have yelled at him." Basil pauses. "And I think...I don't think he meant to. He is really bad at basketball. When I yelled, he burst into tears and ran into the locker room and wouldn't come out again."
My heart aches a little for this unknown boy against my will, but again, I don't say anything.
"I think maybe I should see if he's okay. I didn't mean to hurt his feelings. I just don't know why he won't talk to me."
Hmm...
"Do you want him to talk to you?" I try.
"Maybe," he mutters. "I mean, he's fine. It's whatever. It's fine. It's nothing."
"I have the contact sheet Coach Mac sent at the beginning of the school year. Do you want to get his number off of it and reach out?"
"I don't know..." he mumbles.
I send it to him anyway, and pointedly don't ask about it again.
But when he's glued to his mobile for the next week, grinning like a loon at the screen every free moment, and when he asks if we can give a friend a ride home, I give myself another mental pat on the back. Daphne, it won't always be like this, but enjoy the I'm-a-good-mum glow when and while you can.
I have something less than a resolution. Or more, maybe, because resolutions can be things that we've already accepted we're probably not going to follow through on. A goal? A wish? A dream my heart makes? Maybe let's just say I'm starting this year pining for something, and the something is more fun. It’s messy and scary and busy and overwhelming out here, and we're surrounded by forces telling us that we’re robots made to work and kill time and that we don't deserve nice things like democracy and rest. I'd like to tell those forces to fuck off, and have some fun and rest and joy where I can in spite of them.
In that spirit, I have a game. Drop a prompt and a ao3-style tag in my asks and I’ll write you a micro fic for it. I get to pick who it’s about (and fair warning, it will likely be Snowbaz). I’ll try to tackle them quickly but no promises.
You can send as many as you like as long as you have patience, but send me at least one! I’d like to see if this jostles my mental writing block a bit. Give me something to write for you. Let’s have fun together in the new year.
To kick it off, I have a WIP snippet for @rimeswithpurple whose prompt is our entire CORB project, and also tags under the cut! This is rough--just dialogue--but I still like it :)
Penny: You can't tell me you don't want to get off the farm.
Baz: I love the farm.
Agatha: Baz, I love you, but if you ever want anything to change, you have to do it yourself.
Baz: You're one to talk.
Agatha: We know everyone in a 25 km radius. One or the other of us is probably related to them, even. A cute boy isn't going to emerge from the woodwork even if we do have magic!
bell chimes over the door
All three look up. Penny gasps; Agatha drops a cup.
Penny: Why'd you drop that?
Agatha: You startled me! Why'd you gasp?
Penny: It's that guy! That one I was telling you about, who's been asking questions everywhere.
Shep: Hello?
Simon: Maybe they're closed.
The guys glance their way and all three duck under the table.
"What do we do?" Agatha hisses.
Penny: Someone has to go talk to them!
Agatha: I don't, because one, I don't work here. Two, you can't make me, and three, I don't talk to boys anymore.
May Agatha's spirit bless you and keep you today and always:
Hellooo loves! I meant to do this last year but alas... 2025 was the year of unfinished things for the most part lol! But 2026 has thus far been productive... ish...
I needed to cope with a LOT this year, so of course I wrote a lot, as a means of both understanding and escaping the world! The word-count was 280,525 words... isn't that satisfying? It has 2025 IN it!! Anyway, let's talk about the stuff I published!
I finished All The Sadness of the World, my atmospheric, moody Phantom of the Opera AU, written as a means of processing ableism but also so much tenderness and love. I'm actually quite proud of it? We'll see how long that lasts! I also wrote a little retrospective about Agatha, but if she were aroace, for the absolutely amazing @best--dress, called Time, Curious Time, that I'm... less proud of, but hey! It has its moments! Next, I wrote about half of me and @iamamythologicalcreature's WICKED AU!! Me and the sensational, fantastic, remarkable Jo posted chapter one this year! It's called As Long As You're Mine and it was for the COBB 2025! Next, I posted All My Longings, You'd Return Them, a WIP that is aaalmost finished about soulmates, complicated feelings, and hurt/comfort. It taps into my personal journey with sexuality and vulnerability, and it is a gift for @comesitintheclover for the Anniversary Exchange! I'm planning on finishing it this January.
