I'm gonna hit you with a Hylux

Charlie | He/Him | Dumb jock himbo | Seattle

[targetedknowledge]

[parkchanwoohoo]

The facial expressions of everyone trying not to lose it are killing me

[gunsandfireandshit]

This is painfully American

[dirtbaby2016]

Americans be like it is totally normal for an entire stadium (including military members) to stand at attention while a fast food clown mascot sings the national anthem

[unstablebill]

when we say "it is functionally impossible to parody Americans in a way that will actually insult them" this is the sort of thing you're up against. is your sick burn funnier than corporation burger clown sing national anthem baseball game? no?? of course it isn't.

[illusoryfem]

[pangur-and-grim]

I told my little nephew that I'd wave at his airplane when it flew over my house today, and he very calmly and politely explained that it wouldn't be possible to see me due to the limitations of human vision. I said he just had to squint real hard, and he took a deep breath and went into the toddler version of "see, what you're not understanding–"

[pangur-and-grim]

[catcrumb]

[simkaye]

Professional mouser for hire! Inquire below 🐈‍⬛

[fincherly]

past-tense slogans

[fincherly]

we were farmers

[fincherly]

nationwide was on your side

[horrible-memes-deactivated20201]

You were in good hands

[fincherly]

because you were worth it

[fincherly]

only you couldve stopped forest fires

[allegedly-human]

nothing is more tumblr than having a tumblr sexyman wiki and then warn you to not find some of those men sexy because it's problematic

[sentient-tent]

This is Tie, she is going to eat all of the notes

[sentient-tent]

reblog to feed her notes

[elodieunderglass]

How is she doing this

[gleafer]

Jimothy’s origin story!

[release-the-sheep]

just witnessed something devastating

guy on the subway with one ear pierced, little gold hoop. other guy on the subway very quickly and subtly googling "which one is the gay ear". it is not the gay ear. visible disappointment on his face as he puts his phone away.

[apollos-boyfriend]

the problem with having a The Character that sucks ass is that you can’t even turn to them in times of need. god forbid i find myself asking what The Character would do in my situation because the answer would probably be catastrophically harmful for my everything. can’t rely on them for shit. absolutely abysmal emotional support

[apollos-boyfriend]

[corrodedparadox]

Year of the horsie

[gothiccharmschool]

Yes, this is my circus, those are my monkeys, and yes I deliberately gave them those flamethrowers.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

it does still make me insane specifically how many queer people lovingly embrace astrology. I went to a poetry workshop yesterday that was genuinely quite good but also included an option to disclose astrology designations during introductions and so many people broke out some variation of "I'm a [x] sum but I have a [y] placement and it SHOWS" girl no it doesn't. that's meaningless correlation you completely invented the causation

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I'd say that rejecting biological determinism in favor of space gas determinism isn't the slay the astrology queers think it is but if I'm being completely honest I fear that many members of our community haven't even really rejected biological determinism so much as sprinkled a layer of glitter on it

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

yes that's how confirmation bias works

[warlockofagnesi]

hang on this is way too good to leave in the comments

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

I mean. yes, I do. it's frequently necessary in the United States, where very specific religious groups keep trying to encode their specific beliefs as laws.

[dark-fire-thoughts]

I mean, astrology is VASTLY overrepresented among women and queer folks. (You know, everyone except cishet males...)

I don't think it is possible to be opposed to astrology without beeing queerphobic and misogynistic.

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

1.) I'm literally a queer woman

2.) I don't know how to tell you this but something isn't valuable or correct just because women and queer people like it

[ace-scientist]

time to repost the meme I made for every time I see someone saying that criticizing astrology is actually misogynistic

[geyfrog]

Referring to someone as your “partner” sounds as if you are deliberately obscuring their gender and may subtly out you. “My ex”, however, is entirely unobtrusively gender-neutral. #breakupallrelationships

[kragehund-est]

problematic rage gap. one partner tries to bring nuance and understanding to a tough situation. the other wants to blow up the earth about it.