Clicker, she/her approaching mid 20s. This is my blog for writing whump. @myhusbandsasemni is my main blog where I put updates for the novels I'm working to publish. I also do whump art. Commissions are open. See Pinned post for my stories, schedule for posting, and commissions information.
About Me and my Writing
Asks about me, my writing, or requests for whump scenarios and snippets are fully welcome and encouraged!
Crestlen Universe - ONGOING
The governments of three modern city states finally came to an agreement that they should combine their cities into one. Crestlen. A wild west of super powered villain and vigilantes, heroes tied up in yards of red tape and contradictory laws, and greedy, corrupt corporations.
With villains killing hamstrung heroes, corporations building new forms of slavery and standing armies, and vigilantes and gangs working together to keep the city from falling apart, there are many, many opportunities for people to get lost through the cracks and whumped to within an inch of their lives.
Completed Long Stories
* From Dust to Ashes - Vampires getting whumped in the modern era.
* Clove - Child werewolf whumpee, cottage core vampire caretaker
Thought Projects
* Kindled Scales - Fae politics and manipulation. Childhood friend betrayal. World created with @percy-frayer
* The Adventurers - Inter dimensional heroes have very dangerous jobs
One Shots
Picture this as a bin of randomly assorted whump snippets.
Challenges
The collections of whump works I complete for challenges. (Typically Adventurers content)
Abandoned or on Hiatus
Sometimes you start stuff and then don’t finish. Still, I don’t believe in throwing writing or art away, so I am saving these here in case I come back to them. You have been warned, though.
Bookshelf
The collection of stories I have found on Tumblr that I have read/am reading. This is really just a page for me to bookmark the things I’m reading so I don’t forget about them
Crestlen update since it is Sunday! So, I have been putting off writing more because I have been cleaning up my notes. I do eventually want to be able to write stories that happened at random points in the past, which means my notes need to be carefully dated and organized so I can see who exactly was around and active at certain times. As well as which groups and corporations had been created at that point in the timeline. My memory is truly atrocious due to my AuDHD, so I have to do a lot of extra work to make sure that I don't forget important things and accidentally create gaping plot holes. This means a lot of work that I don't really want to do, lol, so it's been slow going. But, I am getting very close to being done and dusted with this. I'm hoping to get back to writing week after this one and then we can see how the Dragon Gang handles this section of the Resource Program and what happens with Cedar and Beater.
Thank you to everyone who has read my stories and for those of you being patient while I get this finished up.
Summary: A vigilante finds out that a hero team is keeping a low level villain with shrinking abilities as their torture toy. He decides to try to find a way to get the villain out, even if he has to put himself in danger.
Summary: A Resource sniper gets caught in the crossfire between the infamous Dragon Gang and a cruel hero team. It seems someone might be on his side, though.
Part 1 - I’m having a hard enough time as it is
Part 2 - A dumpster fire of a day
Part 3 - Well, can’t say I expected this
Summary: Ivan's friend and boss was taken by an unknown entity, forcing Ivan to take on a new identity and go undercover looking for Kolt. When he finds him, Kolt is in rough shape and the escape isn't as clean as either of them could have hoped for. Now, with Kolt free, and Ivan captured, Kolt can only try to recover in time to rescue his friend and keep him from being turned into a living weapon in his place.
The tech room wasn't really big enough for everyone, but they kept shoving themselves in there anyway.
Terry and Bret were in their chairs, while Penelope, Gale, and Kolt made do with the tiny couch along the wall.
Penelope had given up the couch as she sat in the walkway, using Kolt's legs as a backrest as Gale and Kolt leaned in over Kolt's phone, giggling like children over some video Kolt had found in one of his old storage drives.
Penelope was supposed to be getting ready to help with the tear down of the training facility that had been discovered, but she found herself hiding out with her friends for a bit, just relaxing.
There had been a lot of things on her mind lately. Without the ongoing situation with Gale keeping her busy and with Kolt pretty much entirely up on his feet and independent emotionally and physically again, she was left with nothing to distract herself from where she came from and what she was. It was a lot to consider.
She should just take on the new task Phoenix had offered her and use that as a distraction but...
Well, she didn't think she could put this off anymore.
Bret and Terry were chatting to one another about a new firewall the government had installed after their last one had been torn to shreds by independent hackers, and were trying to decide if they would get in trouble for having a go at it themselves. It seemed like she wasn't the only one distracted from their task.
"Penny? You alright?" Kolt asked, twitching his leg against her back.
"Yeah," she said, tilting her head back to smile at him.
He smiled and nodded, but she knew that he was telling her to talk to him when she was ready.
She looked ahead again, slowly sinking into her feeds and pulling up her research threads again.
The Ruby Coalition was simply dust in the wind, now. Phoenix had made sure of that. The guards had been scattered and rehired where they wanted to apply, the higher level technicians were snapped up by villains and whoever else wanted skilled hands hiding their work. The manor had been leveled and the underground tunnels filled in.
Her mother's body had been cremated and disposed of without a memorial or burial.
No, not her mother. Maybe her mother? Penelope was glad the woman was gone and that she couldn't hold Penelope's leash anymore. But then there were those nagging memories of the days where Gigi would carefully ask Penelope's opinions on the bodies she was commissioning from Harry and Co Labs. Getting things exactly right where they could and apologizing when the labs replied that they couldn't make certain changes.
Penelope remembered that first night when she woke up. Gigi was there and she was smiling, tears running down her cheeks as she stroked Penelope's forehead, smoothing back her artificial hair.
"Welcome back, my dear," she had whispered. "However much of you there is left. I love you."
