Lost My Mind @booobooothefool - Tumblr Blog

He spent so much time on them and for me he got lazy

Oh my sweet holy angels...this was something I started after Indigenous day last year (2021) but never got back around to finishing it. I've been having really bad writers block and haven't been able to finish writing the Dark!Thor fic (that I also started back in 2021) yet, but it's like 2/3rds of the way done...a lot has changed since I last posted a fic...for example I recently decided to take a break from school and dropped out of this fall term...I've also been working overtime so yeah...finally had a day off today and I spent it finishing this piece of junk... anyways, hope ya'll enjoy this trash dumped from my overworking brain (๑~๑) I also refuse to proof read...and I will die on this messy anti-beta reading hill (because my eyes hurt and I am too lazy to bother) this is also 8,798 f*cking words..so yeah

-Growing up, you were all alone until you met Steve and you two bonded over being outcasts, but after the serum, you're left all alone again...or are you?

*18+!!!*

WARNING: horrible grammar, NOT edited, bad English (please be nice I know my English is bad, it’s not my first language 🥺) mentioning of unprotected sex (wrap your willy before you get silly), mean and dark Steve, angsty, fat-shaming, ED, pregnancy, noncon, breath play, choking...honestly read at your own risk because I am a warning all on my own

...

You had the biggest crush on Steve Rogers, you fell for him the day you met him. The scrawny little boy who stood up for you when a group of kids cornered you and berated you for your weight, acne, and stubby stature. You two would get made fun of, pointed and laughed at whenever you two went out together, so instead you both would meet privately, getting away from your harsh reality to somewhere no one could disrupt you two, your shared safe space. You two began to date secretly, no one knew about you two, not even Bucky knew. When Steve would get set up with another pretty girl that was friends with Bucky's latest flame, you couldn't help but to worry if he'd lose interest in you. Steve would always reassure you that he'd never fancy such shallow women, that he only had eyes for you.

When Steve first told you that he was accepted and would be leaving soon to join the army, you fought every fiber in your body to not break down and beg him to stay, you understood that this was Steve's dream. That was the night you lost your virginity to Steve, holding him close before he would leave you for war. After Steve left you cried as you held onto the shirt he left behind for you, allowing yourself to let go off all the emotions you refused to show to within his presence.

Steve would come and visit whenever he could, whenever he came back, you two would spend most of your time together in bed, wrapped up in the sheets with every inch of your bare bodies touching. After Steve wrote and explained to you that he had received the serum you did your best to not let your fears get the better of you, this was good for Steve, he was healthier, happier, and could now achieve all his dreams with less roadblocks in his way. Steve stopped visiting just before receiving the serum, all you had left of him were his letters, but when those became more and more scarce you had to remind yourself that Steve had more responsibility now that he was the face of America, THE Captain America.

Your parents had sent you to buy things from town for dinner, as you were browsing the store shelves your eye caught a familiar blond man. He must’ve felt you watching him, Steve looked up and it was as if he was a child caught stealing candy. “Doll!” He quickly recovered and suddenly you were engulfed in muscular arms, “Y/n, what are you doing here? I was planning to surprise you.” You couldn’t reply and only stared at Steve with wide eyes, you hadn’t seen him with the serum and felt overwhelmed by his tall and muscular frame, you awkwardly returned his sudden hug.

"What happened to you Stevie? Why are you so..." you paused, your tongue stuck on what words to use that wouldn't be impolite and rude.

"Big? Healthy? Strong? Well it's thanks to the serum doll." Steve smiled down at your with his breath taking boyish smile, the same one that always made you swoon. "I've got something I must tend to, can you meet me at the Wellington Hotel? I am in room 214, be there by 10 sharp." Too stunned to realized what was happening you simply nodded your head as Steve roughly pulled away and left you standing in the aisle with all your questions and words floating in the unspoken air around you. After standing in the aisle like an odd buffoon, you managed to collect yourself and process what had just really happened. As you finished getting what you were instructed to and on your way home, you couldn't help but to wonder why Steve was staying in a hotel and not in his apartment that you helped upkeep for him in his leave, he still paid the rent regularly, you would know because you had just been there not too long ago to dust and care for his things so that they wouldn't ware away with time.

Your eldest brother's fiancé Jenny had asked for your help at the sewing mill, but instead of going you decided to use it as a cover to go meet Steve. You'd already talked to your parents and Jenny about working tonight so they wouldn't question where you were, and with the war becoming so intense they also wouldn't question you about when you'd return. Many people often found themselves working day and night in order to try and do their part for the country. Your father and brothers worked to scrap metal for the war, your mother worked to feed the family on rations, and you worked at the local sewing mill.

