Every time I see an exclusionist on here and I click their profile theyāre like 17 or 19 or maybe 21 at best.Ā
And thatās fair- itās not like people that age canāt have opinions or be right, theyāre people.
But when I think about how long it took me to work out my own damn sexuality, gender, and all that crap, and how gently I stepped once I realised I was queer, and how much listening to people I did to see who the hell was out thereā¦how much I am STILL learning about people who have different experiencesā¦
ā¦it feels really odd to see people this young being so secure in their belief of who should be excluded from the community.Ā
Not how to support and include, to help and support, but how to exclude.
Likeā¦being confident in your own sexuality at 19? Fuck yeah, good for you, Iām happy you had a better chance and an earlier start than I did.
Butā¦ telling other people theyāre not queer enough to be inĀ āyourā space?
Your space? Not mine anymore? Huh.
Iām over here at 35 still listening and learning and trying to understand everyoneās perspectives, discovering that sexuality is even more complex and nuanced than I knowā¦and all these people barely out of their teens are talking like they know everything there is to know about being LGBT, ever. Like itās all been written down, stamped, sealed, confirmed by some Authority.
Mmmm. No. Justā¦ have an ounce of humility. Try gaining some perspective, please.
You havenāt lived long enough to even really listen to real life aces, to really think about what LGBT means. I donāt mean this as an ageist insult, I just really think that this kind of shit deserves TIME- hell I know it deserves time and thought because I am STILL unlearning bad assumptions and behaviours, and STILL meeting people who define themselves outside of the frame that I was once taught meantĀ āLGBTā.
And you, a teen raised in a world thatās still pretty fucking homophobic and doesnāt recognise half of what the LGBT community itself has taken years to acknowledge, you think you know it all?
Because youāre online?
While youāre here, read some posts where ace people talk about how theyāre treated. Forget semantics for a while: read the experiences.
Iām online too, I have been for some time. Doesnāt make me right, but experience is of some value. Experience in listening to queer people who arenāt quite like me, that is, in trying to understand how I am similar, instead of trying to figure out how they do not belong. In how people rework things, figure out how they can be less harmful, more inclusive, more representative of all those who are marginalised.
See, Q is queer but also often Questioning. Itās still important to let people be Questioning, there is an astounding amount of queerphobia in the world and we are NOT done working out the labels. We may never be.
Not so long ago, the T in lgbt was under question. Bisexuals are still being excluded.Ā
So Iām being told I donāt matter by people who werenāt even born yet when I realised I wasnāt straight. Theyāre skipping right over all the reflection and going straight to self-affirmation by exclusion.Ā
Which, again- if you are born into a world where you never have to question your identity, oh good grief I hope thatās real for everyone some day.
But weāre not there yet, yanno? And I resent being told that after all these years of soul-searching and careful, very careful questioning of whether I belong and how I can be a good member of the community, people arrive so 100% certain of their claim to being LGBT that the first thing they do is try to kick others out.
tl;dr I was here first and Iām not amused.
blakekathryn
germansingergirl
areudirty
dededos
izzy806
tangentwithtanner
baratheonpilled
ellievsbear
yousharknotpass