Penelope clenched her hand in her sweatpants. She hated remembering the good moments. The times where she could almost convince herself that Gigi did love her. It was.... hard.
Penelope turned her attention to a topic that wasn't so difficult. Pier. He had not gotten out of this unscathed. He had been found unconscious in the aftermath and was currently in a holding cell as people worked out what he had and hadn't done. They wanted to try him for as many of Gigi's crimes as they could manage.
Penelope huffed. He didn't really deserve as much as they were trying to heap on his head, but she would be glad to see the annoying young man tucked away where money couldn't get him out. She really disliked him. The way he looked at her, like she couldn't really understand him. Like she was just a computer program who, for some reason, wouldn't follow his every instruction, always really got to her despite how often Gigi assured her that Penelope was just reading the situation wrong or that he should just be ignored where possible.
She took some comfort in the fact that since the Ruby Coalition had fallen, he wouldn't have access to any of the funds to bail him out. He would be sitting in prison for a long time.
She put that thought away. Maybe not forever. She would love the chance to get to say some things to him that Gigi never would have allowed her to, but Penelope doubted she would ever actually go through with that. Maybe sending an anonymous message would be enough. She wasn't sure.
Penelope turned her thoughts back to Gigi, hoping that this time she could untangle the emotions there and put it to rest. Though if she still felt so strongly about Pier, she doubted she would be able to change anything about the way she felt about Gigi.
Gigi had been her mother in a sense. She had helped Penelope relearn how to walk, had given her a name when she realized she didn't have one or just couldn't remember it. She built a room for Penelope and gave her everything she could have asked for.
Except, perhaps, freedom.
Penelope had asked once.
"Am I supposed to be here forever?"
Gigi had looked up from the notes she had been making on her computer and gave her a tight smile. "Maybe not forever. But you're not ready yet, sweetheart."
"When will I be ready? When will you tell me where my body is?"
Gigi sighed. "That is hard to know, dear. Please be patient with an old woman. When the time comes it will be a difficult conversation for us both."
They would never have that conversation. Penelope would never know what Gigi wanted to tell her. What would have been hard for the old woman to explain. Penelope didn't even know who her body used to be before she existed in this form. Was that person a good person? Someone tormented by Gigi before being used in an experiment? Someone Gigi loved?
It had to have been someone she loved in some way or another.
Penelope might never know because she may never find that body. She may never find any messages Gigi left behind if she did leave anything behind, because Penelope had practically cosigned the woman's death. There was no more information to be had. Just ashes on the breeze somewhere. Or in the ocean. Or more likely in the trash. Penelope didn't know what the government did with the ashes of villains. She doubted that they were sent to family members. Not that Pier would probably want them. He'd felt just as suffocated under Gigi as Penelope did despite how little he had hanging over his head to keep him there.
It was all just so unfair.
Penelope missed her.
She put her arms around herself, wishing she could swallow with a throat she could not remember. She missed that horrible woman who kept her around under a heavily veiled threat about what might happen to what remained of her body if she didn't do as she was told. And she missed that woman!?
She felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned her head to look at Kolt as Gale watched her curiously. Perhaps a little nervously.
She was grinding her fake teeth. It was horrible sound. And it was probably ruining the paint job.
"Sorry," she murmured out of a fake throat. She felt so unreal at the moment.
Kolt leaned toward her, putting an arm around her shoulders in an awkward hug. "You're alright. What do you need?"
"I need.... I need everything to make sense. I need my body back. I need these feelings to go away," she said, shaking her head.
Kolt thought for a moment. "We'll get your body back. I'll start calling some old allies and see what I can't hear about what Gigi was up to when they were putting you together. After the trainee facility is dealt with we will go find it."
Penelope sighed a soft breath. "What if it's not enough?"
"You have us," Bret said. He'd come to sit next to her on the floor and put a hand on hers. "It's okay."
Penelope slowly nodded, taking another deep breath. She was glad she asked for that function to be added, even if it was unnecessary. It helped alleviate her emotions better than she could have even imagined.
"I think I just need a distraction," she said. She had been silly to think that sending herself into another spiral about all of this was going to fix the emotional mess Gigi had created to stand in her place now that she was dead.
"Alright, uh," Kolt said, thinking, and Bret got his mouth open to ask something, but Gale beat them to it.
"Dr. LeAnne," she said in a voice that shook with something like grief. He sounded exactly the way that Penelope felt. "What happened to her?"
Penelope actually knew that off the top of her head.
"They moved her before we got there," she said. "She was being sent out to be killed. I don't think they were ever going to tell you and hope that you just kept obeying them despite her being gone."
Gale shuddered and there was something deeply conflicted in his eyes. "Is she dead?"
"No. She was shot in the head, but they hadn't finished her off properly. She's in the hospital in a coma. I don't think she's ever supposed to wake up, though. There was a lot of damage."
Gale licked his lips, his eyes wet. He was clearly trying very hard not to cry. "Right," he whispered.
"Do... you wants us to send someone to, I don't know, deal with her?" Terry asked as she scooted his rolling chair closer to the group.
"No!"
The answer burst out of Gale and he looked just as surprised by it as they felt. "No," he murmured. "She can just... stay there."
"Gale, if she wakes up-" Kolt started, but Gale shook his head.
"I'm not in a place where I can... where I can think about her. Not safely. Not yet."
Kolt nodded and patted his friend's shoulder. "Alright, man. We will wait for you, then."
Gale nodded, relieved as he leaned back.
Penelope found herself speaking before she knew what was happening. "I know how you feel."
He looked at her, confusion and skepticism in his eyes,
"I know what it's like to love and hate someone so much... like that," she murmured.