You did your best to be discreet in order to not draw any attention when you got to the hotel, it was indecent for an unmarried young woman to be meeting a man in a hotel like this. You carefully knocked on the door of room 214 and twiddled with your fingers nervously, you yelped when the door suddenly opened and you were yanked into the dark the room. "Wha-" Before you could finish speaking, you were silenced by Steve's hand covering your mouth.

"No one saw you coming here did they? You didn't tell anyone you were coming to see me did you?" You pulled Steve's hand away from your mouth and huffed a few breaths of air before replying, "No, it would be indecent, I made sure to be careful." Steve seemed to relaxed and sighed in relief, "Good, I don't want to risk anyone knowing." You wanted to question Steve as to what he meant and why the lights were off in the dark room but before you could ask him he was already pulling at your clothes and kissing your jaw, your mind clouded as you melted like goo in his arms.

You gasped as Steve lifted you and wrapped your legs around his waist, something you two had never done before due to your size differences. He walked you over to the bed and threw you onto it, he open the front of your dress and pushed down your bra as he slid down your body while his mouth bit and sucked its way down from your jaw to your breasts. The room filled with the sounds of your panting and moans of needing more, but Steve didn't seem to make a sound. When you reached up to hold Steve close, he roughly pulled away from your touch and grabbed your wrists, holding them down with one hand as he used his other to bunch up your dress around your hips and ripped your underwear off to place himself at your entrance. You could feel that he still had all his clothes on and had simply taken his cock out of his pants. Without warning Steve shoved himself inside of you, when you opened your mouth to scream from the pain of not being prepared properly Steve slammed his free hand over you mouth, covering your nose as well. As he barbarically pumped in and out of you, he finally began to moan, and instead of your name coming from his lips, Steve repeated another woman's name.

Peggy.

Your tears wouldn't stop as you felt yourself losing consciousness from the lack of air and pain of Steve's brutal thrusts. As you tried to free your hands and shook your head violently side to side in hopes of removing his hand from blocking your airways, you felt yourself becoming more and more tired until everything eventually faded and you lost consciousness.

It was still dark out when you woke up, you found yourself laying sprawled out on the floor in the cold with nothing covering you. Carefully gathering yourself and doing your best to stand on your aching legs as your neither regions screamed in pain, you looked around for Steve and saw him sleeping peacefully on the bed. When you couldn't stand anymore due to the painful aftermath of what Steve did to you, you decided to settle on the edge of the bed, but as soon as you sat Steve suddenly kicked you off onto the floor.

"Get out, people will be waking up soon." You sat stunned, unable to move as you replayed his words in your head over and over again. "Did you not hear me?" Steve got up from the bed and roughly grabbed your arm and dragged you towards the door, "Fix your rags and get out."

"Steve..."You felt as though the air was suddenly as hard as the bricks that made up the walls around you.

"Y/n, I gave you what you wanted, now get out. I will not be repeating myself." Steve's nose flared in anger as he glared into your soul.

"I...I thought you loved me?" Your tears began to fall again, your mind scrambled, unable to understand what was happening.

"Y/n, look at yourself and then look at me. I am every woman and man's dream, why would I be with someone like you? You are fat, your face is covered in acne scars and you are far too short for me. My status is too high to be associated with someone like you. Before the serum I was just as much a loser as you, but now I am the image of perfection, I cannot be with someone who is the definition of 'other'. After I received the serum I came to the realization that we couldn't be together anymore, I've also met someone else...last night was just me making sure that I truly loved her, and it can also be seen as a goodbye to you. I used to feel guilty, but being with you last night made me realize that your body does nothing but disgust me now that I've been with the true love of my life. Now get out before people start waking up, or else I will call for security and tell them that you are a crazy woman who came in here in hopes of harassing Captain America." Steve didn't spare you another look as he opened the door and gestured for your to leave. You quietly gathered yourself and limped out of the room as he shut the door behind you before you could turn around to say goodbye to him.

You limped and made it home before the sun finished rising, you decided to shower and scrubbed yourself clean of evidence from the previous night, hoping to scrub away the pain of Steve's brutal assault and his words with the crusted cum on your legs and breasts. After you finished cleaning off, you decided to sleep in hopes of sleeping away the pain and to avoid seeing your parents in your current mental state. No one disturbed your sleep, thinking that you had spent the whole night at the mill working.

When you finally awoke, you didn't know what to do or think...you seemed to go through the days with little to no emotions, you became quieter and withdrew from everyone around you more and more, feeling disgusted with yourself and replaying Steve's cruel words over and over again in your head, you began to skip meals. When asked about your sudden change, you simply blamed it on the stress of war times and that worked, until you came down with what you thought was a stomach bug that wouldn't leave. But even then you ignored it, even when your clothes started shrinking despite you starving yourself, or when your monthlies never came, you ignored all the signs and evidence of that night until you couldn't anymore. One night after you came home from the mill you found you parents and brothers all sitting in the dining room waiting for you.

