hi, iâm emily. iâm english, iâm twenty-one, and iâm a slut. for my boyfriend, and for men much older than me. i mostly read books, but sometimes i post fics on here that donât belong on my other blogs.
âËđđËâ my main blog is technically @superbusmeretrix, but more often than not i use this blog, and my marauders blog, which is @twovialsofamortentia. this blog is sort of my not-main-main-blog.
âËđđËâ if you want to request something based on what iâve been posting, please do! my requests will always be open for anyone i post about. you can also check the tags of this post to see who that is.
i wanted to do this for so long and then i saw my beloved taggie doing this and it felt like a sign. below are my absolute favorite authors and their works of art. shakespeare aint got shit on yall.
(considering i 99% times read about sam, the list below features only sam fics) 18+ !! mdni probably gonna update overtime !!
@thesundontshineontheseeyebrows
"you should see the things we do in my dreams"
gotta start with my absolute favorite fanfic oat i'm not even kidding. i've read this at least 4 times, never get bored of it.
@theedaythatnevercomes
"breathe out, so i can breathe you in"
"revelations"
"cherry waves"
"hold me 'til i die"
i thank the universe every day for introducing me to this blog. literally EVERYTHING is amazing but these are my absolute favorite ones.
@sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth
"record" has a pt 2 on ao3 (my absolute favorite)
"pretty as a vine, sweet as a grape"
"I dreamed of the places Iâve been with you"
"you got me good (I knew you would)"
"squeaky clean"
writing genuinely feels like "home" idk how to even describe it. so so many amazing fics, if i start listing all of them i'm gonna run out of room lol.
@southernimpala
"you know i'd do anything for you"
"midnight swim"
"backseat" "frontseat"
"all that's left are your walls..."
mia=shakespeare. such beautiful writing i can never get enough.
@wvyik
"the virgin problem"
you'll always be in my mind my sweet sofi </3
@holdinggrudges
"what's my flavor?" "dripping in my favor"
old but gold. never knew i needed vampire!sam this much until i read this.
@sacr1ficialang3l
"these crosses all over my body remind me of who I used to be"
my roman empire. i still think about this fic to this day.
@kblognar
"gorgeous morning"
"cereal and coffee"
@plasticflowersinahistorycemetery
"strange eyes" pt I pt II
@chxrrywines
"mean"
"assistance"
"sexxx dreams"
other amazing authors:
@violained LOVE the fluff fics
@filthgf my fav freak
there are so many other amazing authors here that i still haven't stumbled upon on. love every one of you for taking your time and doing this. you all are amazing im so proud of each and every single one of yall. never stop doing what you love.đ€
Summary: After a hunt leaves Dean with only one functional leg, the boys crash at the Singer house for two weeks until heâs back on his feet. Which means dealing with a needy Deanâand a sweet Sam, who canât seem to stop staring at you like youâve hung the moon.
CW: None? I think? Just so. Much. Pining. Childhood friends to lovers, literally all fluff and yearning, sweet confessions, grumpy Dean, light drinking, some awkward Sam, slow burn!
WC: 9.3K
Based on this request!
Fourteen days.
Fourteen days that Dean Winchester has to be off his feet. Fourteen days that he canât walk, canât run, and canât drive Baby around like a maniac. Fourteen days that he canât hunt.Â
Hell, thatâs fourteen whole days that heâll need crutches to even go piss without assistance.
Sam had called you early in the evening, his voice tight, but clearly trying to sound casual, the familiar rumble of the impala cutting through every pause. You could hear the hesitation between every word. The way his voice dipped low, undoubtedly apologetic, almost mumbled like a kid waiting to be scolded. The way he repeated his âsorryâs far too many times to count, and how the line went uncharacteristically silent for a moment after youâd picked up on the third ring.
He explained Deanâs little problemânothing dramatic, heâd insisted, just a bad fall after tripping over a footstoneâbut enough to make getting around just about impossible, and to put hunting on hiatus until further notice. It really didnât come as a surprise when heâd ended his ramble session with a question, one spoken through a sigh: can we crash with you?
For fourteen days.
Of course, youâd said yes without wasting a breath. Youâve never quite had a back bone when it came to the Winchester brothers, and, hey, the company could be nice. Maybe. As long as you can survive the bickering.
Itâs nearing eleven when the impalaâs tires crunch over the long, twisty gravel driveway of the Singerâs house. You hear it before you see it, purring low like a cat (or, as Dean would say, a lion), sleek black frame blending into the twilight.Â
Youâd just finished tucking the corners of the stubborn new sheets on your fathers bed when the sound finds your ears, and you slip from the room just in time to hear the engine go idle, one hand swinging the door open before either man can even slide out of the car.Â
Sam rounds the impala first, slamming the door to the driverâs side shut with a bang, helping a grumbling Dean out the other side. He looks, put lightly, absolutely miserable. Youâre not sure youâve ever seen the older Winchester look so defeated, which is really saying somethingânot to mention the silly looking cast on his right foot, and the too-short crutches that he practically throws off the impalas bench.Â
âTook yaâs long enough,â you call, leaning against the doorframe, the humid night air already clinging uncomfortably to your skin, cicadas buzzing in the tall sea of grass. You hear Sam huff a laugh, and Dean shoots you a look, just as he slaps Samâs outstretched hand out of the way.Â
Miraculously, he manages to hobble towards the deck without tripping, but once he reaches the bottom of the stairs, he accepts defeat long enough to sling an arm over Samâs broad shoulders.
âThatâs âcause Sam drives like a freakinâ grandma in a school zone,â he complains, and Sam sends you a tired look, one that both says âplease helpâ and âIâm so sorryâ at the same time. You canât help but snicker.Â
Once all three Winchester boots hit the worn wood of the porch, Dean practically shoves Sam off of him like a petulant child. You have to fight off a snort. âHowâre you, uh. Howâre you feeling, Dean-o?â
âPeachy,â the man gripes, limping past you when you step back from the doorframe, appearing about two inches shorter from just how hunched over those damn crutches he is. He manages to make his way to a chair, some old leather thing thatâs peeling on the arms, and he plops himself onto it gracelessly. An irritated huff of air escapes his chest as he props his foot up on the coffee table.
âJust⊠peachy.â He glares at the offending appendage like itâs personally insulted him, and you grimace, before redirecting your attention back to the door, where Samâs hauling two duffels up the stairs that probably weigh about as much as a small child.Â
Sam, the sweetheart, lingers there for a moment like heâs afraid of tracking mud on the floor. He gives you that lopsided smile of his, soft, tired, and just a touch apologetic, before stepping inside. He scuffs his boots on the mat, setting the bags by the door, his arm brushing your shoulder as he moves past you.
He stands⊠closer than he usually does. Close enough that you can feel the heat radiating off of him, and you can practically taste his scent. Not in an overwhelming, cool-it-with-the-axe way, but in a holy-shit-you-smell-like-heaven way.Â
Youâre not sure which is worse.
He bows his head towards you, hair falling over his eyes. Itâs longer again, parted in the middle, tousled from travel or sleepless nights or Dean clunking him on the head for âhoveringâ. His flannel is unbuttoned too far at the top, probably because of the blistering heat thatâs been plaguing the country for the past week, sleeves pushed up to reveal forearms dusted with faint freckles and old scars.Â
âHey,â he says, gentle, simple. Quiet just for you to hear, like anything louder would cause you to shatter. âIâm sorry about⊠uh,â he gestures towards Dean, ââŠyeah. Sorry.â
You snort, shrugging, and you look towards Dean again: a stupid little pout on his face that reminds you of when you were kids.Â
âDonât be sorry. Things are quiet around here. I could use the entertainment,â you tease, turning back to Sam. Heâs still looking at you. His expression is a little hard to decipher; warm, tired, and so agonizingly soft that your stomach just about flips.Â
âYouâll be sick of it by tomorrow. Trust me,â he tells you, face cracking into a grin. Itâs one of those rare, unrestrained ones that crinkles at the corners of his eyes, and makes his dimples pop adorably.
âProbably. Canât throw him out now, though. I did up Dadâs room for him, since heâs away on a hunt. Said he wonât be back for a few weeks.â You nod your head towards the hall, before glancing up at him with an expression thatâs nothing short of mischievous. ââŠHe even has shower rails in the bathroom. Planning to tell Dean I installed them just for him.â
Sam tries to hide his snicker by coughing into his hand, a soft sound thatâs more adorable than it has any right to be. He nudges you, his voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper as he leans in, just a little closer than probably necessary.
 Interesting.
âOh, Iâm sure heâll have plenty of colourful ways to say thanks,â he murmurs, amusement thick in his tone. He pulls back just enough to look down at you, his lips quirking again when he catches your smile. He stares, then must realize it, because you swear his cheeks turn a shade of pink. He swallows a little awkwardly, almost like heâs gone all nervousâhis palms sliding against the denim of his jeans.
Deanâs groan cuts through the moment like a freshly sharpened blade.
âAlright, whatâre you two whispering about?â he demands, squinting suspiciously between the two of you. Sam straightens up, still smiling, but he clears his throat, holding his hands up in mock surrender. You flick your attention to him, raising a brow.
âYouâre bunking in my dadâs room. Bathrooms attached, close to the kitchen, Sam and I only a yell away. Sound good?â
Deanâs expression flickers, green eyes narrowing with a funny mixture of irritation and resignation, before he slumps back with an exaggerated sigh.
âYeah, yeah. Sounds fantastic,â he mutters, before gesturing vaguely at his plaster-covered foot. âJust gotta figure out how to get there.â He shoots Sam a pointed look.
Sam, who was still hovering close enough for his elbow to brush your arm, rolls his eyes, exhaling through his nose. How heâs so patient, you have no damn clue.
âCâmon,â he deadpans, crossing the short distance to his brother, and hauling him up with a grunt. He grabs the crutches, which Dean had tossed to the side like they arenât a hundred goddamn dollars, pushing them against his chest. âLetâs get you to bed before you get us kicked to the streets for being a smartass.â
You watch them bicker for a moment, face twisted in a look of pure amusement, as Sam begins to guide him down the hall.Â
You busy yourself by poking through the linen closet, yanking out a blanket that doesnât smell like dust and death, tossing it onto the long, worn couch. You even slip up to your room just long enough to grab a pillow, one thatâs not lumpy on one side, chucking it onto the makeshift bed.Â
In the back of your mind⊠you hope it smells like you.
You make your way to the kitchen, pouring a glass of water, just as Samâs finished wrestling Dean into the bed. He joins you with a sigh that sounds a lot like a father whoâs just talked down his toddler from a tantrum. His palms together, a soothing gesture, and he leans against the counter with a tight-lipped smile that says âsee what I have to deal with?â
The look you shoot him then is a little sympathetic, but mostly delighted.
âSounds like youâve had a fun week,â you tease, lifting the glass to your lips for a quick sip. âCanât say I blame you for wanting to enlist some help.â
Sam exhales sharply through his nose, not quite a laugh, born out of sheer exhaustion, and he scrubs a hand over his face.
âFun,â he echoes, voice low, tired, and fond all at once. His eyes flick towards the closed door, Deanâs quarters for the next two weeks, before settling back on you. The way he softens is visible. âYeah. Thatâs one word for it.â
He crosses his arms over his chest, buttons of his shirt straining (not that youâre looking, or anything), and his shoulders slump, like heâs finally letting himself relax. Really relax. The kitchen light catches the earthy green flecks in his eyes when he tilts his head at you, gaze gentle in a way that almost makes you squirm.
Itâs warm. Steady. He looks at you like heâs tracing the shape of your face, and burning it into his memory. Not in a greedy, or outwardly obnoxious way; but in a way that makes your stomach swirl, and your throat feel strangely dry, and has you taking another sip from your glass. Silence stretches, and when he breaks it, it almost looks like he has to force himself out of his own head.
ââŠI owe you for this. Really,â he murmurs, voice low, thick like sticky-sweet honey. âIt means a lot. I donât know how toââ
âSam. You donât need to thank me,â you cut him off, maybe a little too quickly, but his expression remains sheepish. Like he doesnât quite believe you. Like itâs been trained into his soul that being there for him is a burden, not a blessing. âI miss having you guys around. Just like the old times.â
That earns you a smile.
ââŠYeah. Like the old times.â
By day three, youâve already adapted to your new routine.
Deanâs still whiny. He still yells for Sam every time he has to move so much as an inch, despite the crutches, which he insists were invented by the devil himself. He complained to you about the water pressure on day two, then again because his cast got a little wet, even though heâd wrapped it in some plastic bag you found under the sink. He even tried to scold you for feeding him ârabbit foodâ after youâd put some tomato in his burger.
As for Sam⊠if anything, heâs only gotten sweeter.
Itâs grown impossible for you to perform any household task without the younger Winchester offering his assistance. Heâs got his hands full with Dean, that much is clear, and yet? The second you step into the kitchen to wash up the dishes, heâs placing a big, warm hand on your wrist, and insisting you go sit down.
He helps with laundry. He sets the table before you eat. He wakes up extra early to brew coffee exactly the way you like it, and he apologizes each time Dean makes a snarky comment.Â
Even when Dean shoots him a look, one that you canât quite decipher, and he turns an adorable shade of pink.Â
The day had gone by quick. It rained, for the first time in nearly a week; meaning you spent most of it inside, with some old book open over your thighs, your legs kicked up on the edge of the couch. Dean stayed in his roomâprobably watching some stupid movie (one that hopefully wasnât erotic, for your sanity)âwhile Sam kept you company.Â
And by keeping you company, you mean stealing glances at you over a book of his own every thirty seconds.
It was nice. Comfortable. Almost domestic, in a way. Youâd slipped away to your room around ten, tucking yourself in bed with a racing heart and buzzing mind⊠only to be woken up at a quarter to two by the obnoxious sound of your phone ringing.
Unfortunately, for both you and your old man, heâd found himself in a rut on his hunt. The irritation in his tone was palpable as he described the sigil heâd found carved into the floor of some abandoned factory. Youâd done up a quick sketch in your notebook as he spoke, his words painting a picture, just as he shoots you a blurry image with the instruction of âitâs in one of my books, go find it.â
Great. Just great.
You migrate to the dining room, sitting at the table with eye bags that would make a raccoon jealous, a lukewarm cup of coffee, and a stack of lore books taller than you. One second, youâre squinting at the faded ink of some obscure Enochian ward, pen tapping on the page. The next? Thereâs warmth at your back, and a big shadow leaning over your shoulder.Â
âYou always up this late?â
âJesusâ!â Your entire body jolts, your pen clattering to the table, hair on your neck standing tall, heart pounding a mile a minute, the whole nine yards. But the second you turn your head, finding the tired, worried, (and apologetic) puppy eyes of Sam Winchester, you relax.
Completely.
You laugh, an embarrassed sound, dragging a clammy hand over your face, like thatâll do anything to scrape off the exhaustion. âSorry, didnât mean to⊠âm not used to company while Dadâs away.â
âNo, Iâm sorry,â he smiles, sheepish now, eyes laced with sincerity. âDidnât realize you were so jumpy. Bobby doesnât sneak up on you enough, huh?â
âYou say that like he could. He walks like his feet are made of lead.â
Sam snickers, taking your newfound relaxation as a sign he can lean in closer. Close enough that you can smell the faded, masculine scent of his soap, the hint of minty toothpaste in his breath, and feel the warmth of his skin radiating through his thin t-shirt.Â
âWhatâre you doing, anyway?â His hand settles lightly on the back of your chair, fingers brushing your shoulder by accident (or not), as he squints at the page, a frown pulling at his lips. âYouâre not⊠youâre not hunting, are you?â
You cock your head to the side, just enough to look at him.
âNo. Well, not me. My dad called. Heâs at a dead end, nâ wants my help figuring out the origin of these sigils.â You nudge your journal towards him with your index finger, and he hums. Heâs so close you can almost feel the vibration. ââŠOnly problem is that heâs a fuckinâ lore hoarder. I donât even know where to start.âÂ
âOh.â
His brow furrows, silence falling between you for a fleeting moment. His eyes narrow.
âThatâs⊠not Enochian,â he murmurs, shifting his weight, his chest pressing against your back for just a second before he catches himself, and pulls back. ââŠUh. Sorry.â
His fingers tap absently against the chair, restless, thinking, maybe a little indecisive, before he exhales sharply, dragging a chair up beside you. His knee bumps yours as he folds himself next to you, elbows braced on the table, eyes scanning the symbols with quiet intensity.Â
You tilt your head, opening your mouth to speak, but heâs faster.
âThese letters look more like Latin to me. Maybe even some Hebrew,â he muses, turning to look at you. That sharpness in his gaze seems to soften almost immediately. ââŠYou need some help?â
His voice is soft, careful, like itâs not just an offer. Like he wants to stay.
âYou sure? Itâs late. You donât have toââ
âIâm sure,â he states, thumb skimming the edge of those yellowing pages of the book spread open in front of him like he needs something to fidget with. His voice drops, quiet, warm, into something so gentle that your heart just about skips a beat. ââŠYouâre exhausted. Let me help. Please.â
Yeah.
Itâs not quite possible for you to say no to that.Â
You donât respond right away, not with words, at least. If the conflict shows on your face, Sam doesnât mention it. He doesnât scoff, or even look annoyed. No, instead, he simply⊠watches you. His eyes are soft, encouraging, expression warm with lingering sleep.Â
And when you finally nod, leaning back in your chair, he smiles. Not wide, or with teethâmore of a quiet, gentle thing, that makes his face light up in the best way, and displays those sweet dimples when the light hits his face just right.
He moves slowly, turning your journal back towards you, his shoulder brushing yours as he leans in.
Itâs electric.Â
âSee how the letters curve here? Itâs more like a hook, rather than a smooth arc.â He traces the shape lightly, his fingertip just hovering over your work, like heâs afraid to smudge the ink. ââŠThat tells me itâs not Enochian. The Enochian alphabet is more⊠round. Iâm thinking this is ancient Hebrewââ he points at a letter, ââand see these circles? Thereâs even some Malachim script.â
You hover as he explains, nodding, and⊠yeah. Heâs right. Of course he is. Your lips part in an inaudible âohhhâ, your own hand moving to follow his in its silent trace, fingers brushing his.Â
He pauses. You see it, or, more accurately, you feel it. The way his breathing seems to freeze for a moment, before coming out in a jagged exhale that fans over your cheek, his body pressed so close to yours. He shifts, knee brushing yours again; to move away? To get closer?
