My heart has a habit of comforting my demons.
thevalsworldlove (via wnq-writers)
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty
Cosimo Galluzzi
wallacepolsom
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
ojovivo
trying on a metaphor
occasionally subtle
will byers stan first human second
Today's Document

⁂
taylor price
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Claire Keane
Peter Solarz

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blake kathryn

oozey mess
One Nice Bug Per Day
seen from Morocco

seen from T1
seen from Mexico
seen from Netherlands

seen from United States

seen from Germany
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from India

seen from United States

seen from Malaysia
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from T1

seen from United States

seen from United States
@boydsbible
My heart has a habit of comforting my demons.
thevalsworldlove (via wnq-writers)
update.
so i might have done the thing and updated this blog. you know, just in case.
“We cannot tear out a single page of our life, but we can throw the whole book in the fire.” ― George Sand, Mauprat
Boy, we get a dollar thirty five a day plus free chow and smokes. A goddamn paid European vacation. Best job I ever had.
I promise you one day, flowers will grow from these scars with their roots twisting deep. I’ll show you that even in the most broken of places, life finds a way.
Breathless.
Emotional drabbles
Tiredbones couldn’t really stop Eloise from working and it was when herCaptain had dismissed her rather angrily did she finally manage toscuffle out of the field hospital that had been, for once, in anactual building instead of a flimsy canvas tent that bent and bowedwith every harsh breeze that managed to sweep across the plains.
Insidethe hospital it had been stagnant and hot, which was why she wasactually wearing her button up seersucker for once, though for themost part they were impractical when working in the field. But, giventheir luck and the increasingly warmer nights, they were allowed towear them again. Eloise always hated them and she looked forward toripping it off once she made it into her small personal tent thatonly COs got while the others slept in shabby cots in massive tentsas if they were at some sort of summer camp. No, she had hers all theherself, and while it wasn’t fancy, just a cot, table, chair, andlantern, it was a sanctuary she had been grateful for the moment shewas told she got one. Long gone were the days of sleeping on thefloor and listening to men scream and moan throughout the night towhere she had to get up and go check on them. Of course, if she wasneeded, they’d come and get her no matter what time ti was, and shewould always be eager and happy to do it, but at that moment she wasjust needing a little bit of R&R, which was why she booked it toher tent.
Theground was soft in most spots, the lack of rain helping dry up themud that surrounded everyone all the time, but for the most part, itwas still pretty damn muddy. Thankfully she had chosen to wear herarmy issued boots despite it looking fairly odd with her seersucker.But hey, she thought, this was war, not a fashion show.
Lickingher lips, she could still taste the faint speckles of blood from apatient she had taken care of earlier who had gotten hit so bad thatblood shot out with every heartbeat. He didn’t make it, as she knew,but they all gave it a shot. Years ago, when she first arrived, thiswould have scared her, caused her to vomit even, but now she was soused to having other people’s blood in her system that she was sureher DNA had changed in some way.
Stompingup to her tent, she unpinned her hair, letting it fall loosely aroundher shoulders as she moved the flap aside, stepping in and toeing hershoes off at the entrance, taking some weird sense of pride in whereshe slept, not wanting the makeshift wooden flooring to be dirtied byher muddy boots. Furrowing her brow, she felt something was off, shewasn’t alone, and the muddied footprints by her entrance way was adead giveaway. If she had a gun, she’d easily pull it out just tostartled the other person, but this could only be one person, it wasIrwin Wade, her drinking buddy.
“Youbetter have brought alcohol-” Eloise spun around with a grin, butit faltered quickly as she saw Boyd sitting at her desk, his muddiedboots sitting on the corner of it, his long legs caked in dried mud.The man was picking blood and dirt from out of his fingernails withan army knife.
“Thefuck do you want?” Eloise asked angrily, furrowing her brow. Had henot gotten the hint yet?
“Shutyour trap and I’ll show you,” he said gruffly, looking up at herand tossing his knife onto the table as she rose from leaning back inthe metal seat, its legs vibrating against her feet as it hit thefloor. The man breathed in deep as she stood, his height suddenlythat of mythical proportions as he walked closer to her until therewas barely any space between the pair.
