babygirl (dairy ver.)

@captnbbg is the art !! look at my art please!! you are victim to my thoughts probably

[captnbbgjournal]

hello :3

this is basically my journal account for the so many thoughts!

biggest interest: ateez!

i enjoy: literature (!!!), sea creatures, crafts, talking about what i like

find my art -> @captnbbg ! #bbg.art

my fanfics:

peony at sea

mid-night snacks and sirens

i’m not telling u the name cuz it’s embarrassinggg

a kiss a day, keeps sopro away

[captnbbgjournal]

i’ve had this photo saved for quite a few years and i think it’s insane that user @/jwymp3 predicted sopro and mother bird wooyoung ~3 years ago.

[i-wont-kiss-n-tell]

Sirens in the Arts

[halazihwa]

hongjoong you might want to sit down for this one there's something i have to tell you about literally every single one of your bandmates

[captnbbgjournal]

a kiss a day keeps sopro away (fic)

According to Wooyoung and Yunho, friendship is magic and might keep Sopro away and buy the crew the time they need to get back to the ship. However, the way they witnessed, tried, and tested isn’t exactly Seonghwa’s ideal way of practicing friendship. 

https://archiveofourown.org/works/88918521

i was so close to falling asleep when i had this idea a month ago, and i had to write it down before i forgot. then i wrote this on a whim a couple of days ago. this is just so silly to me

[puppydawgyunho]

I shouldn’t be at work I should be at the club. With Mingi

[captnbbgjournal]

you can take the man out of the princess but you cannot take the princess out of the man

[captnbbgjournal]

are we speedrunning the gay-olympics because genuinely the past two days have been:

1. seonghwa talking about the team rings like it’s his wedding ring (nothing new here)

2. woosan youtube channel where they will probably do Unhinged things to push back against san’s “we are not dating”

3. san showing up in wooyoung’s algorithm game video with MLB

4. seonghwa peacocking to ‘mamacita’ with the feather boa and crown and ateez (probably) howling at him (get this man in drag/burlesque/flamenco ASAP)

5. definitely missing stuff because way too much has happened. THE FUCKING FANMEET. I.E. hwagi troublemaker and whatever the hell else

[captnbbgjournal]

dreamt about the odyssey, woke up vibrating about the odyssey, & then actually hustled my ass through my morning routine to get to the theatre.

(my rating: 6.75-7/10, i’m nitpicky about my literary adaptations)

[captnbbgjournal]

love when people criticize (my interest) because it’s needed and they are not excused and i know it’s wrong, but also hate when people criticize (my interest) bc it makes me sad and think i cannot like said interest (even though i can like it and know what could be better)

[captnbbgjournal]

where is the jongho content from fanmeeting? !!!!

[thirstkanaphan]

Mingi x Seonghwa cover Trouble Maker

[gfwooyo]

so seonghwa is publishing his first book of poems and the proceeds will go to child welfare facilities???

MY SEONGHWAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[captnbbgjournal]

woosan video #4: we get married in vegas

[octeeztic]

I love these songs for how they lull me through their atmospheric trance. These songs make me wanna close my eyes and float as they wash over my soul. Anyone else catch my drift

[captnbbg]

my really long & disorganized understanding of the lore (+ 'BAD' trailer analysis)

god is a woman Sopro is a woman ✅ win for feminism!

(please share your thoughts with me!) personally, i interpret the current state of the lore as this:

Treasure to The World -- (A)teez were a bunch of lost boys who were trying to find themselves out of their central issues, and eventually found solace in each other and music. However, they didn't face their issues which lead to discord within the group, and they fell apart. (Z)teez Hongjoong (Halajoong) came to (A)Hongjoong to tell him "hey man we need you to fix our world lol cuz you look like me and we are Imprisoned btw." Hongjoong then had a way of getting the band back together, and that's how we went from Treasure series, to Fever, to The World.

The World to Golden Hour Part.1 -- The World consists of the boys addressing their personal issues as they explore this world that restricts self-expression and identity. They find a way to face each of their fears/insecurities through defying this alternat government, as well as committing anarchy and several crimes <3. after Strictland (Strickland?) is Dealt with, they have to deal with the aftermath which leads to Golden Hour.

Golden Hour Part.1 (ongoing) -- It's not easy trying to recooperate from a literal revolution that you were an integral part of lol. and although they have gotten rid of the problem, there is the matter of reconstruction (so relevant to america lmao guys is this play about us). Part.1 introduces the concept of individuality, where they go from being a team to being individuals with their own futures and lives (i.e. SH is a firefighter, HJ an author, WY flight attendant, etc). In a way, these jobs aren't even about pursuing their passions as they wanted to before, but also finding a way to cope with the anxiety that came from experiences they have lived through in the previous chapter. I haven't had time to reflect on Part.2 to Part.4 (average uni experience), but I do think they are strongly following the various emotions that come with continuing to live, after you free yourself from your past, learning to live in the present (Part.2 diaries).

Part.2 (continued) -- Because they start to live more in the present and anxiety chucks you into the future a lot, they start to feel they are forgetting Z and what it's like to be all 8, and they also happen to rediscover Sopro, which was given by Left Eye (some dude in the fields from Fever pt.2). 7 of them let the thought go, except Wooyoung. Wooyoung is the one who brings up the fact that none of them are really living their dreams and what if they just give it another go. The others are just like "um.. anyways" which triggers Wooyoung to awaken Sopro because he wants the others to feel what he feels. He misses what they all had, what used to be their "Fever" to find their "Treasure", and he wants to relive an envisioned "Golden Hour". I'm sorry that sounded so corny.