Understanding dawned on Gale's face, in those beautiful micro expressions Penelope would never have again.
He gave her a weak smile before looking away.
She looked between her friends. Bret, Kolt, Terry, and Gale, and she let herself believe that it would be alright. That these guys would have her back.
"I had better go help get things ready," she said. "I've been procrastinating."
"Ugh, us too," Bret said, rolling his eyes.
"Not us," Kolt said smugly, because of course. His part in all of this was to monitor as much as he could through Beater and try not to be a distraction to the hallucination. His job was mainly helping Gale, at the moment, the two were clearly very satisfied with that.
"Enjoy the free time for me," Penelope said, getting to her feet. She headed for the door and paused there, looking back. "Thanks, guys."
"Of course," Bret said as the others nodded, not a lick of embarrassment in any of their expressions.
Penelope turned and went to find Phoenix and Lynx. There was work to do.
The End
A.N. - AHHHHH HERE WE ARE!!! Guys, this is actually insane to me. We made it to the end. Well, for now. I hope you liked it and I think you guys for reading. Eldest Daughter and Sunrise Lemon Bar especially. I cannot express how much I love you two!!
My next story is going to a short story about dealing with that trainee facility focusing on Beater and Cedar with a side focus on Phoenix and Lynx. I'm very excited! I will take you guys in that first chapter and you will be able to let me know if you would like to be in that tag list or not. I'm hoping to make more art for these stories as I go forward, so there will be that to look forward to.
But, I might take a week or two off. My notes need to be worked out and I need to build a plan for this next story so I don't just fling myself wildly into the void like I did with this story. That can be fun, but it can also be very annoying at times. I doubt I will make y'all wait too long before I get the next one started though. I'm extremely excited for all of it!
Again, thank you so much for reading. It means the world to me! Leave me a comment if you are so inclined and let me know what you thought/what you are excited to see next. I am highly suggestible, I will admit. :3
Summary: Ivan's friend and boss was taken by an unknown entity, forcing Ivan to take on a new identity and go undercover looking for Kolt. When he finds him, Kolt is in rough shape and the escape isn't as clean as either of them could have hoped for. Now, with Kolt free, and Ivan captured, Kolt can only try to recover in time to rescue his friend and keep him from being turned into a living weapon in his place.
Fallen Masterlist - Part 54
Content: implied 'legal' slavery, living weapons, mentioned past abuse, closeted trans character because of current dangerous situation
Kolt dreamed that night. He dreamed that he was angrier. No, this was his anger. He simply was his anger and his cunning.
He could feel something else in the back of his mind. Gambler, he thought. He frowned, but his face did not follow suite.
That was when he realized that he was dreaming of Beater. Kolt had to be careful not to wake up as he looked around. Beater was standing in a line, wearing something other than his tank top and cargo pants. The cargo pants were there, but they were a different color, and he was wearing some sort of uniform t-shirt. The short sleeves were rolled up a little so the sun still hit the outer part of his shoulders.
He was looking straight ahead at a blank wall. Kolt took a step to the side so he could see around Beater better, though he felt oddly like a passing breeze as he did so.
The other people in the line were dressed in the same loose t-shirt and cargo pants. All of them had a scar just behind and above their ears.
Resources. They were Resources.
What was Beater doing here?
Beater must have noticed Kolt was there. He didn't speak so much as mentally nudge Kolt, warning him to be quiet and careful.
Kolt nudged back in what he hoped was a friendly way as he went back to staring down the line.
Most everyone's shirts dipped low enough that he could see the identification numbers tattooed on their collarbones. There wasn't much life behind anyone's eyes.
A man, a Resource manager, appeared and Kolt turned his attention to him. He had cropped black hair and was rather on the shorter side, but there was something in his almond shaped eyes that warned Kolt he was much more dangerous than he first appeared.
Beater twitched with the urge to pound his face in, but valiantly resisted.
What is going on? Kolt asked as gently as possible.
He didn't get an answer. Beater was so distant now. Kolt didn't know if it was because of the physical distance, the effort not to fight the Resource manager, or something else. Something undefinable.
Kolt had to admit that Beater felt a lot more solid than he had originally.
"Your orders have changed. It seems the contractor fell through."
Someone raised their hand and the manager nodded.
"Were they destroyed, sir?" someone asked. It wasn't someone asking out of curiosity. They were gathering information. Strictly keeping themselves and everyone else up to date on the situation in case any little clue let them know something dangerous was afoot.
"Yes," the manager said. "They were. Harry and Co Labs were eradicated over the past few weeks by the Dragon gang and the EVU. We will not be working with either group from here on out."
The silence afterwards was oppressive. Everyone was waiting to hear what their next orders would be. Kolt took a moment to study Beater again and was surprised to realize there was a tattoo on his collarbone. Kolt wondered if Beater managed to change his form to take the tattoo, or if he had allowed someone to ink that into his skin. How would that even work? Beater wasn't technically real.
"We are working out a contract with their parent company. Founder's Solutions."
Kolt felt his heart drop in his chest. That was the company that Gale had been working at to try and find Kolt. The one who had sold Gale to Harry and Co Labs when he had tried to get Kolt out of there.
There was another part of him that was delighted he would be able to bring that information to Phoenix and Lynx, however, and Beater seemed just as pleased.
"Until that contract has been signed, you lot will stay here and work on training some of the newbies," the manager continued.
We're at one of the training facilities!?
The response he got from Beater was one of pure delight. He pushed something at Kolt and Kolt grasped onto it as best he could.
And then he knew where they were. He knew where the facilities were. He could send people to come help!
Kolt and Beater shared their delight back and forth for a moment as the manager finished giving instructions. When he was done, he left the yard, giving the Resources some yard time before they went to dinner and then went to bed.
