Cj

Into a lot of stuff, my interests change often. Leave me lone he/him, 18

[elliottitt]

every time new photos get released, it makes me wanna see the director's cut soooo badly...

[sootandspine]

[lovelessloverboy-dean]

Something about the church being a dangerous and oppressive place to naim but also constantly mirroring his journey..."will she let love into her life" being spoken by the pastor over the image of naim smiling as he walks home after his and Ryan's first kiss. His mom sharing her story saying "I found someone else in the silence" as he looks at ryan in a pew in front of him...the church as a structure hurts them and the Bible is used against them but the testimonials of actual people going to the church constantly mirror their story and their feelings for each other

[hystericalend]

What do you think is Ryan's and Naim's favorite neighborhood in Melbourne and their favorite thing to do there? <3 I just melt when I imagine their domestic future together

hey! forgive my taking a while to answer this. honestly i have no idea i haven't rlly thought abt it until now but i feel like they'd settle in a middle/outer north suburb for affordability bc realistically so much of ryan and naim's life their first few years in melbourne will be dictated by the fact they have no money and they're completely on their own. like bundoora or thomastown way?? no more than a 20 minute walk from the nearest station. once they find jobs they'll both be working their asses off just to have enough to pay rent/bills and fill the fridge, and i imagine they'd both be so exhausted from their jobs + general stress of all the other life shit that comes with being a working adult that they don't get much time to go out and do anything. ++ considering the insane trauma they've been through & fear of the entity catching them off guard probably means the most relaxing thing they can do with their leisure time is staying at home just freely enjoying one another's company without fear of disapproving looks or the entity posing a threat.

but once they're more financially settled i picture naim cutting back on his retail shifts and applying for uni. while he's there he can more comfortably dips his toes in queer social circles, and i can totally see him getting dragged to clubs lmfao. obviously he forces ryan to come along bc no way is he going there without him but once he's inside music vibrating in his teeth his inner 14 year old psytrance loving self reemerges and he lowkey has a ball. but hottake lmao i actually think ryan might actually get overwhelmed by how loud and busy it gets?? like keep in mind ryan is from fuckass nowhere and i seriously doubt he'd ever been to inner city melbourne before he and naim ran away. thursgays at yah yah's is the most people ryan has ever seen all crammed into one room in his life and tho making out with naim in public is hot af and he #wouldrecommend i don't think he'd enjoy the experience of clubbing all that much . he indulges naim's very short lived clubbing phase and they get their semi public sex kicks by doing ungodly things in the filthy bathrooms but gradually mellow out into more chill nights out. when they have money to spare the two of them enjoy lazy slow-paced nights out at a local bar. if they're going with naim's uni mates it's some fancy wine bar with couches and ambient lighting and a record player in the corner and if it's ryan's mates it's some seedy pub with a sticky bartop and a pool table in the corner. both are a fun time in different ways lol. either way i think they tend to enjoy quieter places where they can sit down and have a meal and a yarn as well as a drink yk?

idk how accurate this is to their canonical characterisations and tbh them being australian men (derogatory) casts doubt but i do love the idea of them making the effort to go on dates and do cute shit together as a couple. a hc i've nurtured for ages is them doing a photobooth together very early on in melbourne as a sort of . rewrite of ryan's trauma. faces squished together grinning with all their teeth, sweet kisses and messy hair. they print off 2 strips and each keep one folded up in their wallets. it's such a sweet memento the more years go by bc oh my god look how young we were (yet they're still just as in love as they were then)

also im projecting culture onto them here but picnics at the royal botanical gardens! movie dates at nova or the sun! perusing the ngv hand in hand! i love the idea of them really enjoying everything melbourne city has to offer but again, they're so exhausted from work most of the time a "date" is movie pulled up on naim's cheap laptop with fan working overdrive while they eat microwave blasted leftover chinese. but honestly?? after rituals and entities and all the awful shit they've come from, cuddling on the couch with a movie and leftovers is more than enough