But OF COURSE I must mention my work for COC!! This one is also still unfinished, but I am planning to continue it—I just have 3 works left to post! The whole series is about 115k (... idk how that happened either) and has a lot of fun stories in it! I hope you will find one that you enjoy! Of course, I was so inspired by all the other lovely creators! I loved writing about frog princes, Victorian robots, Grinchy Baz, Baby Simon, and a whole lot of other wholesome, gushy, angsty stuff <3
I read 41 books, my two favorites being The Chosen and the Beautiful and My Friends!! I had a breakup, got into astrology, started my English degree, and made some lovely friends! I loved my first full year in this fandom. I'm not planning on going anywhere; in fact, I'm hoping to get more involved! So let me know if you have fic requests, a need for a beta reader, or just someone to read your fics and cheer you on! This fandom is so dear to me and I love seeing the amazing stories that are being told each and every day! Here's to a fantastic new year!
Thank you to @thewholelemon, @fiend-for-culture, @best--dress, @prettygoododds, @probablily, and @monbons for the tags! Warm hellos to @aristocratic-otter, @argumentativeantitheticalg, @musicallychaos @artsyunderstudy @youarenevertooold @you-remind-me-of-the-babe @bookish-bogwitch @bachusekart @jyae23 @raeny-day @arthurkko @drowninginships @1moon1spirit @carryonmybloodylovelies @morganalegay @speakwithmagic @hushed-chorus @waywardcatcollection-blog @iamamythologicalcreature @comesitintheclover @facewithoutheart @arthurkko @dontdoitjosh @wyldwyldwytch @emeryhall @toc-the-scrambled @blackberrysummers @orange-peony @martsonmars @ileadacharmedlife @bazzydl @skeedelvee @confusedbiqueer
Thanks y'all for the tags! I loved seeing everyone's year wrapped! This year was so many things but here are a few things I did...
I started fanbinding:
I started rebinding books:
I learned how to make foiled art prints:
I read 77 books (45 new, 32 rereads)
I learned how to wallpaper
I built a canopy for over my bed
I went above and beyond for my Halloween costume
I started hanging out with a new friend, and an old friend
I spent five months trying to properly medicate my ADHD & depression (we're still not quite there with this one folks)
I wrote 100,185 words, though I didn't publish all of those
I did publish the following:
You know I love you still
11k, E, canon-compliant
One day. Five years. A peek into what it's like to love and be loved by Simon Snow.
I'm particularly proud of this one. I think about it a lot. The prompt requested an exploration of Simon's depression, and, as someone with depression, I put a lot of myself into it.
Candle in the Wind
5k, E, canon-compliant, pure smut
Baz and Simon try their hand at a bit of roleplay.
This one was incredibly fun to write. The prompt happened to exactly match a fic I had started writing months previous so it felt like destiny.
In truth
35k, M, Historical/Regency AU, in progress
The long absent Tyrannus Basilton makes a reappearance in society at the start of London's Social Season much to the thrill and torment of his former roommate, Simon Snow.
I updated this one last night. I love this fic. I've never worked on something so diligently, and over such a long period of time. It's some of the prettiest writing I've ever done.
I also completed every day of the Carry On Countdown!
There's more stuff but this post is already so long. I have lots of hope for next year and am looking forward to spending it with all of you 💝
I find you all incredibly inspiring and can't wait to see what we do next 💖🎊
Thanks @thewholelemon, @monbons, and @probablily for tagging me 🤗 it's been an honor to pass another year by your sides!
I'm home sick for New Year's Eve. I've pretty much accepted that my body is insisting I rest, rather than tie up every single loose end of the year the way I planned, but I really wanted to at least write this one post. I spent so much of my year making things for fandom and I found a lot of the joy of 2025 in my relationships here.
A few weeks ago I went through my journals and made a big list of everything significant I did this year (which helped immensely in writing this post, lol). I compared the list of things I had accomplished with the list of things I wanted to get done, and I realized that most of the creative projects I completed were the ones I did here, supported by this community. All of the projects that I didn't finish (or start) were ones that I didn't have peers to talk about my work with. This is something I'm thinking about a lot as I start to look ahead at 2026. 😎
Anyway, here are 2025's highlights!