It wasn't much of a yard time, seeing as the sun had almost crossed the horizon and it would be better to just go inside, but most of the Resources mingled, talking softly to one another with something like relief in their eyes. How often were they allowed to socialize like this? It looked like it couldn't be too often as every single one of them made the most of it, even the ones who looked like they weren't the type to just want to talk to others.
Beater made his way over to a group of three. The biggest cats in the yard.
"Cedar," he said, and Kolt would have stumbled if he had feet at the moment. He had talked to Waylon and Depletion. He knew about Cedar. He knew that this was Depletion’s lost sister.
Beater seemed surprised by that information as it took him a moment to continue speaking, but Cedar didn't seem to mind, picking up the conversation in the pause.
"You're the new kid on the block, huh?" Cedar said, making her voice rougher and huskier. She looked perfectly at ease, layered in perfectly usable muscle and sporting a five o'clock shadow. Kolt wondered how much of it was for show.
"Guess so."
"Have a name besides the designation?"
"Beater."
Cedar snorted. "Very tough. Have you actually proven it?"
There was a flash of annoyance that was directed at Kolt. Kolt apologized quietly. There just hadn't been a real time or a place for Beater to fight anyone beside Kolt himself or during sparring matches.
"In a way," Beater replied with a half shrug. "I was hoping I could kick around with your group during breaks while I'm here."
She eyed him for a long moment. She glanced at the other two, who sized him up. They all seemed to make their decision at the same time.
"Yeah, alright," Cedar said. "That works for me, I guess. This is Toby and this is Nova."
He inclined his head to them with a small smile. "Alright, then."
Kolt was curious what they were planning on doing now, but Beater kicked him out in that next breath, sending him far away to his real body.
Kolt sat up, gasping and panting for a moment before he scrambled up, groaning softly at his stiff joints.
It took him a moment to find his glasses and shoes, but after that he was on his way down the halls, reaching out for Watcher to figure out where Phoenix and Lynx were.
Watcher, who had figured out how to utilize camera networks to watch even more people, let him know that they were in bed.
Kolt hesitated. He didn't really want to wake them up. They barely got any sleep as it was running the place.
Could it wait?
No, Phoenix would strangle him in the morning if he waited.
He worked his way through the levels of security to get to Phoenix's room, stopping in front of the guards who were in charge of the final hall.
"I have important information about the location of a Resource training ground," Kolt said.
The two shared a look, confirmed his ID, and let him through.
Kolt knocked on Phoenix's door and waited impatiently, shifting his weight back and forth.
The door opened and Phoenix peered out at him.
"Kolt?"
"I know where Beater has been. Somehow he's slipped into the Resource Program and he's pretending to be a Resource. He's at one of the training grounds."
Phoenix's hand darted out from the darkness, the same skin tone as Gale for the moment, and he bodily dragged Kolt in by the front of his shirt.
Soon, they had a map open and Kolt was marking where exactly the trainees were being held. It was out in the middle of nowhere between Crestlen and the closest city state. There weren't even fields out there since the terrain was too rocky to grow anything on.
"The Resource Program doesn't even own any land up there," Phoenix mused. "I wonder who owns that bit and how aware they are of what is going on... were the trainees alright?"
"I didn't see any. Just the graduated Resources," Kolt said. "I did see Depletion's sister, though. She looked alright, mostly. I mean, obviously she's not transitioned, but she wasn't physically injured and she seems to be doing alright for herself in there for now."
Phoenix narrowed his eyes and nodded. "Thank you for bringing this to my attention, Kolt. Did you tell Beater to do this?"
"No, he did this on his own. Last I saw him was in Harry and Co Labs."
"Did he explain why he did it?"
"Not really. I think he was getting bored of me. And maybe... maybe he found something in the labs. He felt very separate from me somehow."
"You think he's becoming his own person?" Phoenix asked.
Kolt shrugged. "Maybe. I wouldn't put it past him. And we still don't actually know what the hallucinations are, so-"
"I'll have to find a scientist who could find out," Phoenix mused. "Is there anything else?"
"I don't think so. I just saw the Resources and their manager."
"What did the manager look like?"
Kolt described the man as best he could from memory and Phoenix's expression darkened.
"Orin Matthews. He's always around here somewhere, isn't he," Phoenix growled.
"That was the manager in charge of Lynx at one point, right?" Kolt asked.
Phoenix nodded. "That he was... I have a lot to think about and plan."
"I'm sorry for waking you."
"No, I'm glad you did," Phoenix said, putting a hand on Kolt's shoulder. "Thank you. And thank Beater, if you can. This is everything."
Kolt nodded and, after glanced at the location marked on the map one more time, turned and made his way out of the room.
He walked quietly down halls, sensing Watcher as the hallucination joined him. He became visible, pulling up his hoodie and tugging slightly on the strings.
"Do you know what's going on?" Kolt asked.
Watcher shrugged. "Not really. I know Beater did find something in the labs, but I was trying to make sure the way was clear for you and Gale to make it out safely."
"Which I do appreciate. Thank you."
Watcher smiled slightly and nodded.
They were quiet for a moment before Kolt said, "You guys are so strange. I can't tell if you are your own people, or just parts of myself."
"What does it feel like?"
Kolt thought for a moment. "Something like a bit of both. I feel like the person I was before has been split, honestly. I know by myself am not as smart anymore. I'm not as strong. Like you lot ate it up and I have to get you to cooperate to have those pieces back."
"I'm sorry," Watcher said softly.
"Don't be," Kolt said. "I don't think it was your fault."
