𝓜𝓲𝓭𝓷𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 𝓡𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓸

[rainveined]

     Okay, so I just finished setting up(for the most part) && I’m still a bit of a train wreck, but could you guys give this post a like or a reboogle if you guys wouldn’t mind interacting with a Independent Lance McClain from Voltron: Legendary Defender.

A bit about me:

       My name Is Spencer && I am OC && Crossover Friendly, however I am private meaning I’m mutuals only. I look forward to interacting with you guys !

[cfazureskies-blog]

     one m o n t h

[jockcharm-deactivated20170525]

on selectivity & why being selective or private is not the same as “elitism”:

there are a few other posts like this out there but this became relevant & i felt the need to do a small write up on this.

if you’ve been in indie rp long or even just a little while it’s likely you’ve seen the words “selective” and / or “private” ( sometimes both at the same time ) floating around. if you’ve been in indie rp long then you’ve also probably seen the word “elitist” floating around as well, often times when describing specific rpers or fandoms that are particularly selective & / or private. 

some people might not know what this means but here’s a run down of how i have seen most people describe it:

selective:

can be choosy with who they choose rp with

private:

only roleplays with mutual followers ( meaning they follow their rp partner and their rp partner follows them )

BEING SELECTIVE AND / OR PRIVATE IS NOT THE SAME AS ELITISM.

it’s understandable that some people may take it as a personal slight when an rper who is private & / or selective chooses not to rp with them, but don’t be confused. it isn’t. selectivity is not elitism. elitism in the way it is most commonly used by people in the rp community tends to paint roleplayers labelled it as “snobbish” aka: “one who despises, ignores, or is patronizing to those they consider inferior”. 

selectivity can come across as being ignoring of those who are “inferior” but the truth of the matter is more often than not the selectivity of a particular roleplayer or fandom has more to do with the any number of the following:

they have had bad past experiences and retain selectivity in order to keep themselves safe & comfortable

they have anxiety 

they have a lot of followers and therefore a lot of potential threads & are attempting to keep things orderly & under control as to not become overwhelmed

they prefer an uncluttered dash to keep anxiety at a minimum

they have anxiety & prefer to stay within a certain group of people because it helps them feel safe & comfortable

they have trouble maintaining muse if their writing doesn’t mesh well with the other person

they have trouble maintaining muse if they feel they can’t get along with the other mun ooc

so basically what i’m saying is writers are selective & private NOT because they feel you are inferior or are “elitist” but because:

roleplaying is a hobby

selectivity helps keep that hobby fun, safe, comfortable & easy to maintain for them

IT IS RARELY IF EVER a personal slight against you or because they do not like you specifically. it is almost always because of one of the reasons listed above. selectivity helps maintain an individuals rp space safe, fun, comfortable, a hobby what roleplaying is.

please stop making those who are selective & / or private feel guilty for maintaining these things. being turned down to roleplay with someone can be disheartening but in my experience it is rarely a personal slight against you and can be for any number of reasons outside of it. making that roleplayer feel guilty for turning you down is a manipulative and not good thing to do and is actually more than likely a part of WHY so many roleplayers are selective & / or private. making people feel guilty for maintaining their hobby and keeping it a hobby for them kind of defeats the purpose of roleplay. 

additionally, NO ONE OWES YOU AN EXPLANATION for why they do not want to write with / follow you. i understand that can be a hard pill to swallow but more often than not in my personal rp experience, explaining to someone why i do not want to write with / follow them has led to unnecessary drama or them being unnecessarily rude about it when i have been nothing but polite. you are not ever owed an explanation for why these things are. explaining those things can cause those rpers unnecessary anxiety, stress, & drama that– once again– makes roleplay less of a hobby than it should be.

people have the right to not want to roleplay and / or follow you. the sooner you accept that that is not against you personally, the easier this hobby will become, trust me.

additionally, even if people don’t like you specifically or your writing that is THEIR OPINION which they are entitled to & which may impact whether or not they want to write with you & that still doesn’t really make them elitist, it just means they have a personal preference that you don’t fit. it might be a hard reality check, but roleplay doesn’t revolve around you or me or anyone. all of us will be faced with people no matter who we are who do not like our writing, our choice in muse, our characterization, who we are ooc,  AND THAT IS PERFECTLY HUMAN & OKAY. if that happens, you are still not allowed to make them feel guilty for that. actually, you’re allowed to, no one can stop you, it just still doesn’t make it any less inappropriate for you to make people feel bad about their preferences or get haughty about it and label it “elitist” because god forbid someone doesn’t like you or your writing or is selective in a way that excludes you.

the bottom line is — selectivity is for comfort, safety, & to keep things fun. whether a selective rpers choice not to roleplay with you is because they don’t like you specifically or not doesn’t matter. it doesn’t make it elitist. and it is NEVER appropriate to make people feel guilty over these things.

guilt tripping & starting conflict over selectivity does not help things. it makes people feel guilty, it actually contributes to that selectivity, it’s petty and  it causes anxiety & unnecessary stress to a HOBBY ( god how many times do i need to remind people this is a hobby and not a job ).

something that’s ESPECIALLY important is that seeing as selectivity can many times directly tie in to an individuals mental health ( re: anxiety, depression, etc. ) guilt tripping is ESPECIALLY bad & can have severely negative impacts on those things. ignoring this is a really crap thing to do & hurts a lot of people & just in general perpetuates some nasty things. selectivity can be a tool to help with anxiety and depression as well as other mental health things that impact how people roleplay and spend their time here. guilt tripping applies to that in really bad ways and, again, calling selectivity “elitist” applies to those things as well. something i wish more people would keep in mind.