You canât be sure.Â
ââŠSo, not Enochian. A combination of other things. Youâre thinking, what⊠The Lesser Key?âÂ
âYeah. Maybe,â he murmurs, âor some kind of interpretation. Mind if IâŠâ He trails off, long arm stretching over you to brush the worn leather spine of a book stacked next to you. His touch is careful. Thoughtful. And when you nod, he hums gratefully.Â
You watch as he pulls the book from the pile, already flipping ahead to the intended section like heâs read it a thousand times before. Two long fingers trace the faded ink over each page, each one silverfish bitten, bleached with time, his soft eyes searching. And when he finds what heâs looking for, he stops abruptly, pressing his fingertips over a pale illustration.Â
âThere.â
And there it is.
Maybe not exactly. Some of the letters look reversed, like they were intended to be written backwards. A couple of the symbols etched into the sigil are written cleaner, sharper, but⊠yeah. The main idea is there, and thatâs enough for you.
âWell, holy shit.â You huff an impressed laugh, settling just a little closer to him. âThanks, Sam. Youâre good. Really good,â you nudge him with your shoulder, âI see why Dean keeps you around.â
He chokes out a laugh of his own, soft and surprised, and ducks his head, rubbing at the back of his neck like heâs suddenly shy. His fingers linger there, tapping over his nape, but heâs not looking at the book anymore.
Heâs looking at you.
âYeah, uh. Anytime,â he murmurs, simple, but sincere. His eyes flicker over your face, lingering on the tired shadows under your eyes, before he finally moves, extending his free hand out to hold the back of your chair. Those pretty fingers twitch, like he wants to go further. Be bolder. Run his palm over your back, touch, comfort you the way heâs wanted for years.Â
But he doesnât. Not yet.
âItâs not an exact match. But Iâd guess itâs the same demon, or same category, at least,â he adds, a sweet flush creeping up his neck, like your sudden silence is suffocating him. âI can keep digging if you want. Find something more accurate.â
âNo.â You cut him off quickly, and he frowns, face twisting into an expression that reminds you far too much of a kicked puppy. Itâs both adorable, and a little heartbreaking. âYouâve just saved me about six hours of staring at lore until my eyes fall out of my skull. Itâs two in the morning. Go to bed, Sammy.â
The corner of his mouth quirks, and you swear he looks even more embarrassed than before. Of course, though, because heâll never quite let it go, he still mumbles out a near-silent, âitâs Sam.âÂ
He lingers like heâs seconds away from arguing with you. Fortunately, you win in the end, and he pushes up from the table, stretching his arms behind his back with a quiet groan. His shirt rides up just slightly, just enough for you to catch a glimpse of skin above his waistband (again, not that youâre looking), and when he lowers his armsâhe places his palm on your shoulder. Squeezes. Even when his face heats up, and his pulse races so quick, he wonders if you can feel it.
âFine. But⊠get some sleep, okay?â
He doesnât wait for an answer. Instead, he pads silently back towards the couch in the other room, leaving that undeniable warmth to prickle beneath your skin.Â
It takes until day six for Deanâs constant complaining to claw its way beneath your skin, and in your defence, half of it was because of the heat.
As it turns out, the rain had served to be nothing but a short-lived sense of false relief, because not a day later, another blistering heatwave hit. Full force.
More than hot enough to make your shirt cling to your body like a second skin, for the horizon to look all hazy like youâre staring at it through clear water, and to make the older Winchesterâs whining just that much more irritating. Thankfully, both for your well being and Deans, youâd plotted your escape to the junkyardâbecause that way, you could strangle the fucked-up wiring in your old Trans Am, instead of his sweaty throat.
You stand half hunched over the open hood of the car, damp tank top rubbing uncomfortably against your sticky skin. Your sweaty hands fumble with the socket wrench as it slips from your grasp, hot metal heating your palms like it just wants you to snap. Your molars dig into your cheek, knuckles white, fingers already grease stained, a string of curses slipping out between irritated puffs of breath. Nothing about it should be difficult, youâve disconnected a thousand batteries before, but thereâs something about the goddamn heat that has your jaw tensing and your fist tightening.
âYou sound just like your father.â
You hadnât even heard Sam approach, curse his stealth, his voice cutting through your exasperation with a jolt. Luckily for you, you donât startle quite as hard as the other night (and if you had, you surely wouldâve clunked your head on the hood), but you still let out a groan, bowing your head with an exaggerated shake.
âDo you take pride in your ability to scare the living hell out of me, Winchester?â you tease, cocking your head towards him, pointing the offending socket wrench in his direction.
Sam grins, bright and very unapologetic, the bastard, as he comes just a little closer. He leans against the fender, his arms crossed over his chest. He has the sleeves of his flannel rolled up to mid forearm, revealing freshly sun-kissed skin, and a glittery sheen of sweat.
âMaybe,â he admits shamelessly, tilting his head, which earns him a playful glare. His hair sticks to his forehead slightly, damp from the heat, and he shakes his head absently to swipe it back. âYouâre the one who keeps letting me sneak up on you, though.â
You roll your eyes, finally laying down that stupid wrench, and Sam takes the opportunity to just⊠look at you. Really look at you. His gaze flicks over your face, lingering at the sweat beading at your temple, before dropping to the way your tank top clings to your shoulders, the smudges of grease that stain your arms.Â
The moment you catch him, though, you swear his cheeks turn just a little more red, his brows furrowing into something almost sheepish.
âI, uh. Here,â he chokes the words out, extending his arm towards you in a stiff, mechanical motion, a cold plastic water bottle clutched in his hand.Â
The sight damn near brings you to your knees.
You take the bottle with a blissful âthank youâ, the icy condensation soothing your overheated palm like balm to a wound. Still, you donât drink right away. The water has a faint sheen to it, almost cloudy, and you lift a brow, amused.
âYou drugginâ me?â
Samâs eyes shoot open comically wide, his head shaking before your words even fully land, and you canât help but laugh at the look of sheer horror on his face.Â
âWhat? NoâGod, no,â he blurts, just as you twist the cap open with a quiet snicker. âItâs⊠electrolytes. That powder stuff, yâknow? Itâs hot, ân I figured you wouldnât be drinking enough âcause youâre so damn stubborn. I thought about making you something else, like, a smoothie, since you love fruit, but I didnât know where you kept the blenderââ
âSam.â You cut him off gently, taking a swig. âThank you. Youâre sweet.â
For a moment, he just blinks at you, like heâs unsure of how to respond to the praise. Then he clears his throat, an awkward, punched out sound, before he jerks his head towards the engine.
ââŠNeed a hand?â
He doesnât wait for an answer before stepping up beside you, nudging your knee with his as he peers under the hood. His arm brushes yours, warm and solid, as he hums thoughtfully, like he has any clue what heâs looking at.
He doesnât.
You take another sip of your drink before setting it to the side.
âYâever replace an alternator, Sam?â you ask, and the crooked smile you receive is answer enough. Dean? Sure. He knows his way around an engine. And as for you, youâve been tearing your way through your fatherâs junkyard since you could walk. But Sam?
Yeah. No.Â
âI mean, uh. Yâknow, Iâve...â He tilts his head, considering the mess of bolts and wiring before him, before shooting you a sidelong glance, pretty eyes crinkling at the corners. ââŠNo.â
You snicker, picking the socket wrench back up, tightening your grip on the hot metal with slippery fingers.
âBut Iâve been told Iâve got a real talent for holding a flashlight,â he offers, voice dropping into that low, teasing tone that never fails to make your stomach flip. âAnd I wonât complain like a certain individual back in the house. Promise.â
A soft smile tugs at your lips, and for the first time in hours, you donât feel two seconds away from strangling someone.Â
âAh. Thereâs your real motive. Trying to avoid your brother so you donât bite his head off,â you joke, and he shrugs noncommittedly, telling you all you need to know. âNo need for a light, though. Not at this time of day.â
His smile falters.
You regret your words instantly. You didnât mean it like thatâGod, no, not like you were brushing him offâbut he looks almost hurt, and those puppy eyes are just lethal.
âWhy donât I teach you?â you suggest quickly. Surprise flickers across his face, and the sight makes your heart stutter. âItâs pretty easy,â you add, softer now, âand youâre a real quick learner.â
ââŠYeah?â he questions gently, almost like heâs expecting you to take it back, before the corners of his lips quirk right back up in a quietly pleased grin. He shifts closer, hovering over the engine, his hand sliding from the fender to rest just above the grille.Â
He doesnât look back at the car right away, though, no; he just⊠watches you for a second. He lingers on the small smudge of grease on your cheek, the little crease between your brows that always forms whenever youâre focused, the way your tongue swipes across your lower lip⊠before ducking his head with a nod.
âOkay.â
He exhales, almost a laugh, like heâs shaking off nerves. Rolling his sleeves up just a little higher over his elbows, he exposes the lean muscle of his forearms when he braces his palms back on the edge of the engine bay. The sun catches his tan skin, warm and shining under the golden light.
You swallow. Hard.
ââŠWalk me through it?â he adds after a moment, breaking your trance, and you have to shake your head lightly to refocus, before nodding as your confidence slips back in place. You tilt your wrist forward, pointing at the battery.Â
âAlright. Weâve just gotta take out the battery first. Donât wanna fuck up the electrical, or give yourself a nasty shock. You just have to disconnect the cables. This one firstââ you gesture towards the back cable, Sam humming thoughtfully, âânegative. Thatâll break the ground circuit. Then you can take off the red one next, remove the hold-down clamp, and lift it out. You with me?â
Sam makes a low, affirmative sound, his brows drawing together in concentration. He follows along, he really doesâbut when his eyes drift, he seriously canât help it. He takes in the cables first, committing them to memory, but his eyes wander to trace your fingers, up to the soft angle of your wrist before he can catch them.Â
And then heâs just looking at you.Â
âYeah,â he says. âI think so.â
You smile before continuing. âOnce the batteryâs out, youâve got to remove the serpentine belt. Thatâs not too bad. Loosening it can be a bitch, though.â The metal wrench tinks against the tensioner as you point, your head tilting towards him. âThen you can start working on the alternator. But thatâs hands-on work. Canât really explain it.â
You donât move to demonstrate. No, instead, you extend the socket wrench out in your overheated palm. An offer.
âHave at âer.â
Sam hesitates, a brief moment of almost-panic flickering over his face, breaking through his newfound ease. For a second, he just stares at the tool, at your outstretched hand, like he canât quite believe that youâre handing him the task. Like itâs some sort of test.
âMe?â he questions, stunned, and when you nod, he takes an extra beat to move.Â
His fingers close around the handle tentatively, warm and calloused, and you swear he has the slightest tremor. His thumb brushes yours as he takes it, a fleeting touch that sends a spark up your arm despite the sweltering heat; and this time, he lets it linger. Just a little.Â
He clears his throat softly before turning back to the mess of cables, rolling his shoulders like a pitcher getting ready to throw.
âYouâve got a lot of faith in me, I mean, if you ever want this thing on the road again.â He laughs, but the hesitation is still present, threaded with just a touch of Sam-Winchester-self-depreciation that twists at your heart.Â
You donât entertain it. Not this time. Instead, your hip drops to lean against the bumper as you turn your body towards him, arms folded across your chest.
âNah. I trust you.â
And for a heartbeat, Sam just freezes. The wrench hovers in his grip like heâs suddenly forgotten what to do with it. His lips part slightly, like heâs going to say something. But for once? He doesnât have a smart remark. He doesnât have a dumb joke to deflect with. He just blinks once, twice, gaze so damn soft it makes something deep in your chest ache.Â
Then, without a word, he leans forward, and gets to work.Â
The wrench clicks into place on the first bolt, his grip steadying, instinct taking over. He ratchets in careful yet powerful strokes, confidence surfacing, piece by piece. You watch closely: the way his bangs fall over his forehead, each quiet puff of his breath, the way the tendon in his forearm jumps with each back-and-forth pull. Samâs in his element, working, learning, and if it gives you a bit of a show?
Well, thatâs just a bonus.Â
On day ten, you finally crack open your first beer.
The living room glows with the soft light of a single lamp in one corner, the one thatâs bulb has gone a faded shade of orange, and that flickers every few moments. Empty glass bottles and half-full longnecks scatter the coffee table, Deanâs cast covered foot thrown haphazardly next to them, one good kick from sloshing foam onto plaster.
The three of you are sprawled out easily in the room, Dean in that old chair heâs claimed as his own, tipsy fingers picking leather from the armrest, while you and Sam share the tiny couch, close enough to feel the brush of his knee every time his leg bounces restlessly. Laughter flows freely through loose lips, paired with the heavy bass of some old rock track booming through your ancient speaker, filling the usually quiet room with a new kind of comfort.
âOh, come on, Dean. Load is good!â you manage between snickers with impressive seriousness, your heated debate about Metallica albums becoming equally as important as monster talk to your intoxicated mind.Â
âGood?â Dean drawls, whoâs already had double yet is somehow half as tipsy, voice thick with playful disdain. âThat shit is not Metallica. They went mainstream, Iâm telling you.â
He takes another swig from his bottle (his eighth? Ninth? Who even knows), and levels a glare at you like youâve just taken Baby for a joyride.
Sam, meanwhile, is slumped against the loveseat, warm and heavy in that almost-drunk Sam way where he leans into you just a little more than usual, like itâs as simple as breathing. One arm is thrown along the backside of the couch, fingertips tapping along to the beat, brushing your shoulder every so often when his hand slips limply. The other stays in his lap, fingers idly twisting around the neck of an open bottle.Â
He almost looks a little lost. Happy lost, you note, if that dimpled smile is saying anything.Â
âSeriously?â you groan, albeit dramatically, but thereâs no mistaking the way the corner of your lips curve upwards.
You take a sip of your beer, the liquid fizzing pleasantly on your tongue. The cold stings your teeth in a way that should be uncomfortable, but instead, seems to be just right.Â
âYouâre only sayinâ that âcause itâs newer. Youâre blinded by the classics,â you accuse, jutting out one finger from around the neck of your bottle, pointing it in the older Winchesterâs direction, before sparing a glance at Sam. âHelp me out here, would ya?â
Sam blinks, slow, buzzed, like the words take a moment to travel from his ears to his brain.Â
For a second, he just stares, lips slightly parted like heâs forgotten what the argument was about. His cheeks are flushed a pretty pink from the beer, warm from the golden glow of the lamp, his hair a little messy from running his fingers through it all night.
When he snaps out of it, finally, a lazy grin spreads across his face, and your stomach seems to flip even more than usual. He lifts his beer in some sort of salute, before taking a swig.
âItâs not⊠bad,â he says carefully, ever the mediator, wiping his lips with the back of his hand.Â
His eyes flick to yours as he says it, as if searching for some sort of approval, and he sure as hell gets itâyou flashing him a triumphant smile, landing your obnoxious âaha!â. Dean rolls his eyes so hard, you think they might fall out of his skull.
âDude, you always take her side,â he complains, hardening his gaze into something thatâs probably supposed to be scrutinizing.
âNo I donât,â Sam defends, sounding almost pouty, but itâs weak. Really weak.
âItâs âcause Iâm always right,â you butt in, giggling all over again, Samâs soft smile growing at the sound alone.
âYeah, no,â Dean decides, eyes flicking between you and his brother. âThatâs not why. Wanna know why? Itâs just âcause heâŠâ he trails off, slowly, voice dipping into something uncharacteristically quiet, and you feel the way Sam stiffens by your side. Hard.Â
They exchange a look, one you donât quite understand. Sharp, quick, silent Winchester communicationâlike they know something you donât. And when Dean speaks again, he waves his arm as if to brush you off.
ââŠWhatever. His opinions invalid, anyway. He likes freakinâ Bon Jovi.â
For a beat too long, you donât respond. Long enough to make the air in the room feel slightly unnatural, like itâs suddenly gotten thicker, grown from an easy flow to something a little suffocating. Deanâs words still hang between you, unfinished in a way that somehow makes them worse. He left space, too much space, leaving room for you to fill in blanks that you donât quite understand.
Your mind should be racing to reach it. Should be grabbing onto something, anything, but instead, every thought drifts lazily past, tangled and unhelpful, like puzzle pieces that almost fit together but never quite click.
And God, Sam⊠Sam looks a little like heâs about to bolt.
That snaps you out of it, quick, your brain catching a thought, flipping it over, and blurting out a response before it really settles.Â
âDean, even I like Bon Jovi.â
Deanâs gaze flicks back to you, thrown off just enough for some of that smothering tension to crack, even just a fraction. He looks at you, then Sam, then back to youâlike heâs trying to gauge if opening his mouth will get him punched or notâbefore giving you another scowl.
âYeah, well,â he mutters, rubbing the back of his neck in an attempt to shake off some of the pressure. âThatâs his influence.â
He sticks the neck of his bottle in Samâs direction, who seems to have relaxed a little, but just barely.Â
âHis poor, poor influence.â
âPoor? You could argue that Bon Joviâs classic, too,â you challenge, tilting your head, a half-smile tugging at your lips again. Youâre still trying to keep it light, even if something in the room still feels a little off.
Even if that something is right next to you, knee to knee, and radiating an intense amount of heat that you have to fight yourself not to lean into.
Dean opens his mouth, closes it, then huffs.Â
âVery poor,â he lands on, weakly. âJovi is the pop of rock. Nothing about that is classic, ân you know it.â
You scoff, which almost earns you a smirk, but it doesnât stick. Not really.
Because Sam still hasnât said anything.
You glance over at him, and yeah. Definitely off. Heâs stiff, posture tight like his muscles are locked in place, his shoulders just a touch too taut. His jawâs set hard enough to hurt, and his eyes are fixed somewhere past Dean like heâs trying to become one with the couch, or maybe just disappear entirely.
âSammy.â You nudge him with your elbow, a quick, gentle motion, and he startles like youâd jammed a knife between his ribs. He bows his head to look at you, loopy-eyed from that alcohol induced haze, cheeks still a flustered red.Â
He doesnât even correct you this time.