"I wonder what the scientists meant to have happen in creating us," Watcher said. "I didn't really exist back then, so I don't know."
"And I wasn't even lucid at the time. They kept me pretty drugged up."
Watcher nodded.
They reached Kolt's rooms and Watcher said, "You should sleep. I will keep an eye on things."
"I know," Kolt said, amused.
He entered his room as Watcher became invisible behind him and slowly put his shoes and glasses back where they belonged, sliding into bed to sleep with a soft sigh.
Part 56
A.N. - You will never guess what the next part of this story is going to be about, lol. I'm thinking I'll do a short story about Beater and Cedar next. Excited about that! Leave me a comment if you are so inclined :3
That feeling when the ghost of your boyfriend/husband is haunting you as you both grieve what you had. @eldest-daughter-syndrome we really are out here having a rough time with these characters.
Ellie is once again having a bad time in one of the AUs @eldest-daughter-syndrome has for him. What is the best way to stop a magic user from using magic? Muzzle him and bind his hands, of course. Poor guy. No one is coming for him this time.
Summary: Ivan's friend and boss was taken by an unknown entity, forcing Ivan to take on a new identity and go undercover looking for Kolt. When he finds him, Kolt is in rough shape and the escape isn't as clean as either of them could have hoped for. Now, with Kolt free, and Ivan captured, Kolt can only try to recover in time to rescue his friend and keep him from being turned into a living weapon in his place.
Fallen Masterlist - Part 53
Content: mentioned past abuse, dehumanization, unhealthy thought patterns and some healthy ones too
Gale slept longer than he had since he could remember. In a bed just as comfortable as Dr. LeAnne's, but this bed was his own. That meant that he didn't need to be chained to the headboard so Dr. LeAnne felt safe enough to sleep with him beside her, though he never would have done anything to harm her.
He was given several filling meals, each coming with treats the like of which he only got from Dr. LeAnne after he had done very well after a mission or after training. They were seemingly endless, and Kolt always had something in his pockets if he felt that Gale was starting to look a little hungry.
Gale started to remember most of the foods he was having, and he remembered just how easy it had been to get them. Sure, chocolate had been a tasty little treat before all of this, but it had been easy to get his hands on. Pretty much every store had chocolate in stock somewhere. It shouldn't have been the most decadent thing he had ever wrapped his lips around to receive a tiny piece from Dr. LeAnne.
It was strange, being away from her. He was treated like a human being now, not like someone's barely contained lap dog, and it made looking back on everything that happened strange and deeply unsettling.
Remembering things like being chained to the headboard to sleep with Dr. LeAnne like it was a reward made him squirm. He hoped he would never have to tell anyone about that ever. He would rather die than admit to how comfortable and loved he had felt on those nights.
He felt downright ill when he remembered how he licked chocolate off of Dr. LeAnne's fingers. He had been so desperate. She had been so pleased. It had all felt right in the moment, but now he couldn't even look at chocolate without wanting to throw up.
And, despite not telling anyone this, everything changed what snacks they gave him and Kolt had granola bars without chocolate chips on him, as well as the ones with for himself.
And, yet, sometimes he caught himself missing her and wondering where she had gone and what had happened to her in the aftermath of everything.
There were a hundred other things he had to deal with inside his head everyday, one of which was his newfound hatred of mirrors. As he slowly started to find the pieces of himself that had been broken and discarded, trying to figure out where they fit within himself, he couldn't recognize the face in the mirror. The scar didn't help, of course, but there was something else about it. Something he couldn't put his finger on, but he didn't feel like he was Gale anymore, and he wasn't sure if he would ever be able to find his way back to being Gale.
At the same time, he was too afraid to give up the name. He had fought so hard for it. He'd left Dr. LeAnne for it. He needed it. So, he kept using the name despite how it did not fit him anymore. Despite how he didn't not fit it.
"Gale!"
Gale looked over from the window he had been staring out of, just watching the cars go by as he thought. He did a lot of thinking as he searched for himself and put himself back together. His therapist had warned him not to do it too much, but that a couple hours of contemplation every day was probably a good idea as he worked through everything.
It was tempting to do more, but then he lost himself in the spirals. In the disgust as he remembered how badly he had been broken and how he had become an animal and a weapon, just like they all wanted him to be. He would spiral down and down into his thoughts, trying to find more fragments of his childhood, straining to remember his old friends names, trying to remember if he did recognize that dead man that Dr. Anderson had showed him that first night he had been pulled out of his room to be tortured. He was sure he probably did, and it was distressing that Gale hadn't been able to remember anything besides a vague notion of good drinks and bad singing.
"Gale?"
Right, someone had called to him. Maybe he had done too much thinking for the day.
"Sorry," Gale said, pulling himself from his thoughts as he looked at Penelope. She was Kolt's new friend. Gale still wasn't really sure what to think about this.
She smiled at him and said, "We were wondering where you were. Did you change you mind about going on a walk?"
"Oh! No!" Gale said, surprised. How could he have forgotten? Him, Penelope, and Kolt didn't get to go outside very often with what had happened, but Phoenix and Lynx had set aside people and resources to make sure that they were able to go out into the sun at least once every couple of weeks. Gale loved being able to go outside without being harnessed and collared. "Thank you for looking for me."
"Not hard to find you," Penelope said, pointing up at a nearby camera with a smile. "I have eyes in the skies."
Gale smiled, but couldn't come up with a response to the joke. He knew he should have been able to. He could vaguely recall banter between him and Kolt all of the time, and he remembered the sweet feeling of saying something witty enough to make Kolt choke on his drink, but he just couldn't remember how to do it anymore. Besides, he always lagged too far behind in conversations these days to try and say something really funny anymore.