Eloisecould smell the dried and damp earth on his clothes and against hisskin, her eyes bouncing in between large hazel eyes that bore throughher, always making her nervous, as if her emotions and nerves wereexposed. They were large, bright, beautiful, occasionally tinted withtears, but not tonight. Tonight they looked more sinister, dark,sinful. The woman shrank in his shadow as she found herselfsidestepping him until she moved far away from him and further intoher tent. This meant nothing to Boyd, in fact it probably was goingto make his snide commentary and preaching easier to do.
Thegirl suddenly felt nervous, her hands starting to shake as her heartraced and her mind jumped from one scenario to another. She glancedover her shoulder to see the knife was nearby, but he wasn’t going tohurt her. Right?
Whippingher head back to face the man, she gasped silently to find he hadclosed the space between them once more, except this time the toe oftheir boots touched and his face was a hair away from her own. Headvanced forward, but she didn’t retreat back, besides if she triedshe’d be on top of her table and that would not be a good position tobe in.
Fora long moment he stood there in front of her, his eyes scanning herface. Her own eyes followed what his did, trying to think of wherethey fell as they moved within their socket. She swore he looked ather angular jaw, her cheeks, her nose, her forehead, eyebrows, nose,even looked down at what she was wearing. She could’ve been wrong,but she knew she wasn’t, she knew where a man looked and knew thatlook a man gave. Those dark orbs were filled with something otherthan tears and wiseness, they were filled with…something primal.She swallowed hard and drew in a shallow breath as she felt him leanin, their eyes locking.
Eloisewanted to look away, but she couldn’t, it was like watching a trainwreck. Her eyes suddenly scanned his face just as he had done secondsbefore, searching his face and expression for some indication as towhat he wanted, what he needed, but the longer she stared, the moreconfused she became. She had seen his face many times before, saw himpraying over people, fought with the man almost daily or whenever hewas around, but this time it was different. It were almost as if shehad seen him before someplace else, someplace far away from Europeand war. Those eyes resonating something familiar and that caused herstomach to twist and turn.
“Boyd,”Eloise said lowly, almost inaudibly. It had been the first time shesaid his name and that made her heart skip a beat. Again, sheswallowed and gasped for breath.
Shelooked out of the corner of her eye as she watched him lift a hand upto touch a strand of her chocolate colored hair, stroking it. Therewas a familiarity as if he had done that before, but she didn’t havethe time or the means to contemplate on it.
Dirtyhands moved from a few strands into the entire mess of natural curls,raking his fingers deep within them, gently tugging them as if tomassage her scalp. Eloise could barely breathe as he did so, unsureof what to do. It felt good, however, really good actually. His eyesclashed with her own and she suddenly felt that primal instinct jumpfrom him into her. The lone lantern in the room made his featuresglow, made them softer, caused his hazel eyes to glow brightly.
“Doesthis make you uncomfortable?” the man asked and for a moment Eloisewasn’t even sure what that meant. What were words? Whatwas…anything? Logical thought was being clouded by something else,something she rarely gave thought to: lust.
Sheshook her head ‘no’ meekly and all they did was stand there insilence, staring into each other’s eyes while one of his hands cuppedthe back of her head. As if the world tilted on its axis and thestars aligned perfectly, there was moment they were both in tune tothe other and, in clumsy haste, she threw her arms around his neckand kissed him, while his other hand went to her mid-back, pullingher into him until her entire body was flush with his own. Eloisetilted her head to one side, the man the other, their lips clashingso roughly it were almost as if they were trying to devour the other.She parted inflamed lips and slowly slid her tongue against thesurprisingly soft lips, tasting dirt against them. Together, theywidened their mouths, tongues colliding animalistically, massagingand rolling together as Boyd’s hand gripped her hair tightly, but notin a way that would cause harm. His other hand moved down her back,grabbing her ass and gripping it tightly, tugging it until he let go,letting it fall.
Hiseager hands were matched by her own as she panted between thepassionate kisses, feeling his lips move from her own to trail downher neck. Eloise let her head fall back slightly as her eyes rolledback in pleasure as she found herself tugging at the shirt he hadtucked into his pants.
