not a lawyer

hi i'm bahorel and i once fought a wall and won

[whirlwindgavroche-blog]

“All mine so far.” He laughed, leaning down to pet and scratch at his dogs ears. “Eponine is going ballistic back home.” He grinned, shaking his head. “But she’ll just have to get used to it. These dogs own my heart. They’re never leaving my side. Okay maybe one or two of em will go because ya know I can’t take care of all of them. But like the rest are totes mine.” 

[brashandtrash-blog]

Bahorel laughed as he slid his phone back into his pocket. “Ya know what? I bet you’ll take great care of all of ‘em. Just make sure to give them lots of fresh air, dogs love that shit.” He crouched down to let the other dogs sniff his hands before he started to pet them. And oh boy, this was like doggy heaven. “You should like, bring these down to the college. Anti-Stress pups and what not, I bet loads of people would come and see them. It’d be a great way to find homes for them if they get too much... or a good way to make a couple of bucks.”

[whirlwindgavroche-blog]

Gav hadn’t even broke a sweat, he ran a lot. He came to a screeching halt in front of his friend. “Ayeeee, Bahorel, Beaaar. Mah duuudes.” He finger gunned as best he could and grabbed Macaroni up. “Man I know you missed your bud but you can’t run off like that, what if the fuzz caught you?” He laughed, shaking his head and put him back down and held his leash tightly.

“Bear liking his new home?” He asked with a grin.

[brashandtrash-blog]

“I should have known he was yours,” Bahorel laughed as he finger gunned at Gavroche in return. Bear barked happily and pulled against his leash to say hello to all the other dogs. “He’s loving it- thanks again, by the way, I owe you one.” Which would make this either the fourth or fifth favor he owed Gav. Goddammit. “You look like you could use a hand walking all those pups... are they all yours or have you found homes for some of ‘em?”

[whirlwindgavroche-blog]

It was walking time™ so Gav and his pack of dogs were walking down the street, it was a sight to behold indeed. Mainly because a tiny teenager had a variety of dogs. There were mutts, puppy mutts, adult mutts, more pure bred looking dogs, small dogs, big dogs. They were all surprisingly well trained though, well mostly. Gavroche was just really good with them. For the most part that was. There was one dog in his pack that was…special. He liked to think he was the leader which was rude since that was obviously Gav. 

Anyways, he was doing a really great job of walking his pack when the leashes got tangled, there was just…….so many. In the mass of tangled leashes one got let go and WHOOSH. Off went the special dog who Gav had dubbed Macaroni. 

“MACARONI GET BACK HERE, YOU SON OF A BITCH.” Gav shouted, taking off with his pack of dogs running after the scruffy looking mutt.

[brashandtrash-blog]

Bear was a very energetic dog but that was fine with Bahorel because he was a very energetic person. The two of them would go for walks whenever Bahorel needed a break from all his school work, which meant that they were usually out and about. The two of them were standing on the sidewalk, Bahorel checking his phone as his Saint Bernard eagerly sniffed and licked a nearby garbage can.

Bahorel was deciding if he should reply with a single eggplant emoji or a whole bunch of them when suddenly his dog started to bark. “Yo, calm down Bear,” he said as he looked up only to see a scruffy looking pup run over. Bear was ecstatic and the two of them started barking and yipping at each other as they jumped around. “Oh man, would you look at that, you made a friend!”

[daydrunkdionysus-blog]

[To Bahorel]: You broke his nose! Enjolras blames himself! And okay, yeah, he was complicit, but you guys acted irrationally, and now this poor guy is in pain for literally no reason. 

[To Bahorel]: I’m the dad friend. (And also the vodka aunt). It’s my job to give you the “I’m not mad, I’m disappointed” speech.

[To Bahorel]: You’re grounded, indefinitely, and you need to personally deliver an apology. I’ve given the same sentence to Enjolras. 

