Chubby Giraffe

???

[durbikins]

[setheverman]

what’s the mood for february?

[c3po]

no mood we’re taking a break from feeling anything

[so-pale-girl]

[kadzhi]

one good thing about december on this hellsite is that this gif will be making its rounds again

[tastefullyoffensive]

A late entry for best costume. (via afterthesunsets)

[drrockbell]

“Scoob, like we gotta fight the homunculi man!”

[cheese-sample-official]

tbh I’ve never had my debit card info stolen and I chalk it up to the security number on the back being 666

like if I was a criminal out stealing credit/debit card info and I saw that?

nah man I’m out

[executiveoutcomes-deactivated20]

damn an whats the numbers on the front 

[moxis]

job interview: we need HAPPY, MOTIVATED people!!

my depressed ass:

[unpretty]

i always thought of a king sized bed as being a bit bigger than a queen, but now that i have one, i can tell you that a king sized bed is an absurdity. i can sprawl out, and my husband can sprawl out, and the cat can sprawl out, and none of us are touching. i reach out in the night, and find only pillows and plush walruses. i reach further and eventually find his elbow. he rolls over the comforters to try and find me. “i have crossed oceans of bed to be with you,” he says. there is a vast expanse of bed untouched, unmapped, unexplored. the cat is still trying to sleep on my face.

[bandomfandombeyond]

This is the opposite of a creepypasta

[bimbocracy]

Men think it’s ruder for a woman to say “don’t interrupt me” than it is for them to interrupt her in the first place

[booblessgoddess]

My brother just sent me this on snapchat I can’t fucking stop laughing this is so stupid I hate him

[jedimagnus]

Why on earth hasn’t anyone invented a less terrifying way to open biscuits and cinnamon rolls???? 😩

[kayliemalinza]

because squishing that much biscuit into that little space teeters on the edge of hubris. the pop is to keep us humble. to remind us that death comes for all

[bajn]

[lugmilla]

[officialfist]

This is funnier than anything shitpostbot could ever dream of.

[meloetta]

i still can’t believe renaissance fairs are real

[meloetta]

it’s like anime expo for fans of the black plague

[zoby]

have you ever actually been to one or are you just basing this on that episode of family guy

[meloetta]

the implication that i’ve ever seen an episode of family guy in my life is worse than all the medieval insults that have been thrown at me so far

[thefeelofavideogame]

[reimuhakureivevo]

[shinzo-abe-official]

I can’t stress this enough: You need to fuck our country depends on it.

[i-am-a-fish]

like this post and I will instantly teleport to your home and gobble up your shower curtain

[arch-tempered-yian-garuga]

My shower curtain is glass

[i-am-a-fish]

well crunchity munchity then, you think that will stop me?