[sootandspine]

do you think this was the real ryan or the entity? could they have run into each other during the night?

when naim sees the entity before the forest sequence, it still has blood on it from the bathroom scene. this is what i mean:

when naim runs away in the forest. the entity follows him into the mill, and then it looks like the version without the blood

the entity does not simply copy a person’s physical appearance. it reflects back the victim’s desire and perception of that person and builds a version from whatever already exists inside the person looking at it. so entity-ryan would not be an objective replica of the real ryan at the current moment, it would be naim’s mental construction of ryan

i don’t know if the bloodless ryan in the forest was necessarily the real ryan? but if it was, then seeing him would have given naim a new, updated image of what ryan currently looked like. then, when the entity appeared again, it adapted itself to match that version

[moonandstarshangoutinbars]

ryanaim high off their ass trying to figure out a way to get entity naim & entity ryan to pursue each other instead

[withdevovotion]

when naim starts training in medicine, he gets accepted into a friendly little group of coursemates his age. conversation turns to partners every now and then — naim says he’s got a boyfriend, says he’s called ryan, doesn’t say all that much else. maybe it’s a residual protective instinct leftover from his years in bandee. whatever it is, naim keeps the details on ryan pretty vague. he doesn’t think much of it: he’s always been a private person. it’s not a big deal.

his friends, though — they kind of begin to assume that maybe naim and his boyfriend aren’t going so strong. maybe it’s a complicated situation. naim is clearly withholding, but it’s his business. nobody pushes, and he doesn’t give anything more away.

one afternoon naim mentions he’s leaving a little early. appointment, he explains — needs to go get his passport redone, something mundane and routine. offhandedly says his boyfriend is giving him a lift.

3:00pm and naim interrupts himself mid-sentence, cutting off whatever he was saying about next week’s first aid module to wave at someone from across the room. leaves the biro he was writing charts with on the front desk, heads over to whoever’s waiting for him at the door — tall & blond, dusty boots, tradie.

tall & blond is smiling preemptively, strikingly comparable to a dog with a wagging tail, a couple bracelets on each wrist, looking kind of like he’s walked straight out of a magazine about surfing. he says something indiscernible that naim laughs at. his hand settles casually on naim’s side like neither of them even realise it’s there. tall & blond — ryan, that’s gotta be ryan — scoffs at something, reaches out to link him and naim’s fingers.

watching them is like — staring into the sun. magnet and metal. they’re about to harness the power of osmosis and fucking fuse any second now.

naim heads back over to grab his bag. "that's ryan?" one of his friends blurts, and naim looks like a deer in headlights.

"yeah," he says, hackles clearly up, defensive on instinct. his brown eyes are big. skeptical. maybe suspicious.

and then someone says, "kind of assumed you guys were going through a rocky patch," and naim looks surprised.

"nah," he says, like he needs to clarify. like the evidence of just how well him and ryan get along hadn't been excessively and obviously shining at everyone from across the lobby just a couple moments ago. like ryan’s eyes aren’t still focused on him. and then, "how come?”

"you never talk about him much."

naim shrugs. he toes the lino floor like he's guilty, or maybe not sure what to do with the attention. "didn't think anyone’d wanna know."

a slightly bemused expression. “you can talk about whatever you want, mate.”

maybe that's all he needed, who knew? he gets to work the next morning & from then on ryan’s nearly all he talks about. he looks happy about it.

[clippedtoned]

the concept of naim and ryan actually communicating their feelings and being fully honest with one another but it’s only to the other’s entity counterpart makes me so sickkkkk. the screen door scene stays on my mind because wdym naim verbally opens up about his fears and feelings that led to him outing ryan and hunter, and he’s saying it to ryan’s face but not to the real ryan, not to his ryan. just imagine how that conversation would’ve gone if it were between naim and actual ryan; if naim had the chance to explain himself, if ryan had the opportunity to understand the why and naim’s honest perspective which could coat the whole situation with a bit of understanding instead of his initial anger. and maybe it’s easier to spill his guts because naim knows the ryan on the other side of his door isn’t the real one, but regardless it kills me how the most important conversations are held with the fake versions of the other ☹️

[meowriimo]

this particular bratlin moment has been living in my head rent free since yesterday. "that's not what i said. that's what he interpreted 💅🏼" okay miss diva girl!!