"Sit y/n." Your father sat at the head of the table, in this house his word was the law. You sat and looked down at the table, refusing to look up and meet the eyes of your family members or down at your lap that was covered by your growing middle. "William asked Jenny about what happened at the mill four months ago, specifically the night when you limped home and refused to speak to anyone before sleeping the whole day and night away. She said that you never made it to the mill, so tell us y/n, if you did not go to the mill then who did you meet? Because whoever it is, I know that they are the father of that bastard child you are caring." You felt the tears fall one at a time until suddenly, all at once. You finally let yourself go and allowed the sobs to take over your body as everything you'd been ignoring came crushing down on you.

"Oh dear..." your mother came to your side and held you in her arms as your sobs violently shook throughout your body. She carefully wiped away your tears and whispered soft words to you. "What happened dear, tell mom, I won't be mad. Please, you are my only daughter, I've seen how you no longer smile, how you've become withdrawn and dulled."

After a few hiccups, you finally managed to whisper out the words you'd been dreading to face, "I was raped..." As the words left your tongue, your sobs grew louder and you felt your body give out, falling slack into your mother's safe embrace. Your brothers sucked in a breath and your father sat stunned, they seemed to piece together your mother's words and observations with their own experiences with you the last few months and digested it alongside the three horrid words you spoke aloud.

"Y/n..." Your eldest brother William whispered your name and looked at your broken state as the rest his words died before he could speak them. There were always stories of young girls being assaulted, but that was something that only happened to other people...except now it had happened to you, their little sister, and they didn't know what to do or feel.

"Did you see how he looked like?" Your father's voice cracked, betraying him as he tried to hold a strong front at the head of the table. You didn't trust yourself to reply, unable to lie to your family anymore, so instead all you did was cry harder, conflicted with what you were facing. Your mother cried tears of her own as she hushed you like a child and held you closer to her, she looked up at your father with pleading eyes and he understood what she was asking. Even without words, your mother's pained eyes pleaded at your father to not force you to speak and relive the pain you'd experienced that night, and although he wanted to know more in order to try and help you, he complied to your mother's unsaid plea and nodded at your brothers to hold their tongues. "Y/n, you are my only daughter, your mother and I love you very much. But in order to protect you, we must send you away. Your late uncle left your mother his farm, it is far but also close enough that we can come to visit you from time to time...it would be safest and best for you to live there. If you stay here then people will talk, and both you and your child may become endangered due to gossip."

You held your mother tighter, shoving your face further into her chest as you nodded and tried to drown out the sniffling of your brothers silently crying around the family table. The rest of the night was spent packing your things, by morning your things were all loaded into your brother John's work car and everyone waved goodbye to you as your parents drove you away from your childhood home.

When you arrived at the deserted farm your father unloaded the car as your mother helped you clean and unpack some of your things, the drive had taken a full day and night of traveling. You felt guilty and insisted your parents rested a day or two before they returned home, but because of work they ended up only staying that day before starting the drive back.

A month passed and you slowly became accustomed to the house, you worked to sew and fix up old clothes and shoes that Jenny would have William give to John whenever he came by to drop off necessities for you. Your belly grew bigger and it soon became harder to do things around the house, you often found yourself walking around barefoot on the cold hard wooden floors since it had become too hard to bend and put on your socks and shoes. Because John would come to drop off things for you to help patch up, you were able to make a few pennies on the side to prepare for the baby's arrival. You also sent letters home with him and received many from each member of your family, especially your mother.

But John suddenly stopped coming, and then your mother sent a letter through the mail telling you not to try and contact home until John came back. She didn't detail why but you felt that maybe some folks from back home may have started gossiping about your sudden departure, so you respected your mother's wish and stopped writing as instructed and waited for her to write you again or for John to visit and let you know of when this sudden ban would be lifted.

After 2 months of nothing but silence, you became worried. You wanted to return home to see if everything was alright, but now that you were around 6-7 months pregnant, you decided against it and did your best to sit tight in the nearly empty house. You missed seeing your brother, you often found yourself sitting in silence with your ears subconsciously searching for the sound of an old engine, hoping that John would be back to collect the items you'd patched up and with letters from your family with him.

One night while you were upstairs getting ready for bed, your ears caught the sound of an engine. You thought maybe your mind was play tricks, but the sound got closer and before your knew it, your legs began to waddle their way as fast as possible through the house. From the window you could see that there was a vehicle in the front of the house, you were a bit confused at first, you knew what John's work car looked like and it definitely wasn't the one outside, but you chose to ignore the bad feeling at the pit of your stomach after reminding yourself that only your family knew you were out here in the middle of nowhere.