ââŠHm?â
âAre yâgoing to defend yourself,â you ask, voice tipping into a more teasing register, watching him just a little closer, âor just let him slander you?â
Sam doesnât respond right away. His grip on his bottle loosens just a touch, thumb dragging lazily along the peeling label as his gaze flickers down, then back to you. Then he huffs. Shakes his head. And suddenly, a small, familiar smile tugs at his lips again, dimples creating pretty little indents on his still pink cheeks.
ââŠYou love âLivinâ on a Prayerâ, Dean.â
You snicker, Dean groans, and Sam seems to relax in a way that helps you breathe easy again. The tension doesnât disappear, not entirely anyway, but it loosens, unwinding like a knot pulled in the right direction. And when Sam takes another sip of his beer, eyes flicking to you, thereâs something softer in it now. Something that wasnât there a moment agoâor maybe something he just couldnât quite hide this time.Â
âYeah, yeah,â Dean concedes, waving both of you off, planting his now empty bottle on the coffee table with a heavy thud. âYouâre both still wrong. Iâm just outnumbered.â
âRightâŠâ you drawl, still giggling, and Sam lets out a real laugh this time. The kind that lights up his entire face, and makes your chest tighten without even realizing it.Â
The music hums into another solo, the room settling back into something familiar. Sam shifts, just slightly, and his fingertips brush your shoulder in soft, rhythmic circles where his armâs draped along the back of the couch.
And this time, he doesnât pull away at all.Â
On day fourteen, itâs your turn to scare the soul clean out of Samâs body.
You wake up early, too early for most, before the sun has even fully breached the horizon. The sky is still a faded pink, the world sitting quietly, where everything feels as though itâs paused and waiting. The airâs already warm, already heavy, but itâs not suffocating yet; itâs gentle. The kind of warmth that settles over your skin just right, or glows through your kitchen blinds as you brew a pot of rich coffee.
When you shake Sam awake, he startles. Of course he does. Hunters never quite wake easy. Thereâs a flash of immediate alertness in his eyes, maybe a little bit of panic, before it fades into soft recognition. And as it turns out, it doesnât take much convincing, if any at all, to get him to follow.
And so your short journey begins.
You walk side by side in an easy, peaceful quiet, the kind that doesnât really need any filling. The fields stretch endlessly around you, overgrown grass tickling your legs, the odd car or rusted-out part scattered around every corner. Remnants of old memories, of laughter-fueled moments that you hold oh so close to your heart.Â
Then the trees cast cool shadows as you move through the woods, ducking under low branches that force Sam to practically fold himself in half, step over fallen logs, and push through bushes that scrape your knees, practiced like youâve done it a thousand times before.
Because you have.
Eventually, you reach it. The two of you lie out the old blanket youâd packed, right where the trees clear out, a quiet lake opens up, and the land dips into something almost hidden just for you. Itâs the kind of place no one would ever find unless they really went looking. The place that was always just⊠yours. Yours and Samâs.Â
You lean back into the blanket, your hair fanning across worn fabric as you let yourself relax, flipping open your journal, graphite smudging against the curve of your palm as you begin to sketch. Sam settles beside you, the movement quiet, unhurried, and so damn familiar. Neither of you speak, not at first, and neither of you really have to.Â
The lake is still, in that glassy, undisturbed sort of way, except from the occasional ripple from a fish breaching the surface, or a leaf falling from a nearby tree. Morning light cascades over it in pretty golds and soft blues, shining in a way that makes everything feel a little softer around the edges.
Itâs all so⊠familiar.
Every rock, every tree, every incline in the field has a memory attached. Itâs the place you used to go all the time as kids, after school or when the pressure at home got too heavy. Escaping out to the hills like you werenât the children of hunters, but two regular kids who liked skipping stones and splashing water, or two teenagers who would sneak a couple beers from your fathers fridge. The place that held all of your goodbyes, before John would snatch the boys away for months, and you wouldnât hear a thing until they returned just a little older, a little rougher.Â
It makes this feel like goodbye all over again.
Next to you, it seems Sam might be thinking just the same thing. He doesnât say it out loud yet, but he just breathes it all in, mapping the space around him like a trail he knows better than the back of his hand. He watches the birds fly from tree to tree, takes in the scent of damp earth and wild flowers, listens to the way your pencil scratches lightly against your paper.Â
Eventually though, he turns to look at you instead.Â
His gaze lingers in a way that shouldnât feel as heavy as it does. He doesnât look at your journal, or the way your hands grip your pencil. No, he stares at your profile. Your relaxed expression. The way your hair frames your face, the slope of your nose, the soft bow of your lips. A soft smile tugs at his own as he quietly slips down to his elbow beside you, closing some of that space so naturally it could be framed as unintentional.
But now, you know better than that.
Your pencil glides across the paper in deep strokes, before your fingertip darts out to smudge the graphite, blending it into something softer. You try to ignore his gaze. You really do. But you can feel itâand it makes your heart thump like a drum against your ribs, flutter in a way you can feel up in your throat.Â
Slowly, so slowly as to not break the quiet, your pencil lowers to rest between the pages, as you turn your head gently to the side.Â
ââŠYou okay there, Sam?â
His expression does something a little complicated when you speak. It softens into something sweet, the way it always does when you meet his gaze, but at the same time, it almost gets heavier. He gives you that damn look, that puppy-eyed stare, the one that makes your chest warm with affection so intense, itâs near impossible to stifle.
âYeah,â he murmurs, his voice still a little rough from sleep, or maybe just emotion he hasnât quite faced. âJust⊠thinking.â
His knee brushes yours as he shifts, bending it where it rests over the blanket so he can look at you more fully. It doesnât feel like an accident, not this time, and he certainly doesnât rush to pull it away.Â
âThinking?â you echo. âAbout what?â
Sam exhales, a quiet, shaky breath, like the question weighs on him.
âAbout⊠this. Staying here. How itâs coming to an end.â His voice comes out careful and almost measured, too measured, like heâs trying to mask that undercurrent of sadness thatâs already starting to ache. âI couldâve sworn two weeks felt so much longer when we were kids.â
Fourteen days was never meant to last forever. You knew that. And yet, sitting by the lake, surrounded by old memories, it feels a little like time has slipped through your fingers like the sunrise melting into noon.Â
Your relaxed smile fades into something a little more sullen, even as warmth clings to your skin, both from the sun, and the barely-there touch of his knee.
âYeah. It did.â You swallow, forcing yourself to look away briefly, like thatâll do anything to loosen the pressure in your chest. You sit up a little further, pushing onto your elbows, and your journal slides off your lap, pencil rolling into the overgrown grass.Â
ââŠYou know you donât need a reason to just⊠visit, right?â
For a moment, the words just⊠sit. And youâd expected just that.
Because the Winchesters donât do things like that. They donât go on hunt-free road trips, or lazy Sunday afternoons, or spontaneous visits unless blood is involved. Their lives are simple, that of a hunterâs: case files, salt rounds, and constant movement from crisis to crisis with no room for reunions.Â
And you know that. You really do. And yetâŠ
âI just mean⊠you donât need to be hunting. Or injured.â Your fingers curl into the blanket below as you find his eyes again. âYou donât need to justify it. You can just⊠come.â
His throat works as he swallows hard, and he turns towards the water for a fleeting second, like heâs anchoring himself against a wave of emotion threatening to spill over all at once.
âI donât want to impose,â he lands on, slowly, spelling out the syllables. Bracing for rejection. âThis is Bobbyâs place. Your place. Itâs safe. Iâm not⊠Dean and I canât justâŠâ
He huffs, frustrated, shaking his head.Â
âSam,â you start again, still gentle, voice so low, it almost gets lost in the passing breeze. âIâm saying I want you guys here.â
Silence falls. The trees sway with a soft gust of wind, and the pages of your journal flip by your side, but you donât worry yourself about losing your place. You donât tear your gaze away. You canât. And when you speak again, your voice comes out more firm than before.
âIâm saying I want you here.â
He doesnât respond right away, barely even blinks. Your own gaze finally slips away from his, dropping to your lap, then back out to the lake aheadâand you let out a breath thatâs almost as frustrated as his own.
âI meant what I said when you first got here. I miss having you guys around. So much,â you whisper, and the words seem to catch in your throat, shaky and thick enough to ache. âI donât⊠I donât want this to be goodbye for the next six months. I donât want to watch the impala pull onto the road and wonder when Iâll see your face again. I donâtâGod, Sam, I donât⊠I canâtââ
âHey.â His voice slices through your words like the worldâs softest blade. Â
âYeah?â
ââŠCan I kiss you?â
You donât answer right away. You think you doâyour brain sends the signal, your lips partâbut nothing actually comes out. The moment hangs there, frozen, like youâd pressed pause on the world, and forgot to press play again.Â
The words seem to replay in your head on repeat. Not once, not twice, but over and over and over, as you stare at him like if you look hard enough, the universe will rewind like some cruel joke. Because this is Sam.Â
This is Sam, and heâs just asked if he could kiss you.Â
Youâre not sure how long your hesitation lasts, but itâs long enough for Samâs eyes to widen. For his muscles to go tense. For his face to crumble like heâs just fucked up, really fucked up, and for him to lean away like heâs about to pull back. You donât let him.Â
Because when your response finally comes, it has nothing to do with words.Â
You surge forward, capturing his lips with so much intensity that you get the brick wall that is Sam Winchester to sway. He inhales into it like he wasnât expecting it, like it takes a moment to register, but once it does, he melts. Completely.
Itâs like every nerve lights up all at once. Warm and electric and so damn right that your head spins, and your stomach flips.
Itâs sweet. So damn sweet.
He kisses you back slowly, cautiously, like heâs terrified of messing things up; but with so much tenderness that it steals the air straight out of your lungs. Thereâs no rush, no urgency, just quiet wonder. Like the moment is fragile, and all either of you want to do is preserve it forever.
And when he finally pulls back, just enough to suck in a deep, lingering breath, he rests his forehead against yours. His eyes half lidded, and so full of adoration that it would bring you to your knees if you werenât already so reclined.Â
ââŠYou okay?â he questions, voice barely above a breath, as he searches your face for even the smallest ounce of doubt. He doesnât find any.
âPerfect.â
He nods, and then heâs leaning in this time. Every muscle in your body relaxes the moment his lips slot against yours again, giving way to something warm and almost pliant. His hands rise, slow and tentative at first, before he cups your jaw with infinite gentleness. Two warm palms brush your cheeks as he tilts you impossibly closer, his fingers spanning the length of your face, his thumbs brushing sweetly over the delicate curve of your cheekbone in a clingy way that just about makes your eyes water.
And for a while, thatâs all there is. You, him, the quiet rhythm of your breathing as your lips collide, the breeze ruffling through the field, and the soft rippling waves in the lake.
When you pull back again, itâs not that either of you want to, and you can feel it in the way he hesitates. The way his thumb traces your face, the way his lips linger a fraction too long before parting from yours. He doesnât go far. He stays close enough for your noses to brush, for his bangs to tickle your forehead, and one of his hands never leaves your cheek.
Thereâs a faint, disbelieving huff of a laugh that comes from him, and after a moment of shockâone of your own follows.
âOkay,â he murmurs, like heâs trying the words out, testing his reality. Testing if this is all real. âOkay.â
Your hand shifts where it rests between you, brushing against his wrist. He stills for a second at the contact, instinctive, and you feel his hesitation in his breath. But then he softens. Turns his hand. And finally, he slides his palm just enough so his fingers can lace between yours. Careful, so careful, like heâs still not quite sure if heâs allowed.
You squeeze, and he squeezes back.
âIâm not⊠good at this,â he admits, gaze dropping briefly to stare at your interlocked fingers, and his thumb brushes gently over your knuckles. âShowing up just because. Having a life off the road.â
Your smile lingers, but your gaze searches his, just for a second. âYou donât have to be good at it. But⊠Iâll say it a thousand times if I have to. I just want you here. I want⊠all of it.â
âAll of it,â he echoes, and he lifts his head again, expression so warm, you feel like you could melt. His hand lifts from your cheek, only to tuck a loose strand of hair behind your ear, holding just a moment longer than necessary. ââŠIâm not good at this, but I want to try. For you.â
âFor us,â you correct, and he smiles so hard, the golden shine of the sun catches on his dimples.Â
âYeah. For us.â
AN: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SAMMY đđ„ł as a gift to all the Sam lovers, here is almost 10K words of pure fluff.
This one is pretty different from my other work, honestly, lol, and I made up some demonology here thatâs definitely inaccurate, so enjoy being thoroughly confused there (I was too). But I hope everyoneâs had a great Sam day đ€
(Dividers from @cursed-carmine)
Taglist: @spectralgalaxygauntlet @vfwwm (Iâm doing this the next day, Iâm so damn sorry)
â â â â đ”â§âË â đđđ đđđđđđđđđđ â â as â â pâlinks. â â
explicit content ahead â â â â â âĄâžâžâ â â â credits to all the links on x â â
ââ aftermath at the motel, â â he's too big 4 u, â â humping on him, â â riding sam after a bad case, â â sam is just a simp for your body, â â another pair of undies ruined by ur pervbf!sammy, â â jerking sam off over his stanford room, â â your first sextape together, â â
ê€ summary: youâre a sharp-tongued hunter with a secret⊠one that makes you the monsterâs perfect target. when things get tense, sam figures it out⊠and decides itâs time to solve the problem himself. very thoroughly.
⯠warnings: mdni!! explicit content, virgin! reader, soft dom! sam, p in v, oral sex (fem! receiving), emotional intimacy, consent focused, aftercare so sweet youâll rot, mentions of fear/paranoia tied to virginity, dean walking in and mentally combusting, so slight voyeurism.
⯠notes: the bitch is back at it again!! also?? what the fuck is up with me writing so many virginity plots specifically for sam winchester. idk. guess.
you werenât new to creepy towns, god knows youâd seen more than your share of cornfield nightmares and rusted playgrounds. but the second the impala rolled through the cracked welcome sign, something about the place just felt wrong. it wasnât the broken sidewalks or the way the trees seemed too still, it was the air. stale. held breath kind of wrong.
ââwelcome to morrow creek. population 1,206.ââ you squinted out the window, voice flat with disdain. âcute.â
dean snorted from the driverâs seat, tapping the steering wheel with a finger. he was already bored. âbet they sell nasty homemade jam.â
âthree women,â sam muttered from the passenger seat, flipping through the thick folder of clippings in his lap. âall under twenty-five. found dead in bed, no forced entry, no signs of struggle, uh, local cops think itâs a carbon monoxide leak. but each of âem..â he paused, glancing back at you. âthey were all virgins.â
the word dropped heavy between the seats, even though dean chuckled like it was just another day at the office. âso.. weâve got a purity-sucking monster. awesome. whatâs next, a ghost nun with mommy issues?â
you leaned your head against the cold window, lips quirking into a smirk that felt a little too tight. âwell, good thing none of us fit the bill, right?..â
dean laughed under his breath, but you felt samâs eyes flick back to you, too quick to mean nothing. you didnât meet his gaze. instead, you stared hard at the road and let your smile fade.
the motel was standard horror-flick material, though. the three of you tossed your bags into one of the two-bed rooms and you immediately claimed the lumpy couch in the corner before the brothers could bicker about it.
âiâll take the death trap,â you said, dropping your bag with a thud. âiâve had worse.â
dean smirked, eyeing the couch like it owed him money. âsuit yourself, sweetheart. hope you like springs in your spine.â
sam didnât say anything, just watched you with an unreadable expression he got when he was thinking too hard. âyou sure?â he asked after a beat. his voice wasnât pushy, it was gentle, as if he wasnât asking about the couch at all.
you raised an eyebrow, already pulling out the iron blade you kept tucked beneath your jacket. âdonât worry about me, sammy. iâm not exactly delicate.â
that earned the tiniest smile from him, but his eyes didnât let go of yours right away. you turned your back before it could linger.
the three of you spent the afternoon digging through the townâs pathetic excuse for a library. sam and dean did their usual tag-team, sam sweet-talking the clerk for access to records, dean bitching about how much dust was on the damn files. you tucked yourself into a quiet corner and started scribbling connections, your fingers stained with ink and that familiar buzz of adrenaline humming under your skin.
you were good at this. better than good. youâd learned from the best, but you had your own rhythm now, your own gut instincts that whispered before the lore caught up.
you leaned over the table and tapped your notebook with the back of your pen. âlook at the dates. all three deaths were on the waxing crescent. always between midnight and 3 a.m., always in their homes. no signs of entry. that means itâs either incorporeal, or itâs being let in.â
dean leaned over your shoulder, and you caught the faint scent of his cologne. âdamn,â he muttered, lips close enough to your ear to make your skin prickle. âyouâre getting scary good at this.â
âiâve been scary good,â you replied coolly, not looking at him.
you could feel sam watching you again, from behind the half-wall of old encyclopedias. you could feel he was trying to peel something back. you didnât give him the chance.
by the time night crawled in, the motel felt colder than it shouldâve. dean was lounging on his bed with a beer, flipping channels, while sam meticulously salted the windows and doors, making sure every corner was sealed. you added your own touch, drawing sigils on the mirror with charcoal, tucking your blade under your pillow, double checking the line of salt at the threshold until it looked right. you told yourself it was just muscle memory. that you werenât nervous.
but you were. not because of the hunt.
because of you.
because the second Sam said the v-word earlier, your body went cold. not because you were ashamed, or insecure, or anything stupid like that. you just hadnât wanted them to know. you hadnât wanted them to realize you were the kind of girl this monster wanted. pure, untouched. youâd spent years building yourself into something sharp and untouchable. and now, something out there could sniff it out like blood in the water.
you cracked open a beer and forced yourself to take a long sip, masking the shake in your hands with practiced ease. then you stood. âiâm beat. gonna crash early.â
dean waved you off with a lazy salute. âsweet dreams, killer.â
sam said nothing. just watched you walk out like he already knew something you didnât want him to.
your motel room was just a few doors down, but it felt like another planet once you locked yourself inside. you did what you always did. you locked the door, salted the windows, tested your knife grip, triple-checked the lines on the floor. but your chest still felt tight. your palms were damp. your skin felt⊠exposed.
you werenât scared of dying. that had stopped being your biggest fear a long time ago. what made your stomach twist was the idea that you might get chosen. that this thing might sniff you out, and suddenly sam and dean would know. theyâd look at you differently. pity you, protect you.
and you didnât want to be protected. you wanted to be seen as dangerous.
but right now? sitting alone in a dark motel room, knees pulled up to your chest as you stared at the door like it might explode inward, you felt like prey.
a knock broke the silence. your head snapped up.
