tannertan36
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Cosimo Galluzzi
Janaina Medeiros
will byers stan first human second
hello vonnie
noise dept.
Not today Justin
occasionally subtle
NASA
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Jules of Nature
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TVSTRANGERTHINGS
todays bird
Claire Keane
art blog(derogatory)
AnasAbdin
seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from Malaysia
seen from United Kingdom
seen from United States
seen from United States
seen from Indonesia
seen from Belarus
seen from United States
seen from Ukraine
seen from United States
seen from Italy
seen from Türkiye
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seen from United States
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@catsandwitchcraft
Disney has asked you to choose the next Muppet adaption of classic literature. Which do you pick?
Muppet Great Gatsby
Muppet Dracula
Muppet Pride and Prejudice
Muppet Odyssey
Muppet Count of Monte Cristo
Muppet Moby Dick
Muppet Hamlet
Muppet War of the Worlds
Muppet Metamorphosis
(Bonus points if you explain how you would adapt it in the tags)
so many ppl on tiktok will be like 'look at my epic style glow up omg my style used to be so cringe' and it just shows them wearing clothes that were in fashion in 2015 and then clothes that are in fashion now like baby that's what happens when u don't have ur own sense of style
got called “omg vintage” by a secretary in training at the dentist’s office on sunday because i wore a shirt that was in style five years ago like. ma’am i bought that in 2016
this is WILD you can't just leave this in the tags lmaoo
(cw: adult story below)
okay so basically the story went that he has. a fetish for guys with tats and piercings and this culminated in him getting real teeth KNOCKED OUT during a glory hole incident in 98 or 99 he can’t remember but basically the guy thrust in as he was catching his breath. and. teeth got knocked out. he was THAT HARD.
so he gets dental implants and continues on his way, assured that he’ll never have to lose any more teeth. he used to bartend blah blah and was always complimented on his teeth but he eventually got them SNAPPED OUT during an altercation with a drunk guy and he got different ones put in and was like “oh, so this is a recurring theme in my life” and decided that he was going to swear off bartending.
so he moved out this way and started his “dick-sucking career” anew, hopeful, wide-eyed. and managed to get a piercing snagged on his fucking tonsil and they have to GO TO THE EMERGENCY ROOM TOGETHER BECAUSE THE GUY IS STUCK IN HIS FUCKING THROAT AND HE CAN ONLY BREATHE IF HE BREATHES AROUND THE DICK. it was at this moment i remembered that one fucking movie where a guy gets his prince albert piercing stuck in a lady as a killer is busting into the room and dies because he won’t cut it off and run or something
also as this is happening i’m waiting on x-ray results so i’m just. there lmao
and he was talking about how the guy NUTTED. IN THE AMBULANCE. BECAUSE OF THE VIBRATION OF THE ROAD. IN HIS THROAT. AND THEY HAD TO SUCTION IT OUT. WHAT THE FUCK. but it turns out that there was a bad cut to his gums as well because it was a spiked fucking piercing so he just. had to get a couple teeth replaced. again.
and they dated. for 2 more years. until he moved to serbia or something i forget that part i was laughing to hard. it might have been spain. idk anyways
the bf got stopped by airport security because this was a few years after 9/11 and he had to take half his piercings which were not “safe metals” for metal detectors (“because DIY punks are hotter” was his reason??) and he was like “do i take the dick one out too” (no, but he did get taken to be privately searched.) and it ended up, that his boyfriend (the guy in the dental office) laughed so hard, after hearing this story repeated, that he slipped and smacked face first into the edge of a table. and LOST HIS TEETH AGAIN, and ended up walking around “like a fucking christmas carol about wanting two front teeth” until his bf sent him money to get them fixed and then broke up with him “for some hot young thing”
so he gets new ones! and they lasted! they really did! for years!
and then, #4, was on sunday. he was so “inspired” after he was allowed to go on dates again. because quarantine and no-socialising rules and shit have hit hard here multiple times. that he “went too hard” at a small gay bdsm gathering. and he managed to both bend his teeth inwards and fuck his molars up FROM DICK SUCKING. and he was like “i was tied up there, thinking about how many times this has happened. and how some evil gay witch put a curse on me for being too good at sucking dick.”
and he went on about how the kink club in question is technically helping to pay for this because they felt SO BAD and the guy who did this laughed his ass off and was like. i don’t have any money but once you get your teeth fixed - and the guy was like NO. I AM NOT SUCKING YOU OFF EVER AGAIN LOOK WHAT YOU DID
also this was told by the most middle-aged, boring looking man on earth. like picture an accountant, but gay and VERY clumsy and funny
aren’t you nervous about the vaccine? what made you want to get it
free bandaid
Uuuhhhh??? So, I guess I took an unintentional extended hiatus because, well, 2020 was just Too Much. So, uhm, hey everyone who suddenly started to follow me. But like...why, exactly? Lol
Here's a picture of my cat King George III just cause.
"you've changed" i sure hope so bro i just did my magical girl transformation sequence
meirl
This has been the gen x experience our entire lives
Part of what’s so great about Sleeping Beauty is that i’s about like one very intense day in Aurora’s life. For sixteen years she picks berries and minds her business and like one right after another it’s ‘you’re fallen in love but it doesn’t matter’ ‘you’re a princess’ ‘we’re not your real aunts’ ‘you’re engaged to a stranger’ ‘you’re going home to your real parents’ ‘magic is real and we wield it’ and that onslaught of constant life-altering information is why she is the princess best poised to survive 2020
aurora’s last words after pricking her finger: oh thank fuck some time to process all this
target audience of less than ten individuals
My target audience is me and even that bastard is impossible to please
VIDEO SOURCE
(Turn on the sound!!)
I hate when my character knows ten things but I only know two things.
“Stop. Talking,” I grunt, typing in another google search. “Stop making me look bad.”
“Trees can explode if their sap freezes,” my character chirps.
“Whatcha doin’ today, Spider?” “Mmmm, just workin’ on the next enamel pin Kickstarter… “
❤❤❤❤!
Saskatoon Daily Star, Saskatchewan, November 1, 1918
Jeff Goldblum decided to recreate his classic shirtless pose to encourage people to vote.
Because I’m a cool guy that knows what the people want, I sourced the highest resolution images I could find–allowing you to ogle with maximum fidelity.
Also, for your convenience, I created an animated GIF that smoothly transitions from Young & Curly to Salt & Peps Goldblum.
Whoopsie-daisy!
Wrong one!
Here it is.
So embarrassing!
They tried it
Don’t think that my boy Andy doesn’t know that neither
he said i won’t get dragged on y’alls behalf
Aslo This:
Support your local bakeries, libraries, beekeepers, diviners, and soapmakers.
Especially if they’re witches. But also if they’re mundane. Keep your town alive, keep those economics flowing, and you’ll build not only great local businesses, but relationships with businesses that you can actually trust.
To the person who reblogged this with a “no animal products stipulation”, this is the wrong blog for that! Support small and hobbyist farmers with humane animal rearing practices! Buy their eggs! Buy their milk and cheese! Buy their wool and fiber! We’re all in this together!!!