There was a loud knock at the front door and you tried to fasten your pace to go open the door to greet your family after not seeing them for so long. Who you came face to face with stunned you, your instinct kicked in and just as quickly as you'd opened the door, you shut it again and locked it.

"Open the door right now doll, you don't know what I've gone through in order to be here." Steve banged his fist against the door over and over, each one harder than the last, "if you don't open the door then you're gonna regret it. I'm serious y/n, how do you think I found you? I have your family and if you don't open this door then you're never gonna see them ever again." Afraid of what he'd do to your family, you quickly unlocked and opened the door for him.

"What are you doing here?" Your words wavered like your bravery, showcasing your fear.

"Why else would I be here doll, I'm here for you and our child." You stared at Steve and carefully studied his features, he looked older, rougher, his hair was no longer the bright blond it was those months ago, it was now a darker dirty blond. After a while of standing and staring at each other in silence, Steve carefully pushed his way inside. "I know you must have more questions, but I'll explain more inside."

You numbly led him into the living room and stood away from him "Where is my family? What have you done to them?"

"I'll get to that doll, first come here and let me hold you, it's been so long since I've seen you." Steve walked over to you and wrapped his arms around you before you could get away.

"Let me go Steve, tell me where my family is now." You tried to pull away from his embrace but Steve just held you tighter.

"You know y/n, your reaction is a bit different from your family's..did you know I went missing? That I was presumed dead after saving the world by diving myself and a plane loaded with a bomb into ice cold water?" You scrunched your eyebrows together, not understanding anything Steve was saying, he was very clearly alive and in front of you. As if understanding something Steve laughed bitterly as he released you from his embrace and grabbed your upper arms to shake you, "You didn't know? You claim to love me and yet you didn't know that I, the father of your child, died?" He paused to think for a second and scoffed, "Well I guess it does make sense that you wouldn't know, after all, you're out here in the middle of nowhere all alone."

"Steve I don't know what you're talking about or what you want, so please just tell me where my family is and leave me alone." You became more and more frightened by Steve's odd behavior and the crazy things he was saying.

Steve shook his head and looked down at you, "Your family is safe y/n, they put up quite a fight when I came back from the dead to find you. They kept claiming that you'd gotten married and left, but I already knew the truth, I knew that you hadn't left because you got married. I checked for your records when I woke up in the future y/n, couldn't help but wonder what happened to you after I found out that Peggy went off and married, she lived a happy life without me. Should've known that the bitch would move on as easily as she was to fuck. But imagine my surprise and pain when I found out that you'd died in childbirth around 9 to 10 months after we'd spent our last night together?" Steve's hold on you became rougher, he pulled you to him and neared your face, "Imagine that y/n, learning that the one person who ever truly loved me, died trying to give birth my child all alone in a bathtub in the middle of nowhere with no one to be there for her in her last moments. I tried to find your and our child's resting place you know, but everywhere I looked all landed in a dead end, because you two were buried in some unmarked grave on a piece of random land that your parents sold after you died. If your brother hadn't confessed what happened to you on his death bed, then I never would've known about any of this." you gasped in pain as Steve's hold on your upper arms became unbearable, Steve held you closely against him, your bump being squished against his hard body.

Steve seemed to be deep in his own mind when you felt a strong kick from the baby, expressing their displeasure at being woken up from how hard Steve was squishing your bump between you two. Steve's eyes widened and his hold on you softened, he pulled back carefully and looked down at your bump. As if on cue, the baby decided to kick again and Steve saw the way your stomach slightly stretch out where the baby had kicked, he carefully placed his right hand over the spot and felt the baby kick a third time. Steve started crying as he fell to his knees and hugged your waist and rested his head on you stomach.

"I'm so sorry y/n, I never should’ve left you or did what I did to you. But I'm back now, and I can fix things, I swear, I'm not gonna let you and our baby die this time." You tried to pull away from Steve but with every attempted tug, he held on tighter and sobbed harder.

"Steve please get up..." You became more uncomfortable, but no matter how confused or scared you were, you also understood that this wasn't your Steve, this Steve was someone else, someone broken and far more dangerous. You had to be careful not to provoke him. Steve stood and hugged you, he buried his nose in you hair and inhaled the smell of your hair.

"I'm gonna make this right y/n, we're gonna be a happy family. Just like we always used to talk about." You didn't say anything, too afraid of this fragile yet dangerous man...all you did was nod slowly and carefully pulled away from him.

"You seem tired, how about we get some rest and talk more about this in the morning, it's getting very late... I understand what you said, but it's just hard to process... there's a spare room upstairs, you must be tired from driving..." You spoke with a soft tone, careful to not trigger the strange Steve, hoping that he would take this is an act of submission and he wouldn't become aggressive like before.