âhey⊠itâs me.â samâs voice was low through the door, almost gentle. he already knew not to scare you more than you were.
you hesitated, heart hammering. âwhat the hell, sam?â
âi saw that expression when you left,â he said. âyou okay?â
the words caught in your throat. you didnât know how to lie to him right now. there was a long pause. thank fuck he didnât push.
you stood slowly, crossed the room on quiet feet, and undid the lock. your hand trembled just slightly on the doorknob before you opened it.
ââŠcome in.â
sam stepped inside slowly. honestly, he wasnât sure youâd actually let him. his eyes scanned the room, your over-prepared salt lines, the open blade on the nightstand, the half-drunk beer. then they found you again. that same look.
and that, somehow, felt even worse.
he stood in the middle of your motel room like he didnât want to make the first move.
âyou gonna say something?â you asked, voice quiet but sharp. defensive. if he touched the wrong nerve, you might shatter or explode. you werenât sure which.
samâs gaze softened a little, but it didnât lose focus. âdid you really come in here just to sleep?â
you turned away, busying yourself by pretending to adjust the salt line by the window. âwhat the hell does that mean?â
âyouâre scared,â he said, blunt now. ânot of the hunt, or the monster. of being its target. and I think you already know why.â
you felt your pulse in your throat, your fingers twitching at your sides. âso what? you gonna tell dean? put me on some kinda leash? lock me in the car like a liability?â
he was behind you before you even heard his steps, his voice brushed close to your neck. âno. iâm not gonna tell him anything. iâm not here to judge you. iâm here becauseâŠâ he paused, like he needed to find the exact words. âbecause if you are what this thingâs looking for, that means youâre in danger. and iâm not letting anything happen to you.â
you turned to face him, and suddenly he was close, his chest nearly brushing yours, his hand ghosting over the air between you. âyou donât get it,â you said quietly. âyou donât know what itâs like⊠walking around with this stupid secret. being the only one in the room who hasnât-.. who is-..â
âa fuckinâ virgin?â sam finished for you, gently but without hesitation. âyeah, i got that part.â
your cheeks burned, but you didnât look away. ââŠyou think it makes me weak, donât you?â
âno,â he said, voice low and certain. âi think it makes you brave as hell for coming out here and hunting with us anyway. for pretending like it doesnât matter when i can tell itâs tearing you apart inside.â
you felt something split wide open in your chest. a dam cracking. you were so tired of holding it in. of hiding behind sharp jokes and harder walls.
âi didnât plan on staying that way forever,â you murmured. âit just⊠didnât happen. didnât feel right. not yet.â
samâs thumb brushed your jaw. âand now?â
you swallowed. looked up at him through your lashes. ânow i feel like a goddamn target. like itâs this thing hanging over me and, sam, i hate it. i hate being afraid.â
his lips hovered close to yours, voice a whisper against your skin. âthen let me help.â
you stared at him. âyou donât have to-â
âi want to.â
there was no hesitation in his eyes. no lust-fueled pressure. he leaned in, mouth catching yours in a kiss that was patient but deep, like heâd been holding it back for too long. you melted against him before you could even think, hands grabbing the front of his shirt like it was the only thing anchoring you.
his tongue brushed yours and the groan he let out was filthy, like the taste of you knocked the breath out of him. âyou taste so fucking sweet,â he muttered against your lips. âbeen wondering what itâd feel like to kiss that mouth since you first mouthed off at me.â
you pulled back slightly, breathless. âthat was, like⊠day three.â
sam smiled, hand sliding down to the curve of your hip. âyeah. iâm patient.â
you tugged his shirt off, finally getting your hands on all that muscle he kept hidden under layers. his stomach taut under your fingers as he stepped you back toward the bed.
âyou sure about this?â he asked one last time, voice rough but gentle.
you nodded. âi donât want it to be fear that takes it away from me. i want you.â
that did something to him. suddenly he was all over you, mouth on your neck, hands gripping your thighs as he lifted you onto the bed like you weighed nothing. he kissed down your body like a promise. every touch was careful and intentional, but so hungry. and when he finally pushed your thighs apart and knelt between them, he looked up at you like he was about to ruin you.
âiâm gonna make this good for you,â he murmured, voice so deep it made your toes curl. âso good you forget why you were scared at all. so good it wonât matter that you waited this long.â
you barely managed to gasp before his mouth was on you. hot, skilled, tongue licking long deliberate strokes on your pussy. he was memorizing every single sound you made. you clawed at the sheets, moaning his name like a prayer, and he just held you open with those strong hands, eating you out. heâd literally die if you pulled away.
and when you finally came, shaking and gasping, he kissed back up your body, slow and sweet. âiâve got you,â he whispered, brushing his lips over your jaw. âlet me take care of the rest.â
sam moved over you like heâd been dreaming about it. until now, until your back was arched against the bed and his body was finally settled between your thighs, all warmth with pressure and want. the motel room around you felt like it didnât matter. the only thing real was him.
âyou good?â he asked again, voice wrecked and whisper-rough, his fingers brushing your cheek while his other hand slowly guided his cock along your folds, teasing. not out of cruelty, but to give you time to breathe.
you nodded, but your voice cracked a little when you said, âyeah. i want it.â
he kissed you again, slower this time, like he was trying to calm your heartbeat with his mouth. âgonna go real slow,â he murmured, forehead pressed to yours. âyou tell me if you want me to stop. you say the word, and i back off. no questions.â
âi wonât,â you whispered, hips already lifting to meet him. âi want you, sam. just you.â
the first push was gentle. he went slow, careful, watching your face the entire time, not even trying to hide how hard he was breathing. you were tight, hot, the stretch just on the edge of too much, and the feeling of him filling you had your eyes rolling back almost instantly.
âoh my god,â you gasped, fingers gripping his shoulders. âsam..â
âi know, baby. i know.â his voice was tight, controlled, but he was barely holding back a growl. âyou feel-fuck-you feel perfect.â
he paused once he was buried inside, letting you adjust, kissing your neck and running one hand slowly up your thigh like it would help you relax. âbreathe,â he whispered. âyouâre doinâ so fuckinâ good.â
you were trembling, half from nerves, half from the feeling of him, all of him, seated so deep inside you, stretching you open in a way that felt devastating and intimate all at once. you didnât even realize tears were brimming at your lashes until sam kissed one off your cheek. âyou okay?â he murmured, thumb brushing under your eye again.
âiâm perfect,â you whispered. âjust, holy fuck, donât stop.â
his hips pulled back slowly, and when he pushed in again, it was smoother. still deliberate, but deeper, more rhythmic, trying to find his pace with you, tuning his body to yours. you wrapped your legs around his waist and let your head fall back, moaning shamelessly as he started fucking you in deep, slow strokes that made your breath hitch every time he bottomed out.
âthatâs it,â he grunted, forehead still pressed to yours, sweat beading at his temple. âtaking me so fuckinâ well, baby⊠iâve got you. just let go.â
you couldnât think. couldnât speak. the way he was moving slow, his name kept falling from your lips in a quiet chant, the only word you could seem to remember.
samâs hand slid between your bodies, thumb pressing soft circles into your clit. you gasped, body jolting, and he smiled against your neck. âthat feel good, sweetheart?â he whispered. âyou like when i touch you like this?â
âyesyes, please, donât stop-â your voice broke again as pleasure started coiling hot and heavy in your belly. âiâm gonna, sam..â
âiâve got you,â he said again, voice so loving it hurt. âyou can let go. youâre safe.â
you came around him hard, clenching so tightly around his cock that he had to bite his lip to keep it together. your whole body tensed, then collapsed under him as you shook and gasped through it, and he held you like you were something precious, whispering through every twitch.
âthatâs it, thatâs my girl⊠fuck, baby, youâre so beautiful like thisâŠâ
he kept moving, chasing his own high now, breath stuttering as he fucked into you deeper, a little faster, but never rough. his face was buried in your neck, hand gripping your thigh, and when he came, it was with a full-body groan. he buried himself to the hilt, hips stuttering, panting like heâd just run a marathon.
and then⊠silence.
heavy breathing. the weight of him on top of you, solid and real and safe. you ran your fingers through his hair, and he let out the softest sound, content, like he didnât want to move.
he stayed draped over you, his hand still curled around your waist like he needed to keep you close in case you disappeared. you felt wrecked, in the best way.
after a while, sam leaned up on his elbow, pushing the sweaty hair off your forehead, looking down at you like you were made of fucking starlight. âyou still okay?â he whispered, and his voice was so gentle, so low and fond, it made your throat get tight.
âmhm,â you mumbled, already half-asleep, still spread out and naked beneath him. âi think you fixed me.â
sam chuckled, brushing his lips over your temple. âiâm a healer now?â
âliterally,â you sighed. âvirginity demon who?â
he kissed your jaw. âoh, the spirit is banished, alright. world saved.â
you rolled into him, lazy grin pulling at your lips. âone orgasm at a time.â
ââŠone?â
you blinked up at him, then immediately burst out laughing as he smirked like the smug bastard he was. âokay, chill, sam,â you groaned. âmy bodyâs not even functioning yet.â
âiâll give you thirty minutes,â he muttered, pulling you into his chest, tucking the blanket around both of you like you werenât still sticky and sweaty and fucked dumb.
âiâm gonna fall asleep like this,â you whispered, fingers drawing little shapes on his bare chest.
âgood. you should.â his voice was all honey again. âyouâre safe with me.â
and that was the last thing you heard before you drifted off, wrapped in samâs arms, thoroughly wrecked and absolutely ruined for anyone who wasnât a 6â4â soft-spoken demon hunter who fucked like he was trying to put your soul back together.
it felt nice finally falling asleep. your legs were tangled with samâs, your head tucked under his chin, and his hand was still splayed across your ass like it belonged there. which, to be fair, it did. the room was still warm with sex and body heat and whatever leftover cologne he wore that now lived in your hair.
until the door slammed open like it was kicked by a cop.
âyou have got to be kidding me.â
you screamed. sam jolted awake with military precision, reaching for the knife on the nightstand in one motion while covering you with his body in the next.
and standing in the doorway, framed by shitty motel light and holding a crumpled paper bag full of snacks, was dean winchester.
mouth open. face full of regret.
you just stared at each other.
ââŠdude,â sam said groggily, arm still around you like he didnât have his whole ass out under the sheet. âwhat the fuck.â
dean blinked again. ânah.â
he turned around immediately. stared at the wall. took a deep breath.
âoh, no, no no no, this is not happening. this is not how I start my fuckinâ morning. i got beef jerky and a coke and now I have to go pour bleach in my brain because my little brother decided to go all lust in the dust with you.â
you groaned, flopping onto your back and dragging the sheet over your head like a corpse. âplease kill me. please kill me now.â
âdonât tempt me.â dean yelled, still facing the wall with his arms out like he was trying to keep a crime scene untouched. âi trusted you! you were the normal one! you sat next to me during stakeouts! you made fun of him with me! what the hell?!â
âi donât think Iâve ever made fun of sam with you-â you started to say, but dean spun around dramatically, index finger raised like a furious little league coach.
âdonât lie to me now, sex goblin! i saw what i saw, and i canât ever go back from that!â
sam had the audacity to rub his eyes and mumble, âyou couldâve knocked, dude.â
âoh, donât you start,â dean snapped, pacing now. âiâve heard you. i knew you were in here. i was trying to be respectful. i thought, âhey, they probably just fell asleep watching TV, maybe theyâre sharing the room, maybe samâs just being weird and overprotective, maybe she had a nightmare..â BUT NO.â
he spun to face you both again, looking personally betrayed.
âyâall were out here doing the monster mash and i walked in ten seconds too late to stop my retinas from dissolving.â
you peeked out from under the covers. âwe didnât mean for you to find out this way.â
âoh really?â dean scoffed. âhow were you planning to tell me? group text? powerpoint? smoke signals from your fucking bedroom?!â
sam sighed. âdean-â
âno. no âdean.â i need castiel to erase the last ten minutes of my life.â
he turned back toward the door, paused dramatically, and looked over his shoulder with the most betrayed face known to man.
âi hope you know,â he said solemnly, âthat i will never sit on that bed again.â
summary: who knew sam liked it so much when you were in control?
pairing: sam x angel!reader (gn) | genre: hot smut !! mdni | word count: 7.4k
warnings: older!sam, sub!sam (ft. a lot of whining and other sounds), a lotta edging, unprotected sex (dont do this), grace-play + sam's newly discovered grace kink, marking (giving sammy hickies !!), dean being a pain, dom!reader (?), i think that's it
notes: wow, writing something that's not a request ???? @sorryitsmyfirstdayonearth and @aniresrene made me do it (thank you both !!). i took a bit of inspiration for some of this from a fic by @theedaythatnevercomes and her c'mon baby, get in fic :] as always, mdni with my smut !! and also as always, i'm too asexual for writing smut on the regular, this is not an open invitation to request heavy smut from me :]
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Thereâs something hot under your skin. It doesnât burn, because it canât. It doesnât singe or scorch, because it hasnât learned how. But it simmers, bubbling gently, a rolling ocean that laps along the shore in soft waves, curved and gentle like crescent moons on the sand. The longer you let it sit, the stronger it gets, coasting toward something like a boil that makes your skin hot and your stomach warm. It drips lower, a slow line of heat that lands heavy when it hits the pit of your core, spreading molten heat in a honey-slow crawl ever downward.
Across the table from you is the reason for your distress. Not that he would notice, of course, because youâve spent too many years taking the time to learn to cover it up. Heâs not in tune with the rhythm of your grace yet, canât notice when it flares around him, doesnât seem to realize how it burns stronger on days like these. Sam is many things, and unfortunately, oblivious to the way he makes you feel is one of them. Youâve learned you have to be painfully direct with him, because speaking in wraparound metaphors is never going to get your desires across. He needs facts, statements, full sentences that start and end with Sam, I need you. He needs you to be bold. So tonight, you will.
Currently, Sam is buried in a book with more pages than he has hairs on his head. Theyâre thin, brittle with age and filled with smudged handwriting that you know strains his eyes to read. If you listen close to the silence around him, you can fill it with whatever internal commentary he has on the text; anecdotes to the lines on the page, mental reminders to search for a connection in another book later. You file those notes away too, because two brains are better than one, especially when one belongs to an angel. Your memory is plenty good enough to handle the both of you, but Sam takes pride in how much he knows, and youâre not one to underestimate the power of knowledge.
You watch, fixated, as he raises a thumb to his mouth, wetting it with the tip of his tongue so he can better turn the pages, careful not to damage the ancient paper. Itâs a simple gesture, one youâve seen him do hundreds of times before on case files or poetry anthology pages, but for some reason it makes your face hot. You avert your eyes quickly, instead opting to trace the lines on the tabletop, listening to their stories. It doesnât tell you much, because it is just a piece of wood turned into a tabletop and carved with initials, but you can pretend thereâs a wise voice telling you itâs tale.
Your eyes follow the lines as far as they go, tracing them until they wind up at Samâs bare forearm. Those stupid bare arms, covering the ends to the forestâs stories, because heâs chosen to roll up the sleeves of his navy button-up to his elbows. Even from this distance you can count every mole on his skin, the freckles faded by age and made bright again by the summer sun. The faint hairs that curl like fern fronds across his skin, connecting his freckles the same way an astronomer might draw lines to connect the constellations in the sky. Thin, soft, etched into where they belong. Sam turns another page, the muscle under his skin rippling as he moves, your eyes tracking it the whole way from rest to motion to rest again.
Everything about Sam is soft in ways youâd expect it to be sharp. The lines and ridges of his bones and muscles under his skin are rounded and soft, somehow managing to be gentle without sacrificing their power. Where Deanâs hands are large, the bones thickening his fingers enough that you can see where one or two have been broken, Samâs hands are bigger yet but timid, a little shaky at times, always asking for permission to be big. The way he manages to round down the expanses of his shoulders both impresses you and makes you sad that he feels the need to take up less space. Even the way heâs just cleared his throat isnât harsh or cracking like it is for most people. Instead, itâs light, quiet, filling the space like it really is nothing more than just a temporary sound.
âYouâre staring,â he murmurs softly, barely looking up from his page.
âI am not staring,â you reply.
Sam huffs a laugh, grinning in that careful way that makes his dimple pop on his cheek. Itâs hard to see it now that heâs growing a bit of a beard, but you donât think you could forget what it looks like if you tried. Even now the soft divot is visible to you, pockmarking his skin like a little meteor fell into it, rounding it out and giving it meaning until it was something beautiful and kind instead of fiery. His eyes flick up from the page to your face and back again, the same path they make thousands of times a day.
âIf youâre not staring, then what are you doing?â
âThinking.â
âAbout what?â
âYou.â
Samâs eyes pause their trek across the page, coming up to meet your steady gaze for a second longer than normal. The longer he watches you, the more you see his expression shift from something relaxed into something strung, an animal ready to move. The lamplight flickers off him in waning waves of gold, his eyes shifting from a dark brown to something lighter, the colour of the worn wood on the table youâd been studying earlier, something golden he doesnât know exists swimming in them too. Sam looks away first, his cheeks dusted a pale pink, unable to hide the ghost of a smile that lands on his face every time he sees you.
âIâm not kidding,â you say.
âI know.â
He shifts in his chair, the movement disjointed and awkward, settling himself both deeper into the seat and also closer to the edge. Ready to get up and move at a momentâs notice, but making himself comfortable, like he can melt into it and disappear if you asked him to. One hand drifts under the table, the almost imperceptible sound of fingers rearranging denim reaching your ears. His hand drifts back up, fidgeting momentarily with the collar of his shirt before falling back to rest in his lap, book now forgotten. His legs stretch long under the table, ankles crossed and socked feet tapping a rhythm against the floor, eyes drifting anywhere but you.
