Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife
i also want to read this guy’s dead wife
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

#extradirty
Cosimo Galluzzi
wallacepolsom
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
ojovivo
trying on a metaphor
occasionally subtle
will byers stan first human second
Today's Document

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taylor price
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Claire Keane
Peter Solarz

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blake kathryn

oozey mess
One Nice Bug Per Day
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from United States

seen from T1

seen from Malaysia

seen from United States
seen from Lithuania
seen from Maldives
seen from Canada
seen from Chile
seen from United States

seen from Argentina

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from United States
@brownleathershoes
Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife
i also want to read this guy’s dead wife
me: if I become the evil overlord I will never harm my minions
[5 years later]
highly throwable imp: hoohoohee
me: hmm
sorry this is like genuinely killing me. my head hurts so bad from laughing this much
perish the thought, dude. *playfully pushes you by the shoulder* haha, like, cease these peculiarities. *becomes extremely violent and starts hitting you with heavy fists without provocation* disabuse that fucking notion
this fetish stuff is getting out of hand what the fuck is word play
bring your ugly to work day
top 3 hobbies for young adults:
1. borrowing misery from future
2. carrying grief of the past
3. agonizing over the present
RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER:
my daughter cannot, through action or inaction, harm a human or allow a human to come to harm
a daughter at rest or in constant motion remains at rest or in constant motion unless acted upon by another force
daughters are never created or destroyed, only transformed
always treat every daughter as loaded, even if you know she isn't
you do not talk about my daughter
at planned parenthood and they're playing regular show
"dude if you don't get this abortion benson is gonna fire us"
she’s just like me fr
Come back, I have to tell you the plot of a fic I’ll never write and get you excited about it so we can all be disappointed with me later