Theirbodies bumping into each other, he took a step forward and she a stepback, bumping into the corner of the table where she bowed backwardas his weight pushed against her. The hand that had grabbed her nowmoved up her back, around her side, and up her stomach and torso,gripping her small right breast, squeezing gently and massaging it,which only made the woman give out a faint moan of satisfaction. Henibbled her neck, obviously showing his expertise in these matters.His lips hushed her and he bent his knees slightly to pick her up andsit her down on the edge of that shaky table. Boyd grabbed the backof Eloise’s right knee and pulled it up to hook against his hip,letting the calloused and rough fingers glide against her smooth andvirginal skin, never in her life having been touched like the waythis man touched her.
Itwere almost as if she were an instrument and he knew how to play herperfectly, reaching that free hand up her thigh before moving it intothe inner side. Her legs trembled at the touch, his mouth biting herneck and sucking, her mouth parted to gasp for breath as she dared tolook down to find what he was doing. She bit her lower lip as shefelt nimble fingers come to a stop where her panties were. For amoment she was glad that he didn’t take it any further, but she waswrong. The palm of his hand cupped in between her legs, the mangiving a muffled moan as his lips still trailed all around her neck.
Slowlyhe moved his hand, his middle finger taking control as he found herclit, rolling the pad of his fingertip around it. She could feelherself throbbing, the blood rushing to that one area where hepleasured her. Eloise clung onto him with her left arm thrown overhis shoulder, fingers digging into his back while the other grippedthe side of the desk. She panted, wanting to make noises, but shewasn’t exactly sure if she should or if that was even normal.Whatever it was he was doing, it was intense and satisfactory, but itonly got better when she felt his fingers dip in between her panties,easily finding the wet heat that emanated from within, a fingersliding deep inside of her that caused her to give out a yelp, herbody shifting and her grip on the man becoming so tight that sheswore she was going to break nails. These things seemed to make theman happy as he laughed as he lifted his head to look lock eyes, hismouth slightly agape as he moved his finger in and out of the wetorifice. He panted, just as she did, and his eyes fell to her lipswhere they soon kissed once more, her body doing things she didn’tthink was possible, such as her hips waving, moving against histouch. She wanted to do something, she couldn’t just sit there andlet this happen. What could she do aside from moan and buck her hipsinto him? Could she touch him?
Eloisewas going to find out, a sexual awakening happening within her. Herown hand that tugged his shirt moved to his pants. She moved both herhands down to fumble with his belt, wanting to touch him, wanting toknow what it felt like. He didn’t resist, in fact he moved closer,and she could hear the belt buckle clank as it was undone. Venturinginto uncharted territory, Eloise shoved her dominant hand down intohis pants and was caught off guard by the warm and lengthy part ofBoyd she swore she’d never see or feel in all her life.
Herlips moved against his own as she gently grabbed his cock, feelinghow smooth and hard it was, but before she could do much of anythingelse, someone walked into the tent, their heavy footfalls causingboth of them to separate, Eloise jumping off the table and tuggingher seersucker down, Boyd keeping his back turned to the person whilebuckling himself up.
“Lieutenant,uh…Corporal…?” the awkwardness in the man’s voice probablycould’ve been heard a million miles away. “Uh, Lieutenant…I’lljust meet you outside.”
Themoment the medic walked out of the tent did Eloise realize what justhappened. Anger took over as she buttoned herself up and glanced overat the mustached man. Pursing her lips, she brushed her fingersthrough her hair and simply composed herself before standing shoulderto shoulder with Boyd.
“Don’tcome into my tent anymore,” she said icily. Looking sideways athim, she felt that icy exterior melt momentarily before she reacheddown and grabbed his hand, feeling his cold gold ring against herhands. She squeezed it tightly once before dropping it and heading tothe mouth of the tent.
“Nota word about this,” she said lowly, breathless. “See you.”
"It's okay."
comfort don ;;
his breaths are HEAVY– too great for his lungs to be able to SUPPORT them. in essence, he’s hyperventilating a bit, but he’s trying to keep it down low, so nobody takes notice; that ends up with him on one side of FURY, back pressed against the metal, with a shaky hand trying to bring a ciga- rette to his lips, while the other balls into a tight FIST.
and he must not have done a good job at concealing bec-acuse before he knows it BIBLE has made his way back &has taken it upon himself to recite a verse or two to helpdon back into his head. but obviously, he’s not paying att-ention, mainly because he can’t sustain enough OXYGEN to do so– and that’s when he feels arms around him, and the other man’s voice tickling his ear. out of habit he tenses up, but his half-trembling hand ends up dropping the CIGARETTE, and his lips emit a small gasp of air. he feels safe enough with bible to actually let his body slump a moment, and for his head to drop on the brunette’s shoulder, only lightly.