Penelope didn't comment on his non-responsiveness and simply waved for him to follow. Which really meant to walk alongside her. Dr. LeAnne had enjoyed having him walk along behind her, like he was guarding her, but people here wanted him to walk like he was their equal.
They said he was everyone's equal. He tried his best to remember that most days.
"What have you been up to today?" Penelope asked. Because she and everyone else just asked questions like that all the time. Like it was normal.
He knew it was normal. It just... it had been a long time. It would feel normal again someday, he hoped.
"I had breakfast," he said softly, "And then I read for a while and did my physical therapy. I uh... don't remember what I did after that."
That was normal, he told himself. Memory gaps were to be expected. That was on the list of things he could expect as he recovered which he had taped to his mirror, but it was hard not to expect to be caught of guard and to be punished for not knowing something.
"Did you have lunch?" Penelope asked.
"I.... I don't- oh! Yes, I did. There was celery."
"Do you like celery?"
"No. But I must have eaten it. There is still some in my teeth."
Penelope chuckled as they arrived at an elevator and stepped inside. It moved without having to press any buttons, and Gale assumed Penelope must have just told the system where they were going. She did that a lot. Gale didn't have a solid grasp on what she was exactly, but he knew she was deeply integrated with the Dragon Gang's computer systems and could just make things happen or find people. It was odd.
"I think Kolt is grabbing water bottles for us," Penelope said. "The walking guard is already out there scattered along our path. I think we're going to be going out through a couple of parks and we're going to stop and eat at a diner run by one of Phoenix's friends."
"How long ago was lunch?" Gale asked, annoyed to find that he had forgotten his watch somewhere again. He needed to wear it because of how time slipped from him so easily after the labs. He'd had someone else controlling his schedule for so long. There had been too many hours left by himself with nothing to occupy his mind. Somehow trying to remember to put a watch on was more of a hassle than he had ever expected.
"It's about 4 PM right now, so we'll be getting there around time for dinner," Penelope said. "We have snacks if you need something before then."
"I think I'm fine," Gale said, knowing he would accept a snack from Kolt as soon as his old friend offered him one. It was Kolt's favorite thing to do when they met up these days.
Penelope nodded and they stepped off the elevator on the ground floor. Kolt was waiting for them, one arm held tightly around Bret's shoulder. "Hurry! Let's got before he changes him mind!"
"I am not going to change my mind!" Bret argued, but he looked like he did want to escape back into the halls. He sometimes joined them on their walks, but only when someone dragged him kicked and screaming from his office.
"I have some sunscreen this time," Penelope told him.
"And bug spray?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at her.
"That too," she said, rolling her eyes.
He stopped squirming. "Oh, alright. I guess. Could I change my shoes?"
Kolt smirked and reached into his bag, dropping a pair of Bret's walking shoes on the ground in front of the techie.
"How the crap did you get your hands on my shoes?" Bret asked, horrified.
Kolt grinned. "I cannot be held responsible for what codes Watcher sees and remembers."
Penelope laughed as Bret grumbled and put his shoes on. "Fine, but you have to put these shoes in your bag. I'm not leaving them down here."
Kolt put Bret's crocs in his bag without complaint and Penelope handed Bret the bug spray and sunscreen.
Kolt smiled as he offered Gale a protein bar, and Gale took it, opened it, and started nibbling on it with just a little nod in response.
Waylon, who had become something of a beloved errand boy for Phoenix and Lynx, jogged over to them. He smiled and said, "You have the go ahead to head out. Lynx and Phoenix got caught up in sparring with one another so they sent me to let you know that you're good to go."
"Thank you, Waylon," Kolt said warmly.
This side of Kolt was so strange. Gale thought he had just forgotten it until he head heard Phoenix razzing him over how aloof and cold he used to be compared to how he acted now. It was strange to think that Gale hadn't been the only one to change.
The sun on Gale's skin was warm and perfect. Even when he was out on missions for Harry and Co Labs, he didn't get to go outside much during the daytime. He closed his eyes, turning his face to the sun to really soak it in for a moment before stepping along a little quicker to catch up with the others.
He settled in next to Kolt as he talked with Penelope on his other side.
"So Beater is still missing?" she asked.
Kolt shrugged. "I guess so. I can't sense him as well as I can sense Watcher, but I sometimes get glimpses of what he's feeling. Mostly, I think he's been pretty satisfied with whatever he's doing, and he's not hurting me or anything."
"He probably got tired that you wouldn't let him hit things all the time like he wanted to."
"Probably," Kolt said. "I just hope he isn't getting in trouble."
That was the other thing. The very real hallucinations. That was new, too, and it made Gale uneasy in ways he couldn't explain.
"I haven't seen much of Gambler, recently. What is he up to?" Penelope asked.
"I don't know," Kolt said with a frown. "I get the sense that whatever Beater is doing, he's helping out with from a distance. He feels really distracted. I figure I'll just let them get on with it."
"Yeah, I guess you still have Watcher. We all know he's your favorite," Bret said with a smile.
Kolt could only shrug and chuckle before the conversation turned to something else and Gale let his attention drift and wander as he enjoyed the walk.
Part 55
A.N. - There are maybe 2 or 3 more chapters after this, and then I'm going to be writing a story focused around what Beater is up to. You'll get a taste of what is up to in the next chapter. Hint hint, it has something to do with Resources.
Summary: Ivan's friend and boss was taken by an unknown entity, forcing Ivan to take on a new identity and go undercover looking for Kolt. When he finds him, Kolt is in rough shape and the escape isn't as clean as either of them could have hoped for. Now, with Kolt free, and Ivan captured, Kolt can only try to recover in time to rescue his friend and keep him from being turned into a living weapon in his place.