[brashandtrash-blog]

[To Grantaire]: Pfft, it’s just a broken nose, Nass will live [To Grantaire]: GROUNDED?! WHAT [To Grantaire]: wait what does that even mean, you can’t ground me, ur not my reaL DAD [To Grantaire]: (I’m working on an apology, okay? I just need to find a suitable gift)

[daydrunkdionysus-blog]

[To Bahorel]: You fucking idiot, what were you thinking? [To Bahorel]: But, at the same time, if it were me, I’d probably react the same way. [To Bahorel]: So I’m disappointed, but I also kind of get it? You’re still an idiot.

[brashandtrash-blog]

[To Grantaire]: I was thinking “hey, let’s piss everyone off, that’d be fun”. [To Grantaire]: that was poorly veiled sarcasm btw, clearly I wans’t thinking at all the other night [To Grantaire]: Aww, come on, don’t pull that ‘I’m not mad I’m disappointed’ thing with me, you’re gonna hurt my heart :’c

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

“He’s Claquesous. He couldn’t stop a pig in an alley.” Jehan said, running his hands through his hair. “I know this is a misunderstanding, and I know you meant well, but I’ve never seen Montparnasse scared to talk to me before, and it broke my heart.” Jehan said, “You need to make this right before I can forgive you. I won’t be pulled between the two of you. I’m not interested in being a pawn in your battle with Montparnasse. He’s good for me. And I like to think I’m good for him. If you can’t accept that then I’ll just have to take things from there, but that’s not a situation I want to be in with you.”

[brashandtrash-blog]

As if Bahorel was supposed to know whether Clasquesous was serious about stabbing him or not. Frustrated at this whole situation, Bahorel grumpily took a lengthy sip of his drink, shaking his cup to shift the ice around. “Oh my god, you make it sound like he’s my archenemy or something. I’m not a fan of the guy but I don’t hate him. I’m just trying to look out for you... but yeah, okay, fine, I’ll apologize. In a day or two because I’m pretty sure the last thing he wants to see right about now is my face.” Although it was tempting to stop by at his apartment, mostly just to see his reaction.

[bowties-and-sweetdreams]

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

“No. No of course you didn’t because you didn’t stop to think. If you’d have come to me first I would have told you. As it is I didn’t tell you because I knew you’d react like this. Like my knight in shining armor. If i didn’t know any better I’d say you were jealous, B.” Jehan said, “I know Claquesous from back then but that’s no reason for you to break his wrist. I’m still in contact with him and I’m still clean.” Jehan said, pulling up the sleeves of his jacket to prove it. You mean the world to me, Bahorel, but so does he. And you two are going to have to get along, for my sake. So I suggest you start with an apology.”

[brashandtrash-blog]

“I broke his wrist because Clasquesous pulled a knife on me.” he said as he ran his hand over his face. “And I had I known you two were dating, I wouldn’t have reacted like this. I may not have been happy because I still don’t trust him, but I wouldn’t have gone looking for a fight.” Bahorel looked around the coffee shop and sighed, slumping in his seat. “I just...” a pause as he tried to get his thoughts together, “I didn’t want to take the chance. I trust you, okay, I know getting clean was hard, but I just had to make sure that they- that Montparnasse wasn’t trying to bring you back to that lifestyle.”

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

“He didn’t know, Bahorel. Do you want to see the proof? He had no idea! The two of us are hanging out because we’re dating. I love him, Bahorel and you beat the shit out of him for loving me. He was scared to text me, his boyfriend. You terrified him so much that he was willing to completely cut me off rather than anger you again.” Jehan said, verging on hysteria. “You’re meant to be my best friend and you sought out and beat up my boyfriend because you don’t like him. What would you do if I did that to Feuilly? You’d put me on my ass, B, and don’t pretend you wouldn’t.” Jehan said.