“It’s OKAY.”, he repeats, in efforts to comfort himself.
On Faith Alone | eloiseclarke
Apologize you asshole! He hasn’t done a damn thing to you! Eloise’s conscience was trying to get the better of her as she stood there starting at a pair of hazel eyes that could have made anyone do a double take. The handsome and prominent features of this man were a shame, Eloise had thought. Such a handsome man to have been in such an ugly situation, and doing something she found to be repulsive. The woman didn’t know why she cared so much, gave a damn about what he did or found comfort in, but she just knew that she didn’t want it around her, yet at that point in time she was surrounded by it.
Prejudicial was something she had been all her life, a trait she probably had picked up from her parents and something that got worse with the war and all that she had seen, but she knew there wasn’t a reason for her anger towards this holy man. But yet, Eloise was finding a way to dislike him, finding reasons, and feeding off the negativity that she felt deep inside of her that had little to do with him. Did he give her his name? Eloise couldn’t remember, but all she could think to call him was holy man and for the time being that was what he was.
His words did nothing but make her more angry, bitter even. There was a sense of jealousy that overwhelmed her in that moment as her eyes bounced from him to the man who now lay dead on the cot. He had been able to give comfort, bring a sense of calm to the man who she had been in charge of. That pissed her off. It was the one thing she had left in this world, one job, one thing that people counted on her for, and here this mustachioed holy man waltzed into her tent like it were nothing and replaced her. Jealous. That was why she was disliking him, but not only because he was able to do her job. No, this man had something she had lost long ago, something that meant more than the world, her faith. She was now faithless, eyes opened, no longer blinded by the supernatural being in the sky who worked their magic. That, too, she realized was another reason she hated this man. Other than those two things, she couldn’t figure out why else she’d have such strong feelings, but she was sure she could think of something given the right moment.
“Did we!?” Eloise cocked an eyebrow at the man’s statement, her face expressing no emotion as she stared, although her hands kept rubbing against her trousers. “I saw a man die writhing in pain. I don’t know what the hell you just saw.”
Glancing to the dead soldier momentarily, she shook her head, as if to say this loss they just encountered was a shame, which in truth it was. Every life lost here was a shame. Eloise moved her brown eyes over to the holy man, wanting to give a laugh, but she somehow managed to stay stoic.
“There was nothing mysterious about this,” she explained. “He lost a lot of blood, had piece of his brain sticking out of a his skull. He was bound to die. People see some crazy things when they die. Say thing that are even more crazy. They have people like you, however, to try and somehow make sense of it all when, in reality, you’re just saying things that make them feel better. Nobody wants to hear that they are going to die, that this is it, that it is over. We wanna hear that we are going to close our eyes and wake up anew, in a field of fucking poppies and kittens.
“Your very presence here is trying to prove a point, Holy Man. Trying to show that people can be saved. Let me tell you, we don’t need that shit here.”
The gunner wasn’t sure how someone, so soon after watching someone had died, could be so accusatory and condescending in their words. Then again, he knew that she wasn’t playing around, that she fully believed that her powers were stronger than the great Lord’s above and he could understand why, after the man had so desperately reached for his faith and not the nurse beside him, she was so passed off by that fact.
Boyd never was one to look down on non-believers, however. If he had, his relationships in the tank probably wouldn’t exist considering half of them didn’t believe in nothing, and those who did only followed the good book loosely, if at all. But he didn’t hold it against them. He only thought that they were in some desperate need of guidance and reassurance in the Lord’s holy ways, something which he figured he could offer them somehow.
She was just the same. She was a child of God who had somehow gotten lost along the way, probably due to the war and all the horrors of what it could do to a man. It was hard to face that every day and he didn’t blame her for it. She had just given up to early. Rested her faith in something else. And now, as he watched the features of the woman in front of him contort into some angry rage, he couldn’t help but shift on his feet slightly before shoving his hands back into the pockets of his jacket.
“Yes we did,” he said proudly, his words oozing with confidence as he spoke. And as she continued, his shoulders just moved up and down into a lazy shrug before he offered her a little bit more of his piece of mind. “I saw a man who was in pain but who was calmed down by the strength of prayer. True it ain’t the best way to die, but at least he had the Lord by his side and in his mind.”