Writing (and art!)
January: published chapter 5 of Who Are You In The Dark, my Watford-era fem!snowbaz AU for @carry-on-big-bang 2024
February: published Where Angels Fear To Tread, 90s-era AU where Baz is a tarot reader, prompted by @mooncello for @carry-on-au-fest, and my first art for the story: Baz as The Fool
March: more art for my tarot AU: Simon and Baz as the Two of Cups and Penny as the Queen of Swords
April: published chapter 6 of WAYITD and Push the beds together, my Penny/Trixie/Keris threesome fic for @carry-on-sapphic-week
June: published Indiscreet, an Agatha/Mitali fic inspired by @martsonmars and @onepintobean's incredible 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover. Also drew Simon and Baz at the Coney Island Mermaid Parade for @iamamythologicalcreature's birthday!
September: published chapter 7 of WAYITD
October: three little fics! Sick of Swimming, Ready to Stand is a Little Mermaid AU featuring Agatha as the little mermaid, covering her entire 3-book character arc. It's the most underrated thing I wrote this year and under 4k, you should definitely go read it right now. I wrote A Fancy Tea-Place Tea for Simon for @ileadacharmedlife for the Carry On Discord's 10th Anniversary exchange, and sk8er boi for @carryonthroughtheages, a 2000s-era historical fic 🤭 featuring skater!Simon and emo!Baz. And then @monbons made the most perfect dolls inspired by it 😭
December: coming in right under the wire, I published chapter 8 of WAYITD last night. One of my goals was to finish it before the end of the year - that's not happening, because there's one more chapter 🙃 but it's mostly written, so you'll see it sooner than my typical 3-4 months between chapters, lol
I published a total of 56,910 words, which I'm super proud of 😊
Other highlights
I got back into figure drawing and pole dancing
I got obsessed with The Mars House thanks to @thewholelemon and I also read and loved Single Player (lesbian gamers enemies to lovers!) and Stay True, a really gorgeous memoir of a friendship
I went to visit @iamamythologicalcreature and we binge watched the first season and a half of Bridgerton, among other things. Other notable watches: Kamikaze Girls, K-Pop Demon Hunters, and Camp (an indie horror-ish film about summer camp and female friendship, my two favorite things? I saw it as part of a film fest and my date didn't stay for the director q+a afterwards. Never went out with her again)
I saw Chappell Roan and Lorde in concert
My top 5 artists of the year were Chappell Roan, Lana Del Rey, Taylor Swift, Lorde, and Megan Moroney. Taylor fell to #3 because I did not love the new album, although I have Theories about it. My #1 song was Sailor Song by Gigi Perez; my #5 song was that One Direction song that soundtracked the Solstice Ball scene in WAYITD, thanks to @louisandtheaquarian
I saw Barbie: A Cultural Icon at the Museum of Art and Design, Monstrous Beauty at the Met, the Amy Sherald retrospective at the Whitney, Spectrum of Desire at the Cloisters, and the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade balloons the night before the parade
I went on dates with 5 different people and kissed 2 of them, and they were all disappointing.
2026?
I have a couple of personal projects that I really want to dig into in 2026, so writing fic might take a backseat to that. I just got the email about the Valentine's exchange and I am so excited to participate in that again!
Something I would LOVE to do more of in 2026 is beta-reading, so if that's something you're looking for, I would love to be your girl!
I'm also planning a cross-country train trip, and a few of you might be on my route 🤩 please know I will be dropping in to your DMs if I'll be nearby. And, as always, if you're ever in NYC, hit me up. I'm almost always here.
wishing you all the happiest and healthiest: @facewithoutheart, @thewholelemon, @ileadacharmedlife, @martsonmars, @youarenevertooold, @rimeswithpurple, @aristocratic-otter, @leithillustration, @iamamythologicalcreature, @alexalexinii, @cutestkilla, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @artsyunderstudy, @mooncello, @onepintobean, @emeryhall, @arthurkko, @ivelovedhimthroughworse, @monbons, @ic3-que3n, @probablily, @blackberrysummers, @bookish-bogwitch, @fiend-for-culture, @orange-peony, @bookishbroadwayandblind, @whatevertheweather, @shrekgogurt
Happy last day of 2025!!! Thank you to @monbons @thewholelemon and @run-for-chamo-miles for mentioning me in your wrap up posts! Rest of this post is under the cut because it'll be very long, but I keep a detailed writing spreadsheet so you can expect data and graphs if you read it!!!
