Nick @brokeboynick - Tumblr Blog

cramulus

freshest-memes

Roman emperor in a lower temperature

by-grace-of-god

…Caesar in the freezer

…Ruler in the cooler

…Julius in the coolius

tooiconic

Julius in the Coolius

twilightisgaynow

new high school classmate: so what’s your name

renesmee: renesmee

new classmate: that’s… interesting

renesmee: my mom was on crack when she named me

bella, sitting literally two seats away:

sangotori

I’m so concerned that this post implies Bella and Edward will attend high school again with their own daughter

twilightisgaynow

youre goddamn right thats what im implying

This post isn’t written in any known human language

patheticperipatetic

Is this what understanding a newspaper political cartoon is like?

bemyvalentinoxo

savleighm

cartnsncreal

She should have a statue. Not those confederate MFs.

i-hate-chick-fil-a

For those of you in college/university or plan to go.

alongfalltothetop-deactivated20

Oh I’m an asshole.

So today pulling into Stop and Shop, this lady cut me off and nearly drove into me, and then, when I tried to pass her, she swung to the right and nearly hit me again, and then flipped me off.

So somebody is having a bad day and taking it out on me. That’s fine. It’s harmless, and I don’t know what’s going on in this woman’s life. I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt she’s not just a piece of shit and is just having a bad day.

But then I park and she follows me, and gets out of the car and starts swearing at me and getting in my face.

Now I go from “indifferent” to “I’m gonna fuck with this woman’s head.” Now I would say I’m a gentleman of size, and in all black and bemohawked I probably look spookier than I actually am, so props to this lady for getting in my face. Now of course I’m not going to hit her, or even threaten violence. That’s shitty. Nobody should get threatened with violence.

Instead, I take a step back, narrowing my eyes like I’m studying her face really closely, and then I touch one of the several piece of “occulty” jewelry I’m wearing (none of which, by the way, are magicked in any way at all). Then I mumble some nonsense under my breath, and then make the fig gesture and the horns at her.

She stops, wide-eyed.

“WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST DO TO ME?”

I chuckled, and shake my head. “Nothing at all.” I say in a not-terrible convincing voice. “But every time something bad happens to you today, you’re gonna be thinking of me.”

Then I winked at her, and walked away.