[brashandtrash-blog]

“Wait wait wait,” Bahorel held out his hands, “you... you and Montparnasse are dating?” He didn’t know that. He had just assumed- oh, so that’s what people meant when they say ‘if you assume you make an ass out of u and me’. This news was game changing and Bahorel groaned, resting his head in his hands. “I didn’t know.” he mumbled. He felt like shit, in all honesty, and had he known this, maybe he wouldn’t have hurt Montparnasse and Clasquesous. Or, well, maybe not as badly, anyways.

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

“You don’t know him.” Jehan said, “You have no right to call him a piece of shit. I don’t see any bruises or marks on you, and you’re going to call him a piece of shit? If you were worried you should have come to me, instead of playing judge jury and executioner.” Jehan said, sipping his drink to cool down. “And you just so happen to blurt out about my past? That wasn’t your story to tell.” Jehan said, looking down at his lap. “Montparnasse didn’t even know, so how could he have been planning to get me hooked again?” Jehan said, running a hand through his hair. 

[brashandtrash-blog]

Bahorel pointed at the back of his head and turned a little in his seat to show it to Jehan. “I didn’t walk away completely unscathed- see that bump there?” It was nothing compared to Montparnasse’s nose or Clasquesous wrist but still, it’s all he had. He turned back around and took a sip of his drink. “What do you mean he didn’t know?” he scoffed as he swirled his straw around. “Of course he knew, why else would the two of you be hanging out?”

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

“Montparnasse is on my mind.” Jehan said, crossing his arms and levelling his gaze with Bahorel’s. “Just in case it slipped your mind, you’re not my keeper, B. You don’t get to decide who is and isn’t good for me. I’m not a child. Montparnasse knew nothing about my past, only now he does, because you beat it into him. What were you thinking?” Jehan said, nothing but fury in his face. His boyfriend was bruised and broken and hurt, and Bahorel was to blame. “What the hell were you thinking?”

[brashandtrash-blog]

Ah. So they were going to just jump right into it. “I was thinking that he’s a piece of shit and you shouldn’t be hanging around guys like him.” He wasn’t surprised that Jehan was getting defensive, but he was surprised at how angry his friend was. “I know I’m not your keeper or bodyguard or anything like that- but Enjolras and I were worried. And just so you know, I was planning on simply talking to the guy, not my fault things got out of hand.” he said, deliberately leaving out the fact that he was the one to throw the first punch.

[ordinarily-delicate-blog]

Jehan sat down at one of the tables outside, a mango and passion fruit iced drink in front of him. His foot tapped against the floor, to the very rhythm of his heart breaking. He knew Bahorel wouldn’t approve of his relationship with Montparnasse, but he’d hoped that Bahorel would trust his judgement and at least try to be civil. But no, he’d gone after Nass, injured him, and told him about Jehan’s drug addiction. If Jehan didn’t love Bahorel so much he’d have called the police. He saw Bahorel approaching and spread his legs wider, setting his feet firmly against the ground and clenching his jaw. He was ready for this, no matter how painful it’d be.

[brashandtrash-blog]

Bahorel didn’t want to be late for his meet up with Jehan, so he brought his dog along with him. He tied his leash to one of the bicycle racks outside and promised that he wouldn’t take too long. Bear, for his part, seemed absolutely thrilled. Bahorel saw Jehan and waved to him before going to the counter to buy himself a large iced tea. And a muffin, because how could he say no? “Hey,” he said as he slid across from Jehan. “What’s on your mind?”

[brashandtrash-blog]

To Bahorel: Sure. I'll see you at the one in the park in 15 minutes.

To Jehan: you got it my dude~

[brashandtrash-blog]

To Bahorel: I need to talk to you.

To Jehan: Ok. Wanna meet up at a coffee shop or something?

[brashandtrash-blog]

To Bahorel: Where are you?

To Jehan: I'm walking the dog. Why, what's up?

