tacitly terrible

25 sometimes life happens and grammar goes out the fuckin window

[clingyduoapologist]

Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife

[dazzling-galaxy]

i also want to read this guy’s dead wife

[midiport]

[messygoku]

[toskarin]

me: if I become the evil overlord I will never harm my minions

[5 years later]

highly throwable imp: hoohoohee

me: hmm

[ladyofthebookcase]

sorry this is like genuinely killing me. my head hurts so bad from laughing this much

[banepenis]

perish the thought, dude. *playfully pushes you by the shoulder* haha, like, cease these peculiarities. *becomes extremely violent and starts hitting you with heavy fists without provocation* disabuse that fucking notion

[fellator]

this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play

[mellifexfarm]

bring your ugly to work day

[vigilantkilliforniakatholixxx]

[loveridden1999]

top 3 hobbies for young adults:

1. borrowing misery from future

2. carrying grief of the past

3. agonizing over the present

[markovchaingang]

RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:

my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm

a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force

daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed

always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't

you do not talk about my daughter

[targetedknowledge]

[klapollo]

at planned parenthood and they're playing regular show

[klapollo]

[cutecipher]

"dude if you don't get this abortion benson is gonna fire us"

[free-my-mindd]

[persianmom-deactivated20260602]

she’s just like me fr

[loveridden1999]

[nicolodigenovas]

Come back, I have to tell you the plot of a fic I’ll never write and get you excited about it so we can all be disappointed with me later