One of Them Rowdy Bois™

♡Calhoun or Cal | 22 | he/they | pansexual♡ Just a simple forest cryptid Icon by aesphantasmal

[escuerzoresucitado]

[thyfleshc0nsumed]

You own the home you live in. The last owners painted the walls of your bedroom a horrible off white.

You fucking hate it. Every day you wake up to off-white walls and off-white ceilings and pass through your off-white door to get to the rest of the house. You feel like you've been locked up in a padded room. It makes you want to die.

So what is there to do? Well, you own the home. Go out and get some paint, a roller or two, and a drop cloth. If the color makes you want to kill yourself, you should obviously change it.

But what if you didn't hate it. What if it just mildly perturbed you? Or maybe what if you didn't, like, reeeeeally mind it all that much, but you knew that another color would make you a lot happier? Does the decision that you come to change?

Sure, it's work moving the furniture out, setting up, painting, making sure you get the edges, cleaning up, letting it all dry, etc, but isn't adding joy to your life worth the effort? Don't you owe it to yourself to subtract mediocrity and add happiness? Do you need to be miserable to envision a better life?

[thyfleshc0nsumed]

Anyway all that to say go start those hormones. You don't have to hate yourself to think of a happier life

[r0zeclawz]

tucks you in and kisses your forehead then shows you my knuckle tats that say SEEP TITE

[xenosagaepisodeone]

youtube should give viewers the option to grade video essays like it's a high school english class assignment and if the median grade is below passing then they stick a huge png over your video advising that this is a vlog with slide show components. if the youtuber ever goes "umm. I'm not going to attempt to pronounce this" at any point then they're genetically altered to be able to survive underground and let loose in an endless series of catacombs built beneath their home to live the rest of their life as the fabled town troll.

[aloyhh]

forced to say “it’s ok” instead of throwing a chair at them

[skelkankaos2]

"how do you tell the difference between a whippet and an italian greyhound" simple. look at it head on. if it looks like a dog it's a whippet. if it's making a face like you've just threatened it with a firearm, it's an iggy

[skelkankaos2]

see? simple as

[ryan-sometimes]

Jake and Logan Paul are the Wario and Waluigi versions of the Da Vinki twins.

[orcboxer]

Things that work in fiction but not real life

torture getting reliable information out of people

knocking someone out to harmlessly incapacitate them for like an hour

jumping into water from staggering heights and surviving the fall completely intact

calling the police to deescalate a situation

rafting your way off a desert island

correctly profiling total strangers based on vibes

effectively operating every computer by typing and nothing else

ripping an IV out of your arm without consequences

heterosexual cowboy

[orcboxer]

This post breaching containment has taught me that a lot of people seem to think they can accurately profile complete strangers. For the record, no the fuck you can't.

[funnelcloudd]

Not to sound like a fuckin hippie but please for the love of god start noticing and appreciating the natural world around you. You don’t have to go hike the entire Appalachian trail or anything and I get that not everyone has access to the outdoors for various reasons, but just fucking … look around you when you’re outside. Notice the sky and the sun and the birds and creatures. Start caring about them. I’m begging you.

[aetherglade]

We are the universe experiencing itself. All life is important. You have an inner universe waiting to be actualized. Take the next step then keep going.

[toskarin]

shadow the hedgehog is cool. gunblades are cool. vampires are cool. scythes are cool. white hair is cool. we need to stop lying about what is not cool

[luminous-warrior]

[onlytiktoks]

[alexaloraetheris]

@elodieunderglass At NO POINT in this video did I know what was going to happen next

[elodieunderglass]

Oh wow. Thank you so much for thinking of me!!

[forcekenobi]

as a child being told "the moon controls the tides" with no additional explanation was like. oh okay. you want me to believe in magic? you're talking about magic right now? okay. fine

[forcekenobi]

sorry. only semi-related but i simply wasn't ready for "the sun is a distant gorilla". thank you NASA

[hyperchaotix]

[icarus-suraki]

[evilwizard]

all ive ever asked for is infinite power, the ability to control bugs with my mind, 5 trillion dollars, and the answer to every secret in the multiverse. i don’t think that’s unreasonable

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

[protectspock]

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

excuse me

[protectspock]

Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.

[dct239394cvvd098dffgggp]

its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way

[0ssim0r0]

Ossimoro

[obscureoldguy]

FREE PILLOW FIGHTS!

[kreature-ofthenight]

I love that most people once they realized what was happening just went full Berserk mode without a care

also the man dropping his walking cane to have an anime like elder master reveal

[perforatedsanity]

This wonderful human is bringing so much joy into the world. He’s reminding people they’re allowed to play. That they can be silly in public. That fun can come in unexpected places and at unexpected times. I wish I knew who he was. I’d donate so he could buy more pillows and bring more fun into the world - once it’s safe enough to.

[blackpyrefly]

i want to masturbate but i cant afford the name brand stuff so im always jakeing off and busting a rut and shit

[blackpyrefly]

such base indulgences are beneath me

[blackpyrefly]

now if youll excuse me. back to meating off.

[staff]

for april fools we’re deleting this entire site sayonara you weeaboo shits