Fallen Masterlist - Part 52
Content: Multiple whumpees, living weapon whumpee, villain whumpee, self harm to escape, hand whump
"Hello Jade," Jordan said with a sour smile. "It's been a while. How has the EVU been treating you?"
"Better than the hero program has been treating you," Jade said. "How long have you been in it, now? Since you were a teenager, right? Tell me, did you every become a project leader like you wanted to?"
Kolt could hear his teeth grinding as he composed himself. "I will have you know that hero work has nothing to do with selfish gain. Unlike vigilante work."
Jade smirked, tilting her head. Her wiry hair shifting across the very tops of her shoulders. "Is that so? Well, from my perspective, the optics of saves, rescues, and robberies stopped by Vigilantes compared to heroes is like night and day, my friend, but we're not here to argue about that, are we?"
"No," he said. "We're not."
Silence fell across the concrete and Kolt dared to sneak a glance at Gale, who was outright staring at him, eyes wide with confusion and fear.
Kolt swallowed hard. Gale didn't deserve this. Kolt had finally managed to free him just to land in trouble with the heroes and hope that they would back down and hand them over to the vigilantes. There was no promise that the vigilantes wouldn't turn him, Penelope, and Gale in to custody if they were handed over. It didn't look good for the vigilantes to be working with the Dragon gang, never mind confirmed villains. They would need to sacrifice someone to win back their good graces with the government somehow. And that would most likely be Kolt and his friends.
Gale shifted a little and Kolt could see a glow coming from the seams of his cuffs. Kolt frowned, curious and confused until he realized that Gale was trying to short out the cuffs, no matter what it might do to his hands.
Kolt shook his head slightly, trying to keep Gale from hurting himself, but his old friend kept working on it as Jordan finally spoke.
"We need to decide where we go from here," he said darkly. "If you think you are getting these three, you are sorely mistaken."
Jade just shrugged at him and smiled. "Is that so? They were contracted to aid us in getting back one of our vigilantes recently, which, mind you, is not illegal by Crest Cove rules. Which, I believe, are the rules to be defaulted to when there is a disagreement between the EVU and the Hero Program."
Jordan snorted. "Those rules have been changed, or have you not been keeping up with the votes?"
"Oh, I have. Those changes were reversed this morning because the corruption investigation revealed that the rules unfairly favored a couple of the companies that lobbied for that rule change."
"It's true, Jordan," Opera said softly. "I saw those headlines."
Jordan snorted. "Right. Well, we caught these three attempting to run. They hijacked an ambulance to do so instead of simply waiting for us to clear this all up."
"As if any of us would trust heroes to clear up a mess we were dealing with," Jade replied, sharp and sarcastic. "Please, you lot cannot be trusted to handle anything with common sense. Not when you are so handcuffed by the tangle of laws and rules that are making this very city a playground for corruption and gangs."
"A gang that you are fraternizing with," Jordan said, so angry that spittle flew from his lips.
"They may be named the Dragon Gang, but they are an operation attempting to gain vigilante status, which I support, of course. I'm not trying to run a monopoly here. Their main goal at the moment is to help with the corruption in the city. The company we just dealt with, for example, and the Resource Program. There is no problem with that."
"So the rumors are true," Rebecca snapped. "The EVU is becoming a den for villains and gang members."
"No, we are trying to do right by Crestlen," Jade said. "Last chance. Give us our contractors, and this doesn't have to get messy. We will need them for cleaning up the mess we made today and for dealing with the Resource Program."
"The Resource Program is an important organization for this city!" Peter argued. "We cannot lose that. Don't you realize how much support the Resources provide to heroes!?"
"Against their will," Phoenix said with a charming smile. It looked a lot like Jade's smile, at the moment. "They are slaves from the moment they are entered into the program. We have a few ex-Resources here in our group should you want to hear the truth."
"It wouldn’t even be the full truth," Player said, speaking up from the back of the group. "They are putting detonation chips in people's heads now. I am certain you heroes know about that with how often you use the poor creatures."
"SHUT UP!" Jordan screamed, and silence fell across the group.
"Boss man," Pufferfish said softly. "I think we should let them have these three. We can fight it later. Get some warrants and-"
Jordan turned on Pufferfish, flicking his fingers at the man who was slammed to the ground, gasping in pain by the speed of it.
The other Blue Eagles team members gasped and cried out, flinching back and letting go of their captives.
Gale used the moment to his advantage, his cuffs exploding into shrapnel as he burst to his feet, slamming his hands into Peter, a flash of orange going up between them.
Kolt moved too. He hadn't burned through the cuffs for fear of the damage it would cause him without the healing factor that Gale had been given, so he simply barreled into Rebecca, who's mouth was open as she cried out for her teammate.
Kolt tumbled and rolled to his feet just in time to see Penelope rend her bindings apart in one motion, opening fire on Jordan with the weapons in her arms and legs.
"Gale!" Kolt shouted as his friend got to his feet from where Peter convulsed, his side and torso badly burned.
Gale ran to Kolt, grabbing onto him as the two ran across the no man's land to the Dragon Gang and Jade. Penelope and Shadow Six laid out cover fire on the heroes for them.
"Penny!" Kolt screamed.
She shot one more round at Jordan, who managed to get behind the ambulance before she sprinted to them, joining the milling group as they tried to get the three into one of their cars.
Kolt ended up with Gale practically in his lap as their car peeled out, Penelope being helped into another one where she could help shoot at Jordan and Rebecca to keep the two heroes off of the cars while they made their escape.