When she lectured him, he only tilted his head to the side slightly, his eyes bearing into her as he barely blinked, just listened to the words coming out of her mouth. It was nothing short of garbage, all of it, but he listened regardless. Until she insulted him. Boyd couldn’t help the laugh that came out next as he shook his head at the mention of him only being there to prove a point, shaking his head as he took a step in closer to the woman, his words getting sharper as he spoke.
“The day these men stop askin’ for God is the day I’ll stop hangin’ around. You let me know when that happens, hm?”
✓
See my muses reaction
Theplace was packed, far more packed than normal and Eloise could onlyassume it was because the last few tanks had finally made it into thecamp and everyone was ready for some hot chow, though soupconsistency with chunks of stuffdidn’t really constitute a stew as they were passing it off to bed.
Itwas her unfortunate timing that the last person she had to take careof had needed a little extra care, not that she minded none in theleast, but by the time she walked to the tent that was serving hotfood, she realized she’d be standing on her feet again, as she hadthe past two days. Eventually, she thought, her ankles were going tobreak or her bones were going to turn to mush and she’d never be ableto walk again. That thought made her laugh to herself as she stoodthere, holding out her bent silver can, watching as the slush wasdumped into it.
Asshe moved towards the edge of the tent she saw a man stand, tossinghis own can upside down and heading off, and Eloise swore that waswhat the Burning Bush looked like to Moses. For a lady who spent herentire life on her feet and was finally able to sit down and eat, Godwas real! Eloise made a beeline to the chair, where she sat, only tofind someone else had the same idea. With one cheek hanging off theside and the other square in the middle, she looked over to theperson who had tied her to sit.
“Ohyou’re kidding me.” she grumbled, seeing that the Holy Man had nowstarted fighting her for the seat. “Get up. I was here first,”she said in a third grade defense, to which the man simply laughed,stating they both had equal claim to the chair, although how he saidit was far more complicated and southern.
“Holyman, just let me fucking sit here, okay? Please? My feet are achingand I hadn’t sat down in days. I know you are cramped all the time,stretch your legs, please!” Eloise whined to the point where shefelt like crying, but when the man stood up and offered the wholeseat to her, she looked up at him and suddenly wanted to hug him.Unfortunately, the feeling was short lived as he shrugged a shoulderand sat down on her lap.
“What…areyou doing?” Eloise questioned with disgust, the man’s eyes lookinginto his container, shaking it to look at the stew inside. He statedthey had equal claim to the chair, he was just letting her have theseat while he used her as a seat.
Clenchingher jaw, with anger boiling up inside of her, she chugged as muchfood into her mouth as she could before pouring the rest on the man’shead and standing up quickly, watching him roll off her lap and ontothe floor.
“Asshole,”she grumbled as she stomped off,
Heads or Tails | twice-the-fury
Fingers are warm once again against his shoulders before a palm is pressing to the back of his neck. The rocking slows but doesn’t stop with the touch. Boyd’s hands were rough without the gloves, familiar after so long being patched up by the man. It’s almost too easy for Boyd to get his fingers loose from the canon and Grady barely notices as he’s pulled from the niche he had curled himself in to.
The new space he’s pulled in to leaves him curled up close to Boyd’s feet, his shoulder warmed by the man’s calf where he was now sitting. As much as he didn’t actually want to be touched or to have to talk, Grady finds himself pressing in to Boyd’s warm heat. It was more of a comfort than Grady expects, to press in like this to the gunners space. His rocking has slowed to just now and again but the quivering of his shoulders, almost minute spasms still continued.
It takes an embarrassing amount of time for Grady to realize that Boyd had spoken, reassured him of his presence. So Grady clings to it. Pushing himself up, Grady presses his forehead to Boyd’s thigh and curls fingers tight to his calf, the opposite hand coming up to tangle his fingers in the gunners jacket. Outside of the tank it would look as though he were trying to climb in to the man’s lap but like this he was merely just pressed in to his space.
After everything was said and done, Grady’s sure that he’s going to feel embarrassed by what he’s doing but like this, his mind told him he needed it, that he was going to shatter like glass. Boyd is solid under his hands. Grady needs that and clings to his presence, fingers tightening in the cloth of the man’s jacket and trousers.
