summary: Bucky finds comfort in a friend
pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader (platonic)
warnings: fluff, slight angst
a/n: another lil baby fluff i had to get out. had the idea this morning as i was laying in bed. very platonic bucky and reader. sorry if it’s kinda awful–might edit later. but enjoy!
When Bucky opens up her door, the air conditioner is on full blast and he’s slightly chilly. There is a mound underneath the covers and his heart calms down just a little bit. He pads over to the bed quietly, trying not to wake her, but needing to see her face to calm his racing mind. It’s still early, not yet nine am, so he figured that she would still be asleep. He sees part of her hair on the pillow and crouches down so he’s eye level with her.
In the midst of his overactive mind, he can’t help but think that she looks utterly adorable when she sleeps. She’s curled up on her side, face half-smushed into her pillows and her comforter is wrapped around her entirely. There’s a warmth in his chest and he smiles slightly, listening to her breathing. He absentmindedly thumbs the edge of the comforter that is hanging off the side of the bed.
It’s another moment before her eyes crack open slowly, and she hums, snuggling herself further into her bed. “Hi, Buck.”
“How was your morning run?” Her voice is gentle, and her hands comes up to brush her hair out of her face.
He nods absently, glancing behind her to look at the shades, the sunlight peeking through the cracks. “It was fine.”
He swallows and nods, fingers still playing with the edge of her comforter. He hears the concern in her voice, can feel her eyes narrow just slightly at him. This isn’t the first time that this has happened, and he’s glad that she no longer questions it.
He doesn’t really remember how it started. Their friendship was normal and she was always careful around him because she was a touchy person, and she didn’t want to push him too far. She was always animated and bubbly, talking with her hands and making gestures, always incredibly sweet and caring and he sort of like drifted to her naturally. She likes Polaroid pictures and books, tangible things that she could hold onto. Big sweaters and blankets. Lots of music, good food and sleeping.
Whenever she was going out somewhere or getting something for herself, she always asked Bucky if he wanted to join her, wanted to get out and be normal. She always offered a hand to help him out and teased him lightly, a sparkle in her eyes. She was so cute and so soft and the protective instinct in the former assassin kicked in whenever she was around him. She was too good for this world, he deemed, too good to be fighting bad guys and kicking ass and being part of their motley crew.
She was always careful around him because she was so touchy, though, always giving hugs and touchings arms and hands to her friends as if on autopilot, but that did not diminish the fact that it was out of love for her comrades. It was part of her nature, her “motherly instincts” as she had said multiple times. The first time she had accidently touched him without permission, she immediately withdrew her hand from his back, a string of embarrassed apologies flowing from her mouth. Bucky was only slightly surprised however, that he wasn’t bothered by it. Her touch was light and affectionate, so he simply chuckled and said that he was okay, that she was okay and didn’t need to refrain from being affectionate with him.
And so, over time, she grew more and more platonically affectionate with him. A squeeze of his arm, her arm slung around his waist and his over her shoulder. When he hugged her, his arms went around her back and hers around his waist, and he wraps himself around her and gives her a squeeze. The first time he had been anxious and she had suggested trying something, she had experimentally run her hands through his hair and he practically melted in her lap, calming down in a matter of minutes.
He was so touch starved and he didn’t even notice it, so he would welcome anything she offered him with a soft smile. She was warm and soft and so gentle and gave him a sense of comfort.
The first time he had barged into her room seeking her comfort, she had been watching a movie late at night. His mind was in tatters and he knew she could see it written across his face. He was shocked when she pulled open her covers and suggest that he lay down next to her.
“Sometimes just sleeping next to someone is a comfort all on it’s own.”
They lay facing each other that night, talking until she was spent and her eyes drifted close. He watched her for a moment, noticing that his heart and mind had calmed themselves as well, and he wondered how she did it. There wasn’t even anything romantic about it, about their relationship–Bucky conceded that she was a presence that some god somewhere decided that he was lucky enough to have as a comfort, as a friend. Ever since then, when his mind was especially bad, he would seek her out and just lay with her.
Which is why he knows that she isn’t surprised to see him here, crouching next to her bed, his heartbeat slightly accelerated as his mind races.
He hears her sigh and is snapped out of his thoughts to see her eyes closed, her hand snaking out towards him from underneath her covers. He wraps his flesh hand around hers, thumb stroking the back of her hand. “Did you shower?”
He hums softly, her skin against his already calming him. He hopes she can’t feel his erratic heartbeat.
She peeks a look at him through one eye and scoots back, letting go of his hand and throwing her covers open with an exaggerated flourish. “Well what are you waiting for Buckaroo?” She pats the bed, continuing because she knows he needs to hear the invitation, because he doesn’t want to intrude on her, “get in here.”
He chuckles lightly at her and slides into the spot she had previously been in, and she throws the covers back over him. Her smell and warmth encompasses him and he immediately relaxes into it all with a soft sigh as it seeps into his bones. He turns on his side to face her and smiles when he sees that she looks the same as when he found her–curled into her side, face half-smushed into her pillow. He curls slightly, metal hand sliding under the pillow and his flesh hand reaching out towards her. He hesitates for a moment before she seems to read his mind and grabs it. A warmth settles in his heart.
“Do you wanna talk about what’s on your mind?”
Sometimes, he’ll talk about what happened and how his mind is a mess and what’s on it. She always asks and sometimes he talks, but this is not one of those times. For the moment, he is at ease and he wants it to stay like this, wants their bubble to be calm.
“No, but thank you.” He releases her hand to gently brush some hair out of her face and her lips quirk up the slightest. He curls his fingers around her hand, one finger at the base of her wrist to feel her pulse. Because even in his sleep, just the slightest note of her heartbeat calms him.
Her fingers squeeze his ever so gently. “I got you, Buck. I’m right here.”
He drifts off into peaceful nap, his heart warm and mind and body completely at ease.
@buckyywiththegoodhair @sweetboybucky @softlybarnes @delos-mio @samingtonwilson @sgtjbuccky