âAre you done?â you ask, gesturing to his book.
Sam nods, clearing his throat a second time. âI can be. Why?â
You stare, your expression shifting into something deadpan and serious. âI can wait if youâre busy.â
âNo, no, Iâm not busy.â
âYouâre halfway through a chapter. You never stop reading halfway through a chapter.â
Sam shrugs, caught. âFirst time for everything?â
You absorb the information, standing from your chair in an abrupt motion that makes Samâs brows furrow as he watches you. Itâs not unlike you to move in a space like youâre not used to the space existing, but this is too precise for even that. Youâre moving on a mission, and Samâs starting to understand what it is.
âCome with me,â you say, holding out your hand and cupping his chin with it.
âWhere are we going?â
You nod in the direction of the hall. âYou are going to have a first time.â
Sam swallows, something that looks like uncertainty flickering across his features. You frown, leaning down to look him in the eyes, softening your expression into something you know he understands as gentle. Your eyes flick over him, from his worried expression to the shirt collar he still hasnât fixed, down his lightly freckled arms, to the lump in his jeans he was adjusting earlier. Perhaps youâve misread something. Maybe whatever fire simmers under your skin doesnât live under his; maybe youâve overstepped, crossed a line you know you should never cross, hurt the parts of him you promised you would never hurt.
âIâm sorry,â you say. âIf I was too direct.â
Sam waves off your apology with a hand, shaking his head slightly. âDonât apologize.â
âI made you uncomfortable.â
âNot uncomfortable. Very much the opposite of uncomfortable.â
Your face scrunches up, confusion etched into your features. Sam chuckles low, putting one of his hands on the wrist that still holds his chin in your hand. His thumb strokes up and down the back of your hand, drawing you in with the way that every touch of his does, promising everything good and more. When he turns his head slightly, his beard scrapes at your palm, scratching a surface itch and stoking the deeper one.
âBut you lookâŠuncertain.â
âNot uncertain.â
âThen what would you call it?â
Sam thinks, eyes flittering over your features, hesitating on your lips. His tongue darts out to wet his own, fingers tightening momentarily on your wrist.
âAnticipation.â
You hum, the sound vibrating through your chest to Sam just by how close you are to him. His knees tip open a little as you step forward, legs spreading just enough that you can stand between them. Experimentally, your hand tips low, trailing a faint path along the line of his jaw, down the side of his neck, brushing his adamâs apple that bobs when he swallows. Slowly, your fingertips brush the collar of the shirt heâd been playing with earlier, nails brushing half-moon shapes along what you can see of his collarbone. His breath hitches when you reach the dip at the base of his neck, a shaky inhale and exhale that you know is holding back something fuller.
âOkay,â you say. âAnticipation is good?â
Sam nods, the motion slightly detached. âYeah.â
âDo you like it?â
Samâs eyes gleam with something hidden that he keeps carefully locked away, slowly brimming to the surface under your heated touch.
âYeah. Yeah, I do.â
His voice is unsteady, like it was knocked off balance by a punch to the chest. Something about the reverent breathlessness of it stokes the pot from a simmer to a slow boil, foamy sea roiling under your skin, impatient as it waits. You watch Sam for a moment longer, studying the ridge of his brow under the light, the way it normally shades his eyes but now seems to push the darkness back for you to see his pretty hazel eyes watching you just as intently as you watch him. You brush your hand through his hair slow, raking it back from his forehead. He gives a soft, punched-out noise when your fingers catch on a knot and yank harder than youâd intended, his face immediately flushing pink.
âSorry,â he whispers when you remove your hand.
âDid it hurt?â
âA little.â
âBut you-.â
Sam holds up a hand to stop you. âSomething can hurt and feel good at the same time.â
You frown. âHow on Earth does that work?â
Sam chuckles, tipping into your hand with the weight of it. âI wish I knew.â
âDo you-. Can I do it again?â
Samâs eyes focus on you. âPlease.â
You follow the same path again, fingers running along his scalp like a rake as they pull his hair back, finding a spot near the top of his head that looks suitable. Quietly, you wrap two fingers around the roots, pulling just hard enough to draw out a low groan from the base of his throat, one that comes up from his chest and sounds like heaven. You move on to a new spot, repeating the same motion but slightly harder, earning yourself another groan, this one louder.
âWait- wait. Stop,â Sam pants.
You retract your hand immediately. âToo much?â
âNo, no. God, no. Just-. Weâre in the library.â
You nod, slow. âThere is no door.â
âRight.â
âAnd Dean could walk past.â
âRight again.â
âAnd you would like to be somewhere else.â
âThree in a row.â
You hum, grabbing Samâs large hand and pulling him to his feet. He goes a little wobbly, never expecting the strength you have over him, but he stands upright, slamming the book closed and shoving it down the table for Dean to put somewhere else. His hand falls again to the front of his jeans, making an attempt to adjust himself in case you come across Dean. You and Sam both know itâs probably pointless, but itâs the thought that counts.
Your steps on the bunker floor tread so light they barely make a sound, almost like youâre floating over the ground. Maybe you are, in a way, walking light and subtle and with the kind of gentleness that comes from being held up by wings. Sam walks so close behind you it would crowd if he were anyone else; he has a talent for existing shoulder to shoulder with you in your space and never leaving you feeling overwhelming. One hand hovers at the small of your back, his nose nudging at your neck while he lays soft kisses to the skin as you walk, your pace quickening the closer you get to his room.
Sam mutters something impatient when it takes you more than a second to open the door to his room, and you give him a half-hearted glare from the corner of your eye. He apologizes with an open-mouthed kiss to your pulse point, exhaling soft through his nose as he does, the heat of his breath curling against the skin of your neck. He nudges the door closed with his heel, the latch rattling lightly against the frame as it comes to rest, something Dean will no doubt complain about later, but neither of you care. The sound of wood hitting frame doesnât matter, the sound of socked feet on floor isnât important; the sound of panted breaths and increasingly heated kisses does.
You spin him around, so his chest is pressed to yours, slinging your arms around his neck and pulling him ever closer. His hands fall to your waist, smoothing up and down your ribcage, cupping them and stroking his thumb along the lower ribs in time with your breaths. Your fingertips find their earlier path to the base of his neck, scooping under his hair and bunching it up in your hands as you trail upward, inching toward the roots and tugging when you get there. The first few times only reward you with a huff of breath against your skin, but after some experimentation, you find the right section of his hair that drags a whine from his chest into the kiss.
Despite his size, itâs devastatingly easy to walk him toward the bed, using just a fraction of your strength to push him onto the mattress. His knees buckle when he reaches the edge, gripping your hips and pulling you down into his lap. Your knees land on either side of his hips, leading you to subtly grind yourself down on his growing hardness under the denim of his jeans. Each circle of your hips on his drags a moan from Sam, spitting it out into the air like heâs ashamed of the pleasure, afraid to let you know what he feels.
Eventually, Sam pulls away from you, gazing up at you with blown pupils and the most beautiful eyes youâve seen. His lashes tangle together as he blinks at you, doe eyes perfectly matching the flush on his cheeks and his kiss-swollen lips. Your hands make a path down his shoulder blades and around to his chest, palm landing flat over his heart. Samâs hands cup your face like angelic statues cup holy water, holding it like itâs rare, precious, something to be closely guarded. Softly, testing the waters, Samâs hips jerk upward, your lips parting for a sound that never comes.
âSam?â you ask, breathless.
Sam makes a noise in response thatâs airy and light, something you take for agreement but could easily have no meaning attached to it.
âDo you want to try something new?â
He freezes. âLike what?â
Your hips shift minutely, Samâs eyes squeezing shut in response.
âMaking you feel what I feel.â
âYou feel it different?â
You nod, the motion jerky.
âWhat kind of different?â he prods.
âMore feeling. More energy. Just-. More. Youâd like it.â
âOkay,â Sam whispers. âYeah, angel.â
One hand cups his chin, holding it between your thumb and fingers. The other hand drifts up in the familiar sort of salute you use when you heal him, fingers brushing Samâs hairline, tracing the creases on his forehead as he watches you. A soft press of weight, a faint pulse of blue, and a sharp inhale from Sam, and you know itâs worked. His eyes flutter open, half-lidded and soft as you drop your fingers away, grace fading out until itâs no brighter than the roomâs shadows. The lamplight fades out too, letting gentle darkness creep in to replace what was once a soft gold, Samâs pupils widening further as he adjusts to the darkness.
âTell me if itâs too much,â you murmur in his ear, lips brushing the shell of it.
âPromise,â he whispers back, shivering, goosebumps cropping up along his arms.
Slowly, you move in tandem. Sam crawls on his elbows back until his head hits the pillows, hair spreading around his head all tangled and knotted, like some kind of halo. Your palms, burning warm, trail up his forearms as you lay him back, hovering yourself over his body. Deft fingers pop the buttons on his shirtsleeves, Samâs huge hands helping undo the ones on his chest. You watch, fascinated, as his chest comes into view, bare under the shirt, skin pale from the lack of sunlight, hair dark like the hair on his head a faint brush trail over his pecs. He crunches as he removes the shirt properly, a hand pressed flat to the muscles of his abs feeling the way they ripple and contract through his movements, flattening out again when he lays back down with a sigh.
âOff?â he asks, his hands tugging at the hem of your shirt.
âNot yetâ you reply, delicately pushing his hands away.
âWant to feel you.â
âYou will.â
Sam almost pouts, something so sweet you nearly cave and let him remove your shirt, but you know his limits. With your grace flowing under his skin, electrifying every nerve until they all sing the same chorus, having your chest bare to him to roam his hands over would be too much for him right now when itâs so new. Heâd burn up, skin flushing red and angry, burning out until heâs a shell of himself. Youâre not here to hurt him, after all. Youâre just here to give him a good time, a first experience heâs never had before; itâs not every day Sam gets to mess around with an angel in his bed.
Drifting downward, your mouth returns to his as your hands palm downward, inching closer toward where heâs straining in his jeans. You go slow, giving him time to adjust to this new state of overwhelm, every nerve in his body no doubt firing a thousand times stronger than usual. You reach the happy trail that points down the slim v of his hips, sharp angled hipbones cutting into his skin and disappearing into the denim hem decorating his waist. The moment your fingers brush through the hair, Sam inhales sharp in a poorly concealed whine, back arching and hips jerking upward. You press down to keep him still, cautious with how much feeling you let himself get high on, keeping control over the situation, keeping control over Sam.
And he lets you. And he likes it.
He likes giving you control to do whatever you want with him. He likes letting himself feel everything a hundred times stronger than usual; every valley of your fingerprints, every particle of your breath on his cheek. Everything else he canât wait to feel waiting for him under your clothes.
The button to his jeans pops open, zipper pulled down slow, the sound of the metal parts unlinking impossibly loud in the space. Rustling denim fills the room, the soft press of your palms on his skin as you drag his jeans down past your legs, lifting your hips to give him enough motion to kick them off, still drunk on the taste of his mint chapstick. Settling into place again, your kisses trail blazing hot down the skin of his neck, his head tipped back to give you access to the striking ropes of muscle on the sides. Cautiously, you nip at one of them, your teeth driving a full-bodied moan from Samâs chest.
The tent in Samâs boxers presses insistently against your inner thigh, warm and full. Slow, painfully slow, you grip the waistband and work them down his legs, fingernails trailing along his skin and leaving faint white lines in their wake, the skin around turning gentle pink like rose petals. Once the fabric is clear of his feet, you make your way back up, equally slow, relishing every sound you can pull from Sam. Holding his legs down while you press a soft kiss to the inside of his knee makes his back arch lightly and makes him breathless, but leaving messy kisses along his thighs makes him squirm a little, almost whimpering with the anticipation. Taking advantage of it, you suck two careful marks on his thighs just near his hipbones, blooming dark pink that will surely fade into reddish purple by the time youâre done.
His dick is resting hard on his lower stomach, coarse hair curling at his base that you run your hand through, teasing. Letting him feel how your fingers catch on every hair, skin goosebumped and hot to the touch. He shivers when your hand ghosts over his length, swollen and pink at the tip, waiting patiently for you to do something. When your hands move back down his thighs instead, trailing along the insides so close to where he needs you yet refusing to touch him there, he exhales shakily, moving on your behalf.
Eyes screwed shut, Sam drifts a cautious hand towards his dick, trembling a little as he goes. You watch, confused, thinking heâs reaching for you. A low noise comes from his throat when his fingers wrap around himself, attempting desperately to alleviate some of the pressure thatâs built up in his abdomen while you were busy. You watch him stroke himself, tracking the way his fingers move over himself, likely something heâs done a hundred times before in cheap motels with too much energy and nowhere to put it. For a brief selfish moment, you wonder how many of those times have been to the thought of you; how many motel showers have heard your name, how many magazines heâs read and replaced the models with you in his head. The number likely isnât zero, and that makes you painfully hot and bothered about it.
A half-satisfied sigh spills from Samâs lips, thumb smoothing over his tip and coating himself in his arousal. Itâs pretty to you in a strange way, the same kind of iridescence as a pearl. If you look close enough, you swear you can see a faint rainbow sheen to it. Sam seems wildly unaware of the natural beauty of it, and you suspect he just canât see the same colours you can, canât see the same prettiness to whatâs not meant to be pretty.
âYou gonna do something?â Sam asks, wrecked. âOr just stare?â
Sliding your own pants off, you climb back up his body. Sitting yourself on his stomach, youâre just high enough that he canât grind against you.
âAsk nicely,â you comment, frowning a little.
To you, thereâs nothing strange about that comment. Itâs something you say several times a day, usually directed at his brother who seems to have no concept of manners or the word âpleaseâ. To you, this is just an everyday comment that means nothing more than what it asks for; respect.
To Sam, it means that and everything more. To Sam, itâs a command, a request he simply canât ignore. He turns his eyes on you, filled with something lustful and gorgeous, the kind of sin that draws you in because you know it canât hurt you. His lips form an âoâ shape, but no words come out; not until he clears his throat, the sound cracking in the space.
âPlease, angel. Do something. I canât-. I need-. Please.â
When his voice sounds that airy and high, that close to drifting out of his body and up somewhere far away, you have no choice but to listen to him. You seal his lips in a searing kiss, swiping your tongue along the bottom one, lapping up his taste. His hands come up to hold you, lacing together at the back as he holds your head in them, thumbs near your eyebrows. He kisses you back like youâre oxygen, hands feeling like they completely cover the sides of your head, grabbing at you and holding you close because he needs you there, your skin scraping along his beard and tickling deliciously.
You work your hips backward, shimmying them along his torso and dragging your heat over his stomach, down his happy trail until you reach his dick. Itâs hot and heavy against your ass, still slick from his earlier ministrations in what you now realize were meant to be preparation. Samâs working at the foil on a condom when you look back up, ripping it open with his teeth when his hands shake too much to be useful.
âDonât need it,â you say, knocking it from his hands.
âI-.â
âI am an angel, Sam.â
âEver heard of a Nephilim?â
You laugh, melodic. âIt canât happen.â
âYouâre sure?â
You stare. âI would not be saying this if I wasnât.â
Sam looks like heâs about to protest again, and thereâs only so much convincing you can do with words before Sam starts getting frustrated. Instead, you move the rest of the way back, grabbing Samâs dick and stroking him softly while you align yourself with him. The moment your fingers close around him, he whimpers high in his throat, stomach muscles jumping in time with your movements. It only takes a few seconds, but to Sam, it feels like it takes an hour; an hour of just feeling the heat of your palm on his sensitive heat, moving too slow and too fast. It takes all he has to keep it together. You hear him make a mental reminder to do this again.
âOf course we can,â you reply aloud.
âWhat?â
You nod toward him. âI heard you.â
Sam blushes furiously red. âSorry.â
âSam. I told you that you would like this. Stop feeling ashamed for it.â
Putting an end to the debate, you sink down on his length, slapping a hand over his mouth when he moans loud enough you worry Dean will hear from behind the closed door. Sam whines when he finally bottoms out, hands flying to your waist in an attempt to keep you still and make you move; he canât decide which would feel better at this point. To fit him fully, you rock your hips slightly back and forth, his tip notching on your walls as he fits where he always has, buried completely inside you. He gives another moan when you settle still again, the sound devolving into a muffled groan when you tighten your hand on his mouth. You can hear Deanâs footsteps outside getting closer, praying that heâll walk past without commenting on anything.
âSammy?â Dean yells. âYou in there?â
You and Sam both sigh in defeat. Sam goes to lift you off of him, but you stop his hands where they are. His head tips to the side, the confused puppy look heâs trademarked in your brain, and all you do is kiss him deep in reply.
âWhatâre you doing?â he whispers low.
âYou said something can hurt and feel good at the same time,â you whisper back. âIâm testing that theory.â
Samâs eyes widen in understanding, a soft grin slowly curling across his bearded face. He pecks your cheek before getting interrupted again by Deanâs banging on the doorframe.
âI got questions for you, Sammy,â he yells.
âDude, go read a book or something,â Sam shouts back.
You still your minute rocking. Sam looks, confused. You shrug, grinning.
âI did. I still got questions. Help a guy out, wouldâya?â
Sam groans, this time from his brotherâs sheer audacity instead of your heated touch.
âMake it quick.â
âDo I get to come in or am I stuck yellinâ at this door?â
âDonât come in!â you and Sam both yell at the same time.
Dean mutters something Sam canât hear but your ears pick up, something nasty that makes you chuckle and would make Sam slap his brother across the face if he heard it.
âWhatâs the question?â Sam asks.
âGot this case here, says itâs in, uh, Milwaukee.â
âUh huh.â
âAnd itâs talkinâ âbout some drowninâs.â
âWisconsinâs covered in lakes, Dean.â
âWell yeah. But this oneâs weird.â
You start moving again, gentle circles that make Sam muffle the breath he sucks in.
âWhyâs that?â Sam replies, voice careful and steady.
ââCause the guy drowned on land.â
Sam makes the kind of scrunched-up face he makes when something is definitely supernatural, but still impressive enough for him to be surprised about it.
