Tea

I drabble sometimes I guess. Also I have a cat.

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Born from a shard of ice, a young boy moved from place to place, hated by everyone, called a monster. Right arm left leg, right eye left face, a beautiful see-through blue, cold to the touch as it was made of ice. No expression could be seen on his face, almost lifeless as it traveled. No destination awaits the young boy and yet he still keeps going, determines to find his purpose, his reasoning of being alive. No need to stop and eat, no need to stop and sleep. He wasn't human he knew that much, made of ice, and yet even in the hot sun of the desert, he wouldn't melt. Does he have a mother? He did not know, Does he have a father? He also did not know. Not that he cared about either one. As he grew, as he traveled, as he saw new places, met new people, he had come to realize, the memories of people, animals, plants, all flowed through him. He could see everything water passes through. The painful memories that people locked away, he would take away as he walked past. He learned to use his gift, learned to understand his reasoning of life, the purpose he had been seeking has always been with him. He was made of Ice to not feel the painful things he would be taking away from others, whether it was the cry of a forest being cut down, a family of deer's morning for the lost of a young fawn, or a human's locked away memories of abuse, because Ice is the coldest thing and simply being stuck in a place filled with freezing weather and ice everywhere can slowly kill someone, making them numb and not feel a thing as their life slowly gets sucked away. And so he continues to travel, far and wide, living through the different stages of Earth, practically immortal. Maybe one day he would melt back into the ground, maybe one day he would settle down, find love, learn to live like a human. But until then, he is happy to continue traveling and learning.

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This is really random but I wish I was a cat

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I can’t express enough how much I hate online schooling

This school year has been the most stressful year of my life. It’s hard enough being a senior and prepping for graduation and college but I’m the type of person who learns best when I’m in a school environment and the teachers are physically in front of me. In a way I suppose it helps me feel more monitored. This online schooling is just not for me. My GPA dropped so bad and it makes me feel like shit that I even let that happened but I just can’t focus and learn well at home. Thinking about school now makes me want to curl up and die because I can no longer face my grades. I understand grades aren’t everything but like many other people, I was raised with expectations to uphold. I’m actually really good at math and I’m one of those weird people who loves math but, I can’t learn it virtually. Learning math virtually to me is like watching a random video on YouTube. I’m also not great in the English department but I don’t feel comfortable emailing or asking for help during class. I’m not saying I can’t email my teachers, I can, I’m just not comfortable emailing for help since before the pandemic I never really needed too. As a hands-on learner, I feel the need to have my teachers in front of me, to help and guide, to create an actual class environment, to give out problems that is actually engaging. Yes, virtual classes have a chat box we can text in, but that's different. As much as I hate interacting with people or even being near them, to be able to hear people is something I miss. Being able to do physical group work, hands-on activities, these things matter to me and it probably matters to many other students. I understand that we can’t do any of that due to Covid-19 and that we still need to go to school and the safest way is doing virtual learning but it’s hard. I always thought I learned better at home but I was wrong. Semester ended and I feel like shit, I hate myself for not reaching my own expectations, for how bad my grades have dropped, for everything school related. If I had to say one thing I learned from virtual learning, it would be that it is the worst thing to ever happen to me and my self-esteem. 

P.S. I do in fact put effort in my school life, but I am also a procrastinator and anyone who is a procrastinator would probably feel the same way I do when I say this, if not something similar, my home is my comfort zone, I like to be me at home and being me means I end up putting off work to relax from my very stressful life and from people in general. 

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Just a random post

I’m a slut for angst, I’m not gonna lie. I’ve come to the terms that I only really read angst when I am desperately in need to cry but can’t. Crying is hard for a person who has solidified their heart to the emotion. My trigger just happens to be reading angst.   

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I wanna do some fan art but I'm lowkey scared of messing up, I'm a perfectionist when it comes to drawing and it'll hurt me a lot if I draw a character and it doesn't turn out the way I want it. Any advice?