[hystericalend]

thinking about how the highly coveted "leviticus but from ryan's pov" is lowkey ryan just going through the horrors of Does My Situationship Like Me Back. like it gets hidden under his macho demeanour + how forward he is initiating kissing & sex but ryan is so clearly insecure that naim's feelings aren't returned (at least with the same intensity) for basically the entire run time of the film. we don't get to see how long he's been crushing before their first kiss at the mill, but we hear through their conversation afterwards that it's ryan that intiated bringing naim there, which makes me suspect ryan maybe had his eye on naim for a while..

like . ryan is palming naim through his jeans all of 2 seconds after their first kiss unabashedly eager, but then naim catches their reflection, panics and pulls away, and ryan is left painfully confused. bc naim was very into it at first (whimpering and moaning into ryan's mouth just from a kiss levels of into it), and even though he stopped before they went further he wasnt mad because they were bantering afterwards?? ryan knows naim is definitely attracted to him at least, but does he like him back?

so he brings naim to the mill the second time, lights a joint to loosen him up, and asks him in the bravest way he can manage. so there's nothing you like about this place? and though it leads into another kiss (and maybe more that we didn't get to see), naim kind of never properly answers the question. in fact, his playful avoidance could've even thrown ryan off further. nah, he says. nothing. clearly from the way naim leans in and kisses him again he's full of shit, but does he just like what they're doing because ryan is a boy? or because it's ryan?

a lot of people take ryan hooking up with hunter as a marker of ryan not caring for naim or placing little value on their relationship but i think it's actually the total opposite. to me, ryan is the one thinking he's placing way too much value on his budding relationship with naim and he's horrifically insecure bc he believes naim isn't doing the same. though we as the audience experience this from naim's pov and thus our knee-jerk reaction is to interpret it as naim does—ryan "cheating" on him and therefore not being serious abt him—im growing more convinced that from ryan's pov, he feels that naim is the one just having fun. again this is only my interpretation but i feel like there's SO much that points to ryan yearning so fucking hard and feeling like naim does not return his feelings with the same intensity. but since he's too caught up in his masculine performance and the Being A Teenager of it all he refuses to be vulnerable and just ask. So he's left feeling lost about whether or not the intensity of his feelings are returned. ++ the fact that what he has with naim is so different than what he's ever had with anyone before—a gentle and tender intimacy he never believed he was deserving of, he's extra terrified of it being one sided, because where would that leave him? what if for naim, ryan is just fun fooling around? what if by asking for more ryan scares him off? so when hunter, violently familiar, comes knocking and wants to pick up where they left off, of course he lets it happen.

then the ritual. ryan locking eyes with naim as he's twitching vomiting choking on the floor only to later encounter entity naim without knowing it's entity naim and quietly accepting naim's sudden uncharacteristic violence bc if means he can still have even a shadow of the tenderness they had before then he'd let naim do whatever he wanted to him. but forgive me i cannot sink my teeth into all of That right now or this post will be a million fucking words so allow me to jump to post jessica convo. they're in the bus digesting the fact that they'll probably have to deal with this thing for the rest of their lives. ryan is listening to naim immediately jump to well, guess ill leave town, and ryan is trying and failing not to let that cut deep bc how can naim be so quick to drop everything and leave bandee behind? so quick to wipe his hands clean of this town and everything in it, of him? ryan can't help it. "don't go" he says, feeling naim slipping through his fingers, mortified by how that is what terrifies him more than anything else. but then naim responds: "i hate that shit hole anyway". and obviously he's not trying to be unkind but how is that supposed to make ryan feel?? how is he not supposed to take that as him not meaning as much to naim as naim does to him?