FICS I'VE POSTED
I posted 8 fics this year + finished 1 wip posted last year. 4 for Carry On, 3 for Stranger Things, 1 for Dunmeshi, and 1 for Heated Rivalry / Gamechangers. Only two multichapter works this year, both for different years of the Carry On Big Bang.
According to AO3, I've posted 69,275 words this year!! Which is quite a lot less than the 204,704 words I posted last year, but I'm still proud of it! This brings my total numbers posted on AO3 to 357,977 words and 39 fics.
i can be the cat, baby, you can be the mouse - 9.3k, E, Dunmeshi, Falin/Marcille. Marcille loves Falin, but Falin claims she isn't the same as she used to be—not entirely. She wants things she never used to want. But Marcille will give them to her. No matter what. My first smut fic. I actually wrote all except for about 500 words of this in 2024, but I finished and posted it in January. I actually reread this fic the other day and it's really good?? I would recommend at least. It's probably the only fic I'll ever write for this fandom, even though at one point I had illusions of a sequel.
magnetic magical everything - 5.2k, M, Stranger Things, Robin/Chrissy. Robin and Chrissy are roommates and best friends. While Robin might want more, she knows that's never going to happen. Right? I wrote this for the Stranger Things Sapphic Fic Exchange and it was so much fun! I'd never written this ship before and probably won't again, but I love how it turned out.
Sunny With a Chance of Romance - 800, T, Stranger Things, Robin/Nancy. The news anchor Nancy and weather reporter Robin fic that exactly one (1) person asked for. This fic was an expansion of a little something I wrote for this anon ask. It was a lot fun and not something I usually write!!
Be Mine - 2.1k, T, Carry On, Ebb/Fiona. Fiona's older sister is getting married. Gross. At least her best friend Ebb is there to keep her company… This is actually one of my favorite fics I've written this year. I had so much fun with it and I think you guys should read it too!!!
Wear Blue - 1.8k, T, Stranger Things, Robin/Nancy. Nancy Wheeler wants to know people's stories. She's made a job out of asking people about them—jounalist, interviewer, content creator. She's always had a hard time explaining what she does for a living. But, now, she's got an audience for herself. And a chance to interview the famous Robin Buckley… Here's what happens before. My attempt at a social media au. I had a lot of fun coming up with the different social media comments on this one!
A Pitch With Wings and a Bloodthirsty Chosen One - 15k, T, Carry On, Simon/Baz. Simon Snow grew up with large red wings and a devil's tail. A interesting choice for a Chosen One. His magic isn't much better. One day, he messes up a spell that swaps his magic with Baz's—wings and vampirism included. So now Baz has wings and a tail and can't control his terrible magic, and Simon has magic that works perfectly fine… but he's now got fangs and thirst for blood. How will Simon and Baz fix this? And what will happen as they grow closer together…? My fic for the @carry-on-big-bang 2025 with @lauillu!! I had a lot of fun writing this and the art is so so so pretty. You should click that link just to see the art.
baby, i will 'cause i really want to - 5.2k, E, Carry On, Agatha/Helen. When Agatha sees Helen, her parent's maid and her childhood nanny, in America, she thinks that her parents have finally tried to track her down. But it turns out, Helen's not here for them. She's here for Agatha. This written for the Carry On Anniversay Fic Exchange for @best--dress!! my second ever smut fic. This was a lot of fun to write, plus I got to christen the Agatha/Helen tag on ao3.