[cliptictea]

Something I wanna read part 2

So I made a previous post about something I wanted to read but that was a while back. Anyways...

I wanna read a mafia (of some sort) Haikyuu story but instead of fighting with guns or swords they fight via volleyball. Instead of the teams being from a school they would literally just be the mafia group names, Karasuno, Nekoma, Fukurodani, etc. Individual members of groups would of course be from different places but all the mafia groups would be located near on another. To determine who the top mafia group is, they would battle it out on the court playing volleyball. In this AU, volleyball should be associated with being apart of the mafia. If there was a turf war, it would be taken place as a volleyball game. 

Pretty much to conclude, volleyball is the weapon in this au.

… my aunt says I think of the weirdest things....

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League of Legends have the best ads.

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My uncle plays the piano every night before bed. He plays the same song/notes every time. Its been years and honestly I want to listen to something else before bed now.

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Chickens

So my older sister went to kill chickens. This is something a lot of different cultures would do, especially Asian culture as far as I know. She and my mom went to kill 60 chickens and there was this other Asian family there. The other family was also there to kill 60 chickens. 

My sister was telling me that during the process of killing the chickens, the guy sell them had this very sad look on his face because of the amount of chicken that he was losing. My sister, aunt, and me laughed at the story but at the same time I still felt bad. Anyways when she and my mom was leaving, with 52 instead of 60 chickens, he told my mom that he also killed cows and pigs and for my mom to inform my moms friends too. I told my sister that he was trying to save the rest of his chicken after losing 112 in a single day.

Also I apologize if this post made anyone uncomfortable or offended 

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Bowls and plates in my house be like

buys 40 bowls 

after two months 

5 bowls remaining 

where did the other 35 bowls go

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Imagine living in a world like Pocoyo where everything is white. No blue sky or field of green grass. 

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I did not need to know anything about Thermodynamics and Energy Diagrams. But did I just sit through and watched the whole crash course video because Hinata and Noya showed up in it? Yes, Yes I did. And I’m sure many people did the same thing.

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Ramen

I’m Asian, so I grew up eating different types of ramen. My little cousin Yaya is mixed Black and Asian and only really ate one brand. She refuses to eat any other brand of ramen except the one you would get a Wal-Mart. In my opinion, it is one of the most plain ramen I’ve ever had and I’ve had a lot of ramen in my life. I don’t know but It’s kind of sad for me that she doesn’t want to experience eating other types of ramen except that really plain one that people would add things too to make it taste better. It’s whatever, I guess I’ll just have to live with this.

also shes six.

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My older sister got better rolls in Genshin impact then I did. She doesn't even know how to play the game, I'm technically playing it for her.

I keep telling her to rotate her screen so she could move her character and see her surrounding better but she doesn't want too.

She *does a side quest*: where Jack i can't find him.

Me: well maybe if you rotate your screen you would find him.

Me *rotates her screen for her*: ooh look there's jack.

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My phone gives me two types of notifications for YouTube.

Notification, the one that alerts me that someone uploaded a vid or a recommendation vid

Silent notification, the one that doesn't alert me when someone uploads a vid or a recommendation vid and instead just silently places the vid in my notifications under silent notification

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I live with my dad who lives with my grandparents, so technically I live with my grandparents.

Anyways, they have this big tree next to the house and they decided to cut it down. It always upsets me when people decide to cut down trees. Trees are a part of nature and I consider myself to be a spiritual person so it's just sad. Being around nature makes me feel more alive and to think I have to listen to people cute down a tree that I spent 6 years bounding with is just heartbreaking to me.

The Earth needs trees, we need trees, trees make oxygen, trees help clean the air human polluted, they house animals and insect, cutting down a tree is just not cool. Please don't cut trees down.

(This is all my opinion)

[cliptictea]

This is one of my many random post to come in the near future.

Sometimes I think I be playing to much Genshin impact becuz when I play Roblox I now always think I can fly and when I play among us, I always think I can jump.