[brashandtrash-blog]

Rock ‘n Load ✗ Montparnasse, Clasquesous & Bahorel

[abeautifulscoundrel-blog1]

Claquesous screamed so loud, Nass was sure if this fight went on any longer they were going to get arrested. Nass felt sick when he heard the bone snap, he’ll feel monumentally guilty about being the reason that Sous got hurt tomorrow. “I don’t know–what the fuck you’re talking about. Jehan never…” he paused, “Jehan never told me a-anything–about drugs.” He stared at Bahorel through swollen, squinty eyes. He felt dizzy, and he was going to have two matching black eyes for weeks while his nose healed. If his nose healed. first his hair turned orange and now he;s going to have a purple crooked nose? Could this get any worse? 

[clossandgloss-blog]

The second the fucker grabbed his wrist Closs had a moment of ‘Oh fuck’, the scream that left his mouth was inhuman and he couldn’t focus on anything but the fact that he was in a lot of fucking pain. He gripped his arm tightly and cried out, gritting his teeth together and screwing his eyes shut. He had fallen to his knees and pressed his face into the dirty sidewalk. “Fuck, oh shit!!” He whimpered loudly, cradling his shattered wrist to his chest. “Nass man, my fucking wrist….” 

[brashandtrash-blog]

Bahorel stood there and glanced between the two of them. He wasn’t proud of what he did- no, never proud when things ended up like this- but he knew that he got his point across and did what Enjolras wanted. They’d both be hurting for awhile. “Uh huh, yeah sure. Lying ain’t gonna help ya now bud.” It was almost cute that he tried to lie now when both he and Clasquesous were on the ground. He reached up and gently prodded the back of his head, wincing when it brought more bursts of color across his eyes. Lovely. “This is your warning and I suggest you take it to heart.”

[brashandtrash-blog]

Rock ‘n Load ✗ Montparnasse, Clasquesous & Bahorel

[abeautifulscoundrel-blog1]

Nass almost threw up when Bahorel’s fist made contact with his stomach. He stumbled again, tears pricking in his eyes, as if the pain wasn’t bad enough, Bahorel’s words cut deep. He tried to advance on Bahorel, but he was feeling himself grow weaker, he landed one pretty good punch to Bahorel’s upper jaw, but faltered a little as he could feel himself growing dizzy. “I- I- won’t-” he protest, dodging Bahorel’s skillful swings at him, but only succeeding in falling to the ground, “I won’t ruin him, you’re wrong, he loves m–” He gagged a little spitting a startling amount of blood onto the pavement. “You’re wrong.” He glared at Bahorel, wobbly standing back up, fists raised.

[clossandgloss-blog]

When Closs realized what was going on he knew he couldn’t let it go any farther. This man was bigger than Nass and overpowering him. It wasn’t fair, besides Mont hadn’t even done anything. I mean he’d angered a lot of people back in the day, but for the most part he was a good person, an honest…okay maybe he wasn’t honest about a lot of things but he was still Sous’ mate, his best friend. Glaring he shoved his hand in his pocket and pulled his knife out. “Get off of him!!” He growled, charging forward. Aiming for the guys lower gut. 

[brashandtrash-blog]

The hit to his jaw stung and sent his head reeling back but it only took him off guard for a second. He threw a few more punches, missing every one, but it didn’t matter because Montparnasse was on the ground, which meant the fight was nearly over. He was ready to kick Montparnasse’s legs out from underneath him, but that that buddy of his decided to pull out a knife. Bahorel wasn’t afraid, but he became aware that this fight just got a lot more serious.

Luckily enough for him, Clasquesous didn’t seem very experienced with a knife. Bahorel locked his knees and stood his ground, waiting until he was close enough before reaching out and grabbing his wrist, quickly pulling it back. He heard a small crack which, ew, gross, but that took care of the knife problem. “No, I’m not wrong. I know about the people you hang around with. If you get Jehan hooked again, I’ll kill you, understand? He worked too hard to get clean and I’m not letting you fuckers drag him back down.”