What Jackie Knows - 4.1k, T, Heated Rivalry/Game Changers, Shane/Ilya, Outsider POV. 5 times Jackie learns something about Shane + 1 time she learns something about Ilya NEW FANDOM TIME. I have so many more ideas for this fandom. I anticiapted having two or even three shane/ilya fics finished before the end of the year, but then i got Sick :( so this is the only one. I had a lot of fun with it, and large fandoms are crazy because this now has 3 times as many kudos as any other fic I've written. i feel insane.
The Way We Are - 37k, M, Carry On, Simon/Baz. Baz and Simon meet in a coffee shop not knowing that one of them is a vampire and the other a vampire hunter. After a tense encounter, both of them are left with questions about who they are and their morality. And as if that’s not enough, neither of them can stop thinking about the other… My 2024 COBB with @alexalexinii. The only WIP i brought with me from 2024 and it still took me the entire year to finish it. I have a lot of complicated feelings about this fic but I am so happy I finished it! (and sorry if you left a comment recently i have Not been answering them 😭) Alex's art for this fic is SO AMAZING, even if you're not in the mood to read the fic, scroll through each chapter and look at the art, i am Not joking.
FANWORKS GIFTED TO ME
I cannot make this whole post without shouting out the lovely gifts I got this year!! Recieving gift fic, whether it's part of a fandom event or just for fun, is one of the most exciting things about fandom. You made something for me!!! thank you!! Here are some lovely fics that everyone should read <3
Meet Ugly by ItCanBePalped - 7.7k, T, Stranger Things, Robin/Nancy. Robin is a known mess. Usually the fallout doesn't extend beyond her own being, but clearly this morning is an awful, awful exception. It's not bad enough that she fell into bed with her ex again, that Steve is the worst and not awake to pick her up from her walk of shame-- she has to injure someone, too. A really pretty someone. This was made for the Sapphic Stranger Things Winter Exchange! I love a meet ugly and this hit all the right boxes for me!!
Next Week by sweetronancer / @sweetronancer - 554, G, Stranger Things, Robin/Nancy. Robin knew that working in fast food was…Difficult, to say the least. Giving orders on time, making them correctly, having to deal with every customer who decided to complain about the food they were given… It was stressful and overwhelming sometimes, but making friends with your coworkers made it a little better. And seeing a cute customer never hurt anybody. What is fandom friendship if not gifiting you a niche AU on your birthday?? Percy, ily 🫶
Ebb and Fiona dolls by @monbons!!! These dolls sit in a place of honor in my dorm room. Genuinely one of the coolest things that I've ever received. Monica, I will forever be impressed and in awe of your doll making skills!!
Don't Die Wondering by Monstrous_Femme / @monstrous-femme - 4.5k, M, Stranger Things, Robin/Nancy. In the Winnebago, hours before they're probably all going to die, Nancy realizes that she doesn't want to die wondering. This is was one of my @fandomtrumpshate fics!! I loved this fic so much, it's got my secret dating angst that I love.
Fakeout by drowninginships / @drowninginships - 3.1k, E, Carry On, Simon/Baz. Simon is an omega, and he needs his alpha roommate's help. Unfortunately, Baz is hiding something. OMEGA/OMEGA SNOWBAZ!!! I was so so so honored to receive this gift. You all should be running to read this if you haven't already!!
Return to Sender by ciescen / @ciescen - WIP, 7k, T, Carry On, Simon/Baz. Simon accidentally writes an incomplete address on a letter to Penny, which causes it to get sent to an unknown recipient instead. Another one of my Fandom Trumps Hate fics!! I am woefully behind in reading some of the updates, but the concept for this fic is literally my favorite thing!! You should all read it!!!
Podifc of A Proper Heirloom by speakwithmagic / @speakwithmagic - 20 min, G, Carry On, Simon/Baz. A podfic of this fic of mine!! It was so cool to have someone create a podfic of one of my works!!! And you should all check out the other podfics in this collections, there's so many good ones!
WORDS I'VE WRITTEN
Time for the exciting part!! My stats!!!!
I wrote 169,657 words this year.
This is my first year using a spreadsheet all the way through the year, so you give me any date and I can tell you how many words I wrote and on what fic I worked on. Here's the overview per month.