FURTHERMORE, HOWEVER, YOU ARE NOT OBLIGATED TO ANYONE’S TIME. NO ONE IS OBLIGATED TO ROLEPLAY WITH OR FOLLOW YOU. DON’T MAKE PEOPLE FEEL BAD ABOUT THESE THINGS IT’S NOT COOL.

[cfazureskies-blog]

princess--cynthia

 A summary of my morning

congrats on almost dying

      It was a black bear and she ran off like as soon as I yelled. 

[cfazureskies-blog]

A summary of my morning

Me, walking through the woods: Oh shIT A BEAR!!!

The bear: Oh shIT A HUMAN!!! -runs off-

Me: -Runs in the other direction-

[cfazureskies-blog]

      Lets play a game of ‘Is spencer here or are they dead for real this time’.

[mariatallchief]

Dancers of BalletMet in Becoming Violet; directed by Steven Weinzierl and choreographed by Edwaard Liang (x)

[cfazureskies-blog]

gealdricge //whispers fave blog /always/REPLY

and yet i doki every time i see your icon on any of my dashes B))))

gealdricge //whispers fave blog /always/

ps not liek i’m any better????

    Will u still love me when I’m no longer young and mulletful tho

[cfazureskies-blog]

//whispers fave blog /always/

     but y doe ?

[cfazureskies-blog]

☆ Put this star into the inbox of your favourite blogs!! Everyone loves a little positivity! ( ´ ▽ ` ).｡ｏ♡

     Ahh thank you, but I’m not a huge fan of sending chainmail because It feels a bit impersonal to me, but I’m glad that someone thought of me when sending something out ^^

[cfazureskies-blog]

      okay but modern inigos music taste being a wild mash up of modern and then outta nowhere theres like things from the 40s/50s/60s and he’s gotta thing for 80′s electropop as well. Like you don’t ask him what music he’s listening to at any moment in time because u might get some weird shit™.

[cfazureskies-blog]

princess--cynthia replied to your post “       After four days away, I rise       Did I miss anything cool?”

Just in time for kjelles birthday. Coincidence? I think not

     jokes on u,because i the mun, suck at keeping track of even fictional characters birthdays, as well as the birthdays of real people.

[christopherrose-pa]

A brief note to my rp partners

[sixba-archive]

farseerkhareraa:

christopherrose-pa:

I am probably one of the worst rp partners in the history of the activity. - I drop threads. - I lose threads. - I take my threads in odd directions that should probably never be explored. - I go through phases where I’ll only respond to two or three of my partners. - I go through phases where I’ll only respond to a single thread, and you’re left wondering why I’m not responding to you.

Sometimes I can be a really great partner - - I might be really on top of replies. - I might have everything in my ask box answered. - I might be perfectly in synch with where you’re trying to take the thread.

Sometimes I’m not.

But the great thing is that it’s okay! - When I drop a thread you like just tell me! Chances are it’s in drafts or I’ve lost it. - Even if we try a dozen different things and nothing sticks, don’t be afraid to start a new thread with me or come to me with an idea. - Sometimes I’ll be overwhelmed by everything I have going on, and I’ll have to put you on the list of rp’s to start. - Sometimes I’ll jump right on the thread and then drop it after a few days. - Sometimes we’ll carry the thread out all the way to the end, and have a grand old time getting there.

But please, remember that each of my rp partner is valuable to me. - Even the ones my muse doesn’t like. - Even the ones I’ve only done a thread or two with. - Even the ones I used to rp with and don’t any more.

You are significant.

You matter.

This. This is so important in so many ways.

[cfazureskies-blog]

       After four days away, I rise

      Did I miss anything cool?

[eggspionage-archive-deactivated]

me @ people who drop threads:  i aM SO *clenches fist*…. not angry at all because it’s your blog and you can do what you want and rping is a hobby and you never gotta force yourself or your muses to do anything thank you. seriously guys i need you to remember that it is ALWAYS okay to a) drop threads  b) reply to a MILLION other things first  c) let things sit in your drafts for AGES if necessary. this is your hobby and you shouldn’t stress over replies. please keep in mind that you don’t owe anybody on here. also please keep in mind that i am awlays open for NEW things if you are not feeling a certain thread. take care, have FUN– it’s what this website is for. improve your creativity, have fun and, if anything, REDUCE your stress. not add to it.

[cfazureskies-blog]

     project bravo papa is almost done, all i gotta do is do some extra bonus work, and then some other extra work on little deets and then, then bravo papa will be up and running.

[cfazureskies-blog]

❝ I get progressively uglier throughout the day ❞

This Website I swear 2 naga || ❀

     “I would say same, but to be honest,      I don’t really think you make a transformation      throughout the day. At most you look a little      tired, unless you’re better at hiding it than       I am. Either way, you’re still the prettiest       woman in Nohr.”

@maidfaire