"codify" is such a fun word. lawmakers! turn this into a fish

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@clarissehadwalkedhere
"codify" is such a fun word. lawmakers! turn this into a fish
Thats a potion whose effect is “teleport straight to hospital”
when I was a kid I went camping and the adults at the big campsite went around and gave all the kids glowsticks and necklaces to wear at night (kids loved it, and adults knew where the kids were because none of them wanted to lose their prettyshiny)
Mine went straight in my mouth because it had a delightful plasticy feeling with a slight crunch if you really went for it. I chewed on that thing for ages. Until at some point I accidentally actually bit into it and it popper and I got glowstick all up in my mouth and down my shirt and it was horrible. One of (but not the worst) things I have ever had the misfortune of tasting. And I knew it had to be poison because it was probably radioactive goo or something and I was gonna die and my parents and everyone would know I died because I ate a glowstick and did something stupid
So I spat it out and washed my mouth really good with water and then wandered into the woods crying to die alone after everyone was asleep because I was clearly going to die from the poison and at least this way they might think I died getting eaten by animals or taken by ghosts or maybe they'd be happy because they never found my tiny child corpse and would assume I'd gone on to live a cool life amongst the trees.
Except at some point my parents woke up and everyone freaked out about a missing child in the woods and me being smart stuck to the trails so I was easy to find with my stupid glowing shirt and my glowing face and my bucket hat 2 or 3 miles down the path.
I told my parents I was worried people might think I was a stupid kid who died doing something stupid by eating a glow stick so instead I decided to run away into the woods forever or die and then nobody would think I was stupid. My folks listened carefully and then told me that was stupid.
GOOD LUCK, BABE! Chappell Roan at Coachella 2024
CHAPPELL ROAN Coachella — April 12, 2024
This. Is my pride and joy. A gift for my dad, who played Zork with me when I was a kid, and with his dad when he was a kid. I designed this pattern myself and had a great time puzzling out how to hide the glow in the dark letters!
Pattern: “West of House” by me Fabric: 2x1 on 18ct Blue-Grey Aida Started: 11/27/2021 Finished: 12/25/2021
Sure you're "child free" now. But in 20 years when your riches are vast and you rule with an iron fist you're gonna feel real fucking embarrassed when you're ready to be usurped and the only guy scheming enough to poison your wine Is a weird cousin with vague familial connections instead of your flesh and blood idiot son that wants the throne a few years sooner
i guarantee you i will not be usurped by some cousin, i will have personally selected and groomed my murderer for success like a roman emperor
rip to all the “fuckyeah___” blogs that carried our society at one point </3
Absolutely bonkers that I'm now one of those weirdos you hear about on Twitter
I committed to the bit so hard that I also committed misdemeanor impersonation of a government official
nothing fills my heart with more violence than the sight of a naked wrapping paper roll
this is how Cain killed Abel
reblog to bonk the person you reblogged it from on the head
how does it feel to be the funniest person on earth
if you think about it it's only fair that Character With No Canon Physical Description is declared sexiest man by popular vote. on the Critically Acclaimed Movie That Doesn't Fucking Exist website
let go
Shout out to the day i killed the queen via AO3, legendary (name of the fanfic is jigens sick adventure, yes it is a sickfic)
links within this thread:
https://t.co/87kYpZ4LJr
http://credo.library.umass.edu/view/full/mums312-b015-i208
https://t.co/FpxrGYd5dJ
https://www.pri.org/stories/2017-03-17/curious-origins-irish-slaves-myth
https://www.csmonitor.com/USA/Society/2018/0316/No-the-Irish-were-not-slaves-in-the-Americas
https://medium.com/@Limerick1914/the-imagery-of-the-irish-slaves-myth-dissected-143e70aa6e74#.xhxaucbu2
https://www.nytimes.com/2015/12/06/magazine/white-debt.html
in addition to this great thread, i recommend reading “how the irish became white” by noel ignatiev. i do expect a lot of fighting against these facts because these lies and myth are so ingrained and now have become a part of the community and the sense of self and pride of irish people.
Happy St Patrick’s Day
I’ve been waiting all year to post this.