Kolt stared out the window, watching the heroes mill about, clearly angry while trying to help their injured comrades. He could feel the adrenaline leaking out of him, leaving him shaking as he held Gale to his chest.
"You made it," someone said, putting a hand on his shoulder.
He twisted to look and Lynx smiled down at him. "Are you hurt?"
"Just some bruises," Kolt said. "Oh, Gale! Your hands."
He dug Gale's hands out from between them and looked at them, grateful to see that they were a little red, but they were clearly healing as blisters slowly went down on his skin.
Kolt breathed a sigh of relief. "At least some good came of this. Gale, this is Lynx. He's Phoenix's second in command now."
"It's nice to meet you," Lynx said warmly as Gale lifted his head to look at him. "How are you feeling."
Gale's face was frozen into one of mild confusion. He muttered answer that both Kolt and Lynx pretended to understand.
"You're going to be fine now," Lynx promised. "Just hang in there until we get to the EVU. They have some healers and people who can help with your head a little."
Gale nodded before turning and pressing his face into Kolt's neck. It was jarring. Gale had always been a bit touchy, but never this clingy. It was scary to think that even when he couldn't remember much he was this desperate for physical contact.
"Oh, Gale," Kolt whispered. "What did they do to you?"
Gale's breath hitched in his throat and his held onto Kolt tighter. Kolt didn't say a word about it.
"The situation with the other ambulance is resolved," Vista said as he came into Powell's room where two healers were fussing over his back.
"Thank goodness," he said. "They're on their way? Did they say that Gale was alright?"
"Minimal injuries," Vista confirmed, coming to sit on the counter beside Seren.
Obsidian had left, but that was because they were delivering a report to the assassin's guild. Wassail, who was laying on the bed next to Powell and generally being a nuisance to healers, smiled. "That's good. That went pretty well, all things considered!"
"Yeah," Vista said. "Kolt found you pretty quick."
"Just wish he had waited a minute," Powell said with a wince. "He caught me and Obsidian kissing."
"YOU KISSED!?" Wassail gasped, getting to his knees and grabbing Powell by the shoulders. "My brother in Heralines, spare no details!!"
Powell coughed, a little embarrassed. "You know, I think maybe the healers need more space, Wassail, and-"
"Oh, I want to hear this," one of the healers said from where she was prodding at a bruise on the back of his head.
He sighed deeply. "Okay, just don't let Obsidian know, alright?"
"Okay, okay, okay!" Wassail agreed. "Tell us everything!"
Powell started to tell the story, grinning widely as he remembered how attractive Obsidian was coming down the hall.
"I prefer not to be kissed by someone covered in blood, but to each their own," Seren said, rolling their eyes. "That is so gross. You two are so weird."
"Come on, Seren," Vista said, bumping shoulders with them. "It's pretty romantic."
"It sounds like a good way to get a blood disease."
The group snorted and Powell said, "I'm just so excited that we're finally together. I mean, I know you guys told me they were interested, but I was so scared that we were all reading them wrong. Or that they did like me but would never say it or agree to it because they're an assassin or something."
"What are you going to do for your first proper date?" Wassail asked.
Powell felt a blush creeping across his face and ears and down his neck.
"Oh," Wassail said, meaningfully, raising an eyebrow at Vista.
"NO! No, stop that," Powell said, smacking Wassail. "It is nothing like that!"
It was everything like that. Powell had so many fantasies built up about him and Obsidian now, and every single one of them flashed through his head.
He swallowed hard and said, "Look, what's more important is what we're going to be doing to celebrate the fact that I'm back!"
"I doubt that Jade will let you out anytime soon. Those people from the lab will probably be looking for you," Seren said thoughtfully.
Powell groaned and Wassail laughed. "We can still have fun! Vista and I will throw you a party, man, no worried."
"You'd better," Powell said. "I deserve it."
"Deserve what?" Obsidian asked as they stepped into the room, quietly closing the door behind them. They were dressed in loose black pants and an old band shirt with the collar stretched out badly. They had washed off, their dark hair spiky and damp.
Powell responded without thinking. "A kiss."
Obsidian stared at him, rolled their eyes and came to sit beside him. "Is that so?"
"Only if you're comforta-"
Obsidian caught him by the jaw and kissed him, causing a rousing cheer from their friends and the two healers in the room.
Chapter 54
A.N. - Sorry about there not being a mid week chapter. I had a really weird week on this one and realized that things are a little out of hand when it comes to my notes for this world as a whole. I got a little overwhelmed because I hate having to re-do my notes.
Nothing better imo than a living weapon that, the moment they escape/get rescued/are retired, just physically shuts down. After years of being pushed past their limits physically, after being moulded unwillingly into something better than perfection, their body just can’t take it anymore.
They lose a lot of weight, and their muscle mass diminishes. Old injuries that were originally nothing have started to ache tremendously, muscles never ending their whining. Then, Whumpee starts getting sick all the time, too, and spends a concerning amount of time bed-ridden. Even weapons have their limits, and they went past those a long time ago.
I just think it makes it a lot more horrifying, especially to a caretaker who didn’t know the full deal until now, to see the contrast between the fearsome, unstoppable Weapon and the frail, sickly Whumpee and know wordlessly exactly how far they got pushed back then.
So, guess who has to reorganize all of my notes for Crestlen... guys I don't wanna do this. But I gotta because I can't remember anything. But the politics are all so complex and all of the organizations are wild and I have no idea how to notate all of it without getting lost in the sauce. But if I can figure this out, then I can really start touching all of those tasty politics and I will be able to jump in anywhere in the timeline and anywhere in the cities and just write anything without worrying as much about plot holes. I just have to figure this out
