carver

21 // he // queer & trans & autistic // rp and fanfiction connoissuer.

[carvaraad]

currently going through my entire ao3 repertoire since 2017. wondering if I should post the stats I have for everything

[broodwoof]

been thinking a lot about solas and masochism lately 👀 (well, more than usual lmao)

it arouses him to be hurt. it's vulnerable, intense on a sensory level, and comes with a really heightened anxiety/anticipation that is soothed by the painful action - the anticipation snaps into pure sensation. then the anticipation returns, and it's cyclical and consuming

but I also think there's a muddiness to it wrt his guilt. he feels that he deserves to be punished. feels that someone taking a sadistic pleasure in his pain is right, just. it feels like an act of contrition, a deserved suffering...

which is further conflicted bc he's not actually suffering as such. he feels - perhaps consciously, but certainly subconsciously - that he deserves to suffer; but then his response to it is arousal, pleasure. so it's not suffering anymore. he's getting off on his deserved punishment, which makes him feel guilty and dirty, but imo he has some mixed up feelings about humiliation and shame and arousal, largely bc of how these things occur together

so on the surface, he's pleased by receiving pain

underneath, he's gratified to receive a punishment which feels just: guilty that he takes pleasure in his punishment: ashamed that it arouses him: further aroused by his shame: which seems to require further punishment

(I'm digging into this in my fic where he's the sadist btw. there's a lot of character and relationship work that's present in that fic!)

[featherfangart]

9:41 Griffon Wing Keep

The Inquisitor assigned Ulric to look after the keep before the Inquisition forces arrive to take Adamant. The Warden Commander, being a Fereldan through and through, hating the desert sun and heat, hearing the Calling, spends a lot of nights awake (napping through the day), chatting up the watch or just... listening.

[eebie]

[carvaraad]

new vocal stim just dropped

EVERYONE

AAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAA

[werld-is-mine]

they give you a free copy of dragon age 2 when you come out as bisexual, actually

[aeide]

lest we all forget:

[carvaraad]

da:tv and the tragedy that was the making of the game and the likelihood that there won't be a continuation makes my heart hurt so much that even interacting with dragon age content is excruciating which is hard considering it's my #1 hyperfixation.

[broodwoof]

also veilguard gave us solarric shippers just... the most

[emmavakarian-theirin]

has this been done?

[video version]

[ghostieking]

me and my homies support real artists who put their passion into their pieces instead of a machine who rips off the hard work of talented peeps

[ashiart]

perfect meme for him

[carvaraad]

WE'RE SO BACK

[carvaraad]

anders and karl sailor song. anders and karl sailor song.

[lostiel]

davrin | get to know your companions

[kvltboyfriend]

fun idea: stop telling trans people how hard it is to use their new names and pronouns

[certifiedsexed]

Certified Sex ED Post!

[feeshies]

Guys I’m going to make a hot take

[feeshies]

The whole “I wish I could be with a woman, but instead I’m stuck with my stupid, gross husband/boyfriend” sentiment I see repeated in bi circles is just the “progressive” queer version of the boomer “I hate my wife” jokes

[cumaeansibyl]

if he’s stupid and gross you should leave him and if he isn’t you’re just being cruel for internet points and he should leave you

[carvaraad]

sorry I'm crying, guys, I just thought of Solas killing his qpp again :(