After leading Steve to the spare room, you returned to your room to sleep. As you were about to fall asleep Steve suddenly barged into your room. You'd debated locking your door earlier but decided against it, too afraid of possibly provoking Steve. Before you could question if he needed anything, Steve walked to your bed and climbed in alongside you and pulled you to his chest, resting his chin on the top of your head. "I can't sleep without you, I need to hold you. After everything I-... I refuse to spend another night without you in my arms." As uncomfortable as you felt, your fear greatly outweighed it, so all you did was nod your head and pat Steve's back in hopes of pleasing the stranger with a familiar face. After some time, you felt Steve's breathing even out and you followed him into your own dreamless sleep.

During the middle of the night you woke up with the intense need to pee, as you were carefully untangling yourself from Steve you accidentally woke him up. "What are you doing?" His rough and booming voice scared you.

"The baby is pressing on my bladder, I have to pee..." he hummed and released you from his hold.

"Hurry back." you nodded and headed to the bathroom out in the hall to do your business. After you finished peeing, you noticed the dry feeling in your throat and decided to get some water from the kitchen. While on your way back upstairs from the kitchen you passed the living room and saw the keys to Steve's car, you looked back and forth between the set of keys and the stairs leading up to where Steve slept, unaware of the idea that popped in your head.

You quietly grabbed the keys, slipping on an old pair of shoes that were too big for your feet, you carefully opened the front door as quietly as you could and walked out into the night towards the car. As you were unlocking the car and getting in to try and adjust the seat you saw the living room lights turn on and the front door swing open. Steve face twisted into the most horrendous look of anger you'd ever seen in your many years of being alive. Panicked, you shoved the keys into the emission and started the car.

"Y/n get the fuck out of the car right now and come here before I break your fucking legs." Steve marched his way towards the car, just as he was about to grab onto the car's doorhandles you stepped on the gas and drove away. As your sped away you heard the Steve growl angrily. You didn't know where to go, but you knew that you had to get away from here and closer to civilization. As you were speeding down the road you caught a glimpse of Steve running alongside the car, afraid you tried to press on the gas but that didn't seem to work. Before you knew it, Steve jumped onto the car and yanked off the passenger door handle, you stepped onto the brakes with full force and threw Steve off the car. The car swerved out of control and fell into a ditch, crawling your way out of the car, you felt your left leg shooting with pain, as you looked down at it you saw your bone sticking out. As you laid panting on the side of the road, you placed your arms around your bump and was thankful to feel the baby kicking away to show their unhappiness at the situation. You turned your head when you heard footsteps approaching you, look at the cut up bare feet and all you felt was despair course its way throughout your being, how had Steve survived?

He didn't say anything as he crouched down and pulled up your nightgown to check your stomach, spreading you legs apart to look between your thighs, "There's no bleeding, that's good, means you didn't hurt our baby pulling that dumb stunt of yours." He roughly grabbed your left leg and looked at the bone sticking out, without another word he grabbed your right leg with both his hands and snapped it at the knee, breaking it too, you screamed from the excruciating pain, "I told you I'd break your legs if you didn't listen. This your own fault doll."

Steve stood up and went to open the trunk of the car, "You know, I wanted to keep my words and let you see your family, to let you say your goodbyes before I returned with you despite my displeasure at them for keeping the both of you away from me for two whole months, but now that you've done this, I won't feel any guilt for refusing you your goodbyes." Steve came back with some weird looking clothes in hand, he first put it on himself before he stripped you and put the clothes on you as well. Steve pulled out some weird devices and scooped you into his arms bridal style before the world around you swirled together into weird shapes and colors, blurring together into muddled nonsense before everything went black.

You woke up feeling completely numb, you couldn't feel your arms or legs. The memories of what happened came crashing all at once, causing you to have a bad headache. As you opened your eyes you tried to ask for help, but instead of words rolling off your tongue, you moaned out unintelligible nonsense, alerting the nurse checking your vitals that you were awake.

"Oh, you're awake, I'll go get Captain Rogers, Mr. Stark, and Dr. Banner." The nurse walked away without further explanation and didn't to try and comfort your very clearly distressed self. Not long after she left, Steve and two strange men came into the room.

"The baby's fine, she's got a few broken bones, but considering that you were the one who deliberately caused one, I'd say there’s really not much to worry about. Just monitor her injuries for infection and try to get her some more nutritious food, the tests came back with some slightly worrisome lack of proper vitamins." The man with glasses explained to Steve with a small smile on his face, acting as if this was all normal and Steve purposely breaking one of your legs was a sort of joke between them.

"I had some people move and set up some things for her at your house. Pepper also had a field day with the baby prep stuff, just like when she went on a spree when we had Morgan." The man who spoke had an arm that didn't look human, he was holding a weird piece of glass in his hands spoke without ever bothering to look up from the weird thing in his hands.