Sometimes he forgets how young he is, the war makes him feel so old but like this, it’s like being a kid all over again. That’s all he was in this war, a scared kid, barely nineteen.
It wasn't rare for Grady to move against Boyd in this sort of fashion in the tank, the man often using the gunner’s leg to catch up on some much needed sleep when they found themselves moving through the desert with not much to do or say. So it was safe to say it didn't bring too much attention by the other men as Grady curled up to Boyd, pressing his head against his thigh as one arm wrapped around his leg and held him close.
The gunner was rounding himself out with another loud laugh as he felt the tug of desperate fingers against his jacket, and hazel hues lowered to the man who was almost clinging to him for dear life, the sight causing the smile to fade from Boyd’s lips almost instantly when he realized that maybe this was more serious than he had originally thought.
Boyd almost felt a sense of responsibility for the kid, meeting when the holy man was only nineteen years old at the time and Grady was even younger. And somehow, over the course of the past five years, Boyd their relationship had twisted into one that even the gunner couldn't explain, no matter how hard he tried. All he knew was that he was there for Grady and Grady was there for him whenever they needed it. They took care of each other in some strange way, made it easier somehow.
Currently, his hands rested on the edge of his seat, fingers idly sitting between spread legs as he tried to get as comfortable as he could for the long ride ahead. But as Grady’s fingers curled further into the fabric of his jacket and against the hard muscle of his calf, he was quick to move one hand over to loader, fingers running once through his hair slowly before stopping at the nape of his neck.
He squeezed gently, as if to reassure the man that he was still there without uttering a word. Pressing a calloused thumb into the nape of the man’s neck, he began to circle around the soft flesh slowly, massaging his skin for moment before pulling his hand away. But his fingers were quick to find dark locks for a second time as he raked his fingers through the man’s hair once more.
In lieu of having reached over 100 followers (neat!) I’ve decided to do this thing that people tend to do: make an I love you post! It may not mean much to you guys, but it does to me because without you, Eloise wouldn’t survive and I’d be a sad writer trying to find my place in the tumblr rp community, especially given she is an original female character. I’ve met some great people – many of whom I call my friends – and I’ve met some not-so-great people, but nonetheless you guys are the reason I am here! I may not be able to make fancy edit giveaways, or icons, or give you three wishes, or even wave a wand so you have good sex for a whole year, but loving you down I can, and will, do.
So, thank you guys for following (although I don’t know why) and thank you so much for sending me asks, fanmail, submissions, and skype messages. And an even BIGGER thanks for plotting, sending memes, yelling with me ooc, shipping (both romantic and platonic), and just being there for me when I’ve not felt tip-top. UR DA BEST! Remember, this isn’t a popularity contest, you ALL mean something to me regardless of where I shove you on this thing and if I didn’t mention you, don’t be sad, it just means we haven’t talked or plotted yet!
My Baes - You jerks, givin’ me feels. I love you guys so much. I’ll follow you anywhere. You guys are amazing writers and amazing friends.
boydsbible // doc-eugene // twice-the-fury // a-devil-watches-his-own // wxrriiors // ellxson // gott–mit–uns // ilma-rinen // icaxrus // malarkeydonald // medicwade // heffron-babe // captain-jh-miller // montanaparker // ichbinkeinflo // thxhost // deuce-n-dreidel
Other Baes - I love you guys, some have been with me since the beginning and I can’t wait to see what else we can come up with! (Special note to gunslinger, we will write together dammit!)
bvrgie // conelhughalexander // forwhatevercomes // ofwardaddy // wranka // mybeachmywxve // gunslingerdixon // grimpancakes // legalant
Newbies that I want to plot with and/or you should follow**:
capdickwinters // eugenexsledge // irishbastcrd // lieb-the-cabbie // nothingexcepthonor // noorangeflags // outsidethedefinition // paintxd // sxldierx // stoicsmoker // shaunrichardwhyte // vxndenburg // volansalte // irohthesecond // teadrinkersrebellion
**some may be on hiatus or ded, but deserved recognition regardless
Heads or Tails | twice-the-fury
With his breathes starting to come in ragged gasps and the feeling of the tank closing it, Grady curls in tighter to himself. A hand on his shoulder was a surprise, leaving the spot cool as it pulls away and he can tell just by the firm hold that it had been Boyd who had noticed. Of course it was Boyd. Don was so preoccupied with what was going on over head and Gordo and Red always looking forward. He squeezes his eyes shut tighter.