even with the confirmation that naim's entity looking like him which means his feelings are a least slightly returned, ryan can't help but feel hurt and a little bitter that naim is so quickly scared away from what they have. he doesn't fault him for this of course, but how else is he supposed to feel when even though naim clearly feels something for him, he's not willing to fight for it? because ryan likes naim so fucking much!! he's just learnt that this thing following him might never leave him be, that for the rest of his life he will be on guard, but the craziest thing about all of it is that he doesn't fucking care!! all he wants is for naim to stay by his side and like him back. he gets a bit of relief through naim responding to his advances on the bus and obviously enjoying it, but then later, when ryan cheekily invites him into the bathroom, he doesn't realise until the blood is pouring down his neck that the kiss he'd just received was a lie and naim let his fear get in the way again.

the iconic "i don't want it to look like some other dickhead, i want it to look like you." is ryan's final desperate plea. this is him finally laying it all out, and taking the leap. and god what a scene!!! the fact he bitterly stormed off after naim tells him he's given up and is planning to leave, but turns back around bc he can't let him go. that even though naim is turned away he can't bring himself to look at his back, keeps his eyes on the ground, hands in his pockets, voice pitched high and on the verge of breaking. for ryan this isn't just about being openly gay, it's about being with naim. i like you, ryan is telling him. if i have to live with this thing, i wouldn't want it to have the face of anybody else. if i have to live with the oppression and hate that come being who i am, i want to do it with you, naim. you and no one else.

then all the shit with izzy happens, and ryan learns the truth. and of course it hurts, of course he's angry. but if anything, he's more angry at himself because he still fucking loves him! he stops the car, waits for naim to climb in and drives him all the way home. and the entire time his eyes stay firmly on the road because he can hear naim's tears and knows if he sees them then he'll break. it won't be me. it'll never be me. he says as his last words. a promise to himself as much as it is to naim, because maybe naim was right. maybe they're only making things worse.

but then the entity comes, and the second he sees naim's sweet face and big wet eyes begging for his forgiveness, ryan folds. and he knows he's being tricked even as it's happening, but that's the point of all this isn't it? to be lured in by somebody you can't refuse? he knows it's not really him before the touch turns violent, but ryan whelan is a moth, and naim reid is the brightest, most beautiful flame.

he makes it through the night by some miracle, bloody, bruised and hollow. his eyes fix on the horizon in a thousand-yard stare, unable to burn away the image of naim's throat splitting under his folding knife, blood spilling over his fingers like water. it'd grinned at him as his knife hit bone, metal grinding against vertebrae. more blood bubbled over naim's lips, bared teeth stained with red as it laughed up at him, the sound wet and horrific. at some point it stopped trying to kill him, knowing that the worst it could do had already been done, naim's eyes going colourless as ryan pulled the knife free and staggered away covered in blood that nobody else could see.

he doesn't remember packing the bag. doesn't remember walking to the bus stop. his phone rings but he doesn't answer. he doesn't do anything but keep his eyes on the gravel and wait for the bus that will take him away from this place and the invisible blood on this hands.

and then a familiar face, one he saw cry and bleed and die the night before. he should run, but he's frozen, entranced by him just like he was the first time naim reid walked into year 11 maths what feels like years ago.

please tell me its really you. and people sidle off the bus and pass between them, angling their bodies away from naim so they don't collide. naim nods, eyes shining with tears, and ryan knows then, that what he feared wasn't returned is felt by naim ten fold.

[himbomarleau]

There's a fake dick pic that's floating around the internet that's supposedly Ilya's and the Raiders are all laughing and passing the phone around. They ask Ilya if it's real and he says "Ask your mom". Marleau leans over to take a peak and says "That's not Roz's. His is bigger"

They high five.

[wedonotsowa03]

I’ve been dying for a story about Tradie Ryan and Nurse Aide Naim set way into the future. And I wanted to talk to ya’ll about it. Personally, my headcanon about the Entity is that it was built on their fear and suppressed truths, so once they both wholeheartedly accepted who they are and embraced each other, the “curse” was completely broken. The Entity is practically a non-issue now (or at the absolute most, just a faint memory). What’s left is just softness of their real lives.