On average, I wrote 461 words per day, but that varies wildly with a low of 0 and a high of 5957 (on April 18th). If we remove the zeros, on days that I write, I write an average of 997 words. However, just looking through my stats, I'd say that on months were I write every day, I tend to write about 200-500 words a day, and when I go long periods between writing, I write closer to 1000-1500words a day. If i write more than 1500, I would say that's a lot written in a day for me.
And here's showcasing the distribution of words between my different projects this year! A reminder that this is total words written as counted at the end of every day, not net total, so some of these words have scene been deleted.
You might have to click on the images to see them better.
As you can see, omega!buck took over my life for a bit. That's what accounts for pretty much all of the words in written in april through august of my word counter. i have come through the other side of my 911 obsession through (it might come back), and I don't know if I'll ever finish any of the buddie wips on this spreadsheet.
Other Fun Things about 2025
Since this post isn't long enough, here's a few highlights from my year:
I got a girlfriend!!
I got obsessed with 9-1-1, annoyed all my friends with it, read copious amounts of fanfic, wrote over 100k words of fanfic that i didn't ever post, and now have finally mellowed out a bit. We'll see how that stays once the show starts airing again.
I finally figured out what my next school year is going to look like. i'm student teaching all year and had spent so so so long trying to decide if i wanted to do that in my hometown or my college town. I'm going to do my hometown but I won't be living with my parents because I'd probably Die actually.
I started reading!! Real books again!!! Follow me on storygraph!! I read 36 whole books this year :)
I switched from using google docs to write, to ellipsus! My favorite thing about that is I can make folders, so I don't have to look at fics I've abanonded or completed cluttering up my space. They can be stored in the Folder.
I've learned that posting fics before I finish writing them does not work for me and only stresses me out.
My favorite fanfiction that I read this year was stay alive open wide by @dogfishmonger. Do not be intimindated by the word count, i could sing this fic's praises forever and ever.
Now, in the month of decemeber, i have gotten obsessed with heated rivalry and i think i will be living here for a little while. you should join me!
Looking Ahead to 2026
Thankfully, I've finished all my WIPS on ao3, so I don't feel like I have any of those hanging over my head to complete in the new year. I have my Carry On Reverse Bang Fic to finish but I am making Progress (don't look at chart and see how many words i have). I don't know if I'll ever finish any of the 9-1-1 fics I started. I do love the omega!buck universe I built, but I don't know if i can dedicate myself to it for as long as it'll need, now that my initial writing obsession has completely worn off.
My main goal for 2026 to have fun writing. This year i made writing a little too much a chore for me, and I need to revist my mental approach coming forward. I had a lot of fun writing my heated rivalry fic this month, so you might expect to see a lot of those and maybe a little less carry on for a bit.
But know that the carry on fandom is home to me, even if i get distracted by shiny new gay hockey boys. It's been refreshing having something new with less of my own mental expectations.
But i'm going to keep writing!! and i'm going to have fun!!! and it's going to be 2026 in like 12 hours i am NOT READY!!
Thank you @monbons and @thewholelemon for the tag.
This year has felt chaotic. Sometimes the only time I could sit and write was if the pressure of a deadline loomed. I signed up for more events because of that and my older works suffered.
But, when prepping this posts u thought I’d see what the numbers said. I was surprised to say the least. I have not felt like I wrote a lot or posted much. But here is what A03 had to say:
This is only the posted data. Not what I have sitting in drafts needing edits. That’s probably another 20,000-30,000 words.
All this to say, maybe I need to lay off myself. Things were fine. I just need to figure out how to get those same results with older works so I can wrap up my wips.
Book wise, I don’t know if I have standout books but authors I really liked this year were Freya Marske, Olivie Blake, and RF Kuang. I’m 2 books shy of my 45 book goal.
I’m like everyone else and Heated Rivalry has taken over my life. So much so, I can’t think of one other show that was a standout.
Crochet wise, the 5 bison I crocheted took up most of my time and I didn’t really finish anything else. Still working in my friends reading blanket and I might finish by this time next year. I’d like to try my hand at a sweater this next year if time allows but I’m very intimidated by clothing.
I hope 2026 brings us all a good year. Astrological ly it seems unlikely, but what do the stars know anyways (cries in Aries).