The laughter over the coms is too much and it makes his chest constrict and he unlatches the helmet to push it from his head, fingers shaky as he disconnects the mic and the roar of the tank is loud. Sweaty hair sticks up in odd angles, scratchy against his forehead where the sweat and dirt had glued it against his face.
Despite the engine, the crunch of gravel and rubble under the tracks, there’s a quiet. His bones still quivered, muscles wound tight. He rocks. Like fighting, it helps nothing, it doesn’t make him feel better but it feels like it’s doing something as it’s happening or maybe he feels like he’s doing something.
Grady’s fingers curl tight into the machinery of the canon, grasping where he knew was safe without looking. No burns or cuts, no missing parts. Just knuckles going white as though it would stop the way he shook.
A loud laugh escaped his lips cheerfully as he turned back to Grady once more, hoping that his partner had finally snapped out of whatever it was before he found himself needing him in a time of desperation. But when hazel hues fell on the man once more, the sight was one that caused the smile to fade from his lips almost immediately as he turned in his chair, left leg tapping wildly as he turned back to Don to make sure he wasn’t looking.
Pulling the mic from its plug, he knew his connection was lost as he slid over in his seat, gloved hand moving around the side of the loaders neck and shoulder as he squeezed once more, trying to get a reaction out of the man. But he was tucked too far into himself, fingers gripping the machinery tightly as he avoided Boyd’s gaze and the gunner took one last look over the men in the tank before turning back to Grady once more.
“Grady, what the hell are you doin’,” he asked, his voice sharp as he spoke to the other man, fingers gripping tighter around his scruff. His leg tapped even more furiously now as the man bit down on his lower lip, still awaiting a reaction or word from the man that never came. But his patience was wearing thin, and it only took a few more seconds before the gunner found himself looping his fingers around the man’s collar and pulling him across the basket and over to the foot of his chair quickly, as not to bring too much attention to those around them.
“I got you, okay,” he reassured the man, his hand squeezing his shoulder once more before letting go of Grady entirely, leaving him to his own devices. As he pushed himself back upright in his seat, Boyd’s hands moved quickly to plug his mic back into the comms. And without skipping a beat, he chimed into the conversation again, the smile returning to his face as the topic turned from having sex with French and German women to Red and his inability to last a couple hours without needing to take a piss out of the hatch.
With him, life was routine; without him, life was unbearable.
Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird
Poltergeist/Seminary Student AU:
Brother Boyd Swan: I am sending this to you with the utmost urgency. I have nowhere else to turn seeing as to how the Catholic Church – and every other church really – has shunned my claims. My house is possessed. I’ve many files of my broken bones, deemed extreme clumsiness by doctors and someone with Munchhausen by another. I’m not asking for much, just for you to come and see if it is cursed. That sounds silly doesn’t it? But it is the God’s honest truth. Both my cats were killed last week, tell me how they managed to boil alive when I’ve no heat in my house? To sound like the nerd that I am, help me Brother Boyd, you’re my only hope.
Eloise Clarke has recently moved into an heirs home from her deceased Uncle Leon. Non-religious and not one for scary stories or superstition, when things start acting off in her new home, from broken mirrors, dying animals, and freak accidents, she is starting to think that there is something wrong with the house. Unable to have it blessed or anyone from any church to come look at it, Eloise is given a name of a young Seminary student named Boyd Swan who may just be her last hope.
“You get to go home, Boyd! I have to go back into that seventh circle of hell! You know you’ll wake up tomorrow morning, I’ve no idea if I’ll even make it to take a piss when I walk through the front door!”
Only one who has known how troubled life can be, has a real appreciation of it when it is good.
Ludwig Bemelmans
Book of Isaiah, Chapter Six.
01. Hero of War – Rise Against 02. To Be Alone With You – Joshua James 03. Just Breath – Willie Nelson & Lucas Nelson 04. Demons – Tyler Ward & Kina Grannis 05. Take Me to Church – Jasmine Thompson 06. I’m Gonna Be (500 Miles) – Sleeping at Last 07. I Will Be Blessed – Ben Howard 08. Me & God – Trent Dabbs 09. Sinking Man – Of Monsters and Men 10. Praise You in This Storm – Sating Crowns
Spotify [x] for twice-the-fury