"Thank you both, tell the rest of the team I said thanks to them too, everyone has been so helpful." Steve smiled at the two men and walked up to the side of the bed, he caressed your head and bent down to kiss your forehead.

These people were insane, how could they act as is this was normal. "No need to thank us Steve, you deserve some happiness, we all do...we've all been through so much." A woman with red hair suddenly spoke up from the door, she walked over and hugged Steve. "It's good to see you back, some of us worried when you didn't com back sooner."

"Hey Nat, sorry, got held up dealing with some people when I went back." Steve chuckled and shook his head, they all continued to ignore your presence and spoke amongst themselves before they all eventually excused themselves and went off to do their own thing.

"Well doll, those were some very important people, I'm glad you behaved. Bruce and Dr. Cho both gave the OK so we'll be going home after the ultrasound later." You again tried to say something but nothing came out, only a weak and course croaking sound came out. Steve quickly stepped towards you and carefully helped you drink some lukewarm water that was resting on the table beside you. "Sorry doll, your throat must be so dry."

After drinking some water with Steve's help you took a few deep breaths and looked up at him, "Where are we?" Your words so soft that it could've been mistaken for the wind blowing through the window.

"We're in the compound's hospital suite, after the OBGYN finishes giving one last ultrasound we can head home." Steve smiled down at you with a glint of a crazed look at the back of his eyes. He sat on a chair beside your bed and held your hand in his, he kissed your knuckles, drawing your attention to where he kissed you saw a shiny ring on your ring finger. "After the baby is born and you've completely healed, we can hold a beautiful ceremony. For now just focus on getting better doll." You realized what he meant and scrunch up your face is disgust, how could he expect you to marry him after all that he's done to you.

"I want to go home Steve...please...I'm sorry...please just let me go home..." you didn't know what else to do besides plead for Steve to let you go home.

"I know doll, we'll go home after they check on the baby one last time." He smiled at you reassuringly, clearly not understanding what you meant by home. Before you could correct him and explain, a woman came in with a strange machine contraption, she introduced herself as being a doctor and explained that she was going do something weird so that you could somehow see your baby on the machine, you didn't understand what she was saying but Steve kept nodding and seemed to understand everything. The doctor moved exposed your belly, she placed a weird substance on it and used an odd object to push along and spread the substance around your belly. The machine showed weird shapes as she moved the object around, she smiled and stopped when a big weird shape that looked slightly human-like showed on the machine. She turned and touched some things on the machine before the room was filled with the sound of a loud steady beating.

"That is your baby on the screen and their heartbeat sounds very strong." Steve had tears in his eyes as he held your hand and looked at the shape on the machine, you didn't fully understand, but you did understand that you were looking at your baby and you were hearing their heartbeat. The doctor moved the object and pushed into your stomach slightly as if searching for something and faced to you when she did find whatever it was that she was looking for, "Congratulations, you're having a boy Mr and Mrs. Rogers." she continued explaining more and talked with Steve for a bit, but you drowned out their conversation, all you could focus on was the news she'd given you. When you came back to, the doctor had cleaned everything up and was saying her goodbyes as she left.

Steve carefully helped you put on a loose dress and carried you onto a wheelchair that a nurse had brought in after the doctor left, he wheeled you past strange rooms filled with even stranger things. After placing you in a weird yet comfortable car, Steve drove you through a city covered in large screens that displayed odd images with vibrant colors, people wore weird clothes as he drove past them. Steve did not seem phased at any of this, acting as if this was all normal to him, "I know, it can be overwhelming at first doll, but don't worry too much about getting used to it, we won't be surrounded by all this at the house." You wanted to say something, ask all the questions that tornado'ed around in your mind..but you were left speechless and overwhelmed. As Steve continued to drive, you slowly felt the hum of the car moving lull you to sleep.

"Come on doll, I know you must be so exhausted, but you gotta wake up and eat some food." Steve's soft voice woke you up, this time when you looked around, you saw that you were in a room full of sharp looking objects, there was no warmth around. "I know, everything looks very monochrome and modern, but that's just Tony's style, we can get stuff and decorate the house more to your liking after you get better." Steve carefully helped you sit up on the soft bed and hand fed you food he blew on to chill.

You closed your mouth and turned your head, refusing to eat the weird food that he was trying to feed you. "Steve...where are we...I want to go home, I don't know what’s going on and why you're doing this or what I've done, but please just take me home. I don't know what you want, but I'll try to give it to you...please...just let me go home...I wanna see my family..." you cried as you finally managed to voice your pleas to Steve. He let out a frustrated sigh and placed the food on the table beside the bed.