I’m tagging everyone in my list, and if you don’t see your name, consider yourself tagged and join in.
JK jk, just a little joke to stay in line with today's crackish fic, featuring a very accurate talking mood ring that Baz is forced to wear by Simon. Tomfoolery abounds. Also, lots of moods! Of course!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
This was only my second full year as an active contributor to fandom, and while I was really productive, it was also... a strange year. More on that at the end.
By The Numbers: ART
I made SO MANY DOLLS, nearly matching my numbers from last year. Overall, I produced:
14 Simons
9 Bazzes
1 of each of the following - Shep, Penny, Dev, Niall, Agatha, Keris, Trixie, Ebb, Fiona
Pictured above are several of the dolls that weren't associated with COC 2025
I also dabbled in non-doll/non-CO art. For the CO Discord Valentine's Exchange, I made 40 Baz puppets. I also got together with several fandom friends earlier this year and made 10 Penny puppets and 1 Fiona as little gifts. I made @emeryhall a very naked Simon brooch. And, because it's always so fun to figure out new characters, I finished five dolls for other fandoms. I am still sourcing props and a potential background for Hollanov, but I'll post them soon! (The brain rot is real, y'all...)
Of all my art endeavors this year, I am most proud of my collaboration with @mooncello, i do not regret you. In case you didn't see it, here is a thorough behind-the-scenes because we started working on this A YEAR AGO! Not only did we build an incredible world together, but this project pushed me the most in terms of my craft. Specifically, my clothes-making ability HAD to improve because Heath just kept challenging me with more and more complicated inspo outfits. I also had to get creative with the photography of it all, which was fun. If you somehow missed this AU, check out my master post here. (We still have a few updates outstanding... but I promise it will be worth the wait!)
By The Numbers: FIC
I was similarly prolific in the words department this year, even though looking at my ao3 wouldn't lead you to think that. I finished a few fics:
Better Than This (T, 5.5k) was a gift for @thewholelemon to celebrate our beta/friend-aversary. It's 100% fluff, unusual for me but perfect for Jenny. Hilariously, I wrote most of it on post-its while bored out of my mind and proctoring the PSAT.
Beautiful Things (E, 4.3k) was my EGF collab with @rimeswithpurple. It was the first foray into smut for both of us, and it turned out SO WELL. I'm really proud of that fic, and Arianna's art is gorgeous. If I didn't have little eyes at home, I'd blow both pieces up poster size and frame them!
I revisited The Boy Next Door universe and wrote several shorts that totaled roughly 5k.
And then there is Smile Like You Mean It. This fic is still a WIP (56k posted although I’ve written 98k). I've been actively working on it since January, so to say it is my baby would be an understatement. It's the most original story concept I’ve ever conceived: an exploration of the armor we put on in response to trauma, as well as the kind of love required to finally drop that armor and allow ourselves to be known. Deep for a cheerleading fic, no? Anyway, it's also extremely personal, and as you can imagine, has at times felt like ripping my heart out of my chest to write. I’d really hoped to have finished writing/posting it by now, but life had other plans. Speaking of...
Life was Life-ing Hard This Year
Early in the calendar year, my hands started giving me pretty significant pain. As you can imagine for someone whose primary hobbies are writing and sewing, this was a horrible blow. I've found ways to accommodate the pain in the intervening months, which mostly means accepting my limitations and resting a lot. Given that, I am even more proud of my output.
This school year was also pretty tough at work. I am teaching a brand new AP class, and it is kicking my butt. I get home so exhausted most days I can barely make dinner, let alone read or write fic. Unfortunately, there isn't much I can do about that until the school year is over.
With all that said, it's also been a really good year. I've strengthened so many of my fandom friendships this year, and even had the opportunity to visit/hang out with several people in person. I've discovered new books/authors I'm obsessed with (shout out to @thewholelemon for introducing me to the Pulleyverse), jammed to some really great music (I have @artsyunderstudy, @mooncello, and @whatevertheweather to thank here), and supported the Little Bons as they chased writing and art projects of their own (among her many hobbies, the littlest Bon has continued her tradition of gifting me Snowbaz fanfic).