Part.3 (continued) -- annnnd we all know what happens here. Sopro wreaks havoc and I believe Sopro has been taking it one member at a time. i.e. Wooyoung is the 'mother bird' because he awakened it. Sopro does sync the emotions, and the idea of wanting to try again as a group, but I think it also projects Wooyoung's specific emotions regarding the dissociation caused by Sopro. He mentions there is a dissociation between how he felt vs. what he thought, and the Golden Hour series might be the introduction to that. Part.3 introduces us to Sopro and the feeling of indulgence. But what comes after over-indulgence? guilt. Boom. also "HJ: It looks like it learned a new emotion... which means it has also moved to a new person" on Sopro. IYF version touches on embarrassment, which morphs into Shame in Part.4 (clarification because there is overlap btwn IYF and Part.4 diary entries)

Part.4 to Part.5 (unfinished) -- I haven't really thought this far and i should be working, but I think they will explore Shame as an extension of Embarrassment as they introduced in Part.4 diary entries. they also expanded on Sopro as a character; Sopro is inherently harmful but at the same time unaware that it is causing harm to the people it uses as vessels. The woman in Part.4 diaries feels huge amounts of shame, and after Sopro is removed from her, it is confused as to why Wooyoung (mother bird) is causing it feelings of hurt. It seems to be able to acknowledge hurt but not use theory of mind to apply that to the vessels it occupies. weird as fuck guy. Part.4 just has Sopro monologue and it is Depressed get this thing a therapist fr. I know I am missing something about Adrenaline but just pretend that's Yunho being possessed and hot even though it doesn't really line up here cuz I haven't thought about it.

Part.4 Sopro analysis -- I am a huge literature nerd and a developmental psychology student. Sopro's nature to me felt like that of a toddler learning shame and doubt vs autonomy (Erikson's second stage of psychosocial development), and they even confirm that in the diary entries at the end, as well as imply it's the "resurrection of Frankenstein['s creature]". Frankenstein (Mary Shelley) famously explores themes of parental abandonment and allegorizes how that affects a child, literally Frankenstein's creature.

HALAZIA Sopro interlude --

remember this thing? i think sopro came from this, because they say it came from the 'halazia'. Hala means various things in different languages. the most notable ones to me were Arabic, Marathi, and Sanskrit translations. In Arabic names, it refers to "moon halo" (one of many sources). It can also be linked to the Ancient Greek root for "halo", or άλως (álos). HALAZIA has a lot of moon references and so does The World Ep.Fin with the red moon glow. In Marathi, it can be hāla (हाल | haal), a plight or 'distressful condition', or haḷa (हळ | hal), hot air blast. Sorpo is a Portuguese word for 'blow, puff, small blast of air'. Therefore, I do think this makes perfect sense because a little gust of air that causes distress coming from a hot air blast? also would explain how San didn't straight up Die with that thing donked on him. It makes sense as to why Sopro is an amplification of emotions because the halazia was an ammoglation of emotions from Strictland residents. I forgot where I was going with this cuz I got too excited with etymology.

1. the cloaked person is sopro's current vessel

At the end of the Part.4 Diaries, there is news of a body erupting from the ground, and it being "the resurrection of Frankenstein", which makes me believe this woman, the dangerous woman with red eyes and red light, is Sopro's new vessel.

Side note -- I am loving the idea that sopro likes to present as a woman. i support women's rights and wrongs. would also be fun if they tackle the idea that women are inherently the cause of problems (i.e. eve and the apple) because in part.4 diary book it's implied Sopro is unaware of the harm its existence and posession causes. insert something about societal expections of women in religious scenarios. people in the diary entry also did think the changes because of Sopro were a religious phenomenon so.

ANYWAYS -- this chapter will probably explore themes of autonomy and abandonment, maybe how that will itself will manifest into doubt and shame, and a secret third thing that I cannot think of rn. Mary Shelley and Erikson wake up we got Ateez in your corner.

2. yeosang is Next

There is a segment in the Part.3 Dairy entries that touches on Yeosang's depression and a flashback from when the Guardians trapped him. He's described as "stood frozen in place and lost in despair", with despair being the opposite of hope, and a synonym being Doubt (i might be a genius /j). His dissociative episode isn't expanded on but I do think that makes him more vulnerable to Sopro's influence, with the misunderstanding that Sopro absorbing his emotions can make him feel better. Depression can be experienced as a lack of emotions, a numbness, but it can also be an emotion in itself, a mood, which is how i think it's presented here. Yeosang, don't look at women! they could be Sopro!

3. malfoy... what is the plot even

idk i just wanted to talk about this. what is his problem.

4. i'm telling you yunho is evil or something

okay this bullet is clickbait but I do think that yunho might be the only one who hasn't been touched by Sopro! There was this theory I saw but I can't remember from who, that said in Adrenaline Yunho's dance break shows that he's the only one who hasn't been Under the Influence yet, compared to Hongjoong who has been, but Knows what's up. Yunho might have gotten into discord with Mingi and crew in the concept trailer because he isn't influenced, but Hongjoong is the spectator because he just Knows something is Up. idk i haven't thought this one out yet either, please share if you have ideas!! i'm sooo intrigued

that's all thank you for reading if you did, im kissing you or whatever you like <333

I NEED THIS COMEBACK NOWWWAUUUUGUHA

im sorry if none of this made sense i can't reread it anymore i might cry