[theladyjojogrant]

“It’s been a long week,” I say in the middle of the day on Monday. 

[micdotcom]

Watch: “Is this the president we want for our daughters?”

[unicornempire]

I wish that the Hilary Campaign would take this and buy ads, just everywhere. You can’t possibly think this kind of human being, if you can even still call him that, is a fit and just choice for the Presidency. Like… I can’t wrap my head around people who support this garbage troll for President. Just can’t.

[docwsb]

[askarkham]

It’s like someone went crazy with a label maker and I love it.

[tastefullyoffensive]

by Mr. Lovenstein (secret panel)

[shenanigans-of-a-young-person]

“really?” I say to inanimate objects that are not working like they usually do

“Stay.” I glare at inanimate objects that continuously fall over

[unironicallyenthusiasticknitter]

“Thank you!” I say exhasperatedly to the inanimate objects when they do finally work right/stay put

[joestoyes]

“Sorry! I say to the table I bumped into

[q834tq3hgfq39fh9q348h-deactivat]

“SHHH” I say to the inanimate object that keeps making noise

[bittyblueeyes]

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming,” I huff at the persistent kitchen timer.

[alex-guerin]

“Don’t take that tone with me!” I exclaim at objects that make strange and sudden unknown noises.

[ralkana]

“Stop crying, you’re fine,” I snap as I’m looking for the charger cord for the electronic device beeping demandingly at me.

[k-lionheart-deactivated20171126]

“Oh nice, real mature,” I snarl at devices that suddenly stop working after I berate them for not working properly.

[sweetlyminiaturesublime]

JESUS CHRIST I HAVE NEVER RELATED SO HARD IN MY LIFE

[eclipsemidnight]

“Just shut up,” I groan when the alarm clock across the room goes off.

[sanerontheinside]

“No, no, don’t be dead,” I plead with the infamous Blue Screen of Death

[obaewankenope]

“I trusted you,” I whisper, staring at the app that just restarted and deleted everything that I spent two hours writing with tears in my eyes.

[hellyeahthomassanders]

It’s Not That Complicated 💗💜💙 by Thomas Sanders

[penguinhatgirl]

Literally this simple

[prom0rhell]

This is the Bi Content™ I’m looking for

[canthaveapiewithoutcoolwhip]

[kingofthehillcaps]

[laptopstrum-deactivated20181203]

laptopStrummer laptopStrummer, c'est de la musique électronique ! #chillwave #edm #house #frenchtouch #space #stellar Découvrir les autres projets musique

Hi everyone !!

My music has been selectionned for a monthly contest by a french coffee company ! This means so much to me tbh :) Now I need your help to win the final round ! If you wanna help me out, feel free to click on the little heart next to my new tune, LOV, on the right of the month pick !

Click >here< to find the voting page !

Any help is appreciated and feel free to share the word !!

Cheers ;)

[capiroska]

Vote and share to help a really talented lil buddy :D

[stale-thot-deactivated20170503]

omgggg

[nahimoffthis-deactivated2018091]

LMAOO

[koobaxion-deactivated20220403]

[alienpapacy]

you ever see an image and think “i may see something as funny as this again, but never anything funnier”

[teesadutta]

[chizsles]

Joe Biden- part time VP, full time savage

[generalfestivitieshottub]

[waffleawful]

Thick hair gothic.

You’re curling. You’re curling. You just keep curling. It never ends. There’s always more hair.

It’s 90 in March. You think that maybe this year you’ll save yourself the pain and get it cut short. Then you remember that the hairdresser at your local salon has only nine fingers now, and you don’t know that you can blame the scissors again. 

You wonder when your bobby pins will come back from the war.

[voidsmoocher]

People reach out to play with you hair, but your hair doesn’t want to play. They lose a hand and still the hair’s hunger goes unquenched. Who will be its next victim?

It is tangled again. You just brushed it 15 minutes ago. You ignore the growling coming from behind you as you go to brush it again.

You squeeze conditioner into your hand. You keep squeezing. More. More. It is never enough.

There’s hair everywhere. On your bed. In the shower. On your clothes. Good god, you’re surrounded.

Hair ties scream at the strain of containing your hair. People pretend not to hear them. They only get louder.

[nativepeopleproblems]

It is humid outside. You cannot feel it, but you know. Your hair makes sure you know. This only happens on days you’ve straightened it. Your friends laugh uncomfortably when you suggest that perhaps it is sentient. You play it off as a joke, but it keeps you up at night, wondering.

You stand outside the shower. your hair isn’t wet yet. you turn shower on and under its hot spray but still water runs over tub fills room. struggle to stay afloat. is not wet.

Your bathroom counter is a war zone, the corpses of clips and ties strewn about, never to be used again. You cannot bring yourself to throw them out.

Something pokes at your head. You did not put anything in your hair. You don’t think this pin even belongs to you. But your hair has claimed it now, like a dragon with its hoard.

[idk-kun]

my experience with pokemon go so far

[violeteyedmedium]

I would walk 500 miles

And I would walk 500 more

Just to be the man who walked a thousand miles to catch a bulbasaur

[faesylveon-deactivated20191106]

English Pronunciation

[9-aem-deactivated20220901]

If you can pronounce correctly every word in this poem, you will be speaking English better than 90% of the native English speakers in the world.

After trying the verses, a Frenchman said he’d prefer six months of hard labour to reading six lines aloud.

[source]

[to-the-captain]

OUR TEACHER MADE US READ THIS OUT LOUD IN CLASS AND I DIED

[platypusplayhere]

this is an elegant kind of torture

[un-ionizetheradlab]

Is there a french version of this, with torturously difficult words to pronounce? I need some more fun in my life and would totally record myself doing a french version of this:))) Est-ce qu'il y a une version française de ça, avec des mots qui sont vachement difficile à prononcer comme étranger ? J'ai besoin de m'amuser plus et je m'enregistrerai sans aucun doute en lisant une version française de ça :)) @useless-francefacts @awesomefrench

[bookendscafe]

Oh ! Mon patron en France m'a lu une poésie un peu comme ça avec des mots casse-tête du français, mais je ne l'ai plus

Il y a aussi ça que j’ai du lire en classe pour mon prof de français l’année dernière et je peux te dire que c’était horrible !