Finally, I've spent hours dreaming about OCs for an original YA novel. I know! I, too, am excited... but mostly terrified. And I can't wait for you to one day meet Xavi and Theo. 🩷
Anyway, thanks for reading if you got this far. Share if you'd like. I'd love to celebrate you, no matter what this year looked like on your end of the world. Otherwise, until we meet again, take care of yourselves.
Don’t call it a wrap up (because that’s too much pressure). I should do these every quarter; an entire year is too much to try to remember. But, I'm going to try to keep it simple: just some stuff that was meaningful to me this year.
Thank you for the tags on books and movies/shows, @run-for-chamo-miles!
Stuff I Watched: Sketch, which was a great exploration of why it's healthy to like horror and sadness; Heated Rivalry, because of course; and I honestly don't remember if I watched anything else but kids' movies. My mind is a sieve.
Stuff I Read: Natasha Pulley, with greatest honors going to The Mars House, the Watchmaker of Filigree Street and Pepperharrow (which gets a place of honor for making me go into the pantry to sob hysterically at the end), and the Kingdoms; Slow Dance by Rainbow Rowell (I put off reading it but I loved it); Yield Under Great Persuasion by Alexandra Rowland.
Stuff I Wrote: When That Light Hits the Sky, which has one chapter to go but has been deeply meaningful for me to work on since it grapples with depression in a way that has been cathartic for me to write (even if it does mean it's difficult for me to write, too); Soap Operetta, which was so much fun to write and made me laugh so many times; Six of One, which was fun because I got to share with you and you guys got really into it; and my first/only(?) fandom hop with an explicit Mars House fic. I'm really proud of all of these things!
Stuff I Did: Went back to therapy (this has been really big); hung out with fandom friends; got back into journaling and filled up three notebooks in five months; beta'ed some really, really good stuff. I tried to work less, and only semi-succeeded. Got really depressed, got un-depressed. Got really anxious, got less anxious. Went to the beach, went to the woods, went camping. Saw some great shows: Brahms x Radiohead, Rilo Kiley, Hot Water Music. Went to some protests, donated some money.
What. A. Year. In many ways, it feels like we've been put through the wringer, but I've also had such incredible moments of connection and closeness that have meant the world to me. 2026, keep bringing us together in community and solidarity. Please do right by us.
And now I'm going to tag people, but if you see this, feel tagged to say goodbye to 2025 however you like:
You guys how did I get so behind... I forgot how insane it is to be with my family HAHA there's never a dull moment! Anyway, I hope you all are having the most beautiful day! You deserve it! This fic is about Daphne comforting 9-year-old Baz after a harrowing night. She's seriously amazing and I love her. I hope you enjoy!!
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
What it says on the tin! This is a sequel to my day 8 fic! Thank you all for liking, commenting, reblogging, or yapping with me! I so appreciate it! Sorry for the onslaught of fics today HAHA
COC 2025 Day 23—Roc-com featuring supportive mom!!
Listen, who WOULDN'T be in love with Baz Pitch? Simon sure is! But the Pitches are... wary, to say the least, because of some stuff David said a while ago about hating their guts. But Simon is a golden retriever, Lucy is a slayer, and the best way to win a heart is through good communication! <3
After subjecting myself to the horrors of American history, I figured, what better way to process the stress then to write a Snowbaz College AU where Baz tutors Simon!! That's right, I'm torturing them with my own school woes—but with a much happier ending!
I always wondered why people in fics got amnesia, but always seemed to remember at least something. So I wrote a fic where Baz is a clean slate, nothing but the personality traits that make him him! What follows is Simon reading to Baz, feeding him soup, teaching him language again, and helping him get his memories back—which, don't worry, they will come back. I hope you enjoy!
COC 2025 day 20—Emergency frog situation!! (iykyk)
It's not easy being green! Baz Pitch is NOT #thriving after being turned into a frog, and he thinks it'll probably be super easy to get this cute blue-eyed boy to kiss him. It's... a little more complicated than that, but with a little bit of fourth-wall breaking, some brushes with death, and some ymmy food, they'll make it through just fine! <3