âOh..kay. Weird.â
âYeah. And thereâs this symbol they found on his wrist that I wanted tâshow you. âCause I canât find it.â
âWhy would I know?â
âEh, thought your angel pal could help us out.â
Sam rolls his eyes right at the time you grind down harsh on him, his eyes stopping their motion to flutter closed as his head jerks back into the soft down of the pillows.
âWhatâs it look like?â Sam asks.
Dean describes the shape as best he can, but you and Sam both know heâs taking several creative liberties in an attempt to draw Sam out of his room and shoulder the work for him. You keep a mental image of what Dean draws, the picture so sharp and clear youâre surprised Sam canât see it floating between your chests. Thereâs a few vertical lines and a couple diagonal ones, something that looks like a spiral and is probably mean to be a triangle. Itâs surrounded by a circle, and Dean says it looks like a brand, flaying the skin around it the same shade of pink as Samâs sweat-flushed cheeks.
Each shape Dean describes currently earns Sam another roll of your hips, grinding yourself down on his length as best you can. Occasionally, he hits a spot that makes your toes curl against his legs and forces you to brace a palm on the middle of his ribcage, using his sternum to keep you upright. Samâs doing a decent job of keeping quiet, his sounds mostly reduced to quiet, shaky exhales of breath, but when he canât, your palm is quick enough to keep his moans quiet so that Dean doesnât hear.
âCould be a binding sigil,â Sam answers.
You still abruptly, thighs falling open and movements reduced to nothing so quickly Sam almost tears up at the loss of friction.
âNot right?â Sam whispers to you.
âNo. The spiral should be a triangle.â
Sam redraws his mental image. âDean?â
âWhat?â
âIs it Celtic?â
Dean shuffles some pages around. You still donât move.
âNo,â you and Dean both say.
Sam groans, frustrated. âOkay. Itâs either Enochian or some bastardization of it.â
That grants Sam another thrust of your hips downward, drawing up a whine.
âGood,â you whisper against the shell of his ear, kissing his pulse point.
âGreat. Whatâs it do?â Dean asks.
Sam shifts the both of you, tangling his fingers in your hair and burying his face into your shoulder to suppress the resulting groan.
âPr- probably binds- ah.â
You stop.
âNo, sorry. Not binding.â
You can see the gears turning in Samâs brain.
âWait, Dean. Do the diagonals start at the left or right?â
âUhâŠleft.â
A small movement from you, a reward for asking the right question. Deanâs silence continues, so you continue too, waiting them both out for whoever makes a mistake first. Samâs fingers squeeze the plush of your waist, nails leaving tiny half-moons that youâre notice later and wear because they came from Samâs hands. You keep kissing him, swallowing his moans as you build him up higher, working him until youâre certain that whatever pressure heâs feeling now is worse than heâs ever had. His face is screwed up, his mouth mumbling incoherent sounds into yours, nose scrunching. You can tell heâs close, heat burning sharp between you.
âHurts,â he whines.
Just as Samâs about to tip over the edge, you stop. You donât give him the pleasure of slowing down; just a full stop, thighs loosening and heels removed from his legs, palms off his chest and mouth away from his. Your palm blocks his desperate whine from reaching Deanâs ears, Samâs eyes peering at you bloodshot and frustrated.
âThe hell?â he whispers, throat wrecked.
âYou havenât figured it out yet,â is your answer.
âDean?â Sam asks, weak. âYou there?â
âYeah, yeah. Just readinâ somethinâ. Says the lines start from the bottom left, not the top left.â
âItâs a sigil for a plague,â he comments.
âGood,â you whisper, starting a slow roll.
âOh great. Which one?â Dean asks, exasperated.
âSeven, I think.â
You stop. Sam whines.
âNot seven, not seven,â he says, punched out and breathy. ââS not seven.â
âWell, thatâs great. Yâonly got, what, nine more to go through?â
âShut up.â
You lean down to Samâs ear, lacing your fingers through his hand and bringing it up to rest beside his head.
âSeven was hail, Sam.â
âI know.â
âAsk him what the man drowned in.â
Sam clears his throat, taking a shaky breath in.
âDean?â
âYeah.â
âWhatâd he drown in? Water?â
You can hear Dean shake his head, then remember Sam canât see it.
âNo, uhâŠdrowned in his own blood. Saw trap style.â
Your hand brushes sweaty hair back from Samâs forehead.
âItâs one. Dean, itâs the first plague. The whole turning water into blood situation.â
Your grip tightens on Samâs hair, pulling until you draw a whimper from his throat. Again, you start slow circles, mouthing at his pulse point, your hand still locked in his. Again, you build him all the way up until heâs just about to let himself go. Again, you stop abruptly, this time drawing gentle tears from the corner of Samâs eye.
âWhat now?â he murmurs to you.
âYou havenât told him how to remove it.â
âI donât know how to remove it.â
âYes, you do, Sam.â
Dean shuffles. âHow am I supposed to get it off these people?â
âFire?â
You move, cautious, slow. A half answer, but not complete.
âHellfire, maybe?â Sam adds.
You stop.
âWhat other fire is there?â Sam murmurs to himself. âNot hellfireâŠnot fireâŠfâŠitâsâŠholyâŠholy fire. Dean! Dean, itâs holy fire.â
âGood boy,â you coo, nipping at the dip between Samâs collarbones and moving again.
âAnything else?â Sam asks his brother.
âNah. Just needed that geek brain oâyours.â
Deanâs footsteps thud heavily off to the library, your ears picking up the sounds of him rummaging for whiskey in the room before dropping heavily into a chair and commenting something about how late it is. Once youâre certain heâs not coming back, you let yourself move again, thumbing along the hem of your shirt that you stole from Samâs closet. Some worn t-shirt thatâs seen several years of motel rooms and duffel bag bottoms, travelling with him everywhere he goes. It smells like him too, something soft like pavement after rain and cedar wood burning. Sam helps you slide it over your head and drop it to the floor, hands eagerly resting on your ribs again, this time bare.
Your movements turn from circles to proper thrusts forward, your stomach brushing his at some moments, his arms anchoring you against him. Your hand is still holding his near his head, his knuckles white from how heâs squeezing your hand. Heâs panting now, full-bodied pants every time you break the kiss, the bundle of arousal in his stomach gripping him tighter and tighter the longer it builds for, radiating to his spine and arching his back off the mattress. You clench around him, earning yourself a heavy moan that echoes in your ears, building the both of you higher and higher. Samâs hard to the point of pain, aching with every rock of your hips, desperately pleading for you to let him come.
You slow, almost stopping but not quite. Tears fills Samâs eyes, and you realize, after a quick delve into his soul, it really does hurt.
âPleasepleaseplease,â he begs, breathless.
You grind down harsh, a cracked whine breaking the air from Samâs lips. The bubble bursts in Samâs core, and then heâs coming hot and heavy into you, moaning an incomprehensible version of your name into the roomâs night air. Tears slip sideways into his hairline as he lets go, the consequences of reaching the height of pleasured pain. His hips shove up into you, pushing himself impossibly deeper as he finally empties himself, the pressure abating slow and steady with each bit. Somewhere along the way you come too, but youâre too focused on Sam and Samâs too focused on his own orgasm to notice. You slow, a gentle wind-down unlike earlier, only fully stopping when Sam whimpers something about being sensitive, tingles arching up your back when you tip onto him.
Heâs panting heavily now, lying spread-eagled on the bed with one arm hanging half off. His chest rises and falls dramatically, your lips kissing up and down it as you wait patiently for him to come down enough that you can slip away for a cloth. Your first attempt at moving doesnât go far, Sam mumbling for a few more minutes despite your insistence that he gets up soon. Eventually, his breathing slows into something normal, heart calming down until itâs back to thudding its regular steady rhythm in his chest. You brush his hair back again, this time ensuring you donât pull at the knots youâve created by fisting your hands through it; just getting the sweat-sticky strands off his forehead so you can lay a soft kiss to it.
Finally, slowly, when heâs soft enough youâre both sure you can move, you lift yourself off of Sam. He sucks in a breath at the cold of the room reaching his skin that was previously covered by you, adjusting to the room temperature while you search for sleep clothes. He has a hand thrown over his eyes when you come back to bed with fresh clothes, and you peel it back gently to watch him. Your fingers return to his forehead, retracting the grace youâd given him, your eyes watching how he sinks deeper into the mattress again now that heâs fully human once more.
âI will clean up here,â you murmur, kissing him softly. âGet yourself sorted out.â
âDo I have to?â he murmurs back.
You smile gently. âYes, love. You do. It wonât take very long.â
Sam hauls himself upright with a grunt, sitting on the edge of the bed and stretching his long arms over his head, twisting his back to get out the tension from earlier. His hip cracks loud when he stands, and something twists in your heart when you catch the silvers in his hair and beard glint in the grey nighttime light. Heâs getting older, you know this. Heâs older than he was when you met, and something about that makes you feel overjoyed but also a little sad. Heâs getting to an age he never assumed heâd reach, surviving everything that brought him to this point. But that also means heâs running out of time on earth, something youâre distraught at. For someone like him who loves earth so much, it seems cruel to take it away from him.
Turning your thoughts away from his mortality, you straighten out the bedsheets, a snap of your fingers cleaning and drying them, a second snap making them carry the same warmth that they would if theyâd just been removed from the dryer or just brought inside from the sunlight. Your hands fluff the pillows into something that isnât dented by Samâs head, straightening the pillowcases again. Your ears pick up the sounds of Sam in the bathroom, your brain filtering out the sound of him peeing and focusing instead on his soft humming as he washes his hands.
When he shuffles back into the room, youâre in the process of putting on your sleep clothes; an old thin shirt of his that you only wear because anything warmer makes you feel like youâre burning from the inside out and pants made out of some kind of athletic material you hate but keep wearing. Sam struggles into a clean pair of boxers, nearly falling over when his heel gets stuck in the leg. You pull the sheets back so Sam can climb in, throwing them over him as he snuggles into your side, one impossibly heavy arm thrown over your waist. Boneless, without putting in any effort to keep himself light for you, he has the weight of tons of rocks; it never hurts, just a comforting heaviness that proves heâs not going anywhere anytime soon.
âSo?â you murmur, turning to face him.
âSo,â he replies, soft and tired eyes watching you fondly.
âWas it too much?â
Sam shakes his head, shaking strands of hair into his eyes in the process.
âNo. âS perfect. Thank you.â
âWould- would you do it again?â
Sam pushes into the pillows groaning a soft comment about angel stamina. âNot now.â
You laugh light and airy. âI didnât mean now, love.â
âOh. He hauls himself up on one elbow, blinking slow. âYeah. Yeah, I really would.â
You reach for him, dragging him to you. The perk of your angel strength means Sam can go completely boneless in your hold, putting in no effort whatsoever, and you can still drag him around like he weighs nothing. Heâs barely in control of his muscles right now, but he still slings his arms around you when you pull him to your chest, one hand disappearing under your pillow and the other resting somewhere on your shoulder blade. His hand wonât go numb; you wonât let it. Instead, he melts himself completely over you, burying his face into your shoulder and humming as he gets comfortable.
âOkay?â you ask when he stills.
âOkay,â he murmurs, barely a word rather than just a sound.
You kiss the top of his head. âRest well, Sam.â
âYou know I will.â
You smile into his hair. âI know.â
He presses a lazy ghost of a kiss to the side of your neck. âI love you, angel.â
âYou know I love you too.â
âI know.â
Itâs the last conscious thing he says before the sleep crawling up his spine claims him, surrounding him in a warm blanket as he drifts off in your arms. You donât sleep, Sam knows you donât, but for his sake you slow your breathing and heart rate until it matches his; beat for beat, breath for breath. Your eyes drift shut, brain alert and awake but eyes sleeping with the rest of the room. You notice the moment his exhales change from through his nose to through his mouth, then shift into soft snores that get gradually louder as the night progresses. Itâs never annoying, and youâve told him this, but he still tries his best to keep it to a minimum with you. He doesnât shift at all during the night, sleeping as heavy and deep as a fallen log. And if he drools a little on your shirt in his deep sleep? Well, nobody but you will know.
varsity soccer spider bites drummer frat president red solo cups pot brownies extrovert has a full roster campus tutor golden retriever parties wealthy family
ïč đ» ïčâ fratboy!sam who is attending stanford on a full-ride for his soccer career, but heâs also studying to become a future lawyer. his dad always told him to aim higher, and to use more than his athleticism to get by. but he was the favorite, the youngest. he knew heâd have borderline millions to fall back on if his dreams didnât work out.
ïč đ» ïčâ fratboy!sam works at an autobody shop owned by one of the frat guysâ uncles. even though he comes from wealth, he still insists on working for his extra pocket money. plus it roots him back to that small-town-boy edge he had growing up. and girls like seeing him all sweaty and covered in grease from working on car parts they know absolutely nothing about.
ïč đ» ïčâ fratboy!sam loves going to his familyâs beach house every weekend, heâs constantly throwing parties and inviting nearly half the campus every chance he can. him and some of his frat brothers have gone viral multiple times for jumping off of roofs and doing other idiotic things while drunk, which has earned them a lot of sit-downs about their actions and how they should âbehave correctlyâ because theyâre ârole modelsâ to the underclassmen. they never listen.
ïč đ» ïčâ fratboy!sam who brings one of his childhood dogsâa golden retriever named bonesâeverywhere he goes. he snuck him onto campus one day, and nearly got expelled for it before his parents swooped in and âdonatedâ a large fee to the board, resulting in bones now living in the frat house as a permanent resident. many students have placed bets on sam walking across the stage with his dog trotting not far behind him. and honestly, the odds are looking to be in their favor.
Thinking about edging Sam after a bad hunt as your way to punish him for a stupid call he made ( 18+ )
The motel room door clicked shut behind themâher hand steady on the lock, her breath even. Sam dropped the knife into the sink with a clatter and braced his palms against the counter, head hanging between his shoulders. Every muscle burned. Every nerve was frayed raw.
The hunt hadnât turned out like it should have. He tried so hard, and still failed.
She didnât say a word. Just stepped close behind him, pressing a soft kiss between his shoulder blades before stripping his blood-stained flannel away from his body, followed by his dark undershirt. But she didnât stop there.Â
Her fingers hooking into the waistband of Samâs jeans, tugging until the button popped free. The zipper hissed down, slow and deliberate. His breath hitched, but he didnât move, didnât protest. Her hands were warm against his hips, pushing denim and cotton down his thighs until they pooled at his ankles. He hadnât realised heâd moved to help her slide the fabric off of his feet until they were gone.
Leaving him naked as she turned him around to face her.
Then her palms flattened against his chest, guiding him backwards until his knees hit the mattress.Â
He sank onto the bed, legs spread, heart hammering. She climbed onto the bed and manoeuvred behind him. Her denim-clad legs spread, allowing ample room for his body to settle between them, as she guided Sam back so that his back was pressed against her chest.
Her careful fingers traced the line of his cock, already half-hard from adrenaline and exhaustion, and the sheer relief of her touch.
Sam exhaled sharply through his nose as her fingers curled around him, her grip firm but unhurried. The first stroke dragged a groan from his throat, his hips twitching forward instinctivelyâonly for her free hand to clamp down on his thigh. "No," she murmured, lips brushing the shell of his ear, placing a kiss there. "You donât get to move." Her thumb swiped over the head of his cock, smearing precum in slow, deliberate circles, and Sam shuddered, his fingers digging into the mattress.
She worked him with a rhythm that was maddeningly inconsistentâlong, languid pulls followed by abrupt pauses where her hand went still, her breath warm against his shoulder. Every time his breathing hitched, every time his muscles tensed in anticipation, sheâd ease off, leaving him gasping. "Baby, please," he managed, the word cracking halfway through. She hummed, amused, and tightened her grip just enough to make him suck in a breath. "Please, what?" Her voice was honey-sweet, taunting, quiet.Â
Samâs head dropped back against her shoulder, his pulse rabbiting under his skin. "Fuckâjust let meâ"
"Let you what?" she interrupted, her fingers slowing to a torturous crawl. "Come? You think youâve earned that?" Her other hand reached around his body, sliding up his chest, fingertips brushing the hollow of his throat. "After the shit you pulled tonight? Charging in like some fucking martyr? When I told you weâd find a better way?" Sam swallowed hard, his cock throbbing in her grasp. "I had to," he gritted out. She laughed, low and dark, and twisted her wrist on the next stroke, her nails grazing the sensitive underside. "I donât want to hear that bullshit."
The denial was methodical. Every time he edged too close, her grip vanished entirely, leaving him bucking into empty air, his body coiled tight as a spring. Sweat beaded along his spine, his thighs trembling.
By the fifth time heâd been refused the ability to spill over the edge, his voice had dissolved into ragged, broken sounds he wasnât aware he was capable of makingâwhimpers, half-formed pleas, his head lolling from side to side. "God, pleaseâ" His hips jerked, desperate, but she cracked her open palm against his thigh so sharp the noise of it echoed throughout the entire room.
"Look at you," she mused, mouth pressed to his ear. "Big, bad Sam Winchester. Reduced to a pathetic mess."
Just the way the words left her mouth told Sam that five denied orgasms was nothing. She showed no sign of letting up anytime soon, unfortunate for him.
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a/n: i have no idea what this is. the idea came into my head and i wrote it in about ten minutes. i could develop it into a full fic but i don't have the effort to bother, so enjoy whatever this is. Debating starting a taglist but alas i don't think i write enough to justify one.
summary ËËđąÖŽà»ÖŽ after too many shots celebrating samâs perfect gpa, the words youâve been holding back finally spill while youâre dancing in his arms, and sam canât wait to hear them again somewhere more private.
pairing ËËđąÖŽà»ÖŽ stanford!sam winchester x reader ( f )
wordcount ËËđąÖŽà»ÖŽ 1130 genre ËËđąÖŽà»ÖŽ smut !!
warnings ËËđąÖŽà»ÖŽ explicit sexual content, drunk consensual sex, semi-public bathroom sex, p in v, use of condom, alcohol consumption, mild language
notes ËËđąÖŽà» ÖŽâà» consider supporting my work .á
youâre pressed tight against samâs chest, the bass from the bar speakers vibrating through both of you hard enough you feel it in your bones. the room spins in the best way, warm lights blurring at the edges, laughter and clinking glasses fading into background noise.
samâs hands are steady on your waist, holding you up because your knees decided to quit somewhere around the fourth shot. or was it the fifth? you lost count after the bartender started cheering for samâs ridiculous 174 lsat.
heâs the greatest boyfriend. tall, smart, kind in that quiet way that makes your chest ache. youâve been sharing that tiny off-campus apartment for months now, tangled sheets and late-night study sessions turning into something deeper every single day, but the big words have never quite made it past your lips.
tonight, they do.
your arms loop around his neck, face buried in the warm skin just below his ear. the smell of himâsoap and a hint of beer and that faint library-book scent he always carriesâmakes everything feel safe even while the world tilts.