"Y/n, you are home. I'm doing this for us, I know I hurt you with how I left, but I'm doing my best to make it up to you alright? I travelled through time just to bring you to the future so that we could have the life we always dreamed of. As for your family...that is your own fault, if you'd just listened to me then I would've let you see them and say your goodbyes, but instead you decided to put yourself and our baby in danger. Please stop crying and looking at me as if I'm a monster, I'm doing this for us, for our little family." Steve placed his hand on your bump and caressed it lovingly, "When I first came out of the ice and realized that I'd lost nearly 70 years, I felt lost and broken. Then after I managed to learn and adapt, I looked for answers. When I learned that Peggy had lived happily without me, I felt defeated, I'd saved the country and countless lives, but it cost me my own life and happiness. While I grieved the lost of Peggy, I had a dream of you one night. After that dream I remembered how I'd broken your heart and wondered what'd happened to you, so I searched for answers...at first every lead I had led to a dead end, it was as if you'd disappeared off the face of the earth...that was until I found out that your brother William was still alive, I eventually managed to arrange a visit with him and told him we were old friends in school, that we'd bonded because of our loser statuses and he opened up like red sea did for Moses. He told me about how your parents sent you away to live on a farm all alone after your family had found out you were pregnant after getting raped. He told me about how your brother John always drove back and forth between home and the farm house, how overtime John became frustrated and irritated that he was always the one who had to drive back and forth, he told me about how you would never talk about your rape, how John became suspicious that you knew who it was and was trying to protect their identity. William wept as he told me about how John had refused to come see you after you'd refused to talk to him about who had assaulted you. He barely managed to make out the explanation of how John and him found you dead and covered in your own blood, you’d died trying to give birth in a cold bathtub, all alone. How John blamed himself for refusing to drive to check up on you, William also detailed to me about how the guilt ate at John until he couldn't live with himself anymore and he took his own life as well.".

Steve reached out for your left hand and played with the shiny ring he'd placed on your finger without your permission, "When I asked where you and our baby was buried, William just stared off and said that he couldn't remember, that your family had buried you in what used to be the garden of flowers before you parents sold the old farm off to a company. When he couldn't grasp why I was so invested in what happened to you, I revealed to him the truth. That I'd been the one who raped you, I told him everything and I watched as your brother died of anger, frustration, and heartache. I could've called for a nurse or doctor, but I didn't I watched him die a slow, pained, and guilt-filled death. What I did to you wasn't right, but how your family casted you away and left you and our unborn child to die alone in a cold bathtub in the middle of nowhere was worst." You trembled and tried to pry your hand away from Steve's hold but he just clicked his tongue and continued to play with your fingers.

"I lived in regret, you'd spent your life loving me...truly loving me, and I'd thrown that away for someone who couldn't even wait a proper mourning period for me...but you, you died trying to bring a piece of me into this world..." Steve was beyond delusion, you hadn't gone through the pregnancy for him. Steve had built this narrative of his own, he believed that you'd died trying to birth a part of him so you could stay close to him, when in reality, it was simply because this was YOUR child who you loved, not because it was Steve's.

Before you could correct him, Steve went on, "When Tony found a way to go back to the past it hadn't even crossed my mind to use it to come back to you, in fact when I saw Peggy again I'd forgotten all about you, the old feelings of what I felt for her came rushing back...when I went back to return the stone to her timeline, I had planned to stay with her, but I saw that she had already moved on and I was beyond furious until I remembered you and our baby..." Steve released your hand and began to caress where your baby was starting to kick, "I came back and explained everything to the team, they all agreed that I deserved my happy ending too, so I traveled to the past one last time, this time it was to bring you two home, to save you two from your untimely deaths."

You didn't know if Steve somehow delusionally believed that his explanation was supposed to woo you, but you did know that it did just the opposite of that. "But your family was so selfish, they'd refused to tell me where you were, and when I'd confessed that I was the father of your child, they refused even more...so I did what I do best, I beat it out of them. It took your family two long months before William cracked after I threatened his precious Jenny. Despite how annoyed I was with them for keeping us apart for even longer, I was still willing to let you say goodbye and see them one last time before I brought you back to the future with me...but then you just had to pull that dumb stunt with the car..." Steve looked up at you and smiled smugly. "Y/n, this is home now. We'll be happy here, you can never leave me, you don't know anything about the future, and I plan to keep it that way. I'll never let you go now that I've finally got you back."

Steve climbed on top of you as he revealed your future to you. You tried to move away from him but stop when he purposely put pressure on your broken legs, "Don't provoke me y/n..." In a swift move, Steve tore off the blanket that separated you from him. Like a crazed animal he ripped off the loose dress you still wore, "God, I wanted to wait until you healed, but it's been so long since I've been in you doll." Steve squeezed your breasts with no remorse, your breasts leaked and squirted milk everywhere. Steve moaned loudly at the sight, he bent down and began to suck on your right nipple, drinking as if he'd been deserted for days without water. Just when you thought he was going to stop after he released your right nipple from his mouth, Steve began to suck and bite your left nipple as well, coaxing your breasts to continue feeding him its nectar.