Y’know how their typical day would start in the softest way possible, with Ryan acting as a weighted blanket in the early morning. Warm and completely unbothered by alarms, he’d have Naim pinned to the mattress with his head buried deep into the crook of Naim’s neck. Naim would just smile, running his fingers through Ryan’s messy hair and peppering the top of his head with gentle kisses. But getting out of bed would be an ordeal in itself. Every time Naim tries to peel Ryan’s heavy limbs off him to take a shower, he’d just grunts a sleepy “five more minutes,” while trailing warm, lazy kisses along Naim’s neck and collarbone. It leads to this adorable back-and-forth where Naim is laughing and trying to convince him that they’re both going to be late for their shifts, while Ryan stubbornly refuses to let go.

ALSO.. Imagine: Naim bustling around the clinic, when the doors open and Ryan struts in straight off the job site. He’s still in his dusty work boots and hi-vis vest, carrying the lunch Naim accidentally forgot on the kitchen counter. Ryan gives him a casual, fond kiss right there in the lobby (We have come so far!) before heading back to his truck, completely unbothered by the scene he’s just made. The second the doors close behind him, Naim gets instantly ambushed by his fellow nurse aides. They’d be leaning over the reception desk, wiggling their eyebrows and teasing him relentlessly about his broad-shouldered tradie boyfriend, boldly declaring that Naim is clearly “getting it good.”

Absolutely amazing head cannon, Anon.

I differ on the perspective of the entity going away completely now that they accept one another and share freely in their love, BUT that is because :

1. I am an avid horror lover and the concept is just so juicy, it’s the perfect combination of survival and psychological horror to me

2. Despite accepting themselves, I see the entity as also the amalgamation of society’s homophobia and bias, of which the entity feeds off of it and wants them to stay afraid.

In my AU (linked in bio) Ryan is a tradie already, Naim (in my work in writing right now) is in uni, and I would love to write to your suggestions of a slow, peaceful morning and Ryan dropping him off with an audience. Love the “you’re so lucky” trope, it’s delicious.

Thanks for the message, anon ❤️

[thatoneautisticshark]

Marlelau gets the nickname Big red because well... Clifford. And no one really thinks twice about it, until Russian rookie Ilya is highly confused by this nickname. They show him Clifford the big red dog.

But after this, the name starts to change, just sometimes, in the way nicknames will. Red dog. Big dog. And eventually somehow it lands on Pup, or puppy and doesn't change to much from there.

At some point some poor person is interviewing someone on the team and is like "That was a good okay from Marleau, wasn't it?"

"Oh yeah, great shot from Pup."

Marleau interacting with fans and Ilya is like "Puppy!" And his head snaps up instantly because that is his name.

The internet thinks the Raiders are in some team wide puppy play kink shit.

[clippedtoned]

firm believer that around the same naim was opening up about his fear that led to him outing ryan and hunter to entity ryan through the screen door the real ryan was accepting entity naim’s apology

[buckleydelucakinard]

my 2¢ on cliff marleau's nickname being "red" for clifford. his name is actually heathcliffe but he's really struggling between correcting his teammates and successfully no longer being nicknamed after the big red dog OR leaving it be bc if he tells them his real name, there's a chance the teasing will actually be worse. he knows its all in good fun but good god the debate takes up a good chunk of space in his brain. side note: when luca finds out his full name his heathcliffe he melts and cliff is no longer embarassed by his full name

[buckleydelucakinard]

cliff and luca exchanging calf muscle massages that border on painful just bc when the calf muscles are sore, they're so fuckin sensitive to any touch let alone purposeful hard touches

the guys hear moans coming from luca's hotel one night after a boston game and they're all teasing him until luca gives one of the guys a calf massage and hes like "oh oh fuck I fuckin get it shit hurts but damn my leg feels better"

[gnawu]

cut the cameras