âiâm so damn in love with you, sam,â you mumble, lips brushing his earlobe. the words tumble out sloppy and honest, soaked in tequila.
sam stills for half a second, his grip tightening. then a slow grin spreads across his face, surprised and so damn bright it cuts through the haze in your head. he pulls back just enough to look at you, hazel eyes warm and a little wide.
âsay that again,â he says, voice low, right against your mouth.
your knees buckle a little more. you smile, drunk and dizzy and stupidly happy. âi said iâm stupidly in love with you, sammy.â
the grin turns into something hungrier. he doesnât answer with words. instead he catches your hand, laces your fingers together, and starts weaving through the crowd toward the back hallway. you stumble after him, giggling, the music still thumping in your chest.
he pushes open the bathroom doorâa single stallâlocks it behind you with a quick click, and the noise of the bar dulls to a muffled pulse.
before you can say anything he lifts you, big hands under your thighs, and sits you on the edge of the counter, your ass half in the sink, the porcelain is cool through your skirt. sam steps between your legs, tall frame crowding you, and you feel how hard he already is, pressed right against your core through his jeans.
âfuck, baby,â he breathes, forehead resting against yours. his voice is rough, breath warm with alcohol and want brushing your cheek. âyou canât just say shit like that when iâm trying to be responsible.â
you laugh softly, hands sliding under his shirt to feel the warm skin of his back. âbut i mean it. been meaning it for months. just⊠scared, i guess. now iâm drunk and brave.â
sam kisses you then, deep and messy, tongues sliding together while his hands push your skirt higher up your thighs. you moan into his mouth, needy, hips rocking forward to chase the friction.
heâs so hard it makes your stomach flutter.
responsible sam, always the careful one, still pulls a condom from his wallet without breaking the kiss. you hear the foil tear and it sends a fresh wave of heat through you.
âneed you,â you whisper against his lips, fingers fumbling with his belt. âright now, sam. please.â
âiâve got you.â his voice cracks a little, too much feeling packed into three words.
he shoves his jeans and boxers down just enough, rolls the condom on with steady hands even though his breath is coming fast. then heâs pushing your panties aside, fingers sliding through your slick folds once, twice, checking youâre ready.
âjesus christ, baby,â he hisses.
you are. embarrassingly so. the alcohol and the confession and the way heâs looking at you like you hung the moon have you dripping.
he lines up and sinks in slow, one long push that stretches you open and steals the air from your lungs. you gasp, head falling back against the mirror, and sam groans low in his throat, hips stuttering once before he catches himself.
âgod, you feel so good,â he murmurs, forehead pressed to yours again. he starts moving, deep and steady, the angle perfect because of how high the counter is.
every thrust drags against that spot inside you that makes sparks shoot up your spine.
âbeen wanting to hear you say it. i love you too, baby. so fucking much. didnât know how to say it either.â
your hands clutch at his shoulders, nails digging in through his shirt. the confession feels raw, perfect, the words tumbling out between moans and the wet sound of skin meeting skin.
âlove you,â you pant, legs wrapping tighter around his waist. âlove your stupid giant brain and how you make me coffee exactly right and how you look at me like iâm the only person in the room even when weâre in a crowd.â
samâs rhythm falters for a second, then picks up, harder, deeper, like your words are fuel. the counter creaks under you. his hand slips between your bodies, thumb finding your clit and rubbing tight circles that make your vision spark white at the edges.
âsay it again,â he demands softly, voice strained. âplease.â
âiâm in love with you, sam winchester.â the words come out breathy, broken by a moan when he hits that perfect angle again. âso in love it scares me sometimes.â
he kisses you hard, swallowing the sound, hips snapping forward. the tension coils tight and fast, alcohol making everything feel brighter, more intense. you come first, clenching around him with a cry that he muffles against your neck, body shaking through the waves.
sam follows right after, burying himself deep and groaning your name, hips jerking through the aftershocks. for a long moment you just cling to each other, breathing hard, hearts hammering in sync.
he stays inside you while you both come down, pressing soft kisses to your temple, your cheek, the corner of your mouth. âweâre doing this right,â he whispers, still a little breathless. âthe apartment, the future, all of it. iâm not letting you go.â
you smile against his skin, drunk and sated and so full of love it hurts in the best way. your fingers thread through his hair, holding him close while the muffled music from the bar pulses on.
the bathroom light is too bright and the counter is uncomfortable and tomorrow youâll probably have a killer hangover, but right now none of that matters. sam is warm and solid and yours, and the words you finally said are still hanging in the air between you like a promise neither of you plan to break.
ê. all works ; writing guidelines ; writing schedule.
Birthday!Sam Winchester x Fem!Reader đ Explicit sexual content, NSFW, 18+ only, rough sex, light bondage/restraint, praise kink, size kink, overstimulation, dom/sub dynamics, penetrative sex, oral sex (male receiving), dirty talk, possessive behavior, multiple orgasms, I'm writing this instead of therapy
You've been planning this for weeks.
Sam's birthday always gets overshadowed by hunts, by world-ending apocalypses, by Dean's need to make everything about pie. But not this year. This year, you're making damn sure Sam Winchester feels WORSHIPPED.
His room in the bunker is transformedâsoft amber candlelight flickering across the walls, casting everything in warm shadows. You've dimmed the usual harsh lighting, and the air smells faintly of sandalwood and something darker, headier. You're wearing the silk robe you bought specifically for thisâdeep green, short enough to make your intentions crystal clear, clinging to every curve.
Your heart is POUNDING as you hear his footsteps in the hallway. He's been out on a supply run with Dean, completely unsuspecting, and you texted him twenty minutes ago: Come to your room. Now.
The door opens.
Sam stops dead in the doorway, his eyes going wide as he takes in the sceneâthe candles, the lighting, and then YOU, leaning against his desk in that barely-there robe with a smile that promises everything. His duffel bag hits the floor with a thud.
"Happy birthday, Sam," you purr, and the way his pupils dilate is IMMEDIATE.
"Whatâ" His voice comes out rough, his eyes dragging over your body like he's trying to memorize every inch. "What is this?"
"Your present." You push off the desk and walk toward him slowly, deliberately, watching his throat work as he swallows hard. "I figured you deserved to feel appreciated for once. Worshipped, even."
His hands flex at his sides like he's physically restraining himself from reaching for you. "You didn't have toâ"
"I wanted to." You're close enough now to press your palm against his chest, feeling his heart hammering beneath the flannel. "Let me take care of you tonight, Sam. Let me make you feel good."
The sound he makes is somewhere between a groan and your name, and then his massive hands are cupping your face, tilting your head back so he can kiss you DESPERATELY. It's all heat and need, his tongue sliding against yours as he walks you backward until your legs hit the bed.
"You're incredible," he breathes against your mouth, his hands sliding down to grip your waist. "So fucking beautifulâ"
"Sit." You push gently at his chest, and he obeys immediately, sinking onto the edge of the bed with his eyes locked on you. The size difference is even more pronounced like thisâSam is HUGE, all long limbs and broad shoulders, and you standing between his spread thighs makes you feel deliciously small.
You reach for the silk ties you'd laid out earlierâdeep burgundy, soft and strong. His eyes track the movement, darkening with understanding.
"You trust me?" you ask softly.
"Always." No hesitation.
You guide his wrists together, wrapping the silk around them with careful loopsânot tight enough to hurt, but enough to restrain. Enough to make him FEEL it. You secure the ties to the headboard, and Sam tests them experimentally, his biceps flexing as he pulls slightly.
"Fuck," he mutters, his voice already wrecked. "You're reallyâ"
"I'm really." You straddle his thigh, letting him feel how wet you already are through the thin silk. "Tonight is about YOU, Sam Winchester. About making you feel as amazing as you are."
You kiss him again, slower this time, savoring the way he strains against the restraints like he's desperate to touch you. Your hands map the planes of his chest as you work his flannel open, button by button, revealing golden skin and muscle.
"God, look at you," you murmur, pressing kisses along his collarbone. "So strong. So beautiful. Do you have any idea what you do to me?"
He groans, his head falling back as you work your way down his chest, your tongue tracing the lines of his abs. "Pleaseâ"
"Please what, birthday boy?" You're working his belt open now, the clink of metal loud in the quiet room.
"Touch me. Your mouthâfuck, I needâ"
You free his cock and it's THICK and hard and already leaking, and the sight makes your mouth water. "Need this?" You wrap your hand around him, barely able to close your fingers around his girth, and he BUCKS into your grip with a strangled sound.
"Yesâgod, yesâ"
You take him into your mouth slowly, savoring the weight of him on your tongue, the way his whole body goes taut as you hollow your cheeks and SUCK. The sounds he makes are absolutely OBSCENEâbroken groans and curses and your name like a prayer.
"So good," he's gasping, his hips jerking despite his obvious attempts at control. "Your mouth feels so fucking goodâ"
You work him deeper, relaxing your throat, using your hand on what you can't take, and his thighs are TREMBLING beneath your free hand. The silk restraints creak as he pulls against them, desperate to touch you, to grip your hair, to take control.
"I'm gonnaâfuck, I'm closeâ" His voice breaks on a moan and you pull off with an obscene pop, grinning up at him.
"Not yet. It's your birthday. You're getting EVERYTHING tonight."
You strip off the robe, letting it pool at your feet, and Sam's eyes go MOLTEN as he takes in your naked body. "Jesus Christ," he breathes. "You're perfect. So fucking perfect."
You climb onto the bed, straddling his hips, and reach up to untie his wrists. The moment he's free, his hands are ON youâgripping your waist, your hips, sliding up to cup your breasts as he sits up to capture your mouth in a bruising kiss.
"My turn," he growls against your lips, and suddenly you're on your back with Sam looming over you, all that height and muscle and POWER focused entirely on you. "You wanted to worship me? Now I'm gonna worship YOU."
His mouth is EVERYWHEREâyour neck, your breasts, sucking marks into your skin as his huge hands spread your thighs wide. When his tongue finally drags through your folds, you nearly scream, your back arching off the bed.
"Samâoh godâSAMâ"
He's RELENTLESS, his tongue circling your clit with devastating precision, two thick fingers sliding inside you and curling to hit that spot that makes you see stars. The size of his fingers alone is almost too much, stretching you, filling you, and when he adds a third you're SOBBING with pleasure.
"That's it," he murmurs against your skin, his voice pure gravel. "Let me hear you. Wanna hear every sound you make when I make you come."
You're already so close, pleasure coiling tight in your belly, and when he seals his lips around your clit and SUCKS while his fingers thrust deep, you SHATTER, coming so hard your vision whites out, your whole body convulsing as waves of pleasure crash over you.
He doesn't stop. He works you through it and PAST it, his tongue gentling but never leaving your clit, his fingers still moving inside you, and suddenly you're coming AGAIN, overstimulated and overwhelmed and absolutely wrecked.
"Samâtoo muchâI can'tâ"
"You can." He rises over you, his chin glistening with your arousal, his eyes dark with possession. "You're gonna give me one more, baby. Gonna come on my cock this time."
He lines himself up and pushes inside in one slow, devastating thrust, and the STRETCH is incredibleâhe's so big, so thick, filling you so completely you can barely breathe. Your hands scrabble at his shoulders, his back, trying to anchor yourself as he bottoms out with a groan that sounds like it's torn from his soul.
"Fuck, you feel amazing," he grits out, his forehead pressed to yours. "So tight. So perfect. Like you were made for me."
"Move," you gasp. "Please, Sam, I needâ"
He pulls almost all the way out and SLAMS back in, setting a brutal pace that has you crying out with every thrust. The bed frame creaks, the headboard hitting the wall, and you don't care who hears because Sam Winchester is fucking you like he's trying to imprint himself on your soul.
"Look at you," he's panting, one hand gripping your hip hard enough to bruise while the other slides between your bodies to circle your clit. "Taking my cock so well. So beautiful like this, falling apart for me. You're MINE, you hear me? Mine."
"Yours," you sob, your nails raking down his back. "All yours, Samâgod, you're so deepâso BIGâ"
The praise makes him GROWL, his hips snapping harder, faster, the angle shifting until he's hitting that perfect spot inside you with every thrust. You're babbling now, incoherent pleas and his name and broken sounds of pleasure, and you can feel another orgasm building, bigger than the others, threatening to consume you entirely.
"Come for me," Sam commands, his voice wrecked and desperate. "Wanna feel you come on my cock. Come for me, baby, NOWâ"
You EXPLODE, your whole body seizing as pleasure detonates through every nerve, and you're dimly aware of screaming his name as you clench around him rhythmically. Sam groans, his rhythm faltering, and then his hands are leaving your hip and clit to grip your waist TIGHT, pulling you impossibly closer as he buries his face in your neck, nuzzling against your skin.
"Perfect," he's gasping against your throat, his hips stuttering. "So perfectâlove you so muchâfuck, I'mâ"
He comes with a broken shout muffled against your neck, his whole body shuddering as he spills inside you, his grip on your waist never loosening, holding you like you're the only thing keeping him tethered to earth.
For a long moment, there's nothing but harsh breathing and racing hearts and the feeling of his weight pressing you into the mattress. Then Sam lifts his head, his eyes soft and wondering as he brushes your sweat-dampened hair back from your face.
"Best birthday ever," he murmurs, pressing a tender kiss to your lips.
You laugh breathlessly, your body still trembling with aftershocks. "Yeah?"
"Yeah." He carefully pulls out, making you both hiss at the sensitivity, and then he's gathering you against his chest, his huge hands gentle now as they stroke your back. "You're incredible. I love you."
"I love you too." You press a kiss over his heart, feeling it thunder beneath your lips. "Happy birthday, Sam."
He holds you close as the candles flicker around you, and for once, the world outside can wait. Tonight, Sam Winchester is exactly where he belongsâworshipped, loved, and completely yours.
summary: You're Sam's study partner, and you just broke up with your boyfriend
request: stanford sammy smut
warnings: smut, cursing, oral female receiving, kinda sub!sam, cum eating, one mention of drug use, premature ejaculation
wc: 4.5k
a/n: requests open!!! and happy birthday sammyyy// pt2?