Steve's hands roamed you body, rubbing their way all over until one of his hands wandered its way between your thighs and found the very sensitive nub you always tried to avoid touching after accidentally brushing over it once when you were showering. You thrashed you body around, trying to remove his hand from it, "Do you know what this is doll?" Steve gripped your hip and forced you still with his left hand as his right thumb rubbed circles around the nub between your thighs, "This is your clit...god you don't even know all the things I'm gonna do to you, if you thought what we used to do as teens was good, then you're gonna die of bliss from what I'll do to you tonight."

You felt your body grow warmer as an unknown feeling bundled at the pit of your stomach near your bladder. Steve continued to rub your 'clit' and ignored your pleas for him to stop, you began panting harder and harder, trying to catch your breath as the bundle of nerves near your bladder threatened to break loose. Steve bent his head and bit down on your right nipple, throwing you over the edge and breaking the bundle of nerves loose. Your back arched up, thrusting your breasts up towards Steve as your breasts both squirted and leaked milk everywhere and your thighs shook violently as the bundle of nerves near your bladder broke, you sobbed in humiliation as you felt and believed that you had just urinated on the bed. Steve moaned loudly and brought his right hand up to examine it, his hand was covered in a clear substance. You knew that the liquid like goo on his hand had come from your outburst, and to your utter shock, Steve licked and sucked his hand clean. "Fuck, doll, you taste to fucking good." You covered your eyes, refusing to look at Steve after what he just did to you. "Ah, ah, ah...what a bad girl...don't you dare look away from me." Steve grabbed your hands and roughly tied them behind your back with his belt, you hadn't even realized that he'd taken off his pants and shirt while his was drinking your breastmilk.

Steve lifted you like a rag doll and made you sit on his lap, your back on his front and making you face a big screen that was on the wall at the foot of the bed. "Jarvis, replay the footage of y/n cumming." After Steve spoke to no one, the screen suddenly lit up and displayed you sobbing and moaning lewdly as your back arched and spread breast milk everywhere. "See that doll? God you look so fucking gorgeous cumming like such a cock-hungry whore." As As horrified as you felt from watching yourself on the screen, you also couldn't concentrate because of Steve's hand that was once again rubbing your 'clit'. Steve slid two of his fingers inside you, making you throw your head back from the feeling of being stuffed with something after neglecting your needs for so long. "Jarvis, display live footage." the screen switched to you sitting on top of Steve who had his fingers pumping in and out of you and his thumb rubbed your clit. Steve used his free hand to force you to look at the screen. "Look at yourself doll, what a lovely whore you are...keep your eyes on the screen as I make you come again." Steve curled his two fingers inside of you and pressed up against a sensitive patch inside of you and made you watch the screen as you once again screamed out like a whore in heat and arched your back, breasts leaking and squirting milk all over your bulging stomach and broken legs that were both wrapped in casts. You held onto Steve's forearms in hopes of stopping him, but this seemed to just fuel him further. "That doll, was your g-spot." Steve laughed manically as he moved his hand from your jaw down to your throat, he began to squeeze harder, closing up your airway. As you became more light headed Steve licked you tear off your cheeks and removed his fingers from inside you to roughly pinch your clit, your body tried to jerk away but Steve ignored it and aligned his cock it at your pussy hole that was twitching from cumming twice. "Watch as I fuck you, watch as your greedy cunt stretches and swallows up my big cock. Just like it did the night I raped our baby into you."

You watched in horror as Steve tightened his hold on your throat, completely cutting off your airway as he thrust his cock all the way into you all in one go and pulled on your clit with the fingers that was pinching it. Your body spasmed and you saw nothing but stars as you cummed harder than the last two times, the feeling was so intense that the world went black for a bit before your regain consciousness and saw that Steve holding your hips to fuck you up and down his cock, treating you like the nickname he always called you...doll. "Fuck that as so hot, I can't wait to fuck another baby into you doll." Steve grunted and shoved you down onto him so hard that you felt in crush against and nearly past your cervix, even though you had just woke up, you found yourself cumming again. Steve moaned loudly as he came inside you, painting your insides with his cum.

Steve let go of your hips and your fell back against him, unable to move a single muscle or bone in your body. You saw yourself on the screen panting for air like a dog. Steve wrapped his arms around you and carefully caressed your bump, he kissed the top of your head lovingly, "I love you so much y/n, I can't believe we can finally live the rest of our lives together, just like we used to talk about..."

...

Goodbye all 🫡 now for me to go drown myself in some holy water and fall off the face of the Earth again...

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