catonspeedland

well... that escalated quickly

[catchymemes]

[catonspeedland]

Daaaaaaaayyyyyyyuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmm

[catonspeedland]

Hi! May I know who your face claim is for Female!Tony Stark?

Sometimes it’s Rebecca hall, Monica Bellucci, or Sophia Loren

[bunny-banana]

[hjbender]

I agree.

[bramblepatch]

Nicholas J Fury spent one weekend in the 90s hanging out with a cool lesbian and then spent the next twenty years trying and failing to find another superhero with her general degree of competence or emotional maturity

[shakespork]

nick fury watching the events of civil war unfold: carol wouldn’t do this to me

[irrelevant-curiosities]

This has such an insane type of energy to it… Like I don’t even know how to start describing it

Prada Fall/Winter 2012

[noirsilk-deactivated20200913]

Woah

[hariboo]

i can sum it up: vampires, specifically dracula, at various stages of his life

[catonspeedland]

For the totalitarian leader on the go...

Because fashun doesn’t need to be fascist.

[bandydear]

Carol Danvers, on the Avengers ship PA: Attention ladies and nerds, this is your captain speaking. We are en route towards a big purple jerk off with my foot inbound towards his ass. We’ll be making a quick break at the International Space Station for me to high five my kid before entering hyperspace. At current cruising speed we should reach our destination in about seven hours. Please keep your hands and feet inside the craft at all times and please refrain from touching my cat. Now, can I get a booyah? Can I get a yeehaw?

Avengers:

Thor: BOOYAH! YEEHAW!

[copperbadge]

Nick Fury from beyond the grave: YOUR CAT, WOMAN? I gave that cat an eye and scooped its litter the last TWENTY FOUR YEARS gonna call it YOUR CAT

[the-feather-theory]

Thanos: *snaps his fingers*

Fury: *dies*

Goose: sir that was my emotional support human

[gifsboom]

[writing-prompt-s]

Two magicians made a blood oath when they were children that they would never harm each other. Now they are mortal enemies and have resorted to inconveniencing and annoying each other, knowing if they harm one another they’ll die.

[tumblunni]

I want to watch this show

[ralfmaximus]

That’s actually how one of them torments the other: by hiring a film crew to follow them around and broadcast their lives as a reality show.

[lukcskywalkcrs]

dir. Taika Waititi

[catonspeedland]

I would watch this so hard

[carnival-phantasm]

[dicksmasher]

this is the funniest fucking thing i have ever seen

[sailoruranus-archive]

“Pet crows give their owners names. This is identified by a unique sound they make around specific people that they would not otherwise make.“

oh my GOD

[jackhawksmoor]

well shit

[ambular-d]

Clearly, to the crows, we’re the pets.

[catonspeedland]

Sky cats

[clintscoffeepot]

“Depression turns you into a series of nouns, without the adjectives and without the verbs. You don’t remember where you misplaced your descriptions, your actions … You become: bed, shower, socks, coffee, keys, obligations.”— A Series of Nouns

[tyrannyoftheurgent]

Comic book Clint is everything to me

[rayshippouuchiha]

Tony: *drifting through space hours from death*

Rhodey & Carol: * pulling up to his spaceship with wedding rings on* Hey loser let’s go kill a Titan.

Tony: I haven’t eaten in 4 days, that grape gonna die today.

[acesapphic]

Ready for a long ace-centric metaphor about sex? 

Alright, so. Coffee. I don’t drink coffee. I have no desire to drink coffee. I find people who enthusiastically go on about the flavor differences of lattes, espressos, and french press brews, both amusing and mildly baffling. All the coffee ads. Coffee jokes. Bustling coffee shops. To me, all coffee is similarly bitter and unpleasant. I have been through so many “Try this, it’s sweet! You can’t even taste the coffee!”  Alas, I always can. And I’m  sensitive to caffeine anyway. So, I don’t really think about drinking it when I wake up or am tired.

 Yet I love the smell of coffee. I love the idea of coffee. The feeling of a warm cup taking the chill from my fingers, the cozy ritual of having a drink and chat. I might try someone’s coffee. If they ask, if I want to please them and share in something they enjoy. I am also perfectly capable of learning the preferences of those I care about and creating a cup for their pleasure. 

But I don’t want coffee, generally speaking. I will probably make a face after trying their coffee and wash the taste out with something else. They may rush to reassure me that it is an acquired taste. And I’ll have to reply that it’s a taste I don’t particularly care about acquiring in the way they did. ‘Drink it till you like it’ will never work for me.

 But that doesn’t mean I am against coffee or think people shouldn’t drink it. Doesn’t mean I’ve taken a vow to never drink any. And sure, maybe if you get one of those sugar and whipped cream disasters, more of a warm milkshake than a cup of coffee, I’ll probably be happier sipping it with you. But honestly? I’d rather smell someone else’s coffee and not be expected to drink it. I’d really rather have the heat and sweetness of my hot cocoa. 

[onemillionspiders]

I love this

[daja-the-hypnokitten]

The best part is it works for ALLLL the ace spectrum! Maybe you like one specific type of coffee on rare occasions! Maybe you enjoy coffee when you’re sharing the drink with someone! Maybe you can’t even stand the smell of coffee!

This needs to be on my blog.

[writing-prompt-s]

Reincarnation is a known, common, and expected result of death. You are a bounty hunter that specializes in tracking down people who have committed suicide to escape debts or a jail sentence.

[charlesoberonn]

“It’s a girl!” the doctor exclaimed.

“It’s a fucking tax dodger is what is it!” Blaize ‘The Flame’ Hogan burst into the infirmary, cocking his shotgun.

[catonspeedland]

I would watch the shit out of this movie.

[wikketkrikket]

So you know this scene...

I always found it a bit odd. Hilarious, but it raised too many questions. When did Steve make these? Why did Steve make these? How did he manage to be so cheesy and overly sincere knowing how much crap he would get from the other Avengers for it?

Well, today my sister told me her headcanon. Picture the scene. Steve leans on the back of a chair, as above. Peter immediately launches into ‘So, you got detention…’. Cap blinks. Peter awkwardly tries to explain. It turns out Cap has no idea what videos he means, and neither do any of the other Avengers.

So they get in touch with the company who made them, and they swear blind that it was really the real Captain America, and that it all his idea. That he came in and said how much he wanted to help the youth of today.And the Avengers all lose it because someone is running around doing an unbelievably good impression of Captain America, they could have destroyed his reputation, they could have infiltrated the Avengers; and instead all they are apparently using it for is to make silly, embarrassing videos.

It’s completely baffling. Who could possibly be behind it all?

A mystery.

[catonspeedland]

#head cannoned so fucking hard