Sam stands on the steps of the sorority house and waits for someone to open the door. A wave of disbelief hits him, and he gets that same weird sensation that heâs been having on and off for the last three years, like heâs living someone elseâs life. He wants it to be his life, so much so that he made it so, but even now, thereâs lingering dread that somehow, a life like this, a normal life, isnât his and never could be. That it's some kind of illusion dangling in front of him on a string, only to inevitably be ripped away when heâs not expecting it.Â
The front door whips open, and Samâs confronted with the overwhelming smell of floral perfume covering up the smell of pot. He really should be used to it by now with how long heâs been coming here recently, but he still has to put effort into controlling his expression.Â
âHey, Molly.â He says with a polite smile.Â
âOh, hi, Sam.â Molly says, stepping aside to let him in. âWasnât sure if weâd be seeing you this weekend afterâŠyâknow.âÂ
Sam follows her further into the house, one hand on the strap of his backpack as he gives a courteous nod and smile to the few sorority sisters on the couch, who are watching some reality show while painting their nails. Heâs only following Molly to be polite. By this point, he could find his way to your room with his eyes closed. And today, like most days, he has no idea what Molly is talking about.Â
âDid something happen?â He asks.Â
âYou didnât hear? Kyle broke up with her, like, on Monday.â Molly whispers the last part, as if gossip didnât move through this house like wildfire. âSheâs trying to act like sheâs okay. Wonât even, like, really tell any of us what happened. Sheâs been in her room since, like, Tuesday. Thatâs why Iâm so surprised she didnât cancel on you.âÂ
âMaybe she wanted a distraction.â Sam suggests.Â
âMaybe.â Molly agrees. âJust donât take it personally if she isnât really interested in studying.âÂ
Sam uses his ascent of the stairs to process what Mollyâd said about you. For as long as Sam had known you, youâd been dating this football player Kyle. Sam had met you his sophomore year during a night out with mutual friends. He was immediately attracted to you, and then the more he spoke to you, he realized you were down to earth, funny in a harmlessly sarcastic way, and probably one of the smartest people heâd ever met. Very quickly, his attraction snowballed into a full fledged crush. Until heâd been informed you had a boyfriend on the football team, and that no, you hadnât been flirting with him or returning his interest, you were genuinely like that with everyone, magnetic and engaged.Â
So Sam backed off. His day to day felt precarious as is, there was no point in pining after someone that was already spoken for. That would just be asking for trouble. Heâd only see you on outings with other friends, and then he would maintain a casual distance. If you saw him around campus, you were always friendly, giving him that dazzling smile and a wave, asking about his classes and anything else. If he was looking for a seat to knock out a few hours studying in the crowded library, youâd wave him over to your table. Heâd have to work twice as hard to concentrate, with you sitting across from him, but he never said no. Â
Heâd wondered at one point if you were being so nice to him because you sensed something was off about him. Maybe you felt bad for the kid that had no one show up on family day. Or maybe youâd heard heâd moved into his freshman dorm with two bags, nothing more, and now you felt sorry for him.Â
The more Sam knew you, the more it became clear to him that you werenât treating him any differently because he was different. That was just you. You actually cared what he had to say about his Law in the Age of Media and Technology course, and when you smiled at him from across a room, it was because you were actually happy to see him.Â
He began running into you more at the beginning of junior year, now that you both were taking a majority of pre-law courses that overlapped. He did his best to keep space between you without ever being rude, would selectively tune out of any conversation that even approached you and your boyfriend, and fully dedicated himself to his studies.Â
A few months ago, when LSAT prep started, a big group of pre-law students organized study sessions. Sam didnât have a lawyer in the family to coach him, so he figured studying with the others would be a good way to gain more insight into the test and the application processes as a whole. They started off in the library, with about twenty kids showing up. You were there, too. It only took a few sessions for it to become clear that whatever the intention of these sessions had originally been, there was no actual studying being accomplished.Â
Youâd approached Sam and suggested you both ditch the group and start studying on your own. Together. Powerless to say no to you, he agreed.Â
Which is why heâs knocking on your bedroom door again, just like he had the week before. Only this time, his mind is slowly mauling over the fact that you now donât have a boyfriend, which has his gut swooping. Immediately, he feels like an asshole for being pleased by the news, especially when you could be so upset. He wonders if heâll be able to tell youâve been crying, then wonders if he tried to touch you to comfort you, if you would let him.Â
âHey, Sam,â You open the door with a smile. âRight on time.âÂ
âHey, howâre you?â He asks casually, setting his stuff down at your desk, where he studies while you usually spread your stuff out on the bed. You close the door behind him.Â
âIf I have to read one more logical reasoning question about a politician lying, I might drop out.âÂ
Sam chuckles. âBut then you wouldnât have the crippling debt of law school to look forward to,âÂ
You give him a wry smile. âHow kind of you to remind me.âÂ
You donât seem upset, or like youâve been crying. Your room is neat the way it usually is, and it looks entirely the same to Sam, as he conducts a quick sweep of the area, with the exception of the pictures of your now ex-boyfriend missing from around the edges of your vanity mirror.Â
Youâre wearing a tight fitting, white Stanford shirt, that exposes a lot of the even tighter body underneath. You throw yourself back onto your bed, laying on your stomach, distracted by the open LSAT study guide and a bunch of scattered flashcards, and Sam has to clear his throat and force himself to look away.Â
Your phone starts ringing. âSorry about that,â You apologize before silencing it.Â
You both start by taking a series of practice questions. Even though heâs sitting at the desk with his back to you, youâre still distracting him. He canât stop thinking about what would be the most appropriate way to ask you about your breakup, then decides he shouldnât ask at all. Thereâs no point, anyway. He already knows and it doesnât change anything. Youâre justâŠtoo good for him. A beautiful girl, a sorority sister, kind, charismatic, and intelligent. Sam doesnât deserve you. He doesnât even come close. Just being at Stanford makes him feel like heâs already pushing his luck. Being with someone like you would be like asking for punishment.Â
But he canât help but wonder what would make someone dump you. Either you did something uncharacteristically despicable, and Samâs brain struggles to even villanize you to think through the possibilities, or Kyle is a fucking moron, which he thinks is entirely more likely.Â
âIâm done,â You startle him by saying after a half hour. You jump up onto the desk, so that your bare thighs are only inches away from his book, your feet swinging off the edge
Heâd been thinking too hard about you. Half of his questions remain unanswered.Â
âYou usually finish before me,â You frown as you notice.Â
âYeah, um, I just-â His cheeks feel hot as he returns your gaze.Â
Youâre looking down at him, and the breeze from the open window across the room rustles your hair gently. The soft gust momentarily smothers him in the smell of you- something warm and sweet, like vanilla. Evidently, the breeze chills you to the point that Sam could see the sharp peaks of your nipples through your T-shirt, if he wasnât so deadset on keeping his eyes on your face.Â
âSo either I became a faster test taker than the unbeatable Sam Winchester in less than a week, or somethingâs distracting you.â You muse, still observing him carefully. Itâs a little unnerving, how easy you can read him.Â
âWell, miracles do happen.âÂ
You purse your lips, amusement glittering in your eyes. âFine. You donât have to tell me whatâs on your mind.â Your gaze lingers on him, making his skin prickle, as you chew on the corner of your lip.Â
âItâs just..been hard to, uh, focus. Lately.â He admits.Â
âYeah. I know what you mean.â You agree in a quiet voice.Â
Samâs mouth feels suddenly dry, his tongue too big and clumsy to form any intelligent response. Youâre so close, the entire room feels charged. Youâre still swinging your feet, legs hanging off the desk, and one of your socked feet barely brushes his leg, and he nearly fucking jumps at the contact. His heartbeat becomes heavier in his chest as he wills his body to ignore the infinitesimal touch, but he can feel his blood rushing south.Â
Your phone starts going off again, and Sam expects you to hop down from the desk, to give him space to regain function in his brain, but you just ignore it.Â
âYou, uh, gonna get that?â He asks.Â
âNo. Itâs just Kyle again.â You finally look away.Â
Sam tries to fight the way his body tenses at that. âOh. AlrightâŠif you want to talk about itâŠâÂ
Your gaze snaps back to him. âTalk about what?âÂ
Sometimes you really make him feel small, like heâs not over six feet tall. Youâre just that pretty, just that alluring that you intimidate him all the way down to the marrow inside his bones.Â
âMolly told meâŠthat you guys arenât-â He clears his throat awkwardly. âArenât together anymore.âÂ
You smile kindly. âRelax, Sam. Youâre not in trouble for knowing.â To add insult to injury, you touch his arm lightly with a manicured hand. âI know everyoneâs talking about it.â
âItâs none of their business.â He says quickly, some of the certainty returning to his voice at the need to defend you.Â
âBut it's yours?â You raise your eyebrows expectantly.Â
âWell-of course not- I just meant itâs not right for anyone to discuss it behind your back for entertainment.âÂ
âThanks for saying that, Sam.âÂ
âYeah. No problem.â His voice is quieter now, too. Like youâre both afraid to speak any louder, as if it could disrupt the tense energy thatâs materialized between you.Â
âSam,â You say softly, even though heâs already looking at you and youâve had the entirety of his attention since he stepped foot in the room. âI broke up with him.âÂ
His eyebrows furrow. âMolly said-âÂ
âHeâs telling everyone it was his decision. I donât care if everyone else thinks that. But I wanted you to know.âÂ
âMe.â Sam repeats numbly. âWhy?âÂ
You grin. âYouâre supposed to be a genius or something, right? You can figure that out.âÂ
Sam knows what he wants that to mean. But this has to be either a cosmic joke or a fucking dream.Â
âWhyâd you break up with him?â He asks in a measured voice.Â
You pretend to think. âHm, well besides all the times heâd flirt with my friends right in front of my face or refuse to go down on me because he thought it was grossâŠI realized I was into someone else.âÂ
It takes a minute. Even with cognitive abilities severely diminished by your proximity, he can understand what youâre saying. Jesus, his pulse is racing.Â
âMe.â He blurts unceremoniously. âYouâre messing with me, right?âÂ
âNo, Sam.â Your eyes skate over him. âIâve always thought you were cute. But since we started studying togetherâŠI donât know. I canât stop thinking about you.âÂ
âIâŠI had no idea.âÂ
âYou really didnât know?â You ask with a soft giggle. âSam, I invited you to study in my bedroom.âÂ
âYou also had a boyfriend!âÂ
âAnd now heâs an ex-boyfriend.â You say firmly, looking away to close his prep book. You retire his study materials to the corner of the desk, in a neat little pile that he canât stop staring at until you speak again. âYour turn.âÂ
âMy turn?âÂ
âTell me why you canât focus.âÂ
Itâs been a while since Samâd slept with anyone, and now his body apparently feels like jumping to conclusions. Really, heâs helpless to the heat that spreads through his limbs and mostly to his groin. So much of your skin is bare and right there and he can easily see the shape of your body despite your clothes. And the most gratifying thing of it all is that you want him. Enough to get rid of your shitbag boyfriend. Enough to come on to him.Â
âI think you know why.â He huffs out and even that is a challenge. Anything that isnât reaching out to finally touch you is a challenge for him at this point.Â
You smile. âI think so, too. But I want to hear it.â
He hesitates to speak but his body is screaming. His ability to think is definitely compromised now by the chemistry of his desire.Â
You mistake his hesitation for unwillingness, so you gently brush the hair away from his eyes, giving him the most imploring, gentle eyes you can, and say, âPlease, Sammy.âÂ
He has to suppress the shudder that racks his spine and the emerging tightness in the crotch of his jeans. His breathing is already ragged from how turned on youâve got him by doing nothing, and heâs pretty sure heâs already leaking at the tip.Â
âAlright.â He says after swallowing. âT-This girl I study withâŠsheâs way outta my league. Sheâs beautifulâŠand I tried to avoid the way I felt about her..because she was with someone else.âÂ
You smile softly at that.Â
Sam feels compelled to keep going. âBut I want her. I want her so bad I canât think straight when Iâm around her. And when we study, itâs in her bedroom. And all I can think about is-âÂ
His words have you leaning closer to him, your own eyes subtly darkening. âThink about what?â You urge him breathlessly.Â
âPutting my hands on her. All over her.â He admits in a low voice and then waits. Youâre the one leading while he struggles to keep up.Â
âLike this?â You ask in a sultry whisper while taking his hand and putting it on your thigh. His palm nearly covers the entire width of your leg, and you both stare at it there. At the basic skin to skin contact, Samâs humiliated to feel his cock jump in his pants.Â
âYeah. Like that.â He watches his fingers dig into the plush flesh of your thigh as he grips you tighter, as if testing if youâre real. âAnd more.âÂ
âMore?â You repeat with a devious smirk, shifting subtly so now youâre seated on the desk directly in front of him. You spread your legs a bit and beckon him closer. He swallows an embarrassing noise in his throat the instant you reach a hand out to run your fingers through the shag of his hair. âWhat else, Sammy?âÂ
âAnything.â He says, entirely hypnotized by the mild authority in your soft voice. âAnything youâll let me do.â He doesnât even feel ashamed of how desperate that sounds because itâs the fucking truth. Heâs pretty sure you could ask him to lick the bottom of your shoe and he would do it.Â
That answer seems to please you, and you reward him by sliding off the desk and onto his lap. You sit sideways across his thighs, careful to avoid the bulge at his crotch, biting your lip thoughtfully as you touch his chest before wrapping an arm around the back of his neck. He doesnât even realize heâs shaking with anticipation until you say, âItâs okay, Sam,â and caress the side of his face with a tender look.Â
âCan I kiss you?â He asks, eyes glued to your glossy lips and the way your cute, pink little tongue keeps making an appearance to wet them. Feeling the weight and warmth of you, seated on his lap, his arms find their way around your waist, your skin burning hot.Â
âPlease.âÂ
Sam closes the distance between you. The second he touches your cheek, heâs astounded by how fucking soft your skin is, and then his lips touch yours, and he just stops thinking. Thereâs nothing besides the faint taste of bubblegum, the hot press of your tongue against his, his hands forgetting to be polite and gentle as he grips you hard.Â
You tug at his hair while you make out with him, eventually moving to straddle him instead. He grunts into your mouth as your weight shifts across where heâs aching in his jeans, and you giggle in response. He silences your laugh by biting your bottom lip and then kissing you deeper. As you kiss him back, your hands wander all over his back, chest, and stomach.Â
âHoly shit, Sam,â You pull away. âYouâre like ninety nine percent muscle.âÂ
He laughs softly, smiling broadly with his shoulders back. âYouâre exaggerating.âÂ
âNo, Iâm not. Youâre so hot.âÂ
Coming from you, the compliments go straight to his dick. He kisses you again, and youâre really not even moving your hips, but the minimal friction against where heâs throbbing has him clutching at your hips.Â
âYouâre so sexy and you donât even try to be.â You murmur against his lips, letting your nails scratch against his scalp and neck.Â
He finds that statement a little ridiculous, given that you look the way you do. As if you havenât been giving him blue balls for a year and a half. He doesnât know how long youâve been into him, but the fact that there was any overlap at all infuriates him, knowing you two could have been getting around to doing this sooner, rather than reviewing each otherâs practice essays.Â
Your phone starts ringing again and Sam hesitates.Â
âPlease, ignore it.â You say, lips swollen from kissing him.Â
But the call from your loser ex gives him an idea. âCan I- Would you let meâŠâ Youâre gazing at him with level patience, and so he forces himself to say it. âCan I eat you out?âÂ
You smile and bite your lip. âYou donât have to-âÂ
âI want to.â He interrupts. âReally badly, actually.â
Now that the ideaâs popped into his head, heâs not sure heâll be able to keep his sanity without doing it. And itâs perfect, because if you stay on his lap like this much longer, heâs probably going to blow his load into his jeans.Â
âYouâre not just saying that?âÂ
âLet me put my mouth on you, and then ask me that again.â He says.Â
Still holding you around the waist, he stands with minimal effort and sets you back on your desk. Yeah, heâs only doing this to impress you with his strength, but judging by the way you giggle, it works.Â
Sam lets you keep your tight fitting shirt on but lays you back and pulls your shorts down your legs. He adjusts you, so that your tailbone is at the edge of the desk, the fucking erotic sight of your cunt concealed by pink cotton panties with a little bow in the middle on full display for his greedy eyes. He takes a mental picture, wants to take a real fucking picture, but he settles for running his mouth all over the expanse of your soft thighs.Â
You sigh and moan in response, as he kisses around your hipbone. You hiss and pull his hair a little bit when he bites at your inner thigh, but the action has your legs spreading for him. Thereâs a little damp spot in the middle of your panties, and he canât stop himself from drawing closer and swallowing the mouthful of saliva that the sight brought.Â
âSam-are you sure?â You stop him, sitting up with a hand on his shoulder.Â
âLay down, baby.â He says softly. He can tell youâre a little nervous and suddenly wants to punch your douche bag ex-boyfriend for ever making you think this could be gross. âYou okay if I keep going?âÂ
âYeah,â You whisper, obeying.Â
âTrust me, baby.â He murmurs, his lips at your hip. âIâm probably going to like it more than you are.âÂ
He closes his eyes and puts his face between your legs. Youâre spreading them pretty wide, and he runs a hand up and down the expanse of your thigh to soothe you for the first drag of his tongue against the underside of your panties. A wet, shocked noise comes out of you that has him groaning in response. The sweet yet musky taste of you explodes on his tongue, and in the next instant, heâs wrestling your panties down your thighs, off from around your delicate ankles, before throwing them across the room. He uses one hand to part your thighs again, pushing them down until they almost meet the desk, and heâs not even really surprised that youâre this flexible.Â
Your pussy is glistening for him, practically screaming his name with the way it pulses gently, demanding his attention. You cry out earnestly when he latches his mouth onto your cunt, first swiping his tongue along your soaked folds, then torturing your clit with the point of his tongue until your back is arching.Â
Itâs been a while since heâs done this, but he feels like heâs doing okay, given how responsive you are. His cock fucking hurts. Having your arousal in his mouth and smeared across his face, the smell of you wrapping around his head, heâs so hard it's almost unbearable. The pressure in his groin is building rapidly the more he eats at you. Heâs thinking keep it together, Sam, keep it fucking together- until his train of thought is cut off cold when you start praising him.Â
âOh, Sam-â You moan as he assaults your clit and your thighs start to shake. âSo good, youâre so fucking good.âÂ
You're raking your hands through his hair and he glances up briefly to catch your nearly forlorn expression. Maintaining eye contact, he keeps licking at you, making sure to moan in appreciation so you can understand that heâs enjoying himself, buried in your pussy, more than he can say.Â
âMm, Sammy-â You gasp as he slides a thick finger inside your pulsing hole. Youâre so wet, both from your own sticky arousal and his saliva, that another digit slides in without much resistance, but you whimper just the same. âOh fuckkk-â
âYâtaste really good, baby.â He rasps. His lips part from your pussy just long enough for him to climb up over you, to press his lips into yours. You clutch at his shirt at the tangy taste he shares with you, letting him plunge his tongue into your mouth.Â
Sam settles back between your legs, marveling at how puffy your cunt looks now. He teases you with light kisses on the inside of your thighs, until youâre lifting your hips up for him, desperate for his mouth to slide back over you. And when it does, youâre so much more sensitive. He draws circles over your clit, then sucks it until your ass is lifting off the desk, chasing the friction.Â
âMâgonna come, Sam, ohmygod-â You whine while biting your hand.Â
Heâs swallowing your flavor, ignoring the burning in his jaw as he eats at you the best he can, his mind shutting off as you start to come. He can feel your pussy fluttering, feel your body get tense as the waves of your orgasm spring tears to your eyes. And he feels it, too. Fucking relief, as he starts spasming in his jeans, untouched, shooting rope after rope of cum right into the denim covering him.Â
He pulls his lips away from between your legs, panting, feeling the wet spot in front of his pants spread.Â
âOh my god, Sam.â You sit up, face flushed. âThat wasâŠâÂ
He feels accomplished, leaving a smart girl like you without any words.Â
âI wanna return the favor.â You say with a little smile. Naked from the waist down, you push yourself off the desk and him back into the desk chair. You let your knees hit the floor as you settle between his legs, stopping when you see the area of dampness on his jeans.Â
He flushes, still catching his breath. âI, uh, I-âÂ
âI guess you did enjoy yourself.â You smirk.Â
He watches you bonelessly as you unzip his jeans, tugging them away just enough to reveal his soiled underwear. With bright mischievous eyes holding his gaze, you hold your tongue out before licking at the cooling streaks of his come. His jaw goes slack as he watches, and you make sure to put on a show. Letting your eyelashes flutter each time your tongue dips into a milky pool of his spend, moaning hoarsely as you swallow. The act is slowly reviving his dick and by the time youâve licked the last of his release from the corner of your mouth, heâs nearly hard again.Â
After a moment, he says, âI donât think we should study together anymore.âÂ
âWhy not?â You ask, sitting yourself back in his lap.Â
âIâll fail the LSAT. I donât think Iâll ever be able to be in a room with you again withoutâŠpicturing that.â
âYou couldnât fail if you tried.â You argue.Â
âI think youâre overestimating my ability to concentrate when Iâm around you.â He laughs. âToo many thoughtsâŠgonna be way worse now.âÂ
âHm.â You smile. âWe better start getting it out of your system, then.âÂ
You suggest a shower to start, and Sam doesnât contemplate the fact that this all feels too good to be true for him. He doesnât let himself feel guilty for being here, experiencing this, meeting you, any of it. He just accepts it for what it is and follows you into the shower.Â